Catching Fire: Rekindling
By: Jamie Sommers
Chapter Twenty-Four: A Message From the Jabberjay
When we last left Panem Gale had gotten some advice from his mother. Effie and Haymitch were getting ready to break the tributes out of the arena. Peeta, Johanna and Beetee heard screaming coming from the part of the jungle that Katniss and Finnick were in.
Dear Readers, the beach scene is finally here. Writing this chapter was hard for me. It brought out a lot of emotions and I do hope as readers you can feel what I was attempting to express. Thank you for sticking with me, reading and reviewing. For you Outtakes fans, it's up and it's the chapter in which Banana Nut was conceived.
To my betas, this chapter is for you! Out of all of the chapters I always knew this one would mean the most to me so I dedicate this to both S and A for all of the hard work you two have done for me and continue to do. I am forever in your debt.
Catching Fire: Rekindling
"I knew she'd figure it out," Prim said with a huge smile plastered across her face. "Katniss is so smart. There was no way she wouldn't figure out the Gamemakers' trick with the clock."
Evelyn's smile matched Prim's but she was still concerned about the areas of the arena that Katniss and her allies had yet to explore. "With any luck, she and Peeta will be able to piece together what's happening in the other wedges of the jungle." She gave Prim's hand a reassuring squeeze. "What do you say we make some dinner?"
"Is Mr. Mellark coming again tonight?" Prim asked.
Evelyn gave her shoulder a noncommittal shrug. "Don't know, sweetie."
"He's been here a lot since the Games started. Doesn't his family wonder where he's been?" Prim knew why the baker had been spending time with them instead of his wife, Peeta asked him to take care of them.
"I'm sure they understand. He's worried about Peeta and Katniss' baby." Evelyn tried to think of something to tell her youngest daughter. "His grandchild is in the arena and he wants to make sure that it stays safe."
"He can do that from his own house, mom." Prim was really hoping her mother would start treating her like a grown up and not some little kid. "Maybe it has something to do with his divorce."
"Primrose Everdeen!" Evelyn's head snapped around. "How on earth do you know about that?"
"I heard him talking to you about it." Prim glanced at the television screen and saw Katniss and Peeta talking with Johanna and Finnick about where to go next. "They're fighting again."
"Who?"
"Katniss and Johanna." Prim gave Johanna and evil glare that matched her sister's. "That Johanna Mason isn't very nice."
"Don't change the subject, Primrose," Evelyn wanted to talk this out with her daughter. "Mr. Mellark and his wife have had problems, but it's their business, not ours."
"I know." Prim's eyes were glued to the television, but her ears were paying attention to her mother. "I just figured things are probably uncomfortable at home for him right now…all the time." Prim finally faced her mother. "Peeta's mom isn't the friendliest of sorts."
"Young lady, you shouldn't be speaking that way about your elders," Evelyn scolded her regardless of whether or not it was true.
"Mom, you have to admit, she's not very…" Prim tried to think of a nice word to use, but she was drawing a blank. "I know it's not very polite to say this, mom, but…she beat on Peeta. There were times when I'd meet up with him in the meadow and have to help him with cuts…burns… She hurt him a lot."
"Oh," Evelyn's heart broke when she heard this.
"I don't even think Katniss knows about everything she did to him." Prim sat at a kitchen chair. "There was one time, before he and Katniss were going out, that Peeta didn't come to school in the morning. He showed up after lunch and when I asked him after school where he was, he said that he had an accident at the bakery." Prim looked down at her feet. "When I asked him what kind of accident he lifted his sleeve up and…Oh, mom," tears filled Prim's eyes as she met her mother's watchful gaze, "he had such a bad burn. It was blistered and…it looked like someone held something hot against his skin."
Evelyn's breath caught in her throat, her hand covered her mouth so her cry of horror wouldn't escape. "Wh…what did you do, Prim?"
"I came home and got some of that burn cream you made and wrapped the last sterile bandage we had around it. Told him how to take care of it and sent him home with more cream." Prim remembered her mother wondering where the last bandage went when someone had come to her home with a bad cut across the palm of their hand. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about taking the stuff out of the apothecary, but I wasn't sure if I should tell you about me and Peeta…us being friends and all." Prim watched the television set and saw Katniss and Peeta talking to each other. "Mr. Mellark was right about one thing… his wife never deserved to have Peeta as a son. I know that's not the proper thing to say, but it's true. Peeta is a great person in spite of everything that's happened in his life and I'm glad the baker has finally decided to leave that woman. I just wish Peeta's brothers would leave her too. Don't you wonder if she hurts them the way she hurt Peeta?"
Evelyn reached across the table and took Prim's hand in hers. "Sometimes, but they're adults and the choice to stay with her is theirs. I do agree with you though…she didn't…doesn't deserve to have Peeta for a son, but he's my son now…your brother and we'll give him all the love he missed out on in his life."
"How will we do that? He's in the arena, mom."
"Just because he's out of our reach doesn't mean he can't feel how much we care about him, Prim." Evelyn studied the girl who was just as tall if not taller than Katniss now, her childhood features were fading and in their place were those of a beautiful young woman. "Primrose, when did you grow up?"
There was sadness in Prim's voice when she answered, "When Effie Trinket called out my name at the reaping."
"Yes, I suppose so," Evelyn said with a heavy heart.
Prim hated that her mother looked so forlorn, "Why don't I turn up the television and we can watch it from here while we start dinner? This way we can keep an eye on Katniss and Peeta," she suggested.
"That's a lovely idea." Evelyn looked to the television screen. "Your sister isn't very fond of Johanna Mason either." She noticed Katniss glaring at the woman.
"Not sure how long they're going to make it as allies," Prim turned up the volume and smiled when she heard Katniss talking to Peeta.
"You and my damn freckles." Katniss was trying to look angry, but Prim could tell that Peeta was on the verge of making her smile. "I don't have that many you know."
"Twelve on the bridge of your nose," Peeta grinned.
"You've counted?" Katniss' eyes lit up.
Peeta looked like a man in love as he answered her, "I've sketched them enough times; I could tell you exactly where they are without even looking…size and shape too."
"All right, it's official." Peeta had succeeded in bringing on a tiny smile to Katniss' face.
"What is?" He asked.
"I'm not mad at you anymore for trying to keep me from killing Johanna Mason." Prim felt her heart flutter when she saw the way they looked at each other.
"One day, I hope to find someone that loves me the way Peeta loves Katniss," Prim sighed like a lovesick girl. "He adores her…just like dad did you."
Evelyn smiled at her daughter. "You will, Primrose…just not too soon," she gave her a motherly warning. "I'm not ready to have you grow up that fast."
They worked side by side, peeling potatoes, carrots, dicing various vegetables and finally cutting up beef into cubes. Prim hoped the baker would surprise them with another treat from Peeta when he came over and Evelyn simply hoped that he would come over. Having him around almost made her feel like Peeta and Katniss had never left. Like they were still somewhat of a family. They watched in horror when the Careers attacked the Cornucopia and breathed a sigh of relief when Katniss jumped into the ocean to avoid the battle.
"Never thought I'd see the day when that girl turned her back on a fight," Evelyn watched in utter shock as her daughter swam back to the safety of Peeta after two more brutal deaths in the arena.
"She's turning into a mom." Prim grinned. "Putting the baby first." Prim turned to her mother. "I'm going to be the best aunt there ever was."
"I hope so, sweetie," Evelyn wanted Prim's wish to come true. "That would be a wonderful thing…having a baby around the house."
"Their house," Prim said as she watched Katniss and Peeta silently speaking to each other. "They're doing it again," she grinned. "I love it when they do that."
"Looks like Johanna doesn't think too highly of it," Evelyn went into the kitchen to wash her hands and listened as Prim giggled. "What's so funny?"
"Johanna wanted to know what they were saying and Peeta started telling Katniss how much he loved her. You should've seen the look on Johanna's face." Prim walked into the kitchen behind her mom. "She looked pretty frustrated. I don't think she likes Katniss too much."
"That's Johanna Mason's loss." Evelyn began throwing everything together in a pot for dinner.
With their supper started and the kitchen cleaned up, they watched the group make their way into the jungle.
"Mom?" Prim squinted when she saw a shot of the area Katniss and Finnick were walking into. "What are those?"
A feeling of trepidation hastily spread through Evelyn when she recognized what the Gamemakers' had in store for her daughter. "Jabberjays."
"What are they going to do?" Prim began to worry. "Think they'll attack like the las…"
"KATNISS!" They saw a bird open its beak, but heard Peeta's voice coming out of it.
"PEETA! PEEEEETA!" Katniss was running through the arena towards the sound of the bird.
"HELP ME!" The bird had mimicked Peeta's intonation flawlessly.
"No," Prim said quietly. "Don't Katniss." She watched as the trees filled with winged black creatures and listened as not only Peeta's voice, but her own, her mother's, Gale and his family and a voice that she didn't recognize, but Katniss did, taunted her in the jungle. Katniss shot arrow after arrow at the birds, but every time one was killed another quickly took its place. Finnick was clenching his hands over his ears and crying.
"What are they doing to them?" Prim buried her head into her mother's shoulder.
"Livening up the Games," Evelyn said with disgust.
…..
…..
She and Finnick had found a tree and were just about to insert the spile when she heard the sound of Peeta's terrified scream call out to her. "KATNISS!"
"PEETA!" Water instantly forgotten, Katniss ran towards the sound of his voice, certain that he had been captured by a Career and was being slaughtered. "PEEEETA!" His voice was getting louder, it was coming from somewhere in the jungle, up on a hill perhaps. She whipped her head around in every direction, trying her best to find him, her arrows at the ready. "PEETA WHERE ARE YOU?"
"NOOOOOOO…" his screams reverberated through her ears. Sounds of Peeta being…bludgeoned to death? Sliced apart?
"Where are you?" Her whole body was trembling with fear as she looked upwards. "Dear God," the sight of a jabberjay caused the hairs on the back of her neck to rise. The birds were supposed to be extinct,so Katniss had never actually seen a live jabberjay before, but she knew why the Capitol had created them during the rebellion and what their ultimate purpose was. 'Now,' she realized, 'the Capitol is using them against me…a face of the new rebellion.' Fury flushed through her as she took aim on the wretched bird and killed it, twisting its neck when it fell to the ground for good measure.
"Katniss?" Finnick was panting when he caught up to her. "What's going on? Where's Peeta?"
"It wasn't him. Jabberjays," Katniss' tone oozed with repulsion as she kicked the black bird across the jungle ground. "They're using our symbo…"
"Aaaaaaaaaah!" The blood curdling scream robbed Katniss of air before racing in towards another direction of the jungle. "Prim? Prim!" The moment she found the bird she shot it with trembling fingers. "Jabberjays repeat what they've…" her throat had gone dry as a desert. "They have him…her…"
"FINNICK! FINNICK HELP ME!"
"Annie!" Finnick shot around and started running for another area of the jungle with Katniss hot on his trail. "Where is she?"
Katniss shot at the bird and Annie's cries died instantly. "We have to go back. Maybe this is just a trick." Her mind was telling her that was the case, but her heart was certain that Prim and Peeta had been captured by the Capitol and were being tortured. "Come on," Katniss headed towards the path that took them into the area of the jungle and ignored the howls of pain from Peeta and Prim, two more birds had followed her. The only way she could keep herself from losing all of her sanity was by trying to convince herself that it wasn't real. 'But jabberjays repeat what they hear,' her mind was screaming to her, 'they don't talk on their own.' "Ignore it, Finnick," Katniss told him when the sound of Annie returned, her voice trembling the entire time. "There," Katniss pointed to the curvy path that had taken them to the tree. "They're right behind that…" her words stopped mid-sentence when there was no sight of Peeta, Johanna or Beetee. "No," she shook her head. "No." She whipped around and shot at the bird with Peeta's voice only to have it followed up with another. "STOP!"
"We have to find them, Katniss," Finnick ran towards their old campsite. "They were just here." His face smacked into something causing his nose to start pouring out blood.
"What is this?" Katniss' hands began feeling the wall of the jungle, because that was all she could think of it as, a wall. A clear wall that allowed her to view the spot where Peeta had been, but was prohibiting her from looking for signs of his abduction. She pounded on the clear partition screaming out Peeta's name, Peeta! Where are you? Peeta!," but it was useless. He was gone. "Finnick?" She walked slowly backwards. "Do you think they have…" Sounds of Johanna Mason and Beetee in pain shook Katniss to her core. "They have them. They're torturing them."
Finnick was shaken beyond belief. "Annie. They have Annie." He dropped to the ground and hooked his hands over his head, blocking his ears with his arms.
Katniss shot arrow after arrow at each creature, trying to shut them up, telling herself it wasn't real. The capitol was playing a trick on her, but the sound of Cinna being beaten to death was real. It was his last moments of life that the jabberjays were repeating for her benefit. Now she had sound to go with the image of the Peacekeepers pummeling on him. "Cinna," she reached for an arrow, but found none there. "Peeta," Katniss cradled her stomach and sat on the ground, rocking back and forth. "Don't listen," she didn't know why she was speaking to her child, but she felt the need to protect it from hearing its father's cries of pain. "Don't listen," she repeated over and over again.
Peeta stood on the opposite side of the translucent barrier, his hands pressed up against it, his face merely inches away from Katniss'. "I'm here, Katniss. Right here." He couldn't hear anything from her portion of the arena other than the initial sound of his voice calling out to her. "They don't have me. Shhh…" He wanted to hold her, break through whatever it was that was keeping him from her, and comfort her.
"They can't see us," Beetee said it with a shake of his head.
"But we can see them?" There was a sick feeling in the pit of Johanna's stomach as she watched Finnick suffering through the clear wall.
"Oh, yes," Beetee answered. "It was developed that way. That's what was used prior to force fields. It's an antiquated form of technology, but it seems to be getting the job done in this circumstance. Unfortunately there is no way to penetrate it. That was quite a breakthrough in its time," there was a hint of pride in Beetee's voice when he spoke of it.
Johanna looked at Peeta, who was sitting next to Katniss and watching her suffer. "Yeah…a real breakthrough." Katniss had taken up a fetal position on the other side of the partition and had her hands over her ears. Johanna could only imagine what they were listening to in there. She walked to Peeta and put a hand on his shoulder, "You can't help her until the hour is up. Finish the map."
"I…I can't," there was a catch in his voice. "Not while she's suffering in there. Look at her." He began speaking to Katniss, "Prim is fine…no, Katniss they're not hurting her."
"You can understand her from here?"
Peeta nodded his head. "They're listening to the sounds of their loved ones being tortured."
"Guess we know why they can't see us," Johanna said with disgust, "they knew you'd be able to talk to her through that soundproof piece of shit." She let out a huff of air. "Those bastards."
"You think that's why, Johanna?" Peeta looked up to her.
"Hell yeah. If she could see you, you'd be able to talk her through it…this way…you're both suffering. You might as well be in there with her."
"I wish I were. It should've been me. I am the jabberjay after all." Peeta pounded his fist against the barrier and stood up. "Where's the map?"
Johanna was surprised he was willing to finish it. "Over here."
"Get it for me," Peeta asked then looked upwards, knowing they were all on camera. "You won't break me with this. You can try, but it won't work." He was determined to keep his wits about him for Katniss' sake. She'd need him when this was over and if he let her suffering get to him, he'd be as much of a wreck as she was.
Johanna gave him a sly grin and said, "Good for you, cinnamon buns."
Peeta scratched out the remaining sections of the arena and stabbed his knife into the tip of the leaf, holding it into the ground, patiently waiting for the hour to pass. His hand stayed on the partition until it was gone and the jabberjays disappeared. He walked the few feet to Katniss and lifted her in his arms, carrying her to safety. "Shhh…" he kissed her head. "I'm here. You're safe now."
"Peeta!" Her arms flew around his neck. "You were…I thought you…" her sobs quaked her whole body as he sat next to a tree and began to rock her back and forth. "They were torturing you."
"No, Katniss. I'm right here. I've been here the whole time watching you." He stroked her back, her arms, everywhere his hands could reach. "We couldn't get through that barrier."
"Prim…they have Prim," she blubbered into his neck.
"They don't have Prim, Katniss. Those birds were meant to make you think that. They were mutts," he kissed her forehead. "You're going to be fine. Prim's fine. She's at home right now and she's probably watching this telling you she's fine."
"But you didn't hear them. The screams." Katniss squeezed her arms around his neck. "I thought you were being tortured to death. That I'd never see you again."
"That's what they wanted you to think." He could feel her heart racing against his chest and wanted nothing more than to find their president and kill the man for what he was making Katniss go through. "Look, if I'm here then it stands to reason that Prim's was a fake too. They can't hurt Prim."
"But it…"
"Who did you call your jabberjay?" Peeta lifted her face out of his neck and cradled her cheeks, reminding her of the few times in which she compared him to the Capitol's creation. "Katniss, who's your jabberjay?"
"You," she sniffed.
"Would I ever hurt Prim?" He held her startled eyes with his calm ones.
"No. Never, but these weren't like you they were…"
"It was the representation of me." There was no denying that now and Peeta knew it was more than just a personal message from Snow; it was a warning to them about the rebellion. Katniss had been the mockingjay and now Peeta knew for certain that he was the rebellion's jabberjay. "It was my symbol and I would never hurt the people I love. They didn't hurt me and they didn't hurt your family."
Katniss tucked her head under his chin, "If you only heard it, Peeta."
"We heard the initial sound of my voice and then there was nothing. They blocked us out and let us watch you two go through hell in there." He stroked Katniss hair away from her face. "Katniss think about this for a minute. We're almost down to the final eight and what happens when we get to the final eight?"
Her voice cracked as she said, "Seven more of us die."
"No, Katniss. What do they do when there are only eight tributes left in the Games…think about it," Peeta encouraged her.
"Ummm…they interview your friends and family?" She wasn't sure if that was the right answer, but she knew Peeta was trying to help her and that was all she could think of.
"That's right. This whole country is in love with Prim so you know they're going to interview her first then your mom…Gale…all of your cousins. So how can they hurt them when they have to interview them?" Peeta's logic was breaking through to her.
"You think?" Katniss turned to Finnick who was glued to Peeta's soothing voice. "Finnick, what do you think?"
"I suppose it could be true," he answered.
"Beetee," Peeta said very calmly, "isn't it possible for them to alter voices so Katniss and Finnick thought they heard the real thing?"
"Absolutely. It's a simple procedure really. Our school children learn how to do it," Beetee played around with his wire while answering.
"See?" Peeta stroked Katniss head. "So don't worry. They were playing a trick on you…like the mockingjays and Rue's song. They were mutts Katniss."
It made sense to her, but she couldn't get the sound of his screams out of her head. The sounds of Prim begging for help and Cinna's desperate sounds as he was being bludgeoned to death. "Cinna…" she started to cry into his shoulder.
"Cinna is…"
Katniss lifted her hand to Peeta's mouth. She looked at him and mouthed, "He's dead. I watched them beat him to death."
Peeta questioned her with his eyes. "Are you sure?"
She nodded and buried her face in his chest. "That was real, Peeta and if that was real…Prim…"
It took a moment for Peeta to absorb the news about Cinna being killed in front of Katniss and he instantly worried about Portia, Effie and Haymitch. "Did you hear anyone else from our team back at the Capitol?" he asked cautiously.
"No, but Peeta…what if they have my family?"
"Katniss look at me," Peeta guided her tear filled eyes to his. "It was a trick. A horrible one, but it was just a trick like the mutts last year. Remember how we thought they took the eyes out of our friends and family?"
Katniss nodded remembering how horrible it was to kill the mutt version of Gale. "Do you really believe that, Peeta? That it was a trick?"
"I really do," he kissed her lightly on the lips.
"Finnick?" Katniss turned to him and saw how engrossed he was in Peeta's explanation of the events that had just occurred. "Do you believe it?"
"It could be true. I don't know." Finnick replied in a shaky voice.
"Listen to me, they can't hurt Prim. They need her to do the interviews." Peeta could feel Katniss slowly calming down.
"They'd never hurt Prim," Johanna began to bellow. "The whole country is in love with Katniss' little sister. If they really killed her like this they'd probably have an uprising on heir hands." Johanna lifted her face to the sky and yelled out, "Wouldn't want that. The whole country in rebellion! God forbid anything like that happened!"
Katniss sat there in shock at Johanna's blatant display of insurrection in the middle of the Games, which did two things, gave Katniss a lot more respect for the woman and confirmed her suspicions that Johanna Mason was, in fact, a rebel.
Johanna grabbed several empty shells, "I'm going to get water."
"No!" Katniss wasn't the biggest fan of the woman, but she couldn't fathom the idea that anyone go through what she and Finnick just had. "Don't go in there."
Johanna looked down at Katniss, expressionless and said, "They can't hurt me. There's nobody left that I love."
Katniss curled into Peeta's arms, still in an emotional upheaval. She didn't know what the cause of her sobs were, the thought of losing her loved ones…of losing Peeta or simply the fact that she was pregnant and couldn't control any of her emotions as of late. "Peeta," she whispered into his ear as she gripped him for dear life. "I want to go home. Take me home."
"You will, Katniss. You'll go home, I promise," Peeta was slightly encouraged by her desire to want to win the Games until she followed up with her next statement which confirmed what he thought for the past two days. Katniss was hoping to keep both of them alive and have a repeat of the prior year in which they both won the Games.
"We can go back to Twelve and raise our baby. We won't start any trouble. We'll just live in our little village with my mom and Prim and Haymitch and I swear I'll be good. I won't do anything to stir up trouble. We can live a quiet life away from everyone and everything." She looked upwards to the trees, hoping that the cameras would pick up her plea…hoping that President Snow would accept her bargain. "Let us go home. You and me Peeta. We can just go back to our house and you can…" the tears were streaming down her face, "…you can paint the nursery…paint a giant oak tree above the crib and we'll raise the baby just like you said we would." She pulled back and looked into his grief stricken face. "Remember, Peeta? Remember what you said?" He had told her if they ever had a child they'd raise it like a Career and teach it everything it needed to know in case it was thrown into the arena.
"I remember, Katniss, but…" How could he do this to her now? How could he put her through even more hell than she had already gone through? "…Katniss," he sighed out her name.
"Don't you want to do that with me?" She started kissing his face, holding onto the sides of his head and trailing wet, tear-filled kisses everywhere. "You want to do that, don't you? Go home with me and the baby? Be a family?"
"Of course I do," his heart was breaking into a million little pieces. "There's nothing I want more than to go home and be a family."
"Then we'll do it," Katniss said as though just her words would make it happen. She tucked her head under his chin and let him hold her.
Peeta fought the emotions that were overwhelming him. The loss he knew he'd have to face, worse the loss she would have to face. He glanced at Finnick who was still in a state of shock mumbling about getting water. "Who did they use against Finnick," Peeta asked her.
"Someone named Annie."
Peeta nodded his head. "Annie Cresta. She was the girl Mags volunteered for. She won about five years ago."
Katniss shook her head, not knowing who the woman was. "My dad died…"
"I know," Peeta rubbed her back so she wouldn't think about that time period. "There was an earthquake in the arena and it broke a damn. Annie won because she was the strongest swimmer." Peeta lowered down his voice when he told Katniss, "She went mad after seeing her tribute partner beheaded."
Going mad was exactly how Katniss felt…like she was on the brink of it. "Did she get better…afterwards?"
"Don't know. I never saw her at the Games again…till this year. She showed up as Mags mentor, but I'm not sure how she was doing. I only saw her once and she was glued to Finnick's side."
Katniss held Peeta's cheek to make him look at her. "That's who he loves," she mouthed to him.
"Guess so," Peeta's heart went out to Finnick. He couldn't imagine what the guy was going through thinking that she was in the hands of the Capitol right now.
"Here," Johanna handed Katniss a shell full of water. "I got your arrows for you." Katniss just nodded her head in thanks.
A cannon fired in the distance and they all moved downwards towards the beach. The hovercraft appeared and the claw made several trips up and down into the flying machine, picking up pieces of whichever tribute was killed. Peeta scratched into the leaf, 'beast,' for the six to seven o'clock hour. They had now filled in more than half of the clock on Peeta's map. They made their way to the body of water, washed up and put more ointment on their skin. Katniss immediately felt that queasy felling in the pit of her stomach and sniffed at her little stick, reminding herself once again to take some of the medication Haymitch had gotten to her. Finnick fished and Beetee played with his wire, a thin strip of gold no thicker than a few strands of hair with a tiny magnet on each end of it.
"Want me to clean those for you?" Katniss walked up to Finnick, still somewhat out of it from listening to Annie's petrified cries, as he placed the fish he caught on the beach.
"Yeah." Still unable to keep his hands idle he weaved yet another bowl making sure to stay busy and not dwell on what might be happening to Annie back at the Capitol.
"Hey," Peeta sat next to Katniss who had no problem with cleaning the fish until she sliced it open.
"I can't do this," her stomach was flopping around. She tossed the fish onto the wet sand and began storming off.
"Katniss," Peeta called to her. "Come back here."
"I can't." Her back was turned to Peeta.
"I'll finish the fish, just come over here. Sit by me."
"You don't get it," She turned on him. "I can't stand looking at it. Gutting it makes me want to wretch."
"Then face away from it and sit with me," Peeta insisted. "Come on."
Katniss sat with her back against his as he cleaned Finnick's catch and was grateful for the lack of smell she was experiencing. "What's wrong with me?" She was furious with herself. "This is ridiculous. I can't clean a fish, I can't skin an animal…I can't even handle the smell of this medication without losing whatever's in my stomach. I'm picking up scents only a dog would. I'm tired all the time, and I do mean, all the time. I can't stop drinking which is probably why I can't stop peeing. I've cried more times in the past seventy-two hours than I have in my entire life and I want to kill my allies just because I'm cranky." She rested her head against Peeta's shoulder. All Katniss had ever wanted in her life was safety…security…things the Capitol had robbed the people of their nation of. A short time ago all she could think about was starting an uprising, but things were different now that she and Peeta were in the arena again. It was blatantly obvious by the use of both the mockingjay and the jabberjay that she and Peeta were the symbols of the rebellion. They were the ones the people of their country were looking to for courage, yet she seemed to be lacking it in spades as of late. She couldn't help but to feel as though she was letting everyone, including herself, down. "Some victor I am," she sighed.
"You done feeling sorry for yourself?" Peeta asked in a somber tone.
"I am not feeling sorry for myself. I'm pissed at myself! This is not who I am." Katniss couldn't take it anymore. Her hot and cold temper was even getting to her. "Why is this happening to me?"
Peeta exhaled noisily as he finished the last of the fish and placed them in the bowl Finnick weaved. "You're not going to like the answer."
"So you think you know what it is?" Katniss saw the pile of fish guts sitting on the beach and instantly ran to the edge of a tree.
Peeta walked to the water and threw away the remaining parts of the fish, washed his hands and followed Katniss. He pulled her braid away from her face and rubbed the center of her back as she lost all of the water she had drunk earlier. "You'll be all right, Katniss. Get it all out and you'll feel better."
She wanted to push him away, but his soothing voice and his light touch was too comforting. When there was nothing left inside of her system for her to expel, the dry heaves started and scratched the hell out of her already burning throat.
"Okay," Peeta said tenderly. "It's almost over now and then you can sip some water and eat those crackers." But the crackers had been crushed after all Katniss had gone through that day. When she was through Peeta carried her to the ocean and let her rinse her mouth out. Helped her to clean herself up again, undid her braid and made her lay back in the water to wet it. "I'll braid it for you after you relax some, okay?"
Katniss' energy was completely sapped. There was no fight left in her. "Thanks." She let the warm water wash away the filth she felt instantly covered in, ran her fingers through her loose hair in the sea and stood up. "You have no idea how badly I need a toothbrush right now."
Peeta laughed a little and started to braid her hair down the side of her head. "Hey, Haymitch! Katniss needs a toothbrush and some crackers." He had only been kidding, but the parachute landed in the water right next to them. "No way," Peeta quickly picked it up and handed it to Katniss. "What is it?" He finished plaiting her hair.
Katniss looked upwards and said, "Thank you." Inside was a toothbrush a tube of paste and another package of crackers. "I'm not sure who our sponsors are, but I am so grateful for them right now."
"Come on." Peeta took her hand. "Let's get you some fresh water so you can brush your teeth."
"What was in the chute?" Johanna asked glaring accusingly at them.
"Haymitch sent Katniss a toothbrush and some crackers since she keeps having morning sickness…at any given time of the day," Peeta answered.
"Well, at least we won't have to smell her breath," Johanna couldn't care less about the gifts Katniss got, but she was a little surprised that it seemed Katniss actually was pregnant and not just faking it for the pity of the audience.
The strange shade of twilight, a purplish colored sky with a now silver sun, filled the arena as they sat down to their meal and the anthem began with the faces of the dead immediately after. Cashmere, Wiress, Mags, the woman from Five, Priscilla, Blight and both tributes from District Ten.
"Eight dead," Finnick said softly. "Plus eight last night."
"They're really burning through us. Are they trying to set a new record or something?" Even Johanna was having a hard time seeing how many had died in the span of two days.
"Who's left besides us and District Two?" Finnick asked.
"Chaff," Peeta said sadly without hesitation.
The parachute came down in the center of their group with a pile of bite-sized square shaped rolls. "These are from your district, right Beetee?" Peeta asked.
"Yes," he answered. "How many are there?"
Finnick immediately took possession of the bread, turning each one over and counting them out. "Twenty-four," his stare went from Johanna to Beetee and back to Johanna again.
"An even two dozen," Beetee nodded.
"Twenty-four on the nose," Finnick confirmed. "How should we divide them up?"
Johanna said offhandedly, "Let's each take three and whoever's still alive in the morning can decide how to divide the rest."
Katniss let out a tiny laugh at Johanna's brusque retort, which the woman seemed to appreciate. Then offered her crackers to those around her. "Would anyone like some of these?" No one did. "There's enough to share…one each and then one leftover."
Peeta rubbed her shoulder and said, "Katniss, no one wants to eat your soda crackers. If you can't stomach the fish, at least you'll be able to have those. Now eat them."
It was hard for her to argue, but she ate them and waited several long minutes before trying to eat any of the dinner the rest of them had been enjoying. "I think I'll try a piece of fish now, if that's okay?"
"Of course it is," Finnick gave Katniss a look like she was crazy for even asking. "Here." He handed her a bowl he had woven filled with fish. "That's yours."
"There's too much here," Katniss looked around at the portions everyone else was eating and hers was at least double the amount. "I can't eat all of this." Before winning the Games her livelihood was based on fair trades and having twice as much food as her allies was far from fair.
"Can't or won't?" Peeta asked. "Because I know you can. Now just eat your dinner."
Earlier when Finnick had been diving for shellfish and it was just three in their alliance, Katniss had no feelings of guilt over how much she ate, but now that Johanna and Beetee were there…mostly Johanna, she felt as though everything she put into her mouth for consumption was being monitored. "I'll just eat a little bit and if anyone else wants…"
"Oh for Christ sake!" Johanna had enough of her shit. "None of us want your damn food so eat it. If we get hungry Finnick can get more, now shut up and eat."
"Fine," Katniss barked at her and devoured what was in the bowl including the three rolls from Beetee's district, rationalizing it by telling herself that she was eating for two.
"Still hungry, Katniss?" Finnick asked her. "I can dive for some shellfish if you want."
"No, I'm okay." Surprisingly she was still hungry, but she didn't want to tell anyone that.
"Would you mind, Finnick?" Peeta asked. "It's kind of dark out though…will that be a problem?"
"Nah, I've been doing this my whole life." he stood up. "Anyone else want more?" None of them did.
"Peeta I said I was okay. You didn't have to make him go back in the water," there was that whole guilt thing again.
"Finnick seems to be enjoying feeding you, plus it keeps his mind off of…other things," Peeta rubbed her shoulder. "Besides, I know you're still hungry. You're eyeing up the empty bowl like you want to lick it clean."
Katniss gave him a small grin. "Probably could eat a little something else."
"Good," Peeta kissed her cheek. "Like Finnick said earlier, we've got to fatten that baby up," he gave her tummy a little rub.
Finnick pulled out several different types of fish and cleaned them close to the ocean so as not to disgust Katniss again, then brought them up to her. "Better eat these quick. I think the ten o'clock wave should be hitting soon."
It didn't take long for her to polish it off while the rest of them gathered their things allowing the residual effects of the wave to clean up the mess they had left on the beach. They made their camp at the ten o'clock hour, Katniss and Peeta volunteering for the first watch because they had more rest than the others, but mostly because they wanted some time alone. Johanna, who hadn't gotten more than thirty minutes of sleep since the start of the Games finally fell asleep. Beetee secured his coil to his belt and slept with his hand over it and Finnick finally dozed off, but his sleep was restless. He tossed and turned murmuring Annie's name over and over again.
Katniss and Peeta sat in the moonlight, the sound of the now dark ocean's waves rippling through the air. The temperature was still hot, but the air didn't feel as thick as it had earlier in the day. With their backs to each other and one hand on a weapon, the other entwined together, they sat and kept guard over their allies.
She seemed much calmer now and with the way the Capitol was going through tributes, Peeta wasn't sure if he would make it till morning. There was so much to say to Katniss, but he had to ease into it for fear of causing her another bought of tears. "Ready for the answer now?"
"What answer?" Katniss asked. Her thoughts had been dwelling on the jabberjays and the wicked sounds that they had made.
"You asked me what was wrong with you…why these things were happening to you," Peeta said.
"And you said I wasn't going to like the answer." There was concern written all over Katniss' face.
…..
…..
Gale's heart was aching as he watched Katniss and Peeta sitting side by side on the beach in the arena while sitting in his living room.
"You asked me what was wrong with you…why these things were happening to you," Peeta said to Katniss.
"And you said I wasn't going to like the answer." Anguish was written all over Katniss' face as Peeta began speaking to her.
Gale listened as Peeta poured his heart out to her, reasoning with her about the things that were going on in her body, the changes she was experiencing and saw the pain spread across his face as he convinced Katniss it was time to let him go. The anger he had felt towards the man he had called his friend only days before, dissipated and was now focused on the real source of Gale's frustrations…the Capitol and President Snow himself. Gale's stomach tightened into knots when he saw the photos Peeta had shown Katniss and when Peeta referred to him as his friend Gale felt a startling shock of grief rip through him. He listened as Peeta publicly gave his wife and child a future without him in it and Gale vowed that he would do all he could to take care of Katniss and Peeta's child, not only because he loved Katniss, but because Peeta needed him to keep his word. If it were up to Gale, he'd end the Games right then and there and let the family, because he now realized that that's what they were, the Mellark family, live their lives away from the horrors of the Capitol…away from a life in which their child would most certainly have to face the arena and murder other children in order to survive. Fury filled his heart, fury at the government that ruled their nation and took away a man's right to be a father and a woman's ability to be happy about the birth of a child. As he watched Katniss and Peeta express their love for one another, a piece of his heart broke into little bits. There was still jealousy lingering deep within him, but there was nothing more Gale could do about it at this point in time. His job would start when Katniss came home and even then he wasn't sure if he could ever do what Peeta needed him to do. In fact, he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt now, that he could never be the kind of husband and father that Peeta would have…was currently being for Katniss and their child. He watched as their love for each other took over and the Games faded away and for the briefest moment in time, he wished it were him in the arena with Katniss, if only to feel what it was like to be loved by her the way she adored Peeta. When Peeta put her to bed for the night, Gale stepped outside of his house and into the night air. All of the rage that had been building up inside of him was threatening to boil over. He wanted to fight…fight for everyone's right to be free. He hated the Capitol now more than ever and he vowed that he would find a way to make President Snow pay for what he was doing…what he had done to everyone in their nation.
…..
…..
Haymitch and Effie sat quietly side by side until it was time to send in the sponsor gift of District Three bread. Prior to that Katniss had needed a few things, which Effie had secretly sent into her from Haymitch's computer, only Effie had made some adjustments to it and instead of the gift registering with the Capitol as a sponsor gift from District Twelve it appeared to come from District Four. No one would question sponsor gifts sent to Katniss from her ally's districts. It was the only way she could think of to follow the president's orders and still complete the rebel's mission.
"Where's my computer?" Haymitch began throwing things around the room, looking under sofa cushions, on tables… "What the hell happened to it?" he screamed out.
"Look in your room," Effie suggested. "Perhaps it's still in there. I'll search the other rooms for you." She had taken the device so Haymitch could no longer send in sponsor gifts. She was unable to speak to him, to tell him what had occurred earlier in the day and why he could no longer send in sponsor gifts from District Twelve. Effie knew what needed to be done and took it upon herself to do so. She walked into her quarters, lifted up the mattress and pushed several buttons sending in the proper amount of rolls to the tributes. This time the gift appeared to come from District Three.
"Effie!" Haymitch burst into her room before she could hide the device. "Wh…"
She lifted her finger over her mouth to silence him and shook her head frantically from side to side.
Haymitch could see panic filling her eyes and knew something was up. From the television screen he saw the bread float down into the center of their tributes and knew it had come from Effie. He questioned her with his eyes and sat next to her on the bed to look at the computer screen. He instantly saw something strange about the screen she was using. It was no longer locked into District Twelve, but showed every district and allowed her to send anything from any district yet still use the funds that had been supplied to Twelve. "How?" Haymitch mouthed to her.
Effie simply shook her head from side to side and held the computer to her chest.
He took this as a sign that she couldn't speak about it. A terrible feeling traveled to the pit of his stomach as he recalled the meeting Effie had that morning and how long she was gone. "What do you say you and I go out for a drink?" He whispered to her.
"I can't leave." She lifted her fingers, pointed to his watch and lifted up two fingers.
He pressed his lips as close to her ear as possible. "Two o'clock?"
She nodded then said, "Have you found your little computer yet?"
"No," he said as he watched her shove it back under her mattress. "I was going to send them in a loaf of bread to go with their dinner, but it looks like Beetee's district did that. I'll find it later."
"Very well," Effie took his hand and squeezed it. "We shall find it later. Why don't we let the others get some rest and then I plan on going home and sleeping. I am desperate for a good night's rest."
"Yeah…sure," he answered. "We'll get Annie settled down with Portia in here…keep the girl company so she doesn't wander around."
"Excellent idea."
After the images of the deceased were shown Skip, Annie and Portia headed to bed while Haymitch and Effie sat side by side on the sofa. There was so much he wanted to ask her and even more she needed to tell him, but it wasn't safe and they both longed for a day in which they could simply speak their minds and not have to worry about the consequences.
The suite was dark with the exception of the light coming off of the television screen filled with an image of Katniss and Peeta. All the Capitol staff had been let go for the evening and Effie and Haymitch sat and watched together in silence.
Effie stared at the boy she had loved as much as if she had given birth to him herself and listened to him with a heavy heart. "You asked me what was wrong with you…why these things were happening to you," Peeta said to Katniss.
Katniss appeared to be dreading what Peeta was about to say. "And you said I wasn't going to like the answer."
Haymitch could barely handle what Peeta was saying to Katniss. It was obvious to him that Peeta hadn't understood the message that Cinna and Portia had stitched into his clothing. The kid was a phenomenal actor, but he'd never put Katniss through the kind of pain he was currently putting her through unless he believed it to be necessary. Haymitch's glance flashed towards Effie who was holding her fingers over her mouth and trying to keep herself from showing too much emotion.
Watching Peeta speak about the life he thought he'd never have was gut wrenching for Effie, and there was still a chance that he wouldn't survive until the escape. That the words Peeta spoke weren't in vain. She kept telling herself, her kids would be safe in just over twenty-four hours, but no one could predict the arena. With each word Peeta spoke to Katniss, Effie felt her tears streaming down her cheeks, but it wasn't until he referred to her in a way that no one from the Capitol would recognize, that she had to turn away from the screen.
Haymitch automatically reached out for Effie's head and pulled her into his shoulder. His arm went around her and he squeezed the woman Peeta loved like a mother, the woman that adored the kids inside of the arena so much she had turned her back to everything she was raised to believe about her government and risked her life for their safety. He swallowed over and over again as he heard Peeta trying to free Katniss from the burden of his possible death. All Haymitch wanted to do was reach through the screen and pull his kids out of there, take them someplace safe and wash away everything the Capitol…the rebellion had done to their lives.
Effie turned her face towards the screen and kept her head against Haymitch's shoulder. Her heart overfilled with tenderness and admiration as she watched Peeta and Katniss Mellark expressing their love for one another. It was one of the most natural…beautiful sights she had ever been privy to see and hoped they'd share millions of moments like that throughout their life. She lifted her head from Haymitch's shoulder and smiled into his eyes.
As Haymitch watched Peeta and Katniss, the way they shut the world out and let only each other in, he envied them. "They could teach a lot of adults I know what love really means." Effie nodded in agreement and felt Haymitch's fingers brush against her own. He reached out and wiped away the tears that had streaked her face. "Trinkie," he said softly so no surveillance could pick up their conversation, "thanks."
"Whatever for?" She could only assume he was grateful for her help with the rebellion.
Effie Trinket had been the one constant in his life for over a decade. No matter what he did, what he said to her or how often he tormented her with his drunken spells, she never faltered. Regardless of how often she griped about being promoted to a different district, he knew she'd never leave him. Effie was the only person in the world that actually gave two damns about Haymitch's well being and in all the years that she took care of him, he had never once shown his gratitude. Haymitch cleared his throat and whispered, "Thanks for…everything…for helping me and…" He ran his hand down his face, a nervous habit he had picked up as a child and said, "Sheesh…just…thanks, okay?"
Effie still wasn't quite sure what she was being thanked for, but it would be rude not to reciprocate. "You're quite welcome." She faced the television screen then started a bit when she felt him move his lips close to her ear.
"For caring about me…being my friend," he whispered as a huge explosion of thunder crashed through the speakers breaking his momentary bout of sentiment.
…..
…..
"You asked me what was wrong with you…why these things were happening to you," Peeta turned slightly to face Katniss and marveled at the way her skin glowed bathed in the moonlight.
"And you said I wasn't going to like the answer," Katniss was sorry she had even brought up the subject earlier and when Peeta began to speak, she knew the moment she had been dreading since the reading of the card had finally come.
Peeta took a breath and told her, "You have a little life growing inside of you and it takes a lot of work for your body to get that job done, so yeah…you're going to be tired. Drink a lot. Eat a lot. Your hormones are completely out of whack and with that comes the tears and the temper." Peeta ran his thumb across her knuckles. "You might not like all the changes that are happening to you, but that's what it takes to create life."
"I can understand the hunger and the hormones, but…" Katniss let out a huge breath, "…I don't feel like myself anymore. I feel…" she hated to say it, "…weak. Like I'm not the same person I was last year."
"You're not." Peeta lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it. "Neither am I. People change Katniss and right now you're going through some changes that won't stop until you pop that little one out." He grinned at her. "Don't think of it as you being weak. Think of it as you being…blessed. How many women could face the arena in this condition?"
Katniss shrugged. "I don't know."
"None, but you can…you are. That's how strong you are, Katniss. You're so strong, so tough, you can survive this arena and create a baby at the same time." He turned them so they were now facing each other. "That's pretty damn impressive if you ask me."
Katniss looked down at their joined hands and said, "A year ago, I would've never run away from that fight at the Cornucopia today. Honestly, I almost didn't and then something inside of me just said run. Get out of there." She paused for a second. "Peeta, the worst part is I don't regret jumping into that ocean…staying there and helping the rest of you… I know I should've, but all I kept thinking was, save yourself." She lifted her eyes to his. "I'm selfish."
"No," Peeta cupped her cheek in his hand. "You're…" he let out a wondrous sigh, "…a mother. You said it yourself, you've changed and whether you like it or not, you're prioritizing things now. Our baby is your first priority."
"But you…Peeta I have to save you too," she covered the hand he held against her face with her own.
It was time to make her face reality; Peeta knew this in the depth of his heart. It was time for Katniss to accept his death and the future she could have back in Twelve. "Katniss, it's no use pretending we don't know what the other is trying to do out here. Don't know about you, but I made a deal with Haymitch to save your life right after the reading of the card," Peeta saw the guilty expression cross her face. "Yeah, I figured you did the same, which means he lied to one of us." Peeta lifted Katniss' chin so she could face him. "Now that he knows about the baby, whose promise do you think he's going to keep?" Katniss' eyes registered fear. "Twenty-four of us go in and one…one comes out Katniss. Not two."
"Why are you saying this to me?" Katniss could feel herself becoming slightly unhinged like she had when she listened to the sounds of him being tortured while trapped with the jabberjays. "You don't know that for certain. Last year there was only supposed to be one winner and…"
"And being a victor was supposed to mean you stay out of the reaping for life," Peeta's voice never faltered from that trancelike tone. "I love you, Katniss. So much…so much I'm willing to die for you and not think twice about it."
She felt the same way. "I would die for you, Peeta. I would. You deserve to live…to raise our child…" But he couldn't raise their baby because if she died so did their child. "It's not fair. All we did was love each other and now…" her eyes were filled with tears, "…now all of these people have to die just because…" Because they refused to play by the Capitol's rules last year, but Katniss knew better than to finish the statement.
Peeta thought about it for a second then said to her, "It's not fair for me to ask you to let me die, because I know what you're feeling…how painful life will be, but you and me…our circumstances are so different now, Katniss. You…" he leaned closer to her and fought the tears, "…you are my whole world. Without you, I'm nothing. If you died and I lived…I'd never be happy again."
"You could be…" Peeta placed a soft kiss against her lips to silence her.
"No, I could never be happy without you. You're the reason I wake up, why I've woken up since the age of five. It was you Katniss…always you that got me through the tough times. Even when you didn't know my name…deep inside of me…the love that I felt for you, that's what made the pain of my childhood fade away. You have been giving me a reason to live my whole life and without you in it…there is no reason for me to exist." Peeta cupped her cheeks in his hand, rested his forehead against hers and said, "But your life…it's different now, Katniss. It doesn't just belong to you anymore." It was time to say goodbye, whether he liked it or not, for no one knew how quickly a life could be taken in the Hunger Games. "Katniss, can I talk to the baby?"
Katniss furrowed her brow in curiosity. "How do you presume to do that?"
"Lean back," Peeta said hoarsely. Katniss rested back on her elbows as Peeta tilted his head down and spoke softly to her stomach. "Hey. You don't know me, but I'm your dad." Katniss swallowed the lump that began to form in her throat. "There are some things I wanted to tell you. Things I want you to know." Peeta ran a hand through his hair and tried to keep his voice steady. "I'm not really sure how this whole parenting stuff works, but I thought I'd give it a shot and if I mess up…well, just try to forgive your daddy. This is my first time being a father." He trailed his fingers below her navel and caressed the spot where he thought their child was. "First thing we need to talk about…your mother. She's so strong…so brave. Your mom can do anything, but make sure you don't take your mom too seriously. She acts like she's tough, but she's got a huge heart and if your grandpa teaches you how to bake, you'll make her the happiest mother alive." Peeta whispered to the baby like he was telling it a secret, "She loves chocolate." Katniss grinned when she saw Peeta's eyebrows rise and said, "And cheese buns. Your mommy could live off of those things. So if you ever want to butter her up…just bake for her." Katniss ran her fingers through Peeta's hair as he continued. "There are some things…important things that your mom will teach you. Make sure she shows you how to shoot a bow and arrow and how to swim. Your mom is the smartest woman you'll ever meet in your whole life, so listen to the things she teaches you and remember them forever. Your grandma and auntie Prim can teach you about herbs and healing. They're going to love you so much and your auntie Prim, she was your daddy's best friend for the longest time and I know she'll always be there for you if you ever need to talk. She can share all kinds of secrets about me…" Peeta whispered again, "She might even know some things your mom doesn't. Your other grandma," Katniss knew Peeta was speaking about Effie, "she'll teach you about manners and how to behave properly so you don't act like a spoiled brat, which I'm sure you will be…I guarantee your grandpa Haymitch is going to spoil you rotten." Peeta felt his throat tighten when he said, "Your grandma…she taught me about the love of a mother and how powerful it can be. You'll never meet another woman like her in your whole life." The tears Katniss had been trying to keep from falling could no longer be held back. "Learn all you can when you're in school. Knowledge is an important thing. Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself. People make mistakes all the time and if you learn how to laugh at your own mistakes, life is a lot easier, but learn from them too otherwise you'll never grow wiser." Katniss' silent tears streamed down her face as the man she loved more than life itself gave her and their baby permission to have a future. "Gale…" Peeta's voice cracked, "Gale…he's one of dad's friends…and he'll be there for you when I'm not. He'll teach you about snares and how to walk quietly…I'm horrible at that." Katniss smiled through her tears. "He's going to help to take care of you and your mommy and I know he's going to love you like…" Peeta gulped, "…like you're his very own." He licked a tear off of his upper lip and continued. "There will be times when you're wondering about things…have questions that only a dad can answer, but just because I'm not there with you doesn't mean you won't have a father. You'll have a great dad…your mom. She can do anything including love you enough for both of us." Peeta wiped his runny nose with the back of his sleeve and gave his child the best advice he could, "Most of all, don't be afraid to fall in love. It's how you got to be here, because I loved your mommy so much I just had to marry her and together we made you. You were created out of the best kind of love there is…eternal love…the kind that lasts forever and one day mommy will tell you all about it." Peeta took the locket off his neck and pressed it against Katniss' pin to open it up. Katniss' breath caught in her throat when she saw the images inside of it. Peeta slipped the photos out of it and spread the tiny pictures across the palm of his hand. "This locket is yours now and it holds the story of love so true it never dies." He picked up the pictures of Haymitch's grandparents and tucked them into the locket. "This is where it started. With your grandpa's grandparents and then it was passed down to them," Peeta picked up the next pictures, the ones he had secretly asked Effie for when they were on the tribute train in his notes about the victors. "This is your grandpa Haymitch when he was young and this was the girl he loved, Maysilee. And then…" Peeta put in the final pictures. Him and Katniss wearing their wedding clothes that Cinna and Portia had designed for them. "This is the greatest love story there ever was in my opinion and when you're old enough, your mommy is going to tell you all about these people," Peeta looked up at Katniss and held her teary gaze with his. "She's going to tell you all about me and her and how our love was so powerful…it changed the world." He placed a kiss on her stomach and brushed his fingers across it. "Remember, daddy loves you…always." Peeta sat up and placed the locket around Katniss' neck. "It's up to you now, Katniss…to make sure these stories of love never end."
Katniss sat up and held the dangling locket in her hand. She had listened to Peeta tell their child about everyone that would be there for it during the course of its life and how he wouldn't even be missed, but she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that their family would never be the same without him in it. "Peeta," she whispered to him. "You have to at least try and come home with me. You have to."
He shook his head, "You don't understand, Katniss. No one really needs me, but you…everyone needs you."
"No, Peeta," Katniss moved closer to him. "Your family needs you."
"Katniss, my family has gotten along without me for the past year. They don't need…"
She shook her head and said, "No!" Katniss pulled Peeta's hand back to her stomach and said tenderly, "Your family needs you. We need you."
Peeta had never experienced heartache like he had in the very moment. "But Katniss…"
She stopped his words with her lips. "We need you," her breathy words spoken against his lips. "We need you, Peeta." Her mouth captured his before he could protest.
Peeta tried to argue with her. There were so many others that could teach their child about life…he hardly knew a thing compared to the other people his baby would be surrounded by. "No Katni…"
She threaded her fingers through his hair and dipped the tip of her tongue into his mouth, gently stroking his. The flavor of their salty tears filled her taste buds, and then the warmth that he always brought to their kisses flooded her whole body. Her extremities began to tingle as her chest tightened and heat shot through her from the top of her head to the tips of her toes.
There was no fighting it. How could he? Peeta tried to reason with Katniss, but the moment he felt the warmth of her lips against his own, the tip of her tongue lightly brush up against his, the whole world faded away. He lifted his hand to the back of her head and ran his palm over her hair, slowly trailing it down her braid and wrapping it through his fingers like he had done so many times before. Their lips were brushing back and forth across each other's, their eyes locked in a loving embrace. Hers were shimmering and smoky, his yearning and bright. Peeta could feel the beat of his heart slowly accelerating as Katniss tilted her head to the side and released a hot breath against his skin. "Katniss," he whispered her name like an endearment and pulled her closer to him.
Katniss slowly crawled into his lap, straddling his legs with her own and running her hands up his arms…his neck until capturing his face in her hands. "Peeta," her lips captured his for a deep and slow kiss. "Say it," she breathed into his mouth as she pressed her chest against his. "Say it for me."
Her throaty whisper caused him to quiver. There was only one thing she wanted to hear…what she always wanted to hear when they loved each other this way. "I love you, Katniss Mellark." He slowly trailed his lips across her cheek, her body was growing tense in his arms and he whispered it again into her ear and listened as she let out a tiny sigh.
"I need you, Peeta," she whispered into his ear, but she was no longer talking about the conversation they were having only moments ago. She squeezed her legs around his waist and ran her hands down his muscular back letting her head tilt to the side, knowing that he'd kiss her in the crook of her neck. Her lips trailed up the side of his face and across his forehead. She pulled away from him and stared into his eyes. "I need you."
They were no longer in the arena, but in the privacy of their bedroom in Victor's Village. The sand that was clinging to their skin now felt like their soft silky sheets. The sound of the ocean had turned into the crickets, owls and blowing leaves that filtered through their window each night and the glow of the moonlight only accentuated their temporary escape from the Games.
Peeta pulled Katniss against him by the hips as she meshed their mouths together in a passionate kiss. Little sounds escaped from their throats, words of love were spoken as their hands explored their bodies. His fingers reached for the band that held her braid in then released her hair until it spread around her shoulders and fell down her back. She ran her hands under his shirt, running them around his waist, up his chest and over his shoulders, raising it partially up his torso, exposing his muscular abdomen. His fingertips trailed under the strap of her undershirt, pulling it down and exposing her shoulder to his lips where he trailed the tip of his tongue and pressed soft kisses into it. Then their mouths met again only this time their kiss was gradual, a delicate flow of their emotions. It was so soft, so slow it shook them both to their core. He didn't think he could ever love her anymore than he already did, but in that moment, his love for her multiplied a thousand percent. She had no clue how she had lived her whole life telling herself this was something she never wanted. It was all she wanted, this man that made her feel complete, had captured her heart…her soul, was who she lived for. Moist, puffy lips pressed together, warm, wet tongues tasted familiar flavors, caressed the supple interiors of each other's mouths. Their bodies gradually melted together, their souls a connection of two hearts becoming one… and a bolt of lightning split the sky, ripping them from the sanctuary of their adoring fantasy and throwing them back into life's harsh reality. Their eyes whipped towards the lightning tree then to Finnick who had been roused by the crackling sound and streak of light.
"I can't sleep anymore. One of you should get some rest." Finnick took in the scene before him, Katniss straddling Peeta's lap, their tousled hair, disheveled clothing and the sound of uncontrollable pants. "Or both of you can go to bed," he looked sheepishly away from the duo. "I can keep watch by myself."
"No," As much as Peeta wanted to curl up with Katniss, he didn't trust himself after what had just happened between them, plus the Careers were out there and he was sure they'd be hunting. "It's too dangerous. I'll stand guard with you. Just give me a minute." Peeta stood up and held his hand out to Katniss, walking her to the little shelter where Johanna and Beetee were sleeping. "Lie down," he waited until Katniss had taken up her position on the grass mat that Finnick had placed on the ground. He knelt over her and placed a long kiss against her belly. "Daddy loves you banana nut." He stretched out and leaned over Katniss, placing his lips against hers, "Daddy loves mommy too. With all his heart and soul." A tender kiss placed upon her lips, Peeta held the locket in his hand and tucked it into Katniss undershirt. "It's up to you to make sure the journey of these love stories never end." He stroked her stomach between them and kissed her once more. "I love you, Katniss…always."
She cradled his cheek in the palm of her hand and delved deep into his eyes, "Always, Peeta." Katniss waited until he walked away to let the pain of reality shred her apart. As she closed her eyes, she cradled Peeta's child in her arms and tried to imagine a world in which she and Peeta could raise their baby together. A world where there was no danger of their child being reaped and didn't have to grow up learning how to fight for the right to survive. She could see it…a little girl with long brown hair that curled at the end like her father's, running up to Peeta and being swept up into his arms like she used to do with her own dad, but her tears blurred the image and all Katniss could imagine was a life of loneliness and longing for the only person she had ever allowed into her heart.