"Dr. St John!" Cuddy exclaims, bursting into a patient room and freezing Rose's stethoscope in mid-air.
"With a patient?" she offers weakly, grimacing before she turns around to face her boss, knowing full well what her exasperated tone is about.
"Please tell me you know why there's a lecture hall full of doctors waiting to see House?"
Rose pulls the stethoscope from her ears and straightens it around her neck carefully- biding time before answering.
"You did tell him that you didn't care how he hired a team," Rose points out, replacing the sheet over the patients lap and leading Cuddy out into the hallway.
"So what is this then? A game show?"
Rose sighs. The other woman's analysis is much closer to the truth than she cares to admit. "You wanted him to hire a new team. This is how he's doing it. Unless you want it to take twice as long... I prefer to choose my battles wisely so this week I'm covering a doctor on vacation in Wilson's department."
Cuddy glares at her for a few moments longer, finally relenting with a large sigh. "This better not go on any longer than two weeks, and so help me Rose if anyone dies…"
She nods in understanding, rubbing the back of her neck and rolling her eyes once Cuddy turns her back to walk away. In truth, once House admitted his reluctance to narrow things down from the forty applicants she'd provided, he had actually been relatively responsible in planning how this contest was to go.
In spite of that, Rose had decided very quickly that she wanted no part of the front-line shenanigans, and instead had promised House that she would supervise all of the candidates' case work from the side, to make sure no medical errors occurred, and ease everyone's apprehension about the whole thing.
She makes her way to the lecture center, surprised to see House pacing back and forth in front of the door. Wilson stands to the side carrying three coffees and looking annoyed, checking his watch every few seconds.
She raises her eyebrows at Wilson, who shrugs and rolls his eyes dramatically.
When House sees her, he stops pacing and leans against the wall, attempting to appear nonchalant.
She cocks her head at him. "Whats up? Cuddy said they're all in there."
"Figured I'd make them wait some- no reason to give them any false expectations that I'll be on time."
The joke falls flat and Rose smirks as Wilson scoffs over her shoulder, knowing full well House's reluctance has nothing to do with punctuality.
"Want me to warm them up for you?" she offers, a well calculated casual tone to her voice.
Thankfully, House plays along and agrees, just barely managing to hide his gratitude behind a dramatic ushering gesture.
"Be my guest."
HWHWHWHW
Rose strolls into the lecture hall, walking in front of the long wooden desk and stopping to face the crowd. The forty young doctors fall silent and look to her eagerly. She takes a deep breath and begins to speak, an aire of ease and confidence pervading her presence.
"Good morning.
"I am Dr. Rosemary St. John, the co-head of diagnostic medicine here at Princeton Plainsboro Teaching Hospital. Dr. House should be here in a few moments, so I'd like to take this time to prepare you for what lies ahead.
"To start, I want to congratulate you. The fact you're here means that you are already some of the foremost minds in medicine that the world has to offer. I have reviewed all of your CVs and was extremely impressed with the pool of applicants for these three fellowship positions.
"That being said, this will be the longest job interview of your life.
"At the end of ten days, only three of you will remain. That means that after today, and the two following, ten of you will be fired, and then one each day for the remaining seven. It is my sincere promise that these next few days will be the most challenging in your careers up unto this point, and well, well beyond it.
"Some things you should know:
"Firstly, House walks with a cane, accompanying a chronic pain problem. So do your best to ignore the pill popping, don't pity, and don't ask questions.
"Second, Doctor House is unorthodox, to say the least. He's one of the most rude, crass, sarcastic, and moody people you'll ever meet, and your behavior will have to change at the drop of a hat to meet his demands.
"As you get through the next few days, you're going to see that House's views of people and the world as a whole differ greatly from yours and mine. Because of this, he will offend you. Period. None of you will escape being picked apart and poked at- nearly viciously sometimes. But know that through his prodding, he is testing not only your medical skill, but also your resolve. You will quickly realize that this job isn't only about the medicine.
"His methods are some of the most unique you'll ever see-sometimes bordering on insane, and almost always within the realms of questionable ethics. He will shock you, he will demand things of you that your training has not prepared you for. Understand that you are all experts in your field on normal patients. But if these patients were normal, they wouldn't be coming to us.
"House operates within the theory that once you exit the realm of normalcy, rules become bendable. Breakable. Hippocrates wouldn't be able to imagine some of the things you'll be asked to do. You'll be tested in ways that you will often consider unfair, demeaning, and illegal. And you will often be right. But know this, House is very rarely wrong.
"You're going to feel like he won't take no for an answer, but House doesn't hire people who will bow to his every whim. He hires people who will stand up for what they think is right. If you find the need to challenge him in any way- and you will- you'd better stand your ground and have proof. He'll ridicule you for it, but not nearly as bad as if you back down. He's not going to fire you for keeping him as much on his toes as he requires of you- in fact, he might even respect you for it.
"As well, you'll be doing all the grunt work, including the things nurses and technicians would normally do. You'll make the majority of contact with the patients and report back to House. The three who end up getting hired will see how I fit into the equation, but for now you aren't afforded that buffer. That said, I will be supervising casework from the sidelines, for the sake of patient safety, and if you truly have a problem, come to me. My door is always open, and I will be your advocate to House. Keep in mind though, that while you will be alone with House for the majority of this time, I hold more power than you think, and being on my good side will be a blessing later.
"Ultimately, what is going to get you hired here is how laterally you can think. Do not pluck fruit that any person off the street could reach. Stretch high and stretch wide. The branch that supports you the longest- the theory that stretches the furthest- is generally the correct one, no matter how forbidden or golden that fruit may seem. Here in diagnostics, we're in the business of looking for zebras, and Occam's razor rarely applies.
"You will be challenged to exert all of the knowledge you possess here, more so than you ever have before. I can guarantee that there is no better place to learn and to practice. If you work for it, you'll learn more in a day than years of education have taught you, and even a day with House is one you won't be forgetting anytime soon. Give him your best, all the time, and you won't regret it.
"Lastly, above all, ladies and gentlemen, House values loyalty. Stand by your patients, your teammates, and him, and he will take the heat for you should things come crashing down. He will be your greatest ally if you prove you deserve his trust and respect- and trust me, those things do not come lightly. Do not give less than your best, be prepared to work harder than you ever have, and good luck."
Rose's words hang heavy in the air for a moment before House enters the lecture hall with a wicked smirk on his face. He slings his arm around Rose's waist, pulling her towards him and kissing her hard on the lips. Giggles and gasps sweep through the room as House holds onto her for just a moment too long.
"Establishing dominance much?" she hisses, trying not to laugh.
"I like to start my days with an odd sexually charged feeling," he answers, waggling his eyebrows and passing her a cup of coffee from the tray Wilson had set on the desk. "Besides you made me sound like a stick in the mud."
Rose rolls her eyes and leaves the room with Wilson in tow. The pair walk to the elevators, sipping their coffee.
"That wasn't dominance you know," Wilson says, gesturing to Rose with his cup. "That was respect."
She squints. "How so?"
"You just gave an incredibly effective speech about respecting him… and obviously calmed his nerves about the whole thing. He was practically blushing purple while we were listening in the hallway Rose-" he cuts off then, eyes wide. "Don't you dare tell him I told you that."
Rose laughs, walking to the cafeteria with Wilson and sitting down to have some modicum of breakfast before beginning their oncology rounds. She waves her hand to absolve him as he continues.
"Anyway, he wants to be sure you get your bit. Make sure they know not to mess with you, either. It's… protective."
"It's unnecessary, James."
He shrugs. "Maybe. But it's not something I ever thought I'd see. House establishing someone else as boss…. You must be a goddess in the sack."
Rose swats at his hand, sticking out her tongue. "You missed your chance to find out about that two years ago."
He laughs, taking a bite of his muffin and smiling goofily at her across the table.
"Doesn't it bother you not to have a say in who he picks though?" Wilson asks then, sobering.
Rose shakes her head, smirking. "I already had my say."
"Picking forty from a hundred is hardly equal input, Rose."
"James this game he's playing… he's using it as a security blanket… to make sure he doesn't make the wrong choice. All the things I said in my speech- critical, lateral thinking, intelligence, patient advocacy, and team loyalty, willingness to challenge standards…. They're qualities of good doctors. Damn good doctors. I spoke to all of them, read their applications. I know which ones are the three best doctors of the bunch. I don't need to play games."
Wilson looks on, incredulous, a bite of muffin halfway to his mouth, frozen in mid-air. "You can't possibly know who House'll pick… House doesn't even know that yet."
Rose's smirk turns into a wicked grin, mirroring House's own only minutes earlier. "You wanna bet?"
HWHWHWHWHWHW
Despite the fact that House has only one doctor left to fire to declare the winning three fellows, his lecture hall is more packed than on the first day of his game. A massive betting pool had formed amongst the staff- once the shenanigans of House's candidates had reached all corners of the hospital over the past ten days- and everyone from janitors to board members pile into the room, awaiting his final announcement.
Rose and Wilson stand to the side on the stage, neither having been allowed to participate in the staff bets for fear of insider information. They had made their own wager with each other, several days earlier- $200 plus a month of House's meals and three months of designated driver status.
Rose's picks- hastily scribbled on a cafeteria napkin ten days earlier- are folded away neatly in the breast pocket of Wilson's lab coat. His hand is glued to his neck as he and Rose watch House, perched against the desk with a casual aire that they both can see straight through.
After a few moments, House straightens up slowly, clearing his throat and leaning heavily on his cane as the room falls silent.
Wilson produces the napkin as House begins to speak, his voice sounding tired and resigned.
"Kutner. Hadley. Taub."
The room erupts as soon as House finishes, and he allows his weight to fall back on the desk, glancing over his shoulder at Rose and Wilson.
Wilson peers down at the napkin in his hand, mouth agape. On it, in Rose's crisp script: Remy Hadley. Christopher Taub. Lawrence Kutner.
"I'll be a son of a bitch…" Wilson whispers, refusing to meet Rose's eye. She grins ear to ear, practically floating.
HWHWHWHWHW
"Hey wait up!" Rose calls as she exits Wilson's office, half jogging to catch up with House, who heads towards the elevators at a surprising speed.
He peers down at her tiredly as she reaches him, and she doesn't bother to hide her concerned look at his white-knuckled grip on the cane.
She walks closer than normal, hovering on his right side and allowing his ribs to brush over her shoulder every few steps as his leg heaves with effort on their way to the parking lot. He settles into the passenger seat of her car without a word, not giving so much as a passing glance to the motorcycle, parked a few spots away.
HWHWH
When they get home, House makes a beeline for the bathtub, leaving Rose to call for food and wander into the bathroom a few minutes later, two beers in hand.
Normally one to let him alone in the bath, House watches with hooded eyes as Rose undresses, gingerly stepping into the water and settling down between his legs slowly, mindful of the right thigh. House takes the offered bottle gratefully and slumps further into the hot, soapy water, stress visibly melting off his face as he wraps his arms around Rose's waist.
"New day tomorrow, huh?" she says, groaning quietly as she leans back against his chest and takes a long pull of her beer.
He nods slightly, drinking as well and sighing quietly. "I take it from Wilson's shocked face that you won the bet?"
She smirks, chuckling. "Three for three, and chosen on the first day."
House glances down at her, furrowing his brow. "You knew who I was going to pick from the beginning?"
She shakes her head, looking back to him and smiling softly. "Nah, I just knew which three were the best doctors."
He takes another swig of beer and looks back down to Rose, whose face is written over with a look of knowing admiration that nearly makes him blush. She wisely stays silent, finishing her beer and tracing circles on his arm with her fingertips as they both relax in the steamy room.
House closes his eyes, smiling to himself with relief at the knowledge that she'd paid attention and silently confirmed his choices- that he'd apparently chosen well. He rests his chin on her shoulder, savoring in the weight of her body pressed securely against his.
He'd never admit it, but the thought of being wrong, of making a mistake and hiring someone who couldn't do the job was utterly terrifying.
He'd never admit it, but he also knows he doesn't have to. Somehow, she always knows.