Surprise! Happy hump day readers!

twi-hard-twilight-addict asked us if there would be any more ink or piercings in the future and once we saw that question, well, we just had to give you this! Hehe.

Remember: This is a future take, so this has happened AFTER they have come back from their honeymoon :)

EPOV

He was ready.

He wanted to do this.

But it turned into him looking like a dog that was just about to have his balls chopped off at the vet's.

Okay, seriously, we'd been talking about it for ages. It started off harmlessly enough. I thought that it would be cool to get matching bands in ink under our wedding rings. He liked the idea.

Then he mentioned about getting piercings and matching jewelry. That was cool with me.

Then he kept asking about how it felt, to do the fucking with cock piercings.

I went into a full and very detailed explanation about how it felt and showed him a little, okay a lot, and not only what I felt but what he would feel.

He got the hint, obviously.

So anyway, here we were, weeks later and he was pacing up and down the street outside Bella's Ink & Bars.

If I didn't find him so damn adorable, I'd laugh.

"Jasper, you don't have to do this, I promise!" I fought hard to keep in the chuckle that was brewing.

His face was now green.

I shouldn't have found it cruel, but I couldn't help it. Mainly because this was all his idea.

"I want to do this, more than anything, but, it's my manhood!" He let out a noise that was between a whine and a whimper as he cradled his dick in his hands.

"And what a fine piece of manhood it is," I crooned as I shifted my ass so that it wouldn't go dead on me and shimmied up the hood of the truck. "Manhood that I thoroughly enjoyed swallowing down this morning. I can't wait till you've got steel in it, steel that is going to feel so incredible when you push into my ass... for you and for me. Come here," I said gently as I held out my hands to him. He took them slowly and over his shoulder I saw Bella smiling at us.

Oh yeah, I bet she was finding this funny.

I wasn't in a much better state when I had had my first one done. Okay, so I was nearly sick, but what do you expect when I was facing what I was.

"Hold still," Bella giggled as I flailed about on her bed, my jeans around my ankles.

"No way, Bella, absolutely not, get it away from me!"

"But I have to learn somewhere," she pouted her sickly little pout that I fell for every stinking time.

"No." I was a man, I was firm.

"Pleasssssse, Edward," she made the pout stronger and I caved.

"I need vodka and ice, STAT," I growled out with a huff for added effect.

"I have the ice already," she grinned, but I shook my head.

"I need ice for drink..."

A few minutes later, after she'd raided Charlie's liquor cabinet, she handed me my drink and got me to lie down on her tiny twin bed.

"If you even think about quitting your course after this, I'm going to hunt you down," I said a little too politely as she rummaged around in her little box of tricks, "and return the every stick you give me."

"I won't quit, I promise," she grinned again and I softened slightly.

After months of arguments and debates, she finally backed down and let me pay for her to go to college to study piercing and ink, but what she didn't know was that Charlie and I had seen a rundown store that would be perfect for her first little enterprise when she graduated in a couple of months.

Charlie didn't have much in the way of money, but between the pair of us, we bought it and were in the middle of getting it all ready and kitted out for her as a graduation present.

And I was currently lying on her bed, waiting to get my cock pierced. Her first test subject outside of the classroom.

I was pretty much screwed.

"Edward, stop getting it to twitch," she mumbled as she looked in her bag once more and…

"HOLY SHIT ON A STICK! Not a hope in hell if you think you're coming near me with that!" I cried out as I scurried up the bed.

The needle was fucking huge!

Like knitting needle huge!

"Don't be such a baby, now get back here and stop your cock from twitching, it's putting me off."

"It's not twitching, it's fucking shaking because it's scared and your clit would be scared too if it had a needle that big coming near it," I bit back.

She let out a soft giggle as she stood up by the side of the bed, undid her jeans and dropped them and her panties.

"No way!" I cried out as I actually sat up, pulled her towards me by the hips and took in what I saw.

"Oh hun, he's gonna whoop your ass if he ever sees that!" I chuckled.

In a beautiful calligraphy style font, were the words 'my daddy will kill you' right over her pussy. I'm not talking about just below her belly button, oh no, I mean right above her clit.

"If it scares any men away, then I know they wouldn't have the balls to deal with me anyway," she giggled as she pushed me back down on the bed and then got her clothes sorted out.

A few moments later, with me taking in huge gulps of Vodka and air in equal measures, she did it.

Heat radiated up and down my body as the pain hit.

"Fuck, shit, cunt, bollocks!" I cried out as she pulled out the needle and instantly put through a small ring.

"Aww, you big baby, would you like me to kiss it better?"

"Bitch."

I smirked as the memory faded and I returned my attention to my whimpering husband. "Jasper, you really don't need to do this," I said gently as I pulled him into my arms, but he shook his head.

"No, I do, but I know it's going to hurt and that's worse than the unexpected, right? I'm going to walk in there knowing it's going to hurt and I'm going to go in there anyway. What stupid person does that?" he asked and instantly paled before adding, "Not that you are in any way stupid sweetheart."

"Hey, I was the same and if you want a laugh, I'll let Bella explain to you what I went through," I chuckled as I guided him back slightly so I could slide off of the hood.

~(*)~

JPOV

Bella was sweet, with wicked tendencies, served up with a side of bitch.

Seriously, she was sweet and kind, but she had a quick mouth and loved to put Edward in his place, acting more like his wife than a friend. She was definitely more feisty with him here than when I'd first come by myself all those months ago.

"Quit slapping my hand away!" Edward whined as he reached for my hand again, only for it to be slapped yet again.

"I need his one-eyed anaconda to be soft and everytime you touch him, it twitches," she glared at him as he stuck his tongue out at her. "You don't want me to mess up and cause erectile damage to him do you?"

I didn't know if they were flirting or acting like brother and sister, but it was fun to watch... until she added those last words. The banter had certainly been helping me take my mind off of what she was going to do to me and the pain I was just about to go through.

"One-eyed anaconda, that's a new one," Edward chuckled as he pushed her away and grabbed my hand anyways.

"Oh yeah, I've been reading up on them, for research," she let out a little giggle as Edward rolled his eyes.

"Okay, fill me in," I smiled as Edward chuckled.

"When Bella went through school, she knew what she wanted to do as a job, but felt uncomfortable being around penises without feeling awkward, so we both came up with a growing list of cock and pussy names. Every time she felt uncomfortable, she would start reciting to herself the strange and funny names," he giggled like a schoolgirl as Bella glared at him.

"It wasn't just me that was uncomfortable, Edward. I distinctly remember you pleading with me to 'date' you in school because vaginas looked strange and wrinkly. Let me tell you something, Jasper, Edward, as in your husband… he was a nerd and a wimp in school. He had these thick black rimmed glasses, a side parting and pants hiked up to his armpits. It wasn't until the last year when I'd had enough of him looking like a Clark Kent wannabe that he finally had the girls chasing him and he came running to me. Obviously I knew that he preferred a thick cock over a wrinkled pussy because of the amount of gay porn we swapped, so I agreed to pretend to date him until we graduated," she laughed loudly as Edward shrank back into the small stool that he was perched on.

"You were a geek?" I purred softly as he gave me a nervous grin and I couldn't stop myself from picturing what he would look like in thick framed glasses and smartly dressed... clothes with lots of buttons that would slowly need to be undone...

"Jasper!"

Slap.

"What the hell was that for, Bella? My dick, really?" I argued back as I now tried to cover my shriveling dick. That shit hurt ya know!

"No getting hard unless I can join in," she growled playfully as she eyed my cock.

Edward laughed this time as I blanched.

After what we had done on our honeymoon, I would have no problem letting Bella watch. Maybe, some day, even join in a little, but not yet. We were still in our honeymoon phase and I wasn't ready to share Edward with anyone at the moment.

"Are you ready?" Bella asked with a smirk as she made a dramatic show of putting on her surgical gloves with a loud snap.

I gulped.

"No," I said quietly.

"Tough," she replied happily.

I rested my head back and close my eyes, waiting for the pain to start.

"Is it strange to see a woman's hands all over your husband's cock, Edward?" I heard Bella's voice as she started to touch me gently.

I heard a faint growl before a bit of a stretching and something cool, like metal, then... PAIN!

"…cum gun, heat-seeking moisture missile, meter long king kong dong, pink torpedo, purple-headed yogurt flinger…"

"I feel sick," I moaned out as my head pounded.

"Hey, welcome back, baby," I heard Edward's voice as he stroked my hair.

"Hey, hunk, you awake now?" Bella's voice giggled and then she continued, "The pussy ones are scarier… minge, sausage wallet, vertical smile…"

"I get it, Bella, but please, I feel sick enough as it is," I moaned again as my stomach churned.

"Yeah, he's been scarred enough by an Amazon Rain Forest," Edward laughed and if I had the strength, I'd have hit him.

"Oh please don't tell me she never shaved! Oh, Jasper, you really need to be educated better. I can show you any time you guys want me to."

Even with my eyes shut I could hear the smile in her voice.

"Let me heal first, please?" I chuckled a little.

"Talking about healing, Edward knows how to keep it all clean and stuff, so I don't need to lecture you on it, but you do have to let it heal before you can do any extracurricular activities… so no sex for at least six weeks."

"WHAT?"

"WHAT!" I screeched as I gave over to my stomach and shared my lunch with the she devil from Hades.

Hehe, I know, we're cruel… but you love us :)

So… we still need more questions for our Q&A session with the boys and of course more ideas for outtakes and future takes.

Until next time,

TB &TER

xXx