And so the trio set off to find the Sandship.
"Are we there yet?"
"No, Master Groose."
"Are we there yet?"
"My calculations point to no."
"Are we there yet?"
"There is a 0% chance we're there yet."
"Are we there yet?"
"According to my analysis, no."
"Are we there yet?"
"My observations indicate that if you say it again, a sword is headed straight up your-"
Before Fi could finish, the boat smashed into something, big, heavy, and invisible. A giant ship appeared before them, almost out of nowhere.
"Hey Mr. Skipper, I think I found the boat!" Groose said gleefully.
"Yargh, when did you realize that, laddy? When we smashed into it!?"
"Yeah! You must be a physic!"
And so, the trio, er, quartet formulated a plan. Groose would go inside to find the flame, and Fi would check the controls and try to stop the ship entirely. That would give them access to the ship's controls, and she could disable the lockdown mechanisms. The captain would be in charge of taking back his crew, and Link would explore the front part of the ship, while keeping a lookout for pirates. The final plan was agreed on, and so they boarded the ship.
"So all of you know your roles in the plan?" Fi asked.
The hero, the sidekick, and the robot, who also was more or less a hero by pirate standards, all responded with "yes".
"Groose, are you sure you know?" Fi questioned him.
"Yeah, I just have to find the flame, right?"
Fi tried to clap for him, but then she realized she didn't have hands. Oh well. She floated up onto the ship, and passed through the wall. First, she just had to find a central map. Then, she could mentally transmit it to everyone through her magical mind powers. Fi pondered why she didn't exploit this more as she searched the ship.
Groose and Link climbed the ladder, with the Skipper in close pursuit. As they reached the top, the Skipper couldn't help but notice something.
"Yargh, if I be steppin' out of me timeshift stone's range, then I be shuttin' down, me harteys!"
"Oh, I can fix that!" Groose said. Pulling out a small chunk of timeshift stone that he grabbed when nobody was looking back at the shipping bay, he jammed it into the Skipper's empty eye.
"Ow matey, I'll be makin' ye walk the… wait… this is great! The expedition is proud to have a buccaneer like you on crew!"
"I try my best, sir."
Link, growing ever sick of this recurring praise, decided to go stand guard somewhere else. He entered a door towards the front of the ship.
"Okay, I think we best be on our ways." Skipper ordered, and exited the deck through the same door Link exited.
And so there was one. Groose now stood alone on the deck, wondering what he was supposed to do again. Something about a flame… did Fi want him to set fire to the ship? No, that didn't make sense. Pirate ships float in water, so they can't burn. Yeah, so then there was one. Groose took a few steps and observed his environment. There on the ground lay several skeletons. The ground, in actuality, was made up of long wooden planks, masterfully laid one after another. Almost everything on the ship was colored a worn brown, probably from years of service. This ship had probably seen a lot in its days, but it was still holding up quite well.
Before Groose could finish admiring the ship, a voice popped into his head.
"Now downloading… …Please hold." a robotic Groose voice echoed in his head.
"Whoa… what the hell is that?" Groose said to himself as he stumbled.
"One percent downloaded… two percent downloaded…" it echoed.
"Oh goddess, why…" Groose said as he sat down against the mast of the ship. This might take a while.
"Stupid idiots… thinking they're better than me… I could have thought of that in a second." Link griped to himself. He walked in circles inside the room. After the skipper had passed through, he just kind of stayed there. He didn't even have a real job! That was stupid. He kicked a barrel over, and pulled the sword off his back. The least he could do was find something to kill.
He opened the door opposite of the one he entered. He now stood on the bowsprit of the ship. Out on the tip was an unknown figure. Link could only make out the silhouette of him.
"Show yourself!" Link yelled to him, as he readied his sword.
The figure turned around to reveal a shard, spinning hook and two long swords. He took one in hand, and created some sort of robotic snarling sound.
"Friend or foe?" Link yelled to him.
He didn't respond.
"Dude, who are you?"
The robot screeched again, and cackled robotically to himself, "WHAT'S IS that guys even his PROBLEM?" The robot's grammar module had obviously been damaged throughout the years, leading to this abomination's words.
"Ok, that's it, I'm just going to hit you."
"Bring it on, chumpstick!" it shrieked, and began speeding towards the boy. Link did the same towards the robot, and the two met in a clash of swords. Link was sent flying backwards, and skidded to a stop. The robot began to spin his hook, and leapt at Link. He rolled out of the way, and the pirate's hook struck the wood with a crack. He ripped it out, along with a good chunk of the deck. Link raised the sword above his head, and jumped at the robot pirate. He caught it with his hook, and took a swing at Link using his sword. Link jumped on the sword, and kicked the pirate's stomach. He fell backwards, releasing a set of electronic screeches.
"Fifteen percent downloaded… sixteen percent downloaded…"
Fi had finally found the map after phasing herself through a couple walls. She found the control room, and sent the map telepathically to everyone. She then established a connection with the Skipper with a screen she found in the control room.
"Ah… here we go… all systems shut down… ok… and… good." Fi said to herself. She looked up at the screen, and saw the ship through Skipper's eyes. "Skipper, all defensive mechanisms in the ship have been disabled."
"Good, I'm on my way to the brig now. That's where they should be held. Chances are that me ship's wiring has been deteriorating over the years, and me ship's mechanisms may be a wee bit offline."
"Okay Skip, good luck. I hope I did something." Fi said as the screen logged off.
She looked around the room, happy with the current situation. Groose was still downloading the file, and due to his small brain size, it was taking a while. Link was busy scouting or whatever, and the Skipper was almost done with his mission. After that, she could have Groose waltz right in, and complete his part of the plan. And then, she woul-
"Oh my Goddess. That's not good. That's not good!" Fi began to freak out.