Chapter Twenty Five –Insults and Injuries

Disclaimer-Most of these characters belong to JK Rowling, I'm just borrowing…

As soon as Severus got up with his birth chart, he heard Potter come over to Lupin and ask him what he was doing at the Slytherin table. When Severus turned the corner, he leaned back to see if he could hear anything else.

"Nothing, he lent me a book over the hols and I needed to give it back to him."

"Lent you a book? Wasn't Dark Magic was it Remus?" Potter asked.

'What if it was!?'

"No, no, nothing like that, he's really not that bad, you should talk to…"

"I have no desire, he's proven that he is a dark wizard by the hexes he's put on us. Hey, wait a minute, he lent you a book? So you two hung out over the hols?" Potter said.

Severus heard nothing but assumed that Remus nodded most likely.

"Did you let that slime ball into our room?" Potter asked.

Shit.

Again he heard nothing but assumed that Remus told him the truth.

"Ah come on man, he is the one who put the bed bugs in our beds then!"

"What? James, no, I was with him the entire time and never saw…"

"What you never left his side, not for a second? Not even to use the loo?"

"Well I guess I did but I doubt he put a hex…Look. I've never heard of a bed bug hex," Remus said.

"That's because Remus you are not a dark wizard and he is! That was dark magic!" Potter nearly yelled.

"What are you lot going on about?" the voice of Sirius Black said.

"This mindless buffoon let that greasy git Snape into our rooms over hols and that's why we got bed bugs."

"You let that Snivellus grease-ball sleep in my bed? No wonder we got bugs James, must have leapt off his nasty body and onto our clean beds so they could get away from him."

"No, Sirius, James, no. He never slept in the room, and he never touched your beds and I doubt he put a so-called bed bug hex on your mattresses."

"What's the problem?" that annoying Pettigrew asked.

"Our buddy Lupin here let that sack of shite Snivellus come into our rooms over the hols and that's why we got bed bugs now." James said with total conviction.

'Well he was right of course…damn it!'

"Oh Lupin, how could you? Now I have to burn my sheets." Pettigrew said. "What the hell were you doing with him anyway? He's a creep!"

"He's a slimy creep," Potter added.

"Now now, wait, hang on, it was just Remus and that slimy creep here over the hols, Remus was probably desperate right? Bored out of your mind?"

"Um, yeah Sirius, that's what happened."

"See he doesn't really like the greasy git, he was just so utterly bored he had a lapse in judgment and started actually talking to that wickedly ugly asshole oddball," Sirius added.

"Sure, yeah…but I still don't think he…"

"No Remus, you don't think, clearly you don't. You are forgiven, but I trust he won't be back in our rooms again?" James asked.

"No, of course not, no," he heard Remus say.

The voices were getting closer so Severus just moved on and worked his way down the dungeons and into his own Common Room.

It's a good thing Remus told them that they were not real friends; imagine what they'd do to him if they found out? They'd probably beat the tar out of him or worse! Severus wouldn't be able to live with the guilt if Remus was beaten up over his friendship with Severus, better to just keep it a secret for now.

The next few days nothing of significance happened other than a bat-bogey hex that Black threw Severus's way in the corridor and a retaliatory toe-nail growing hex Severus threw at Potter, who happened to get in the way of Black. Heaven help the day all the two or three of them gang up on him at once.

--

For Lily's birthday Severus drew her another picture, this time of Hogwarts, the tiny unicorn just peering out through the edge of the Forbidden Forest. He gave it to her early that morning, before she even had breakfast. As soon as he handed it to her he turned to see Black and Potter standing before him, wands out.

"So it seems someone likes bed bugs!" Black said inching closer to Severus.

"You piece of filth, coming into our rooms? You think we wouldn't know it was you?"

"You deserve worse Potter, both of ya!" Severus shouted, summoning his own wand. Before he could even think they both said the incantation for the 'fur charm' and Severus was covered from head to toe with black, greasy fur. Severus was so shocked that he dropped his wand. Then Pettigrew showed up from behind him and cast a 'Furnunculus'charm, as hot and oozing boils suddenly erupted all over Severus's body.

The students who witnessed this were beginning to laugh but Lily was not one of them.

"Oh my God you sick prats! Come on Sev, lets get you to the infirmary," Lily said taking his furry hand into hers. Before he left he heard Pettigrew scream as his hand burned from touching Severus's wand, now back again on the floor. Severus reached over and got it himself and went with Lily to the infirmary.

"Stay out of our rooms you greasy bastard!" Potter yelled.

Severus was irate but embarrassed more than anything, not to mention itchy and very irritable now.

"What were they talking about?"

"I went to their rooms and put a bed bug hex on their bed over Christmas hols," he said as Lily covered her mouth with her hand to hide her laugh. "I see you laughing, despite my now abnormally long bangs."

She giggled again, which sort of cheered Severus up, but not much.

"Shit, fuckin' shit," he said, stopping his pace.

"What? I know it hurts but come on…"

"Fuck, one of the boils is up me arse okay, bloody hurts like fuckin' hell to walk and don't even think of lecturing me on me language, I'm furry and…"

"…have a giant boil up your butt, yeah I understand and no, I'm not lecturin' ya. You wanna stay here while I get Madam Pomfrey?"

"No, we just need to slow down some, that's all. You're gonna be late, I know the way."

"No I won't leave ya, besides those prats may come back, and I want to kick them in their arses if they do!"

"Feisty!" he said, trying to walk through the pain. But it really hurt and each step he took grinded and pressed up against the boil strategically placed only a few millimeters from his anus. "This is like a hemorrhoid from hell!"

"What's a hemorrhoid?" Lily asked.

"It's a vein that pokes out of your arse when you get old and it hurts like hell, me…dad has them," he said very quietly, not wanting to mention his father much.

"Wow, I wonder if there are magic spells or potions for that, I never want a vein coming out of me butt!"

"Yeah, there are, I offered to brew him some but he'd never let me, so the son of a bitch suffered instead, fuckin' idiot Muggle…and when I get me hands on Potter and Black…"

"Stop it Sev!" Lily said with great force. "I mean it, ignore them and they'll go away, look you are even right? Please stop, for me birthday, make it me birthday present okay? Ignore them please?"

He thought about it for a second or two, the new boil he could feel pressurizing and throbbing on his balls was definitely not helping in his desire to honor Lily's request. Not to mention the fur was itching and digging into the boils as well. He was not in an agreeing mood.

"I'll think about it, I may have lots of time to think in the infirmary," he said, scratching his butt.

"No Sev, don't scratch! Come on," she said, yanking on his oozing and furry arm.

When something resembling a black and greasy Yeti entered the infirmary, Madam Pomfrey nearly fainted.

"I thought I'd seen it all, and what is that smell?" she asked.

"Oh, Potter and Black cast a boil charm on him too, so his boils are oozing," Lily offered.

"And festering beneath this mass of greasy fur, very well Miss Evans, you may leave, he will live!" she announced, helping Severus onto a bed. She closed the curtains around the bed and left.

When she came back she had a potion vial…and a razor.

"Um, what's that?"

"This is anti-boil potion, and this is a razor for some of the harder to reach spots."

"Harder to reach spots?" he asked in a terrified tone.

"The fur spell will wear off in three hours, but since you have boils, I need to remove as much of the fur from the spots where the boils are manually. I'll use this razor as close to the wound as I can. Naturally there is no fur on the actual boil, just around the base and I'll need to remove the fur for fear of infection. So please remove your clothing, Mr…well it is Mister isn't it? I can't tell who you are."

"Snape," the pillar of black Yeti said, not that she could even see a mouth.

"Poor deary, remove your clothing sweetie, you are covered in fur so I won't see, come on now, don't be shy! I've seen naked bodies before you know."

"Not twelve year old ones covered in fur you haven't," the mass of hair said.

"You think you are the first to have been hexed with this one? No Mr. Snape, nor will you be the last, off with them, now!" she said trying to rush him.

He complied and had to admit he felt a tad better without the constraints of clothes pressing up against the festering wounds. He lay down on his back on the table and watched with horror as she came over with the long straight blade, which reflected the sunlight back into his fur covered eyes.

"I think I'm going to faint," he said.

"No, take this potion, it takes several hours for all of the boils to close up and go down, now then, tell me where are the most painful ones?"

Fuck no!

"Um, one on top of me foot," he said raising his right foot.

"Ah there, there, I see," she said, carefully and calmly shaving the fur around the wound and applying a topical anti-bacterial cream to the tender boil.

She did the same for the one on the small of his back, his inner and outer thigh, his elbow (that one was particularly painful) in-between his fingers, on his chest just beneath his left nipple, his jaw, right smack at the end of his overly large nose and…and he left it at that.

"Are you certain this is all? If there are others that remain untreated they will become infected and you may lose that body part."

He could live without his asshole but he thought his testicles may come in handy one day.

"Um, well there is one…no, two more…"

"Where Mr. Snape? I promise it's nothing I've not seen before."

"Here," he said pointing down to his nether regions.

"Where exactly or do you want me to hunt for it?"

"On me balls okay? Right in the middle of the sac all right?"

"All right Mr. Snape, I know this is embarrassing and painful, I assure you I'm only trying to help you sweetie," she somberly said and slowly moved his legs apart.

He sat straight on his back and looked up at the plain ceiling and tried to think of anything other than what was happening. He was still a young boy and had felt an occasional hardness in his gonads a few random times but he was still nervous and did not want to officially begin puberty in Madam Pomfrey's gentle hand. He tried to think of the most benign, most pointless, most boring thing he could possibly imagine as she took his penis into her hand to move it to the side so she could access his testicles. Quidditch!

Quidditch was good, he thought all about that lame book his great uncle bought him, and about the few practices he'd seen from the window of the library. He thought about the seekers and the snitch and the quaffle and the beater and the crowd. The crowd…the crowd…the crowd full of Hufflepuff's! A mass of yellow and black, like bumble bees all over the Quidditch pitch…

"Done and the other you mentioned?" she asked, interrupting his daydream of an all Hufflepuff clad crowd.

"Um, well, me bum."

"Oh well that's easy," she said with a huge smile, helping him onto his stomach.

"Well it's not on me bum, it's sort of in me bum."

"Bloody hell," she said to his surprise. "You poor thing, you deserve your sweets tonight!"

He laid on his stomach feeling more embarrassed than before even. This was going to be the single worst moment of his entire life thus far.

"Okay, prop your cheeks apart with your hands and I'll do…what I need to do and don't comment, just bloody do it!" she commanded.

Shit.

He did as he was told and felt her cut and slice into a part of his body he himself had never seen and always imagined no one else would ever as well…boy was he wrong.

She finally got through the fur and applied the cream, which offered him instant relief.

"Those open sores need to breathe so I'm keeping this curtain drawn, I want you to lay on your side, both legs bent at the knee and pushed up to your chest as to allow air to flow into your bum, and the other affected areas for the next two hours. I'll give you a calming draught so you will be more sedate."

He took the draught and lay in the humiliating position, still oozing and still furry and any pleas that Lily had were quickly out the window.