A/N: Whoo.
Disclaimer: Er... I suppose I've said this one too many times now, but I dun own the Naruto series...
"So... what're you getting?" Tenten asked, gazing at her menu five minutes later.
"Hn... I dunno..." Neji grunted, not really in the mood to converse with another human being.
"Here you are!" Lin, the waitress, came over to the table and set a live baby llama on the table. Tenten and Neji stared at her.
"But we didn't..."
"Oh! It's from them over at table three!" Lin pointed to a table not too far from theirs. There sat the Akatsuki: The Leader, Itachi, Deidara, Sasori, Kisame, Zetsu, Tobi, Hidan, Kakuzu, and Yura.
"Neji-kun?"
"Yeah?"
"Half of the Akatsuki are dead..."
"Yeah..."
"So then why-"
"I don't know..." Neji and Tenten blinked at them, clearly wondering what was going on. They then looked back to the llama who was currently munching on Neji's head.
"Neji-kun?"
"Yeah?"
"There's a llama eating your head..."
"Yes, Tenten. Yes, there is..."
With that being said, silence fell between them. All that could be heard was the munching from the llama. Soon enough, the llama got bored with Neji's head and laid down on the table, glaring at the Hyuuga with an intense hatred.
"Ahem..." Neji cleared his throat, obviously trying to break the awkward silence.
"So... You hungry?"
"Tenten."
"Yes?"
"A llama was just chewing on my skull... do you really think I am hungry?"
Tenten stared at him.
"Well... yeah..."
Neji glared at her, then at the llama, then back to Tenten.
"You know... I don't like llamas very much..."
Tenten was then staring bewildered at him.
"You... don't like... llamas?"
"I don't like llamas..."
Neji then got up and went over to the booth where the Akatsuki were sitting. He pushed Itachi further into the booth and sat down on the edge. All ten members stared at him.
"Yo..."
"Why are you here?" Deidara asked, completely bewildered.
"You sent me a llama..." Neji growled.
They all stared at him.
"What llama?"
"That llama..." He pointed to the llama sitting on the table, who was now eating (literally) Tenten's fork.
"That's not a llama..." Sasori pointed out.
"Eh?" Neji raised an eyebrow. "Seriously, I think I'd know a llama when it chews on my head..."
"No, really. It's one of my clay sculptures..." Deidara pointed out. Neji blinked.
"Your clay sculptures eat human heads?" The Hyuuga gasped.
"Wh-what! N-no! Ahaha... Why would you think that?" Deidara gave a nervous laugh. Sasori sighed.
"So obvious..."
"NEJI-KUN! THE LLAMA IS EATING MY CLOTHES!" Tenten cried out pitifully. Neji spun around and ran over.
"Oh, dear Lord! How do I stop it...? Aha! I know! OH ITACHI!" Neji called. Itachi came over.
"What?"
A chibi (about the size of you're foot) Sasuke ran through the doors of the restaurant with a giant mallet (normal sized, actually...).
"DIE DIE DIE!" Sasuke squeaked, pounding Itachi's foot. Neji picked Sasuke up by the collar of his shirt with two fingers and put him close to the llama. The Chibi Uchiha was now hitting the llama, who crumpled into broken clay.
"NOOO!" Deidara crawled and ran over to it. "CUT DOWN IN ITS PRIME!"
By this time, everyone was staring wildly at the Akatsuki, Neji, Tenten, the demolished-clay-llama, and the chibi Sasuke, who was still pounding the air furiously with his mallet. Tenten grabbed Neji.
"That's our cue to leave..." She whispered. Neji dropped the chibi Sasuke and ran away with Tenten.
TEN MINUTES LATER!
"Hey, Neji-kun?"
"Hn?"
"Are you still hungry? You know, I'm a great cook!" Tenten giggled, blushing lightly.
"Does this mean I'll be in your home?"
"Yeah..."
"Okay, but as long as you keep Neji away from me..." He felt awkward saying his own name to describe a gueni pig, but had to make the statement, nonetheless... Tenten laughed.
"Okay, silly! Oh! Why don't we bake something! We could do it together! Umm... how about he make a layer cake? Oo! What about brownies!"
"Tenten-chan... I'm not really much of a baker..."
"Oh c'mon! If Emril can be famous doing it, so can you!" She growled and tugged him away. The entire time, he was wondering who Emril was...
"Alright! Let's see our possibilities, shall we?"
"I guess..." Neji grunted as Tenten opened up the part of her pantry where all the baking mixes were.
"Okay... We have brownies, fudge, sugar cookies, chocolate-chip cookies, white cake, several layer cakes, funfetti cupcakes, and leek-flavored bars!"
Neji looked at her, confused by that last comment.
"Leek...flavored..."
"Yeah! You gotta be healthy sometimes, you know!" Tenten giggled. "Okay... anything you wanna make particularly?"
Neji shrugged.
"Alright... then I guess I'll choose..." The weapons mistress scanned them, her expression concentrated. "Hmm... no... too many calories... hn. I dunno how to make a layer cake..." She was about to go with the cupcakes, but the her favorite cookie caught her eyes right before she said so. "OH! NEJI-KUN! LET'S MAKE GINGERBREAD MEN AND WOMEN!" She gasped. Neji blinked.
"Eh?"
"C'mon! You can make a Tenten one and I'll make a Neji one!" She giggled, getting out all the supplies. There was no escaping this time. Neji was going to make a Tenten gingerbread woman.