Daryl shifted uncomfortably as he walked down the hallway. After the incident with condom, he hadn't seen Emma the whole night. So now he wondered as he walked to breakfast if he would see her there. And if he did see her what was he going to do. How was he going to act? In the moment he saw her there was a very good chance that there was another human being already beginning to grow deep within her. At least he thought it happened that fast. He stopped at the double doors to see Emma sitting with the kids smiling as she put food on their plates. A new thought entered the back of his mind.
"What kind of mother would she be?"
Which led his mind to another new thought.
"What kind of father would I be?"
She slowly looked up and caught his eye. He stared at her for a long moment before turning and walking off. His jaw clenched as he did. He knew he was going to pay for the dismissive action later. He also knew he deserved anything that came his way. Something big had happened to both of them last night. Something that would alter their lives more than any walker apocalypse. And he was leaving Emma in one of her greatest moments of need.
"You two okay?" Emma slowly looked to Carol as the kids ran off.
"Sure." She said and Carol tilted her head. "I have to go check on Lori and the baby it's been a few days."
"I'll come with, I need to learn this stuff." Carol said with a smile. "So Daryl walked off quickly." She said as they walked together out of the cafeteria. "You sure you two are okay… He kind of brushed you off."
"Sometimes he gets a lot of things on his mind, also we had sex last night and failed to put a condom on." Emma suddenly came to a stop as Carol stared wide at her. "I didn't just say that out loud."
"Emma are you okay?" She asked instantly her eyes wide not believing what she had just heard.
"I'm fine." Emma said looking to her before looking around to make sure no one was listening such as the loud mouth Glenn. "I mean I'm freaking out bordering on a complete melt down but I've cashed in that check already with Annabelle."
"Is there a chance you're pregnant?" Carol asked pulling her into an empty classroom.
"Of course there is I mean he came within me, deep within me." Emma said quietly. "I thought it was on, but he forgot, I should have made sure though."
"We shouldn't focus on blame."
"What should we focus on?'
"The fact that you may have a baby growing in your belly right now."
"Well more in my uterus."
"I am a woman I know how this works Emma…" Carol said with a smile.
"I take things quite literally when I'm nervous."
"Do you feel pregnant?"
"I think everybody does when something like this happens." Emma said looking off. "The thing is…" She shook her head. "Never mind."
"No what is it?" Carol asked.
"It's just… I'm not angry or sad I'm mostly scared… And curious."
"Curious?" Carol inquired.
"I keep having these little thoughts enter my mind." Emma said softly.
"Like?"
"Like… What kind of mother would I be, what kind of father would Daryl be… Who would the baby look like more…"
"Those are natural thoughts."
"It isn't responsible though to bring a child into this world… I mean Lori, I love her, I do, but I think she's a fucking idiot for having unprotected sex with both Shane and Rick. Now I'm the fucking idiot."
"Emma no." Carol said as Emma sat back.
"I should have been looking, I should have checked, what the fuck is wrong with me?"
"Nothing is, things like this they happen… Passion over rides the mind and you aren't thinking about a little piece of rubber." She said as she gave her a hug.
"I did everything I could last night to make sure it didn't happen… after I let it all drain out I used salt water and injected it into myself..."
"Jesus Emma." She said wide eyed. "Are you alright?"
"I've thrown my PH balance off a bit but women used to do this all the time and very few died from it…"
"That's dangerous Emma."
"So is an unplanned pregnancy during walker apocalypse." Emma said quickly.
"You have a good point."
"Hey." They both jumped as they looked to the doorway to see Lori her hand resting over a petruded stomach. "Everything okay in here?"
"Fine." Emma said with a smile. "Just getting ready to head your way for the baby."
"We can do it here if you like." She said with a smile.
"Perfect, there's a cot in the corner I want you to go back and lay back as I look over everything, Carol is going to watch me and learn just in case."
"Right." Lori said with a smile as she walked over. Emma smiled at the way she now swayed her hips.
-o-
Daryl sat on the mound in the baseball field. Luna sat at his side her head laying in his lap as he moved his fingers through her hair. The dog was calm, and he didn't know how when he was so on edge. All day his mind kept going to Emma, and what may or may not be growing inside of her. He kept having moments of his mind moving towards the future. He would sometimes think of teaching a little boy to hunt, or watching a little girl train in karate next to Emma, and that little girl looked just like her.
"Hi." He slowly looked up to Emma whose skin was illuminated by the setting sun.
"Hey."
"Can I sit?"
"Sure." She slowly sat down and pulled her knees to his chest. "I'm sorry I ran off last night I had to do what I needed to do to maybe avoid… Well… You know." He nodded.
"What did you do?"
"Things." She said with a shrug. "Things my mom told me women used to do."
"Are they dangerous?"
"Only a little, but I know that having a… You know…" he nodded. "In a world like this is a hell of a lot more dangerous."
"I'm so sorry Emma, I should have been-."
"The blame doesn't completely fall on your shoulders…"
"That's a peach of thing for you to say. Things like this though, they're my responsibility."
"It's my sex life too, and I should have been owning it better." He looked to her to see she was staring off before his eyes flickered down to her stomach.
"I keep looking down there too…" He looked back up at her in surprise. "Keep wondering, if there's… Something growing in there."
"Do you feel like there is?"
"Everyone does after an incident like this… It's simple maternal paranoia… We'll know for sure in two weeks…"
"That when you're next…" He cleared his throat. "Uhm…"
"Cycle is… Yes." She said.
"Do you know what the likelihood of you being pregnant is?"
"I'm afraid not." Emma said looking to him. "I'm sorry."
"No it's fine."
"Daryl I want you to know that if I am… There may be two ways out of it…" He looked to her. "I could run to a pharmacy and try and find some Plan B and take as much of it as I can… Or I can teach Carol how to… Abort it. I'd say Hershel but he's a biblical man and I don't think he would."
"Abort?" he asked.
"If you wanted."
"What about if wanted?"
"I don't have any feelings on it either way if it's wrong or not…" She said with a shrug. "I was taught it was wrong but I don't share those beliefs."
"Would you want it?"
"I don't know to be honest, I think I won't know until I for sure know I'm… Pregnant." The word cut through the air like a sharp knife. "Would you want me too?"
"It's your body your choice…"
"I know, but it would be yours as well…"
"I… I don't know." He said and she looked to him. "A part of me says abort it, a part of me says take the chance… I mean that way Loris little one would have someone to grow up with."
"I keep wondering what kind of mother I'd make." He looked to her quickly.
"I keep thinking what kind of father I'd make."
"Guess its natural… Look I told Carol." He nodded. "I needed advice."
"I understand." He said. "Would you want a boy or a girl?" the question came out so fast he didn't have time to stop it."
"Girl…"
"Me too." She slowly looked to him to see he was looking to her with a soft expression. "If you are, If you aren't, I'm going to be there with you whether you want to keep it or…. Or not." She nodded before looking back out at the sunset and taking his hand. Daryl wrapped an arm around her tightly and she leaned into him. "I love you."
"I love you too…"
-o-
For the next two weeks. Daryl saw very little of Emma. She had thrown herself into her group duties, and he understood why. He also understood that they were on good terms despite the fact that both their lives were either on the brink of changing forever or staying the same. Still he was counting the days until her cycle. It had been fourteen days. Two weeks exactly. She said in two weeks she was starting her cycle, and if she started that meant she wasn't pregnant. He kept trying to get her attention that day. Trying to ask her if aunt flo had made a visit. But he never got the chance.
Emma in those two weeks while immersing herself in group activities had become hyper aware of her body. Such as the spotting that had begun after one week. She knew that it wasn't a period. But she also knew it wasn't a definite sign of implantation by an egg. But when the spotting continued into her second week she began to wonder. Then she noticed the breast tenderness. Something she never had leading up to a period. Then on the fourteenth day after smelling a batch of powder eggs a wave of nausea had hit her like nothing else. She knew most women didn't have morning sickness in the early stages of pregnancy but she did know her mother did. And like her mother always said. The uterus of a young mother will follow that of the preceding generation.
Daryl had been trying to get her attention. She knew what he wanted to ask her. But she hadn't gotten her period yet, and the spotting had diminished. She began to make a mental check list as the days moved into her third week. She knew her breasts were starting to get bigger, and she had a small bloat that wasn't going away. Then the morning came when during her morning cleaning regiment she ran to the toilette and threw up anything and everything that was in her stomach.
"Emma you alright?" Maggie asked.
"I think… I think I just have food poisoning."
"I remember when I thought I had food poisoning in the morning… Ended up with this huge thing growing in me." Lori said with a smile as she looked down at her growing stomach.
"I'm sure Emma isn't pregnant." Beth said with a smile as she watched her mentor come out of the bathroom and start getting dressed. As she did Emma didn't miss Carol who was watching her closely.
"See you guys later…" Emma said as she walked out of the bathroom. She grabbed her bo staff and headed into the soccer field where Daryl and T-dog were working on killing a few walkers who had broken down one of the gates. She twirled her Bo in the air before slamming it across the head of a walker and then poking another threw the eye. T-dog and Daryl stood back as she leapt into the air and kicked one across the face before twirling and landing another kick to its chest knocking it to the ground before stabbing it through the eye. Daryl shot the Walker through the head which was coming up behind her fast.
"We need to talk." She said grabbing his hand and leading him off.
"Thank you!" T-dog called.
"What did she say?" he turned to see Carol.
"Nothing just that they needed to talk… You look good today Carol." She looked to T-dog.
"Oh uhm… Thanks." She said with a smile.
"Scarf looks good on you, knew it would." She smiled even more. "Wanna take a walk?"
"Sure." She said instantly forgetting about the drama with Emma and Daryl.
"What's up?" Daryl asked. "Did you get it?"
"No." She said as she started to pace the bell tower room.
"You didn't… Get uhm… The visit from aunt Flo?"
"That's a really awful thing to call it Daryl." She said wheeling on them. "God can't you just say period or menstral cycle or…" She stopped. "I now am having mood swings… Great Add that to the list…"
"What list?"
"My breast hurt and they're bigger, I have a slight bloat that won't go away, I can smell everything, and I'm nauseated."
"What does that mean?"
"Pretty sure it means I'm pregnant Daryl." She said. "All the signs point to that including the spotting during the time of implantation."
"Implant?"
"The egg to the uterine lining…" She said.
"So… You're pretty sure you're pregnant."
"I would need a test, but yes."
"I have one." He said.
"Have what?" she asked.
"A pregnancy test, I got a few I figures it was smart seeing as we were having sex and so were Maggie and Glenn."
"Very smart…" She said.
"Want me to get you one?"
"Yes." She said quickly.
"Alright come on." He said taking her hand instantly. His heart was beating faster than it ever had. Emma was sure she was pregnant, and when Emma was sure about something, she was usually right. They got to their alcove and he took a pregnancy test box from his bag. Emma expected him to just hand it over but he tucked it into his jacket and they walked far from the bathrooms and to another set at the other end of the school. They got into the girls bathroom and he handed her the box. "I'll be right here."
"I can't pee with you in here." She said.
"What?" he asked.
"I have a shy bladder Daryl…" She muttered quietly.
"Fine… I'll be outside." He walked out and leaned against the door. His mind was blank in that moment. He couldn't even bring himself to think. After what seemed like forever he heard the door behind him open.
"It's time…" She said and Daryl wondered how long he had been standing outside. He slowly headed into the bathroom and walked over to a sink where a small plastic stick lay. She slowly picked it up in hand and looked it over. He couldn't read her expression. He didn't know if it was a yes or no. Not even when she handed it over to him and walked away.
"What does this pink plus mean?"
"I need you to get me a jug of water."
"What does this mean?"
"Daryl the water please."
"Emma-."
"It means I'm pregnant okay!" She yelled and he slowly looked to her. "Just get me the jug of water I'm going to take the rest of them, I need to make sure." She was pacing her arms wrapped tightly around herself. "I need to make sure."
"Here…" he pulled a water bottle out from behind him. She slowly took it in hand. "I'll get more but start on that." He walked to the door.
"Daryl…"
"Yeah?" he looked over his shoulder.
"Thanks…"
"No problem…" he quickly walked out and ran from the room. As Emma downed the water in the bottle she looked to the door where Luna was poking her head in. She went into the bathroom and closed the door another stick in hand. She couldn't believe this was happening. Couldn't believe her life had taken this turn. When the walker apocalypse went down she never thought she would get pregnant during that time. In all honesty she hadn't thought she'd make it a year into the epidemic. After doing her business she came out of the bathroom the stick in hand to spot a jug of water sitting on the sink. She walked over and grabbed it and began drinking it. The dog made a small scared noise and she smiled softly.
"It's okay girl… I'm okay, I'm sure that one test was just a fluke."
-o-
Daryl sat back against the door. It felt like hours since he had first seen that little pink plus sign. Hours since he found out it was likely Emma had gotten pregnant. That he had gotten her pregnant. In all honesty it had only been one hour. Still time was moving so fast. His mind was moving faster. He had a million thoughts and this time unlike the morning after the condom slip up, he was catching every single thought.
What happens now? What are we going to do? What do we tell the others? How do we prepare for a baby? How will we deliver it without her? Can Hershel handle it? What if something goes wrong? What if Emma gets sick? What if I lose her? What if I'm the same kind of father my old man was? What if I can't curb my anger? What if I can't protect Emma while she's carrying my child… My child… Baby… My baby… Our Baby… He heard a small noise and looked over his shoulder towards the door. He slowly got to his feet and moved forward into the bathroom.
"Emma?" He stopped seeing her curled up in the corner Luna held in her arms as she sobbed. He didn't even check the four pregnancy tests laying on the floor. He knew what they said in that moment, and he didn't care they said yes. All he cared about was Emma. "It's alright." He pulled her into his arms as the dog laid it's head on her knee.
"This is so fucked up…" She said wiping tears away. "I'm not ready for this…"
"We'll do whatever you want to do…"
"I don't know what to do."
"That's alright… Take a few days…"
"It's going to take longer than a few days… if I do what I think I should do, what I think I have to do I'll have to wait a few weeks maybe a few months until it's bigger and easier to… Get… Get rid of." Her stomach turned and she ran to the toilette. Daryl rushed to her side and pulled back her hair.
"You don't have to do anything you don't want to do… Like you said it could be weeks before he have to do anything, you take that time to think…" He flushed the toilette as she pulled away and fell back against his arms. "It's alright…" he said rocking back and forth slightly. "You're going to be alright…"
"So many things can go wrong…" She said shaking her head. "So many things… I can't control it… Not any of it… I can't even control my body."
"Shh…"
"What the hell am I going to tell the others Daryl?"
"You leave them to me…" He said.
"If I take care of it, they can't know, half of them don't believe in it."
"Then we'll wait."
"I can't hide a pregnancy Daryl."
"Not on your own…" he said. "But maybe you should tell Carol so she can help us." She slowly nodded as she sat up and looked to him. Daryl cupped her cheek as he looked her over. "You're going to be alright, I'm going to make sure of it." She slowly moved forward and wrapped her arms around him. "You're both going to be alright…"
"Both…" She said softly her hand slipping to her stomach.
"Whatever you want to do… I support it."
-o-
The night they found out Emma was pregnant. Daryl held her close to his body the whole time as she stared up at the ceiling, in what seemed like shock. For the next few days she was very quiet. But Daryl had started to see the signs of pregnancy. Her breasts had gotten bigger than they already were. There was a small bloat to the lower part of her abdomen. Small but obvious. Every morning she calmly snuck to the bathroom at the other side of the school to get sick. Then at morning she refused to go near the eggs.
She had started to stray from her duties, unless for the kids. She still taught them karate and English. But when it came to patrolling or helping hunt. She was nowhere to be found. Except for Daryl who would find her in the library with medical books on pregnancy spread out in front of her. He didn't push her on the subject of what she wanted to do. He himself tried not to think about what he wanted her to do, because in all honesty he couldn't believe what he wanted her to do was.
He sat down around the fire and to his surprise Emma joined dinner for the first time in days. She sat down at his side and he pushed a plate of food towards her. She shook her head at it and pushed it away.
"You have to eat…" he said softly.
"My stomach is a mess…"
"Anything I can help with?" Hershel asked and they both looked up.
"Uhm no…" Emma said.
"Where you been Emma?" She looked to Rick. "Haven't seen you in a while, not at least out on patrol…"
"Teaching the kids."
"Been hunting at all?" He asked and she looked at him for a long moment.
"No…"
"Kind of been slacking off haven't you."
"Uhm-."
"She's been reading pregnancy books to get ready for your kin to come." Daryl said with a tone that Rick wasn't used to. Emma looked to him surprised he had defended her so quick. "She's doing her part for the group."
"Right…" Rick said and Daryl looked to Emma who was smiling softly at him. He took her hand under the table and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
"I'll take watch tonight." She said and Daryl looked to her for a long moment. "I'll go now and relieve T-dog."
"Sure." Rick said as he watched her get up and leave. Daryl quickly got up and followed her out.
"Are you crazy?" He asked.
"What?" She inquired.
"Emma you haven't eaten in a few days and what you do manage to eat you throw up the next morning." He said. "You're not fit to take watch."
"I'm fine."
"Emma…" He pulled on her hand stopping her from walking.
"Daryl-."
"You're pregnant." She looked around.
"Say it louder why don't you, I don't think the walkers outside heard you…"
"You don't know if you're going to keep it or or not but while you don't know maybe you shouldn't do things that could harm it… What if a walker knocks you down, what if it gets you in the stomach?" She looked him over. "Let me take watch."
"No you've taken watch the last few nights you need to sleep."
"So do you, I've checked in on you at night and you haven't been sleeping…"
"You've been checking in on me?"
"On… Both of you." She took his hand and led him into the alcove.
"Alright… I need to know something and you need to be honest…" He nodded. "Do you want this baby?" he stared at her for a long moment.
"I want you to be happy."
"What do you want Daryl?"
"I don't know…"
"What do you think of this pregnancy?"
"It's unplanned…"
"And…"
"And… I don't… so much mind it." He said and her eyes widened. "Look I never thought I'd have any kin of my own… Before this whole mess happened I didn't think any woman would be crazy enough to shack up with me longer than a few minutes in a bathroom stall."
"Whoa Daryl, really nice image…"
"Then this whole mess did happen…" He said ignoring her. "And I thought no woman was going to shack up with me because they'd all be dead or trying to rob me or already married with kids… Then you came along, and you're perfect." She looked him over. "You're funny, wicked, and…" His voice trailed off. "You were crazy enough to give me a shot… Now you've got someone growing inside you…" his hand slowly reached for her stomach. "Who is just as funny, just as wicked, and perfect, and somewhere in that boy or girl is a little part of me… I can't help but look at you and think… She's carrying our baby…" His hand set on her stomach and Emma's eyes drifted closed. "It's only been near five weeks and I'm already so attached…" Her eyes slowly opened to see he was looking her over. "I want this… But if you don't I understand it…"
"I want it too…" She said softly as a tear rolled down her cheek. "I want this baby too." Her hands moved over his which was still resting on her stomach. "I've wanted it since the second I found out." He rested his forehead against his. "We're having a baby…" She said softly and he couldn't help but smile. "I'm a little scared…"
"I'm going to be there every minute…" he said and she smiled softly.
"When do we tell the others how do we tell-."
"Leave them to me." Daryl said.
"I can't believe this we just got together and we're already going to be parents… Are things supposed to move this fast?"
"I guess for us they were meant to." He looked her over. He could tell she was scared, could tell she was freaking out, and he didn't blame her one bit. She was nineteen years old, newly, and pregnant. Not to mention the kind of world they lived in wasn't the kindest to pregnant women. Her chances of survival over the next nine months just went down severely. "Hey…" he cupped her cheek. "Look at me." She slowly raised her eyes to his. "This… This is going to be fine." He said looking down at her stomach. "You're going to be fine. You're both going to be fine. I'm going to make sure of it. I'm going to take care of you, take care of both of you."
"You shouldn't have to…" She said.
"I want to…"
"No you don't."
"Yes Emma I do… The way I see it… This lil' ass kicker growing inside of you." She smiled. "It's one of the best things I've ever done… One of the only good things."
"Daryl you've done plenty good."
"Not as good as this…" She looked him over.
"If you change your mind in the next few weeks, you let me know and I'll start making preparations."
"I'm not going to change my mind…" he said and she slowly nodded.
"Neither am I…" He moved forward and wrapped his arms around her.
"We'll get through this, together…"
"You're a good man Daryl…"
"Good for you…" She smiled softly as she held onto him tightly.
-o-
AN: Don't freak out me this shit happens lol, no but seriously just hold on for the ride, it gets good. Usually I hate what I write and I'm loving what's to come so, hold on it's going to be bumpy.