Everyone turned to me surprised.

"Phil?" they wondered.

"Renee's husband, my step dad. Do I invite him?" I wondered.

"If you would like…" Sue said.

I sighed and laid back against Sam. I wanted to invite him but a part of me didn't. After Renee died, he stepped out of my life, making me handle everything myself. I was pretty old, but I was so shook up from what I saw. So was that a true father? How he acted…did that give him a right? I mean, we were close, but not that close. He was cool, I approved, but did that mean he could waltz back into my life here? Would he even want to? My eyebrows furrowed as my thoughts trailed off.

"What is it Bella?" Rose asked reading my face.

Nothing I just-...I just realized my mom won't be there," I spoke. The air seemed to have sucked out any noise possible. I swear if the house was going to collapse you wouldn't hear our calls.

Sam squeezed my hands as he gathered them in his. My eyebrows furrowed even more as I was trying to figure out how to feel about it. My mom wouldn't be there to see me in my wedding dress or smile at me as I walked down the aisle. She wouldn't even be there to help me get ready or tell me I was a lucky girl.

"Bella, how about we continue this later okay?" Sue asked putting a hand on my thigh.

"No I mean, its okay," I said as her contact with my skin pulled me out of my thoughts, " I just…thought it was weird," I said. Pushing aside my feelings, I told Sue to add him to the list. Whether he deserved it or not, Phil was still part my father.

"Okay, well then Sam, you are free to leave," Andrea chirped.

He hesitantly held me close, wondering if it was best for him to leave. Nodding, I gave him a peck on the lips.

"Take care of my girl," Sam grunted as he got up to the ladies. Tentatively, he dropped my hand and leaned down for another kiss.

"Love you," he murmured against my lips.

"Love you too, be safe."

"Always," he said and hustled off with a goodbye to everyone else.

"Bella?" Rose asked.

"Hmm?" I wondered looking to the laptop.

"You okay?"

"Yea," I said forcing a smile on my face. "What else?" I sighed clapping my hands together.

"Flowers," Andrea smiled.

We decided to go flower picking tomorrow, along with places to have the wedding.

"Maybe Sam should be included on that?" I asked Sue.

"If you would like," she said scribbling some notes.

"Well Bella, you didn't have a place in mind?" Sarah wondered.

"Not really, I haven't planned anything."

The imprints looked at me wide eyed. "What?" I wondered.

"I think I have had my wedding planned out for months," Sarah said.

"Mine has been ever since I met Jared," Kim giggled.

"I'm not that crazy," Andrea muttered. Letty, Sue, and I laughed the girls as some of them blushed.

"Bella, how about the after party on the beach?" Alice asked.

"Sure," I shrugged. "I think Sam will like that too."

"Good," Letty smiled.

"Did you want to get married in a church?" Andrea asked. I shrugged, I don't know where I could picture myself getting married. Was I a traditional type of girl? Or an outside girl? Maybe do something different…

"I guess I could see a church, yea," I said thinking it over. Alice squealed in excitement.

"Let me guess, you already found one near here."

She nodded vigorously, "two to be exact."

We all laughed again and had Sue write down the addresses.

"Bella Bean!" Emmett called over the webcam. I looked behind Rose and smiled, "hey Emmett! I miss you!"

"Miss you too! How you doin'?" he wondered.

"Good," I concluded.

"Emmett! Go away, we are planning Bella's wedding!" Alice hollered. The big teddy bear like vampire's eyes went wide and he said a quick goodbye to me.

"Bella," Alice said sweetly.

"What?" I wondered cautiously.

"Can I do your make up for your special day?"

"Of course," I smiled breathing in relief. Her questions and ideas were always a bit crazy. "Ahh! Thank you!" she shrieked.

"Does that mean I can do your hair?" Rose asked me.

"As long as it isn't some crazy updo," I smiled. She nodded and shined her bright pearly teeth at me.

"Oh Bella!" Esme said coming into the picture. "and what are you girls doing?"

"Wedding planning," I said.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "Mind if I join?"

"Of course," I smiled. She pulled up a seat and listened to us talk.

"So what else?" I wondered.

We picked out and planned so many things. I had a date to plan the invitations, the food menu, the bridesmaid dresses and even shopping for the rings. I described to Alice and Rose what I was thinking for the after party- strings of lights, a bon fire, light sounds of music. They said they would have it all planned and drawn out for me to approve. As crazy as it was, I was glad to get this all done. I didn't need this hanging over my head, especially being so close to the actual wedding date.

When dinnertime rolled around I said goodbye to my vampire family and closed all the wedding books the imprints had brought with them. Sue and Letty wanted to treat us to dinner and I was all for it.

"So Bella, we were thinking after ward, you could try on your dress," Letty said. I nodded hesitantly. Thoughts of my mom hit me again and I felt somewhat depressed.

"You okay?" she asked with her arm wrapped around my shoulders, "yea," I smiled. So we quickly ate at some casual restaurant and were off to Sue's.

"Seth, you have to leave," Kim said.

"why?" he asked while sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Bella is going to try on her wedding dress," Sue said to her son.

"aw, mom, why can't I see it."

"Pack mind," Sarah reminded.

"I can keep it a secret," he pleaded. I almost caved but all the girl's said no.

"sorry Seth," I sighed.

"It's alright Bells," he said giving me a quick hug as I walked him to the door. "I'm sure you'll look beautiful."

"Thanks," I blushed, shutting the door as he left. Walking further into the house, I saw Sue had the box already open. I went wide-eyed, staring at the beautiful material. Taking in a breath, I quickly stripped and got help putting it on.

"Woah," Sarah said.

"Bella," Sue and Letty said with teary eyes. "Is it okay?" I asked all of them.

"You look gorgeous," Kim said.

Andrea stepped back a few feet and took a picture, "for Alice, Rose and Esme," she smiled. I nodded and felt my heart pounding in my chest. "Can I see it…the picture I mean?"

She nodded and showed me. As I looked at the screen I was so shocked I almost fell over. That was me? I looked like that in this dress? Woah.

"I told you!" Alice said as she came on speakerphone with Kim. "Its perfect!"

I nodded and pushed down my emotions.

"How does it feel?" Sue wondered to me. I moved around a bit and shrugged. "Its okay, but it's long. And with me, I will trip," I said. Everyone laughed, "and it's thick so I might be hot at the beach."

"We can get you a different one if you don't like it Bella," Letty said.

"No, I do- like the dress I mean," I told everyone before Alice could say a word, "I just don't know about wearing it the whole night."

"How about we shop for a shorter one? Something more casual and cheap. That way you can change after you become Mrs. Sam Uley," Kim grinned. I smiled and somewhat beamed at the name.

"Alright," I said. After that, I changed back out of the dress and into my normal clothes.

"We need shoes!" Andrea said after we all began to lay around.

"We can get you some colored heels, ones that match the bridesmaid colored dresses," Sarah said thinking it over.

"Perfect," I said tiredly.

"I'll drive you home Bella," Sue said.

"You don't have to," I said, "I'll have Sam pick me up when he's done."

"Nonsense," she said waving off the thought, "I have to grocery shop anyways. Letty, girls, lock up when you leave," she said guiding me along with her.

We hopped into Sue's car with the radio softly playing. It had been a long day, full of wedding planning and chit chatting. I wonder what was in store next.

"Hey Sue?" I said softly.

"Yes Bella?" she said.

"I think of you as my mom too," I stated. "You and Charlie have grown real close and you've given me two siblings. I just want you to know, with this whole Renee thing…you're better than her."

"Oh Bella," she said tearing up. She pulled into the driveway. "You are too sweet."

"I'm just saying the truth," I said shyly. "You are more like a mother to me than Renee ever was. And I know I was upset today, but I want you to know that you hold a place in my heart as my mom too."

She smiled and leaned over to hug me. "You mother holds a special title. She raised you for a while and even though her definition of 'raise' might not be the same as mine, you lived with her for a while. It's okay to be upset that she won't be there for you on your special day. But thank you Bella, for telling me that. I think of you like my daughter too."

"I'll see you tomorrow Sue, and thanks for the ride," I said shutting the door. With a wave, I unlocked the house doors and went inside.

For a while I sat in silence on the couch, re-pondering the thoughts I had shoved to the side. Renee wasn't going to be there and that just weirded me out. I remember all of those times where she would tell me fairytales and say she couldn't wait for me to get married. She would be at the end of first pew, watching me as my dad gave me away.

"Bella?" a voice called. Glancing up, I saw Jake.

"Hey Jake," I smiled, sitting up.

"You okay?" he wondered.

"I'm getting asked that a lot today," I stated.

"Sam's worried about you," he said coming to sit next to me. "How is the wedding planning going?"

"Its crazy," I said. "I don't know how people get married more than once." He laughed and wrapped an arm around me.

"How are you holding up with your mom thing?" he asked.

I sighed and melted further in his shoulder. "It sucks, and I can't help thinking back to all those times when she was in my life. It's hard to think she wont be there- weddings were really her type of thing," I chuckled. He laughed and kissed my head.

"Well, you'll still have her in your heart," he said.

"I know, but it's not the same," I said, "She physically, wont be there to see me. And I never really thought of it before. She's never met Sam or heard of Sam. It just bothers me that I can't connect him in my life when I still had my mom."

Jake was silent.

"But then again, if Phil comes, it will partially tie him to my past," I grumbled.

"Yea, Phil," Jake said. "Think he will come?"

"Maybe," I shrugged, "we were close when Renee was alive, and hopefully he will put whatever emotions he had or has aside and see me get married- I'm only doing it once you know," I joked.

"I think I want to ask Sarah. Not now, but soon," Jake said prosperly.

"I think that's a good idea," I said thoughtfully.

"Have you met Sam's dad?" I asked my best friend as we were making random conversation.

"Nope," he said. "All really know about the man is he left Sam's life when Sam took alpha. It was too hard with two alpha males in La Push."

"Think he regretted his decision?" I wondered to Jake.

"I would hope so," Jake said. "Sam's a pretty great guy- and I don't just say that because I am part of his 'cult'," Jake joked. "He was raised well for having so many challenges in his life."

"Why are you here Jake?" I asked, trying not to offend my friend. "I had time and wanted to check on you. Embry was fighting to go instead of me, but Sam allowed me," he grinned. I rolled my eyes. "I hadn't spent time with Embry in a while."

"He'll come around sooner or later," Jake reassured.

Soon after our random talk we watched a movie or two before he and I fell asleep on the couch. Sam woke us up both a while later when he came home from patrols and I groaned when the DVD was playing the menu music on repeat.

"See ya Jake. Thanks for today," I mumbled tiredly, thanking Sam as he shut off the TV.

"Of course Bells," he said kissing my forehead before leaving the house.

"I heard you tried on your wedding dress last night," Sam said running his hands through my hair. We were sitting on the couch together, with my head in his lap as we waited for Letty and Kim to pick me up and start shopping.

"And that kid thought he could stay in the room to see me with it on," I laughed. He smirked.

"Did Alice pick the right dress?" he wondered.

"Yes and no. Actually speaking of which, I was thinking a wedding in a church and afterward to the beach with everyone?"

"okay," he said simply.

"Is that okay with you? I don't want you to feel like it has to be that way."

"I like it Bella," he said to me.

"Okay," I breathe getting comfy again.

"So, how are you with your mother thoughts?'' he asked tentatively. "I know Jake came by to talk to you about it…"

"It's okay," I sighed. "Like I told Jake, it's weird to think about. But I guess I'm holding up."

"You can talk to me more about it if you ever want to," Sam said softly.

"I know," I said looking up at him, "and I probably will, but as for right now, it's just strange she's not here to go through all of this with me. There's no calling her or asking her on what to decide. I mean, I have Sue for that which is great cause she is more like a mom than Renee ever was to me, but there's something about Renee that I miss."

Sam stayed quiet, just weaving his hands through my hair. I was in fact glad he didn't say anything. There was nothing he could do or verbalize that would really make me feel better. He couldn't bring back my mom and I couldn't either. It was just the way of life I guess.

There was a honk outside and I sat up. "that's my queue," I told him.

"Of course, I'll see you later baby, have fun."

Giving me a long passionate kiss, I nodded and grabbed my things from the kitchen. "Keep your phone by you, you may have some decision to make too."

"Okay," he laughed.

I walked outside joining all of the girls who were already situated in the car. Let the craziness begin…

I don't know why Sam didn't join me. As a matter of fact, I was cursing the man in my head for proposing to me right now. We had already stopped by the two churches, picking out which one to have our wedding at, and we even planned the date. October 5th. I know I said end of September but the only days the church that I picked was open for was September 8th and the 17th . Both of those I thought were too soon of dates, so we settled on October.

But anyways, we had done the church, settled a date, went ring shopping, picked out the invitations and even found me a short, cheap white wedding dress for the after party that Alice also approved of. (check profile page again). It was sweetheart neckline, strapless and white. It had this silver beading across my mid length and went a little above my knees. I thought it was really pretty, especially how the fabric was curved to my side in one area and went straight down the next.

Back to the matter at hand though, we were now flower shopping and the girls were going crazy. I wasn't sure the color I wanted my bridesmaid dresses to be, which hindered their flowering decisions but I wanted to wait for Leah. She was on double patrols today for all of the ones she had missing with Cole- and unfortunately they were only fair.

I, of course, could have asked for Sam to let her come with me instead but I felt like that was taking advantage of his power. So yet again, I was now cursing my fiancé in my head for letting me go with all of these crazy women. I think I was too involved with all of this estrogen. It wasn't normal for me to be hanging around all of these people in such enclosed areas.

"Bella! What about these?" Andrea said handing me a sample flower. They were gerbera daisies and not too expensive. That was another rule I laid down to everyone. I didn't feel like spending a bunch of money on flowers even though I didn't really have a budget (its not like I needed one). I didn't want to spend a ton of money on flowers that were soon to die a week later. So that was rule one; rule two was that there would be no roses. Roses were too classic and I felt like over used. So unless we really couldn't find anything I would have to cave and use them, but it was a last resort.

Nodding, I liked those and continued to search. We were at some outside flower market thing. It was family owned business, which made me like it even more. I liked the idea of giving someone else a profit who was just doing this type of thing to make a living and be happy- not some business or big company, that didn't really matter to me.

Stopping to check out these flowers, my eyes landed on here, long-stemmed wine-colored calla lilies. They were really pretty and I enjoyed their color.

"Those are pretty," Sue commented coming up beside me.

"yea, I like these. I think they would be a good color for my bridesmaids too."

"Nice thinking," She commented. As Letty gathered the girls again, I told her these were the flowers I wanted.

"So a bouquet of them?" Sarah asked.

"Bella, you need roses in there," Andrea added. I made a face.

"Bella, roses would look really pretty with them. It would full out the bouquet when you walk down the aisle," Kim said.

"Ladies," an older man, maybe in his 70s said coming up around us. He was wearing a blue jean jumper with a plaid shirt underneath. "anything I can help you with?"

"Yes, I would like to buy these for my wedding," I beamed. His face brightened. "Oh, well congratulations," he said.

"Thank you," I smiled. We talked prices briefly and the quantity. When it came back to the bouquet most of the girls were protesting again.

"So you don't want roses," the man, Jackson Leroy, who owned this place clarified as he listened to us females bicker.

"I feel like they are too over used in a wedding. I'm hesitant with them," I told the man with a bite to my lip.

"Well, I like to believe they are used so much in a wedding because they represent love. The thorns represent that the person's true love is strong, and has enduring passion. Now depending what color rose you chose from actually means different things, " he said with wiseness that reminded me of Uncle Billy.

I raised an eyebrow. "I thought they all meant love?"

"Oh no," Jackson laughed. "You are right that, that is what they symbolize for overall but each rose can mean something special. For example the red rose, which is bold and dramatic conveys respect and the creative spirit of love. Of course, it is also associated with romantic love. The yellow, take this one for example," he said moving us to the bucket of roses, "means friendship. Truly," he said squinting as he thought about it, "in Victorian times, it symbolized jealousy. Now though, it represents friendship, joy and even caring."

We all looked at the man surprised and I was happy everyone was now finally quiet. I had peace.

"May I continue?" Jackson asked, "I can get carried away with the insight of flowers and I don't mean to bore you lovely ladies."

"Oh you aren't," I said captivated. "It is amazing, I would love to hear more, if you are okay with that."

"Of course," he chuckled. He picked up the next flower. It was a pink rose. "These symbolize femininity and elegance. Now depending on the shade, they can also mean something. A deep pink conveys gratitude and appreciation, while a pale shade displays grace and gentleness, maybe even admiration and happiness."

I stared at the pink flower, wondering if it was really fitting enough to be in my wedding. "The white ones," Jackson Leroy continued, " signify truth and reverence, it sends a message of loyalty and says 'I am worthy of you.'" My eyebrows shot up and I liked that meaning. It fit. Sam and I were loyal, trying to work on truthfulness but we were always shocking each other and tried to be as worthy of each other as possible.

"by that look on your face young lady, I say I have just won you over," the owner joked. I laughed embarrassed and nodded, "I think so, but can you explain the rest?"

He smiled and nodded. "Orange roses, which are not too common here, symbolize enthusiasm and desire and then the lilac and purple ones, which I will admit are pretty rare here too, are thought to be almost mystical in nature. They hold the thought to be tied to enchantment. They express desire and even send a message of love at first sight."

My eyebrows raised again. That definitely fit Sam and I too.

"Bella Bella!" Rose said through web cam on Kim's phone. "Can we do both? Please? We can have the white ones in your wedding and the others at the after party? Please Bella, oh please?" she begged. Mr. Leroy laughed and I nodded, "okay Alice, but wont that all clash?"

"Oh Bella," she smiled, "you will have changed your dress, hair, and wiped off your make up. I'm sure we can pitch in a different flower color or two."

All of us laughing, I gave her the okay once again and she was off to talk with Rose and Esme some more.

As Sue took my card up to purchase the flowers for the wedding day, I stopped Jackson and asked him what those calla flowers that I picked out meant. "Well, I'm not surprised you picked them," he told me with a smile, "They indicate magnificence and beauty. Its a very traditional symbol of marriage, signifying it as a gift."

"Oh," I said shocked. That was pretty cool actually.

"You know, not many girls care to think about what their flower means to their wedding day, most people like what is pretty."

"I'm not most girls," I teased with a wink. He let out a deep chuckle and nodded. After flower shopping was done, I thanked Jackson Leroy and his wife Delia again, leaving with a smile on my face.