Stolen Hearts Chapter Twenty-Four
Vegeta's eyes squeezed shut but he refused to give voice to his suffering. They would never have the pleasure of knowing what pain they were causing him. Let them try all they wanted; he would only reward them with contemptuous silence. Yet the fact remained that they were killing him, slowly, and with a sick pleasure.
It seems there was no goodness left in the world, even in the supposedly goodly Fey people. What had he done to deserve such a hell? He grimaced and his eyebrows made a horrible scowl as the devilry was twisted again. Perhaps he did deserve this, his past way far from clean, but that was not what this punishment was for, this punishment was for the one thing he felt he had done right in his life, the one thing that was true and good, this was for his love.
Was he really delusional though? Was the Princess really better off without him? These over-zealous executioners belief in that was certainly enough to sway him to believe it was not the strangest idea on the planet. He had been a hopeless dreamer, that was all, and now he would pay the price for it. He would pay the price for being weak just like his father had said.
'Was Bulma even upset at this change in events?' he thought, beginning to be delirious through the pain, 'If she was upset she would be here wouldn't she? She would not allow this to happen, for she was a Valkyrie of all things.'
Although Vegeta wasn't perfectly clear on what that was he had seen her powers himself and knew no army could stop her, let alone simple palace guards. So where was she? As much as he hated the idea of having to be rescued, he hated the idea of being ripped apart by Fey executioners even more. His hair was matted and smeared with his own blood.
Bulma felt as if she was being torn apart, while Vegeta actually was.
Perhaps they had succeeded in changing her mind? He always felt that she never needed him as much as he needed her. She had a home and a family, and he shouldn't have ever tried to take that from her. Their bond was fresh, it might be easily broken, and she was a faerie after all. He knew of no other elf who had ever attempted to bond with a faerie so how could he assume the bond would be the same? After three days of this hell it seemed a tangible possibility in his pained mind that he had been indeed forgotten.
But even with this thought, he could not be angry with her. She was right to leave him behind; it would be folly not to. He had been the fool, a fool to believe he could have her in this world or any other. Maybe he should have killed her that day they met, but that thought twisted him more then the torture.
He loved Bulma. It was a fact he could never deny, even if that love did make him weak and led to his demise, it was worth it. It was worth every second of it, and he wouldn't change it for anything. They could take his life, it meant little to him anyway, but they could never take away his love. You are who you love, not who loves you, and he was grateful for what little time he had with her. Bitterly grateful yes, like someone who was allowed to taste the sweetest nectar only to be told they would never be able to have it again, but still grateful even if everything after that taste would mean nothing.
He was completely ready to give up when something old surged within him, something in the nature that had been beaten into him absolutely refused to be so dishonored by dying in the enemies' dungeon for an imaginary crime. He was a warrior, he was strong, he was ruthless.
Only now when he realized his love was gone did he begin to remember that with a fierceness that could never be contained.
Vegeta's heart turned bitter and his blood boiled. He would not die because he had been foolish enough to trust his heart with a faerie. He had to escape! Even if it was only to die trying, so be it, at least he would die on his own accord. Slowly but determinedly he wrenched his bloody torn hands from the binding cuffs and hurried to release the ones on his feet before the inquiring guard came.
Vegeta was able to ignore the pain with his adrenaline pumping and was free before the guards came to investigate the noise. By this time Vegeta was free and they were choked to death with the same chain that once held their prisoner captive.
The taste of death was sweet again to Vegeta and he felt the power of darkness flow through his veins once more. Not one of the guards made it out of that dungeon of sickly smelling blood alive. Only after the walls were painted red and nothing in his path was left breathing did Vegeta allow his pain to catch up with him. He reeled feeling very light headed from the loss of blood and weak from his tortured limbs.
'No not yet, I can't collapse here..'
He grimaced and continued his escape; freedom was too close for him to die now in these horridly close and unforgiving walls. The air that reached him when he crawled through a small window at ground level was refreshing and pure, giving him some small amount of peace to his troubled body, however, his departure held neither escape nor peace for his heart that had unfortunately resurfaced through his blood lust.
The moon came out and a shaft of its pale light spilled onto him. He lifted his nose and inhaled deeply as if gathering sustenance and conviction from the moonlight.
He would have liked to think that it was for the best as he turned to leave, but the raging pain in his heart forbid him to do so. Maybe he should go to her, but he couldn't. His heart was too full of farewells and it was better this way. It would seem she had no desire to see him anyway, lest she be tempted again.
You must understand the intolerable amount of pain Vegeta was in to make him think this way. Nothing was clear to him, all he had were bitter, pained, and misconstrued thoughts placed in his head by the executioners, and those horrible thought were warped into reality as he was tortured. It was the only thing that could've made him believe she did not want him anymore.
But moreover he now truly believed she was better off without him. She was a Valkyrie, and belonged with her people. He had to leave. He had to leave by himself. It was and always had been fate's design, inescapable. He could not trap Bulma into this, for it was obvious that he was not what she needed nor deserved. She deserved more then a future of rotting away with him in the corner of oblivion. He would not make her make that choice.
So he walked away, he walked away from the one place he wanted to be and every pace was torment. With a condemning finality his footsteps fell, and that singular sound echoed in his heart forever.
He turned stiffly and began to pace in silence down the long road, his future closing about him as he went. He walked steadily, without haste, looking straight in front of him and as he entered the forest, the look of endurance was already on him even when his heart was filled with a secret dread. What was there for him now?
Bulma's eyes fluttered open only to obstinately close again to escape the garish blinding light.
Was she dead?
The quick and acute pain that shot through her assured her otherwise. Other then that pain everything else was a blur of incomprehensible thought and feeling. Bulma took a deep breath and forced herself to open her eyes again and focus on the world around her. There were large white bandages on her wrists that were luridly stained red in places.
What were these wounds from?
Slowly, like a seeping tide, her memories came back to her with a groan and she sank down motionless in stony grief, lifeless as stone, and her heart like a stone within her. Only her silent tears flowed and would not stop. She thought maybe she would turn into a stone which forever, night and day, would be wet with tears. It was raining again, and the rain splashed in her heart and ran like sadness down the window into her soul. Why was she still cursed with life?
"Glad to see you're up," Chichi said cheerfully when she entered, not realizing her friend's crying at first because of its silent nature. Bulma was still crying, slowly and hopelessly for her wounds had weakened her.
Chichi sat beside her broken friend and stroked her hair comfortingly, waiting with wise patience for Bulma to find herself. It was something Chichi knew she couldn't do for her; she could only offer Bulma support. After a time Bulma's sobs reduced and then finally stopped, maybe only from lack of energy but at least now she could find her voice.
"Chi, what happened?"
"Well I heard the terrible fuss you were making and I got so dreadfully worried and went to look for you. When I found your door locked I went a little crazy I guess with fear, and well, I'm sorry, but I broke your door. It was only to save you though!"
Chichi's continued innocence was appalling. Bulma shook her head. Perhaps Chichi believed some monster had made these cuts on her wrists as well.
"I never thought I'd live to see you break down a door... I guess I almost didn't."
"You sound disappointed."
"Why shouldn't I be?"
"Bulma, you have much to live for!"
"I have nothing. There is no point in me living if he does not," she spoke without emotion, as a person already dead.
"But-"
"No, Chi, no rationalizations. I know this in my heart. You have no idea what it is like in here. I'm sorry but you wasted your time saving me, I cannot stay here, I will die even without the aid of a knife."
"Do you really think he would want you to give up?"
"It is not about wanting Chi, I CAN'T. My heart has nothing left to beat for, it is too worn and ragged. It cannot keep up the day to day struggle of life without collapsing."
Bulma let out a miserable choke as her strength left her and she collapsed limply again, looking like death indeed had come upon her.
"Bulma... it kills me to see you like this," Chichi said in a quiet tone of disillusionment that made Bulma's heart clench tighter. Has she ruined Chichi too?
"Don't worry about me. Forget me all together, it is for the best."
"It is not for the best for anyone!"
"Well they should of though about that before they slaughtered the man I loved with everything I had!"
"Would if I had only known I would have stopped them. It was a poor choice and everyone regrets it Bulma, they do. But people make mistakes, and the past is the past, we must carry on with the present or the future will be nothing."
"Ha, a poor choice," Bulma seethed with ultimate bitterness, "What a wonderful way of putting it. If you only knew how the past could haunt you Chi you would not be so quick to say such things. Maybe if I was a plant change would be easy, because plants don't have memories. Memories you can't run away from."
"Your mother would change the past if she could. She hates herself for what she did, she just didn't know Bulma, she didn't know-"
"She is not my mother, and I hope she rots in seven hells for what she did whether she regrets it or not."
"Well killing yourself is not a way to punish her, it will accomplish nothing but adding to the chain of grief. Live well, that is the best revenge. Rise up and show the world that you will not be beaten!"
"But I don't know how. Don't you see? I became nothing when I heard he was dead! I am nothing, an empty shell. And what do you think my life will do if not add too the chain? My past has proved that well enough, so why not death?"
Bulma looked desperately at Chichi with eyes that seemed to contain all the sadness of the world.
"No one can tell what the future holds."
"I do not care to ever find out."
"You have to!"
"Why?!" Bulma demanded angrily, tired of Chichi's insistence. Her words would not change anything. That caring, it will never come to any good, people wouldn't let it, it was simply not in their nature.
"Because Bulma... The doctors found something else when they were examining you. I wasn't supposed to tell you because you are in an "unstable" state or something, but I think you ought to know. You ought to know what you have to live for."
"Well," Bulma replied unenthusiastically, nothing could change her mind, "I'm waiting to be shocked."
But shocked she was.
"You're pregnant Bulma."
With that sentence reality crashed back around Bulma with a frightening blow that left her sitting simply absorbing this strange idea that she was actually capable of having a life with-in her. After all these years of barrenness…….how?
"Impossible," she stated, disbelief being the easiest and most reasonable path at the moment. She was barren, it must be some mistake, or maybe a trick to keep her alive, she thought bitterly.
"It's true Bulma. Can't you feel it? You are a Valkyrie, you may not look like it but it's still there in your heart. You will be able to tell, just concentrate... I should leave you to rest now, I trust you are stable enough be left alone. I believe in you Bulma, I always felt you could do anything."
At that she exited with a smile leaving a perplexed Princess behind to contemplate the new change in her life alone. Suddenly Bulma had no time to think of herself and her wish for death.
The most important question burned in her mind. Who was the father? She was aware of the amazing fact that she was pregnant now, for if she did concentrate she could feel it. But who? It couldn't be Yamcha's could it?
No...no.. that was impossible. She felt it. It was Vegeta's, it simply had to be. Somewhere inside her she knew, that night they bonded they had created something together, something no one could ever take away from her.
Her tears began to come again as she wrapped her arms securely around her stomach and began to rock slightly. She had a piece of him left; he wasn't gone from her completely. This child, this wondrous miracle of a child would be everything to her, her only beacon of light, her only hold on sanity. It was no hardship for her to live for his child, it was an honorable duty. Her most important duty in the world, and she would not fail. Both her love and the flowers were gone and never to come back, but she would have her child and that would be enough. She had a purpose again.
But living came with so many other problems and responsibilities.
'What would they do if they knew it was Vegeta's child?' Bulma though in a rush of panic. Surely the child would not receive the same fate as the father? She fell to actual tremors considering this and clutched her stomach tighter as she let out a violent sob of anger mixed with misery.
No. No. No. She would not fail.
But she had failed Vegeta. Who was she to think she could do it right with their child? What would she do? Leave? No, that would not be safe. Plus she didn't want her child, the heir to the kingdom, growing up worrying for his life in the harshness of the wild. Life was harsh enough already without adding to it. She wanted him to have the life she had never known. She wanted him to have everything, and she would sacrifice herself to do it.
She would marry Sir Yamcha and claim the child was his. As long as the child didn't have any too noticeable elvish qualities she could pull it off. It was what they wanted, wasn't it? How unfortunate, after such a fight she was still going to end up married to that cretin. Fate is not without a sense of humor.
Bulma sighed and her body relaxed at last. She was tired, so tired of fighting the undertow. It was time to let it take her out to sea for she had not been strong enough to overcome it. She just didn't want to see another tear shed. She was afraid, but not alone and she had the peace and trust in her heart that she would see Vegeta again in some other world. She couldn't hear his voice but she could feel his soul.
She was done with crying, she was done with pity, she was done with self- loathing. If her parents wanted a queen, then a queen they would get, and she would raise her child to be a wise a wonderful ruler who was strong enough to stand against the tide. He would be the grandest leader this world had even seen and he would unite it.
And he would be half of Vegeta.
She smiled at her day dream. She could almost picture him. Yes, it would be a him. With silver hair and blue eyes even brighter then hers. Yes, he would be everything she could not be. She placed a hand gently over her stomach and whispered.
"I love you, and I promise you will always know you are loved and that you are more important then the sun itself to me or all the stars in the sky. You are everything and no force on this planet will take you from me."
And thus the inertia of Bulma's life moved forward. The moon would rise and the sun would fall, but she would never forget.
AN: ok where does this leave us? Somewhere just left of insanity? LoL. Hope this chapter made things a little better. Don't worry its not over yet, there is still much in store for everyone. At least they are all still alive! Thanks for reading