"Where the fuck is Merle?" My fuckin' brother was gone. An so was that black girl. I knew what he did. He took her like Rick asked him to. He took her to get rid of her an try to save our asses. But I knew what was gonna happen to my brother an I knew I had to go after him an save him. Couldn' be lettin' him be dyin' when I just got him back.

I ran to the first place I could think of. I ran to Jesse. She was down in the tombs, hollerin' fer Merle too. I knew that mornin' she said she wanted to talk to him 'bout finally gettin' out of his cell 'stead of bein' in there all the damn time. She had her back to me when I got up on her an I grabbed her real quick. Her hand came up fast wit a knife an I had to grab her fer she did me some damage.

"Jus me, Jesse, jus me."

"Daryl, have you seen Merle? I've been looking for him for about an hour now and I can't find his dumb ass anywhere."

"Jesse, that's what I gotta talk to ya 'bout. Merle took Michonne to the meetin' wit the Governor. I gotta go after him. I talked to Rick. He knows I'm goin' an I couldn't leave without tellin' ya. Had to say bye 'fore I go."

"You're going to where the Governor is meeting?"

"I gotta. That's where Merle is an that's where I gotta go."

"Daryl…"

"My brother, Jesse. Ya'd do the same fer Johnny an I gotta do it fer Merle. Ya can' be askin' me to stay. Don' be askin' that a me, please. Ya know I'm gonna do my best to come back, right? I'm gonna try my hardest to get back fer ya. But I ain' makin' no promises."

She stared at me fer what felt like forever 'fore she asked, "Do we have to start taking it slow all over again?"

"What?"

"Are you taking us through the steps again? Do we have to start at kissing and work our way up?"

"Guess not but…"

She stood up on those tiptoes an her mouth crashed down on mine real hard. She was everywhere all at once. Her hands were up my shirt an her mouth was on mine an she was pressed up 'gainst me all tight. I tried to slow her down. I said, "Jesse, we didn' get to the third one. We gotta…."

"Daryl, shut up. We're accepting the reality that you might not make it back. I'm not letting you go without some memory of us together. Please. Five minutes."

"Ya need this 'fore ya will let me go?"

"I need this."

I grabbed her then an yanked her shirt up over her head. I didn' know a lot 'bout takin' care of a woman but I was gonna give her what she needed. Seemed like seconds 'fore we were both stripped down to nothin'. Seconds 'fore her lil legs were wrapped 'round my waist an I had her pinned 'gainst that wall. Was tryin' to keep her real quiet an not hurt her but when I got inside her, was like nothin' else that ever happened to me 'fore. God it was good an she was moanin' in my ear an I knew I wasn' gonna last long. I knew I couldn'. There was nothin' inside a me that could hold on when she was whisperin' my name like that, beggin' me not to stop, beggin' me never to stop. Her voice was all high pitched an 'bout to be screamin'. Then her lil hand reached down an started movin' on herself an her breathin' got faster an real light an I could feel her squeezin' 'round me an I just let go wit her. She bit down hard on my left shoulder an I buried my face in her shoulder an we both just slumped 'gainst each other real hard.

"I shoulda done that right," I growled as I pulled outta her an put her down on her feet. She leaned heavy 'gainst the wall an tried to breathe. "I shoulda taken care of ya an been slow an careful wit ya."

"Next time," she whispered. "Next time, you'll get to do whatever you want."

"Might not be a…."

"There will, Daryl. There will be a next time. Go find Merle. Smack him upside the head for me and drag him back here."

"I'll do my best to come back to ya. To ya an to Lil Bit. Don' be comin' after me. Keep yer ass here an do whatever Rick tells ya to do."

I yanked my clothes back on real quick an she kissed me 'fore she pushed me towards the door. She whispered, "Don't say goodbye to Arlene. I don't want her worrying about you while you're gone."

"If'n I don' make it back to ya, ya will tell her that I love her?"

"Always."

"He's still not back."

"You can't go after him, Jesse. We need you here. The Governor could attack at any minute. You have to face the fact that if Daryl isn't back by now it might be because…"

"Don't. Just don't." I glared at Rick. "Daryl Dixon is still alive, and I'm just going out there to hurry him along. He and Merle are tough. Johnny will watch Arlene for me. I know you plan on staying and fighting, but if you have to run, I can track you so don't worry about leaving me behind. I'll find the group. Don't worry about me."

"Jesse, we need all the help we can get here. I can't let you go after him. Michonne said that he told her not to send anyone after him. Now, I know you don't want to face it, but it sounded like Merle was going on a suicide mission and it doesn't sound like Daryl is far behind him."

"Look, Rick, I told my daughter two days ago that that man is her father. She's lost one dad and I'll be damned if she loses another. I'll be back in three hours. I'm going to go say goodbye to my daughter."

I turned and walked away from him. I didn't feel near as calm as I sounded. Daryl was gone. I didn't know if I was still running on the high from the quickie in the tombs or if I was just scared, but I was ready to do something. I couldn't leave him or Merle out there. They were a fucked up part of the family now and I knew that I'd do the same for any member of the group.

On the inside of the block, Johnny was pacing with Arlene on his hip. He was walking a lot better. In Rick's plan, it would be Johnny and Hershel with Beth, Carl, and Arlene. I knew he hated not being part of the action and I knew he'd hate what I was about to tell him. I called out softly, "Johnny."

His head snapped towards mine and his green eyes raked over mine quickly. Without hearing what I had to say, he commanded, "No, Jesse. I know what yer gonna say and the answer is no. Ain't lettin' ya go out there after those rednecks."

"You don't have a choice, Johnny. I just came in here to say goodbye. I'll be back within a few hours. Before it even gets dark."

"Ya can't do this, Jesse! I know ya think ya care 'bout that redneck out there and I know ya didn't get the chance to do this with Eric, but ya can't make up fer it by doin' it now. Ya got Arlene to think 'bout."

"And we have this group to think about."

"Jesse, it's always been us 'fore the rest of the world."

"It can't be like that anymore, Johnny. I'll be back in a few hours."

I took Arlene from him and kissed her on the cheek. She asked, "Gonna get Papa Daryl, Jezze Momma?"

"Yeah, baby girl. I'm going to get Papa Daryl. Be good for Uncle Johnny while I'm gone."