The Tomoeda Maiden
Chapter XXV: Back to Reality
There was so much damage done, it would take more than a few months to repair what had been damaged. So many peoples homes had been destroyed and so many of the forestry of the island had been burnt down and damaged. The statues that once stood proudly in the town square had been damaged into smithereens. There were weapons strewn all over the place – in fact, this scene had been all too familiar.
I've been here three months since Tomo Eda died. Slowly but surely, the island was progressing even in that short amount of time.
The politics of the island was the first to be reconstructed. It had been so fully damaged that it needed to be demolished. The temple was no longer the head of the island, but rather, they were just a symbol of peace. Of course, the Kinomotos were still the head of the temple despite Tomo Eda saying that everyone would hate the Kinomotos and blame Sakura's family for all the destruction. In fact, it was now more than ever that the citizens of Ling Shi supported Sakura's family. They knew very well of the corruption that had unfolded within the temple, despite the fact that the temple had been trying really hard to keep that knowledge away from the public.
The citizens voted on who should be the new leader of the island. That was what was decided. It was a surprising turn of events who got chosen as the island leader, really. The citizens all came up with candidates, then voted on it, and to my surprise it was neither any temple people (so that includes Yamato) but they wanted someone who was not a temple person, but was someone the islanders could trust.
It was Eriol.
I think we were all surprised, but we were happy too. Even though Eriol got on my nerves, he would make an excellent leader and he would surely point this island in the right direction. The future may looked bleak in the beginning, but now things were starting to pick up. Of course, Eriol still lived in his mansion and still kept himself shrouded in mystery. He never did reveal his house again after the battle, which left people to wonder where his manor was. I still lived there, of course, for now.
Touya Kinomoto, the 'Supreme Priest' no longer wanted any hierarchical ladders within the temple, but rather, he wanted things equal. A priest or priestess would just be that, nothing more or less. However, to be a priest now living in the temple would be now more than ever restricted. It could not be taken lightly anymore; a person now has to go through rough spiritual training and screening to become a priest, to prevent people like the Eda brothers to ever become a priest.
The people who were seen as dangerous were put into prisons in the temple. The former temple people, who had shown their true colours, had been put into the jail cells in their own homes. It was for the best, though. Even though they were imprisoned they still weren't treated like garbage, Sakura made sure of that, she instead tried to point out their sins and hoped that prison would rehabilitate these peoples souls, instead of punishing them to eternal damnation.
The island was slowly being reconstructed. With the unity of the people, things got back to normality. Like I said, however, things weren't completely restored to their former glory.
In other news, Tomoyo had her baby. A healthy little girl who looked a lot like Tomoyo. She had Eriol's eyes but the rest of the features were all Tomoyo, and that's what was the main concern right now. Even though Sakura had duties in the temple now and to her people, she would never hesitate to come to Eriol's manor and help Tomoyo out. Even her older brother did not mind, too. Lately though he's been treating me quite frigidly, even though we all returned in one piece – and that included his little sister.
xXxXxXx
"All turned out good in the end." Eriol said proudly as he overlooked the island's main town on his top balcony.
"Yeah." I said.
"Thank you so much for your help." Eriol patted me on the back, "I didn't expect it to turn out this way."
"It was all Yamato's doing, really." I turned to Yamato who was breathing in the breeze.
"It's funny how someone so peaceful looking can turn out to be a menace." Eriol joked. "By judging by his appearance, he seems nothing like his late brother…"
"I suppose I got my family's signature evilness, haven't I?" Yamato smirked. "I did it for the good of the people, I swear!"
We all laughed. Even though it was nothing to laugh at, it was still good to finally enjoy this time of peace. There was no corruption, no Tomo Eda, no worrying about anyone else.
"I can't believe you're getting married today, Eriol." I patted his back. "It's going to be quite a spectacle, wouldn't you say?"
"I was hoping to get married before little Chihiro was born." Eriol sighed, "But I guess there's nothing we can do about it, is there?"
We were all donned in clothing Tomoyo had made for us. It was not traditional temple clothing, but it was simply just suits – very well made suits, I may add. It's nothing like I've ever seen before. Back in Heung Gong, we used traditional costumes as well in marriage ceremonies. However, these embodied formal yet relaxed at the same time. While Yamato and I were wearing black and white suits, Eriol was wearing a navy blue suit with a white cravat. As usual, he looked sophisticated – his new title was the topping of his classy cake.
"We should get going downstairs, shouldn't we?" Yamato asked.
"Why a private wedding, Eriol?" I asked him as we headed down the stairs.
"I've never been one to publically expose all my life in one place." Eriol replied, "I like to add a bit of mystery into my life. Besides, no one will even know I'm getting married except a select few, who is invited to my manor in the first place."
The manor's garden would be the place Tomoyo and Eriol would be having their wedding. Going against temple tradition, the bride and groom were not allowed to see each other before the wedding started.
As we went downstairs there were already guests chattering about and they were going into the garden to sit, where all the chairs had been neatly placed. You could tell Tomoyo had designed and planned the decorations and the wedding itself. There were bits of little details put around here and there and if you knew Tomoyo well enough, you knew it was those little touches that screamed, "Tomoyo Daidouji" all over them. There were flowers decorated all over the house and going into the yard, which I knew was a Sakura contribution, as she had the ability to make flowers appear from nowhere.
"Hey, Hui." I waved to my old comrade.
"Hello, Mr. Syaoran." Hui bowed, "So today's Eriol's big day, isn't it?"
"It sure is." I smiled.
"It's nice to see happy things happen on this island for once." Hui smiled, "I remember my wedding with my wife… this just brings back old memories. How about you, Syaoran? Do you have a beautiful lady waiting back home?"
Eriol started to laugh at his question. Hui was oblivious and I was feeling extremely uncomfortable.
"I don't have a woman back home." I replied.
"Really? I would think someone as handsome as you would already have a wife or a girlfriend or something… not to be a creep or anything." Hui laughed uncomfortably.
"I'm sure he has his eyes set on a special someone…" Yamato said in a sing-song-voice.
I stepped on his foot to shut him up.
Yes, it was true, I did have someone on my mind – her name was Sakura Kinomoto… however, even after all this time, I did not tell her face-to-face or look straight into her eyes that I was in love with her. She had been too busy and she dealt with too much trauma and stress after the past events that I couldn't possibly tell her. I would tell her when the time was right. Sakura treated me as she did before, with such vibrancy and amiability, but you could tell that she was never the same again after what happened.
"I guess I'm going to go out to the yard now. The ceremony is about to begin." Eriol said.
"See you outside." I waved to my old teacher and current friend. Again, it's funny how things turn out.
"Hi, Syaoran." I heard a familiar voice from behind me. Even though I knew it was her, I still jumped out of nervous habit. My heart was pumping blood like mad as she approached me.
"S-Sakura…" I said, flustered. I knew I shouldn't act that way towards her but I couldn't help it. It was nice to see her smiling, however – and she looked especially lovely in her light blue dress that the other women were wearing as well.
"Tomoyo's finally tying the knot, I never thought I'd live to see the day." She joked, but I knew she meant it quite literally.
"It shows how far along we've come." I smiled.
"Yeah. I'm an aunt to little Chihiro!" Sakura squealed.
"Where's that little monster anyway?" I joked.
Sakura pouted, "Don't call her a monster!"
"I'm sorry." I scratched the nape of my neck as the hairs stood up. Sakura was kind of scary when angry, even if it was pretend-angry.
"Anyway, she's with Yukito. He loves children, you know." Sakura said as a-matter-of-factly.
"I can see you do, too." I said. "You know, the way you act around little Chihiro."
"I want one of my own someday." Sakura said dreamily. Then she shook her head, "I first actually have to get married first. My first marriage did not count."
"I'll pretend that wedding never happened."
"Good, me too." Sakura took hold of my arm.
"Come on, let's go… the piano music is playing. That's our cue to go out as well onto the aisle." Sakura whispered.
Going along with the piano music, Sakura and I walked with our arms linked between one another, preceding the bride, Tomoyo. We stood in our assigned spots; I with Eriol and her on the brides side. As all the groomsmen and bridesmaids had all come up here, everyone attentively stood as the bride was walking down the aisle with Sakura's brother, Touya. In a way Touya was like Tomoyo's older brother figure, especially since her own family had died off in an unfortunate turn of events.
Tomoyo looked especially radiant – her wavy locks all neatly tucked into an elegant bun and she wore a huge fairytale gown that was made with probably hundreds of layers of delicate and beautiful fabrics. Tomoyo did not wear a veil, but it wasn't needed anyway. Everyone was in awe at the beauty walking right in front of them all.
Touya would be the priest doing the ceremony. It did not last as long as Sakura's wedding, but this one was shorter because it did not completely adhere to the temples customs. Tomoyo considered herself apathetic to religion, as did Eriol, so they decided upon a private non-religious wedding, even though Touya was a priest himself, it was more of a symbolic thing more than anything else.
During the ceremony I stole a few glances to Sakura. I felt her green eyes linger towards my direction. We both shot each other glances and smiles – we felt in sync with our feelings towards this wedding – we were happy, happy for both of our friends who were tying the knot here.
"Do you take Eriol Hiiragizawa as your husband?" Touya asked with a sincere, genuine smile. He was happy that his cousin would finally be able to be happy even after all this, she would be married to the man she loved.
In tears, Tomoyo nodded. "I do, I do!" She said enthusiastically. It caused some of us to give off a lighthearted laugh.
Sakura was wiping her tears at the scene. The wedding made my heart want to melt. I've never actually witnessed a wedding outside of my country – a real one out of love, so it was nice to see this for the first time.
"Do you take Tomoyo Daidouji as your wife?" Touya looked over to the groom.
"I do." Eriol took Tomoyos hands into his.
"If anyone has any objections to this wedding, speak now or forever hold your peace… or prepare to get pummeled by me." Touya joked.
Yamato looked at the couple with a bittersweet expression. Sakura had told me that Yamato was in love with Tomoyo, which is a big reason why he befriended her and helped us out along the way. He had loved her since their youth – but even though he was kind of sad that she was getting married, he was happy that she was happy. I felt the same way in regards to Sakura. If she was happy, then it didn't matter if she recuperated the feelings.
After that moment of silence, Tomoyo and Eriol finally locked lips. You could hear some people in the audience crying. Sakura was not audibly crying, but you can see her green eyes sparkle with the help of tears glazing in her eyes.
Eriol slipped the wedding band onto Tomoyo's finger and Tomoyo slipped the other wedding band onto Eriols. With this action, the two were finally officially married.
As they walked down the aisle in the opposite direction, people were throwing flower petals, confetti and rice. At the end of the aisle there were two birdcages with doves. Tomoyo and Eriol both stood in front of the birdcages. In unison, they both opened the birdcages, releasing the white birds out into the sky. It was a beautiful day to have this wedding, and it certainly was a beautiful wedding. One day, I would like to have a wedding that would rival theirs.
Afterwards was the wedding reception. It was abrupt if you compared it to my country's customs, but apparently it's how Eriol and Tomoyo wanted it to be. Immediately, guests sat down at the designated dining tables while Nakuru and other people working with Nakuru were serving up the food. Since I was Eriol's best man, we got to sit at the table where Tomoyo and Eriol were sitting at.
"Finally tied the knot." I said to Tomoyo, "Congratulations again, you two."
Tomoyo held Chihiro in her arms, lightly swaying her daughter back and forth as she fed the baby with the bottle. "I couldn't be happier."
"Now when's your turn to get married?" Eriol asked.
I sat there in silence as Sakura looked over to me.
"I'm just kidding with you, Syaoran." Eriol patted my back as I was eating. I ended up choking quite a bit, but I coughed it out.
"Eriol, please." Tomoyo said, "Stop torturing Syaoran."
"Can't help but tease my favourite little student." Eriol smiled.
We ended up talking about different things afterwards. The subject shifted from me to island affairs and future plans. However, the subject flung back to my direction eventually.
"So when are you going home?" Tomoyo asked.
"Oh, I forgot, Syaoran's not from here isn't he?" Yamato blinked.
"No. I'm from a country called Heung Gong." I replied. "As to that, I don't know…"
"Right, the ferry." Tomoyo added.
"Speaking of ferries, I reckon there's one coming soon to Heung Gong from here." Eriol said, "It seems soon is your time to go home."
"Do you know when?" My ears perked in interest.
"I believe I heard the ferry is coming back tomorrow." Eriol sipped his tea.
Sakura looked at me sadly, "Tomorrow?"
My heart dropped. I hadn't really thought about going home – I mean, before, going home was the number one thing I constantly thought about since I hated it here on Ling Shi, but now I actually grew to like it. I experienced so many things – some difficult and bizarre, but there were also good experiences that came out of here too – like meeting my new friends and meeting Sakura.
"I guess I'm finished my training." I said sadly, "I've learned all there is to know about spiritual training, after all, thanks to you and Eriol."
"It's my job." Eriol said.
Sakura didn't say anything but rather she just silently sat there sipping her drink. I could tell that she was unhappy about me leaving – and to be quite frank, I was way unhappier than she could possibly be.
"That sucks, Syaoran." Tomoyo frowned. "I really enjoyed having you here."
"I had to go home eventually, right?" I shrugged. I tried to present myself to be strong, but inside I was torn. I knew I had responsibilities back in Heung Gong. I was the Prince of Heung Gong, and the future King. I could not abandon my responsibility to my country. It just wouldn't be right, no matter how strongly I internally protested.
"Enough sadness." I said, "This is yours and Eriol's wedding, you shouldn't be spending it being sad!"
"…Oh, alright." Tomoyo said. "I'm going to make this the night you're going to remember, Syaoran. We will get you so intoxicated that you won't remember a thing!" She gave me an evil look.
"Uh… alright." I said in a scared tone of voice.
"You're going to dance." Eriol said.
"Oh god." I shook my head and put my face into my palm. "Alright, alright. Only because you two are my friends."
Sakura, even though she was laughing and smiling along with the rest of us, I could tell in her eyes that she was not all there and that her eyes did not match the same expression as her lips.
When dinner was done people partied, chattered and started drinking. Everyone was at the dance floor that had been temporarily placed in the yard. With Sakura's glow spell and illusion spell, she had happened to make the place look a lot more magical. The music was provided by some musicians on the island who were happy to provide their services free of charge. Tomoyo did not spend the whole night taking care of the baby – we all took turns taking care of the baby until little Chihiro fell asleep in her room, away from all the noise outside. Despite the promises of getting me intoxicated with alcohol, it didn't really happen. I was far too concerned about the events of tomorrow than to drink and get hung over the next day. I wasn't a kill-joy but I suppose I wasn't all there. Then again I never was much of a partier. It was much more enjoyable sitting at the sidelines watching people make fools of themselves than join the jamboree. Who knew that Eriol was actually a good dancer? Then again he always surprised me.
I wasn't' the only one who was not in the mood to dance. At the other side of the dance floor Sakura was sitting on the garden bench, looking out into the water. She was quiet all night, especially more so when she found out I was leaving for tomorrow.
"Hey." I approached Sakura as I sat down beside her.
"Syaoran!" Sakura was susprised at my sudden appearance. Even in the moonlight, you could see her cheeks flush a light rose colour.
"Why aren't you dancing?" I asked her.
"Oh… I'm not much of a dancer." She laughed lightly, "I have two left feet."
"Do you want to dance?" I extended my hand.
She was hesitant to take my hand, but I tried to make her feel comfortable. So I smiled at her reassuringly, letting it be known that I didn't care if she stepped on my feet.
"Oh, alright." Sakura gave in and took my hand.
The song that was playing was a series of slow songs, meant for couples to dance to. Tomoyo and Eriol started off the dance in the middle of the dance floor, then other couples – both friendly or romantic, were dancing along as well. Even Sakura's brother and Yukito were dancing together, both enraptured in the moment.
Sakura and I began to dance slowly, in which I noticed a few eyes were ogling towards our direction. Tomoyo and Eriol looked happy and amused as they saw me and Sakura dancing. However, Touya looked annoyed that I was dancing with his sister. Like I said, recently, Touya had been more and more impatient with me and I even caught him giving me dirty looks. How peculiar for someone to act that way after I saved his sisters life! Well, helped, but still.
We did not talk while dancing, instead we just kept our eyes on each other. At least I tried to look into Sakura's beautiful green eyes which looked even more captivating in the glow of the moonlight and Sakura's glow spell. She, however, was avoiding my gaze. She wasn't a bad dancer at all, but she was shy and she was trying to keep a distance from me.
I felt happy. This moment signified that we were finally in times of peace. That I was capable of being happy. That this person made me happy.
I had to tell her today. I've never told her in person how I felt – it was better now than never. I was aware of the consequences and confusion I would cause. After all, Sakura and I were separated through more than just distances, but according to my mother, we were separated through time as well. I was in love with someone I could possibly never be with in my own reality where I had come from. Even then, I still loved her, and I still wanted to tell her. If I didn't tell her today, I would regret it. At this point I didn't care if she loved me back – I was just happy to have met her. She really changed my life and by being here, I grew as an individual.
"Sakura, can we talk?" I asked her softly as I whispered in her ear. The song was nearing it's end.
She nodded in response, not uttering a word.
After the song we found a quiet space in Eriol's yard to talk to each other. It was at the bridge that was strewn on top of the water, joining the island where the prayer house was to the mainland of Eriol's yard.
"What is it?" Sakura asked with a small smile.
"Sakura." I took her hands into mine and stared into her eyes. My heart was going into overdrive.
"Syaoran?" She blinked as she alternated her views from my face to our hands joined together.
"I'm glad I met you." I smiled as I let go of her hands.
Sakura looked to the water and for a bit, she stared at our reflections. Then she looked back at me.
"I'm glad I met you too, Syaoran…" She said softly, "Without you here, I don't know where I'd be. I probably wouldn't have the courage to do anything… and we wouldn't be here right now."
"You really made me think. About everything. About me as a person and everything else in the world…" I stroked her cheek and moved her hair out of her face so I could get a clearer view of her beauty.
"I'm glad." She smiled.
"…Sakura, I… I love you." I finally said as I searched for her facial reaction.
She didn't look surprised, but instead she looked quite upset. She turned to the pond and looked down at the water.
"Thank you." Was all Sakura said.
A long silence followed after that. The faint sounds of the wedding reception could be heard from a distance, but this silence between us became more deafening.
I noticed that I heard something drop into the pond. I noticed because I saw the pond make small ripples that came from Sakura's direction. I knew then and there that she was crying. I didn't know what to do – why was she crying? I understood if she didn't like me.
"I'm sorry." I told her. "That's all I wanted to say, Sakura. I'm glad I met you… All I cared about was bettering my training and I didn't care about anyone else but myself… but you helped me see that I could actually come to care other people…. And… that's why I fell in love with you. That's all." I turned away to walk back to the reception. I knew that she wanted to be left alone.
She did not follow after me.
"Syaoran, where's Sakura?" Tomoyo asked as she saw me come back. "I saw you go out with her."
"She's still there." I said sadly.
"Did something happen?" Tomoyo tried to read my face.
"Not… really." I lied.
"Come on, spill it." Tomoyo glared.
"I told Sakura I loved her."
"Finally! Why do you look so glum if you just told Sakura that you loved her? And why is she all the way there?"
"I wish I could answer your question." I sighed. "I left her alone, she seemed that she wanted to be left alone anyway…"
"That's weird." Tomoyo said. "Don't worry about it too much, Sakura's been stressed lately anyway."
"About what?"
"She's still traumatized over Tomo's death." Tomoyo sighed, "Imagine. Even after he tormented her, she still feels so much guilt about it."
"It just shows how much of a good person she is." I closed my eyes. "That's why I love Sakura."
"That's why I love her too." Tomoyo smiled, "It's very out of character for Sakura to act this way… I'm going to have a talk with her later, alright?"
"Don't bother. I've troubled her enough as it is." I said.
"You're leaving tomorrow and you want to resolve this … unresolved?" Tomoyo said.
"I don't need Sakura to love me." I told Tomoyo, "I never wanted that. Of course it would be nice, but I wanted her to know how good of a person she was and that I do love her."
Tomoyo sighed, "Oh you two… and I thought you two would get a happy ending."
"Sometimes it's for the best." I said.
The rest of the night Sakura and I did not speak. She remained as an absentee for the whole reception. I tried to enjoy myself by talking to old comrades and to Eriol, while drinking a little bit at a time. I did not get myself drunk, but I did wonder what was going on in Sakura's head.
At least I got to tell her before I leave for tomorrow. That's all I wanted and that's all there is to it. I knew that we could never pursue a relationship together; it would just be difficult on both of us. We both were important people in two different times and places – a relationship between us would be unrealistic and impossible. I think she knew that, too. I was from Heung Gong and she was from Ling Shi. As much as I would love her to be mine, sometimes even are most fervent desires could not be realized.
xXxXxXxXx
Luckily I didn't have many things at Ling Shi. After all, I came here all by an accident anyway.
"You're so stupid, Syaoran." Tomoyo glared, "Of course we're going to see you off. After all, Eriol's going to be accompanying you to your homeland…"
"It won't take long, my dearest, I promise." Eriol said. "After I accompany Syaoran on this voyage, I will be back before you know it."
Tomoyo, Eriol and I were walking to the harbour of the island. It was rare boats and ferries came here, but for once there was one going to Heung Gong! How peculiar indeed. I didn't want to question it anyway. I was going home and that's what I wanted since I came here.
Yet I couldn't help but feel empty as I saw the huge boat floating on top of the water right in front of me. It was real. The moment that I had been anticipating for was finally here. I finally had the opportunity to go home.
A few minutes later, my old friends I made on the island came and went to say blessings and to see me off.
"You have to visit soon, huh?" Hui nudged me. "Ling Shi won't be the same without you, Syaoran."
"Thank you." I nodded.
"Hey, bud." Yamato patted my back. "This isn't goodbye, is it?"
"I'm afraid it is." I frowned.
"Don't forget us." Yamato's childish face went from that to serious. "Remember all the good times we spent together! Even if it was for a short while."
I remembered Yamato decapitating his brothers lifeless corpse. I shuddered at the thought but nodded with a smile. It definitely was a moment to remember.
I spoke to other people, but in the back of my mind, I was waiting for that one person to see me off.
"That's strange. Why isn't Sakura here?" Tomoyo wondered. "She said she'd be here."
"It's alright." I said. "I understand if she didn't want to see me."
"That's not right!" Tomoyo yelled, which caused her baby to start crying in her arms. Tomoyo tried to comfort her daughter and she frantically apologized to her crying baby, trying to calm her down.
"I see them." Eriol said.
From a distance I could see Touya, Yukito and finally Sakura walking down the pier.
"Hello, Syaoran." Yukito smiled at me. "We heard you're going, so we're going to see you off. Especially since you are one of Sakura's most treasured friends."
Sakura blushed at Yukito's comment.
"I see, thank you." I bowed. "It's a pleasure to be here and to meet you."
"Yes, thank you for helping us all out." Touya said. "You will be missed. You always have a place here on Ling Shi, you know that."
"Thank you for that." I bowed to him.
"You don't need to bow." Touya replied snarkily to my actions.
"Sorry."
"Be nice, Touya." Yukito scolded. "He was just trying to be polite!"
"Umm… hi, Syaoran." Sakura said quietly as Yukito and Touya were bickering in the background.
I smiled at Sakura, "Hello Sakura. I almost thought you'd never show up." I joked.
Taking this comment seriously, Sakura got defensive, "What? You think I'm that kind of person, Syaoran?"
"I'm just joking."
"Can we go talk somewhere quiet before you go?" Sakura asked shyly.
"Of course."
We found a quiet spot from the other side of the pier. We sat down on the edge away from the boat, looking out into the endless ocean.
"I've never been here before." Sakura admitted.
"It's my first time here that I can actually remember." I replied.
"I never thought I'd have to be here under these circumstances." Sakura's eyes started to well up in tears. "I thought I could come here when I can set off to have an adventure… not… seeing someone I care about go off forever."
"It's not forever." I tried to reassure her. Even I knew that was up for debate. Sakura could not be fooled as she did not respond to my statement.
"I'm really sad." Sakura said as tears streamed down her face. "You're leaving."
"It was going to happen eventually." I said sadly, trying to give her a dose of reality.
"I know, I know… but I didn't think I'd live to see it." Sakura responded.
I couldn't find anything else to say to that.
"You won't forget about me, right?" Sakura looked into my eyes. I saw my reflection in her own green eyes, her tears making it easy to mirror the outside world.
"Of course I won't, Sakura." I took her hand and squeezed it. "I don't forget women I fall in love with… especially if the woman is the first one I've ever loved."
Sakura started to cry harder after that. She buried her head in my chest and sobbed and sobbed. My shirt was getting soaked with her tears, but at this point I didn't care. I held her close to me, stroking her hair and her back. I rested my head against hers and kept her close. I will be here until she cried all the tears she needed to cry out.
Finally she stopped crying, but the sadness present on her face was unmistakable. She apologized profusely for 'ruining' my shirt. I assured her it was alright.
"Syaoran…" Eriol was walking around the pier to find us. "It's time to go."
"Already." Sakura said sadly.
I nodded slowly, looking at Sakura apologetically.
We both stood up together, but neither of us ever wanted the next step to happen. Sakura was holding tightly onto my hands.
As I was about to walk away, Sakura pulled me back close. She held me in her tight embrace, before looking straight into my face. Suddenly, she tiptoed to keep her head leveled to mine, and then before I knew it, I felt her face inch closer to mine; then she planted a kiss on my lips. It lasted for a few minutes – at first I was shocked and had my eyes opened, surprised at what had just happened, but then I let my body relax and go with it. I closed my eyes and kissed her back as I held her close to me.
We broke the kiss and we both looked at each other with such mixed emotions. We were happy, yet sad at the situation.
"Sakura…"
"Syaoran… I love you too." She said with more tears welling in her eyes.
"I love you." I held her tightly once more.
"I'm sorry I have to go." I whispered in her ear.
"I know you have to go." She said sadly.
We both walked back to the crowd of people on the pier, but this time we were holding hands. Tomoyo and Eriol looked at each other in delight at the sight of me and Sakura. Everyone else looked equally amused – except Touya, who looked straight up pissed off that I was holding his little sister's hand.
"So this is it, huh?" Tomoyo said to me.
"I'm sure we'll all see each other again." Eriol smiled.
"I hope so." Sakura said sadly.
"Promise us, Syaoran, that we'll see you again."
"…We'll see." I knew it was a promise I could not keep.
"I do promise I'll try whatever it takes to see you all again, though, somehow." I nodded.
Eventually I had to break free from Sakura's hold. She gave me a sad smile and both Eriol and I embarked on the boat. We looked out on the side, both Eriol and I waving to the crowd on the pier, which they all waved in response.
As the boat started to move I knew it was it. I was leaving now, for good. I don't know how or when I could ever come back, but now this was a journey back home – a long journey, but I knew I would pull through it like I usually did.
Eventually the island became less visible to the eye. Now it was just an endless blue horizon which spread out endlessly.
xXxXxXxXx
"Are you happy to be going home?" Eriol asked me as we sat inside the cabin of the boat. He was preparing us both a pot of tea.
"I'm mixed about it." I said sadly.
"Oh?" Eriol sipped his tea. "Why's that?"
"Don't act dumb." I glared at him as I kicked his leg from underneath the table. It caused Eriol to spill the hot liquid on himself.
"You were aching to go home when we first met."
"Things change." I replied sadly as I looked into my tea cup.
"Indeed, they do."
"I never expected myself to … get this far."
"You shouldn't doubt yourself, King Syaoran." Eriol mockingly gave a bow.
"I know I said that I would meet them again, but I'm not sure I could keep my promise to them. To Sakura. To everyone."
"So you think you won't ever see them again?" Eriol asked.
I decided now would be the perfect time to ask questions. I remembered the content of my dreams – how Eriol was supposed to be Clow or something. I needed answers.
"What was the purpose of this training?" I asked Eriol.
"What do you mean?"
"This spiritual training stuff."
"It's exactly what it means." Eriol said in a coy voice.
"My mother told me in my dream that Ling Shi is the past of Tomoeda."
"So is that what Yelan told you?" Eriol seemed so familiar with my mother, he even called her by her first name. No one called my mother by her first name unless they were really close.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"You're right that this was your spiritual training… I mean, if that was your hunch." Eriol sipped his tea.
"Okay…" I wanted more answers from this guy.
"It's not true, however, that Ling Shi is the past."
"Huh?"
"You cannot change the past. You cannot go into the past and change past actions. It's just impossible and time itself would collapse." Eriol crossed his arms together, looking up at the lamp that hung from above us.
"So… what are you saying?"
"Your mother simply… well, to be blunt, she lied to you." He nodded.
"Why would my own mother lie to me?"
"I know that your mother had used your dreams as a means to communicate… but… it was a different circumstance, you see. She cannot talk to you from the future to the past. Because doing that would be trying to alter the past itself."
"Then…"
"Ling Shi is very much in the present. We are in the same time frame, of course."
"That doesn't explain why my mother lied to me."
"After all, your mother knows you best. She knew that she needed to string a story, something you'd believe – something you'd act in desperation to change. By letting you believe that the current situation you were in was the past, she was able to manipulate you in a way to help you."
"What." I was in disbelief.
"Simply, she knew that you would not act the same if you knew that this was in 'the present', by presenting you with false premonitions and giving you hallucinations – I remember, she told me she said she showed you a vision of the 'future' or the 'present' of Tomoeda, which had Tomo Eda of Ling Shi sleeping… or something to that effect."
"Yes, she did."
"Well, Tomoeda is indeed real, but it has nothing to do with Tomo Eda of Ling Shi. The names are purely coincidental. I suppose we used it to our advantage to help you fulfill your training."
"Wait… so is this whole thing a hallucination?"
"Of course not. I'm real, Tomoyo is real, Sakura is real and the late Tomo Eda … they're all very much real."
"But what?"
"However Ling Shi is not in the same… I guess, realm, as your own world right now. But we are in the same time flow."
"Can you all lay it down to me? I am so confused." I tried to process all this new information.
"Alright, where would you like me to begin?"
"What the hell is Ling Shi…? No, wait, who the hell are you?"
"Alright. I'll begin with who I am. I'm exactly who you think I am, Syaoran Li. I am Eriol Hiiragizawa…"
"Is that all?"
"No." Eriol shook his head.
"Then continue."
"I am also known as Clow Reed – well, I'm not Clow Reed, but I am his reincarnation."
I sat there in silence.
"People can get reincarnated?" I asked.
"If you so desire. Clow Reed wanted to live on, even in his death. I guess there's still flaws to that… because I am not Clow Reed, but I am just an image of him. I am my own person. I am Eriol Hiiragizawa; but I still retain the memories of his past."
"…I see."
So Eriol was his own person but with memories of his past. How interesting is that.
"What would you like to know about next? We'll be here for a while so I might as well give you all the information you need."
"Explain again what is Ling Shi." I asked. "This place is real, right?" It'd really hurt to know if everything was just a fake. I know he said it wasn't, but I wanted to make sure.
Eriol nodded, "Of course it's real."
"Go on, then."
"Do you believe?" Eriol asked.
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"I asked you when we first met, remember? Syaoran, do you believe in faith? The after life?"
"It seems nice but it seems impossible at the same time. To live after you die."
"Is it really that impossible?" Eriol asked.
"What are you implying…" I said.
"Aren't a lot of things you've experienced… in retrospect, don't you think a lot of these things are also… well, impossible?"
I thought about it. A lot of the things I have gone through since meeting Eriol has become quite… well, fantastical. Surreal. I never knew you could talk through dreams and go through what I've been through. I sat there for a few minutes with my finger on my chin as I was reviewing and reflecting the past events of the past few months.
"Alright, everything is not impossible." I said.
"Then why do you dismiss the thought of the afterlife?" Eriol asked.
"I don't know." I really didn't.
"Well, I'll be happy to tell you that you were living the afterlife."
Silence.
"Wait… what?" I tried to fully articulate what I was trying to say. No, it was no use. I was dumbfounded.
"That's… impossible." I said.
"Or is it?" Eriol's eyes flashed in amusement.
"How?"
"Ling Shi literally means 'other world' in an ancient language…" Eriol looked down at his tea cup. Afterwards, he poured himself another cup. He looked back at me to scan for my reaction.
Was Eriol trying to tell me that I was dead and that Ling Shi was… the afterlife? Memories of getting to Ling Shi – meeting the girl, the Tomoeda Maiden, sinking to the bottom – what did it all mean? The more and more I thought about it and played it over and over mentally, the more it all started to click in.
"I-I'm dead?" I said, horrified. I looked at my hands and pinched myself. The pain was real. So was the pain when we faced Tomo Eda. I was in disbelief.
"You're not dead." Eriol reassured me. "But you're not alive, either."
"What…"
"Ling Shi is the place where you're neither dead or alive. At least, that's where the people who die go." Eriol sipped his tea, "When souls that feel like they have not accomplished everything they wanted in the world, they go to Ling Shi… of course, there are other places like Ling Shi, which is ruled by different people."
"I-I see…"
"Though there's different circumstances in which where, you do die, but it's purposely done."
"What the hell. Are you saying you and my mother conspired to kill me?"
"That's the essence of spiritual training." Eriol said.
I wanted to bludgeon Eriol then and there. I got up and cracked my knuckles, ready to hit Eriol in the head.
"Sit down." He demanded.
"You killed me!"
"Would you stop acting uncivilized and sit down!" Eriol's voice rose. It was scary because he was usually a calm fellow.
I sat down as asked.
"There's three ways you can enter Ling Shi: by death, by intent, or by creation." Eriol had to count using his fingers.
"Alright, I understand the death part." I grumbled.
"There's people like you who go into Ling Shi that were intentionally brought here by Clow himself."
"But Clow is dead, so how could anyone be brought in… intentionally?"
"I'm a reincarnation of Clow. Although I'm not Clow, I have the memories and the powers he possessed… especially since after … well, Fujitaka Kinomoto's death."
"Sakura's father?"
Eriol nodded, "Sakura's father was the other half of Clow's reincarnations. You see, Clow was such a powerful being that he needed to be split into two. Both his memories and powers were divided into an equal two… but… when one of his reincarnations dies, the powers go straight to the reincarnation which is alive."
"I see." We went off tangent but I was still interested in what Eriol had to say.
"Sakura's father and I… we did know each other and of each other's existence. Fujitaka Kinomoto predicted when he would die at Tomo Eda's hands."
"If he knew, why didn't he try and stop it?"
"That was an alternative – but either way, he only saw that with or without his death, he would've died eventually, and his daughter would be put in danger." Eriol took a pause to collect himself before continuing, "So he told me of his prediction. Now you may be wondering what this all has to do with you."
"Pray tell." I replied snarkily.
"Fujitaka Kinomoto and Sakura knew your mother, Yelan, very well." Eriol said, "Yelan also traversed through Ling Shi – or the spiritual realm, as part of her spiritual training. She met Fujitaka and Sakura a long time ago – when Sakura was just a little child. She already knew of Sakura's fate, as when Sakura was a little girl, she already envisioned this bleak future of what we have experienced in Ling Shi. Yelan wanted to help, but she knew she couldn't go back to the spiritual realm to help the Kinomotos and Fujitaka, so she knew the next best thing…"
"I was already born…" I whispered to myself.
"Yes, she knew already, at that moment, that you will one day be in the same position as her."
"I… I see."
"Your mother knew that if you knew all about this, that you would not do your best."
"Did she predict I'd fall in love with…"
"No." Eriol shook his head, "She did not. Neither did I or Fujitaka."
"The day you went to the Tomoeda ruins, you died. Syaoran."
"I see that now. I'm not gonna lie, it's kind of … well, I don't know how to feel about being dead and how my future was already planned out for me."
"Even so, do you regret anything that happened?"
"Of course not." I shook my head, "I've learned a lot here."
"You've grown a lot here, too." Eriol nodded, "People in Ling Shi, when they die… the people who already died in the living realm, when they die in Ling Shi, they ascend to either heaven or hell. In Ling Shi their existence is tested whether they continue onto the higher planes or if they shall continue living in the living world. They all come into Ling Shi, like you, thinking they got sent here by a ferry and that one day that they will be able to come home. For the people who do not want to come home, they continue living forward to Ling Shi until they too, die… and then they ascend to the higher planes – heaven or hell."
"So where is this ferry taking me?"
"Home, of course." Eriol said, "Back to Heung Gong. You've completed your spiritual training. You've mastered magic and you've recompensed for everything here in Ling Shi. You've saved Ling Shi."
"Was Tomo Eda… was he… dead?"
"Sometimes you get spirits who want to continue living but they do not want to leave. They do not die - so they end up in Ling Shi, and they commit evil. People like the Eda family … it was actually Tomo Eda's ancestors who died, stayed in Ling Shi, then eventually the descendants gave birth to the Eda's you saw in Ling Shi."
"So people here can reproduce?"
"Of course they can, you idiot." Eriol rolled his eyes, "You're really stupid when it comes to these things, huh, Syaoran?"
"Excuse me for not being versed in the afterlife." I glared.
Another thing was nagging at me, so I decided to ask.
"What was the purpose of the Clow Artefacts?"
"I knew of their existence thanks to Fujitaka Kinomoto's memories…" Eriol said, "Those artefacts bring stability into Ling Shi. If they were ever to be combined together, the power would be too strong it would literally collapse the foundation of the realm. That's why Clow purposely separated them, and we will continue to separate them as long as they are in good hands."
"Your staff is one of them, I remember my mother telling me."
"I will always keep it safe."
"I have one more question…" I stared at Eriol, which made him uncomfortable, I could see it in his face.
"What is it?" He tried to hide his discomfort.
"Sakura and Tomoyo… are they dead?"
"I was waiting for you to ask that." Eriol said. "The answer is no. They were created in Ling Shi. In fact, most of the people who are priests and priestesses in that temple are created in Ling Shi, they were always people of the spirit realm, and not the living realm. It doesn't mean they're not alive, because they are. It's just they were people born into this place and they do not know any better, really. In fact, the priests and priestesses have a greater significance in Ling Shi."
"What's that?"
"Their attempt to better people could hopefully influence people to do good. Eventually, once people die, they are judged and put onto the ferry to hell or heaven. Priests and Priestesses try to help people make good decisions and live good lives. Not many of the temple priests and priestesses know about their greater purposes because it'd be too overwhelming, so instead they just take the oath and live simply by trying to cause good onto other and living by a good moral code."
I smiled to myself. I'm glad Sakura wasn't suffering my fate. That's all I neede to know and I didn't press any further questions to Eriol. In fact, afterwards, all I did was sleep. I probably slept more than 24 hours – at least that's what it felt like. Then again, time in dreams goes a lot more faster than reality.
xXxXxXxXx
When I woke up, the boat was finally stationary. Eriol was not in the cabin like I had last seen him when I first fell asleep. I stretched and yawned, then finally I got up to see where we were at.
When I climbed up the stairs onto the deck, the sunlight was very strong. I had to cover my eyes.
I smelled the scent of the ocean and I listened to the sound of the currents and the waves as they forcefully clashed onto the shore and rocks. Eriol was standing at the edge of the boat and he was smiling at me.
I took a better look of my surroundings: the hills, the houses, the mountains! It was all so familiar – it was Heung Gong. It was home.
"So we're here." I said melancholically. Part of me didn't want to be here, but part of me was ecstatic.
"Welcome home." Eriol said.
The boat was already set so I could just climb down and run to the pier.
When I walked to the other side of the boat, where we would go down to the pier, I saw a small crowd of people waiting. I knew them, of course I did, it was my family.
"Syaoran!" My sisters all screamed happily in unison.
Yep, even after being gone for so long, I was still annoyed at the sound of their voices. I sheepishly waved back to them.
My mother and Wei were standing in front of the crowd. I questioned to myself how Wei got here – I guess when I 'died' in Tomoeda, he went back to Heung Gong per my mother's request.
"So, this is goodbye, isn't it, Eriol?" I looked over to my friend sadly.
"It's never goodbye." Eriol shook his head, "We will see each other again." He extended his hand to me. Instead, how very uncharacteristic of me, I locked him into a brotherly hug.
"You better." I said.
"I spoke to your mother already." Eriol nodded, "While you were sleeping."
"I see."
"All my business here is done… for now." Eriol said.
"Thank you for everything." I said.
"We'll keep in touch, I promise." Eriol laughed.
With that, I descended to the pier where my family was waiting. My sisters all ganged up on me to give me a hug, which sent my body to fall down on the wooden surface. Everyone was laughing and so glad to see me. They commented on how my aura had changed and how tall I had gotten.
I looked behind me and I saw that the ship was already setting sail. Eriol waved to me one last time before he turned away and I could not see him anymore.
"Syaoran!" I knew that voice. It was Meiling's. She shoved my sisters out of the way and flung herself onto me, attacking my face with kisses. I lightly pushed her out of the way.
"I missed you so much." Meiling said.
"I missed everyone." I simply replied.
"Ouch, that's cold." My sister, Feimei commented.
"Now, now, girls." My mother went to intervene. "Syaoran's been through a lot. Give him some space, alright?"
It was back to my old life.
Authors Note:
LOL. You'd all kill me if you thought this was actually the end. I can tell you, one more chapter (or maybe two... probably just one more) until the story is complete. I tried to explain everything as much as possible. I gave a little taste of SxS ... I mean this was an SxS centric fic, sort of, but it doesn't stop here. Anyway... enjoy the beginning of the end! Hehe. Any questions or concerns please don't hesitate to ask~!