Kaidan woke to find Shepard's side of the bed empty again. He was disappointed in the thought that this was becoming a regular occurrence. It took him a few seconds to realise that the bathroom door was open a crack and the light was on.

He walked over, and opened the door quietly to see Jane sitting on the floor, close to the toilet, propped up against the wall with her eyes closed, and her hand on her stomach.

"So, does this mean you aren't one of the lucky ones after all?," he said, trying to stay quiet and disturb her as little as possible.

"I guess not," she groaned.

"I'm surprised it didn't wake me up."

"I didn't actually throw up. I thought I was going to, but I couldn't, and now the feeling just won't go away!"

He sat down beside her, and wrapped his arm around her. "Is there anything I can do?"

"No, I think I'm just going to have to wait for it to become tolerable."

"Okay, well it's still a little early. I don't think anyone should need either of us for a bit, so I can just wait with you."

"Thanks."

She was trying not to focus on it, so she figured now would be a good time to talk to Kaidan.

"So, I've been thinking…"

"What about?"

"I think I finally know for sure that I want to accept Hackett's offer. It was already starting to feel like the right decision before, but then as soon as I found out that I'm pregnant, I keep thinking that it's the best option for us right now. A job at an Alliance HQ would be secure, and I wouldn't be put at risk. It's mostly a desk job which means it'll be more easily manageable. Neither of us would be required to ship out very often, so we can have a stable home. The more I think about it, the more it sounds kind of perfect."

"Okay. I think I like the sound of that too. I'm sure Hackett will have something for me to do there."

"He did say he would figure something out for you too, if that was all that was keeping me from the position."

"Good to know. If that's what you want, then it's what I want too. It sounds like I have a lot of good options for myself there, and the most important thing to me is that we'll get to be a family. Staying together on the Citadel seems kind of perfect."

With that off of her chest, she started leaning her head towards him, trying to cuddle up beside him. She inhaled deeply, how she normally would, so she could feel at home, and close to him, but it seemed to be having the opposite effect on her. Suddenly she was lurching for the toilet and heaving immediately.

Kaidan went to help hold her hair out of the way of her face, and rub her back. As he got closer to her, she just pushed him away, as she heaved again. He didn't want to leave her alone, so he just backed up and waited for it to be over. As she finished, he thought he heard a whimper in the toilet bowl.

"Jane? What's the matter?"

"Your smell just made me throw up," she said, clearly upset.

He immediately lifted his arms to smell if he had forgotten deodorant recently or something.

"No, you don't smell bad. Just something about it made me throw up." She wiped away a tear that had started to roll down her cheek. She wasn't sure if it was from the force of vomiting, or from being upset about the cause. It really could have been either.

Kaidan felt awful that he couldn't go to hug her immediately. All he wanted to do was comfort her. "Hey, hey it's alright. We can figure something out. I'm sure we won't have to be quarantined away from each other or anything. I had a shower right before bed last night, maybe it's my soap. I'll go see if Dr. Chakwas has any of that unscented stuff. Maybe while I'm there, I'll ask her if she has any suggestions. Don't worry. Do you think you'll be okay?"

"Yeah, I think so. I just don't want to be forced away from you. Especially not now."

"I know. It's killing me to not come over there and hug you right now."

"It's not your fault."

"I still don't like it. I'll go see her now. The sooner we can fix this, the better."

"Thank you. Oh, before you go, I think I'm going to tell Liara today."

"Already? We haven't even told our families yet."

"I know. But, you know… she is the shadow broker. It would be nice if she heard it from one of us first. I still don't exactly want to go spreading it around, but even without all of her equipment up and running, she's pretty resourceful."

"That's a good point. Okay, just let me know if you do, so I'll know if I can mention it in front of her."

"Will do," she said as she finally stood up to rinse her mouth out.

He was still struggling not being able to say goodbye without hugging her after what had just happened. "I love you."

"I love you too, Kaidan. I'm sorry."

"Don't say that. You have nothing to be sorry about. You can't help it, and besides, I'm the one who got you in this position in the first place. If anyone should be apologizing, it's me."

"Don't you dare apologise for this. I may not be very happy with this particular side effect, but it's for a good reason."

"See, now you know how silly you sounded saying sorry."

"Hmm. I guess you have a good point," she said smiling at him.

"I know I do," he said cheekily. "But I'm going now, and as soon as I've showered, I'm coming to find you and give you that hug."

"Okay. I'm looking forward to it."

It had taken another half hour for Jane to be sure that she wasn't going to vomit again the moment she stepped out of her cabin.

Still not trusting herself fully, she decided to bypass the mess hall, ignoring breakfast for now, and heading straight for Liara's office. Before she entered however, she couldn't help but notice Gabby and Ken in Dr. Chakwas' office. The small smile spreading across her face was inescapable as she was contemplating the possibility of blueberry getting a cousin in the near future. Even after the morning she had just had, she couldn't remember the last time she had been this happy, even though her life had admittedly been heading more and more in that direction as of late.

As she finally made her way into Liara's office she was stunned by the silence that greeted her. There was usually so much tech running that sometimes Jane wondered how Liara managed to hear herself think, much less do all the work that she did. It was usually so loud that it managed to drown out the already loud noises of the ship most of the time. Not only that though, but Glyph had always been there to greet her. It wasn't quite the same at all but sometimes Jane thought of him as Liara's faithful puppy. Her little annoying, blue, talking, floating puppy. She couldn't help but miss his cheerful greeting this time. She was surprised that she was still learning the full extent of the damage she had caused with the crucible. As it turns out it didn't take very long to thwart at least a little bit of her earlier happiness away.

The sound of clanging and huffs of frustration coming from the far side of the room brought her out of her thoughts. She could see Liara's feet sticking out from behind some crates by her personal terminal. Jane walked over to observe that she was under her desk clearly trying to fix something.

Liara seemed to notice the fact that she had been covered by a shadow and looked up to see that Shepard had been watching her. She stood up quickly and brushed herself off. "Sorry Shepard. I guess I was so focused on this, I didn't even hear you come in."

"No problem. I can imagine you've got a lot of work to do to get things back up and running."

"As does everyone, I suppose."

"True enough."

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure? Just coming to check in on me?"

"Not exactly. I have a bit of a secret to share."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with you giving up the Normandy would it?," Liara asked with a cocky smile.

Shepard stared at her open mouthed for second before responding, "How did you know about that?"

"I know I don't exactly have all of my resources at my disposal at the moment, but I am still the Shadow Broker. I'd like to think I'm still a good one at that."

"Hmm. Well apparently."

"So, it's true?"

"Yes. Seriously though, who blabbed?"

"Don't worry, they were being discreet, but it was Gabby and Ken. I don't think they knew I have the feeds working again from the public areas of the ship. They were discussing it down in Engineering while no one else was there."

"Well it doesn't make that much of a difference anyway. I'm going to announce it later. Give people a chance to figure out what they want to do before we get back to Earth."

"Mmm. I have to say, I'm not all that surprised."

"No?" Shepard tested, wondering if Liara may know more than she first let on.

"It's been about 4 years now since we've met hasn't it? In that time, you've basically performed 3 suicide missions. Forgetting how ludicrous of a statement that is in itself, the only thing that ever stopped you was dying, and then, well, very nearly dying again. Your career may not have been quite that drastic before we met, but it certainly was no walk in the park either, with what you managed to pull off with Elysium, and going through N7 training. I know that being a soldier and a leader is what you've excelled at, but quite frankly, with your service record and with the sacrifices that you've had to make, I think I would have been more surprised if you weren't going to consider taking things in a bit of a different direction."

"When you put it like that, I guess you can't really blame me for wanting a bit of a career change, and to try to look forward."

"No, I certainly can't. But also knowing you as your friend means I know that despite this being what you want, and knowing that this is what's best for you, I also know that this can't be easy for you either."

Jane let out a huff and walked towards the window by Liara's bed, crossing her arms in front of her chest, while rubbing them as though she were cold. "I suppose you do know me fairly well," she said as her tone became a bit more quiet and contemplative. "I haven't exactly told a lot of people yet, but everyone I have told so far has just been happy for me. It says a lot that you're the only one who's been sad for me too. Don't get me wrong. I am happy about this decision. I'm making it for myself for once, but you're right, it doesn't mean it's going to be easy for me either. I feel like I'm going to be leaving my family behind."

"Here I was, thinking that you had just become taken with bossing people around," Liara said playfully, trying to lighten the mood a little bit.

Shepard scoffed with feigned indignation, "Who, me?"

Liara smiled at her. "This shouldn't need to be said, but I'm going to say it anyway. Anyone who has ever served on the Normandy would do anything for you. You've always cared for your people, and proven it through your actions, and by being there to listen or help whenever they've needed it. Goddess knows you've been there for me. No matter how hard you tried, you could never leave your family behind. We'll just be a bit more scattered than you're used to."

"You're right. I know you're right. I guess it's just something I'll have to get used to. I've lived on ships my whole life. I've always been surrounded by family and people. I guess the idea of it just feels a little bit lonely." Shepard moved to sit on the edge of Liara's bed, and looked at the floor before continuing. "Do you miss glyph?"

Liara was slightly taken aback by the question. "I have to admit, I think I took him slightly for granted. He was certainly more help than I had given him credit for, and I think I was leaning on him more than I had realised, but all things considered I really don't think it will take much to get him back. Especially now that we're not stranded and I'll be able to acquire the resources fairly easily when we get back to Earth or the Citadel. He was only a VI after all. It's not like the Geth, or EDI."

Jane visibly flinched at the mention of the AI's, as she hunched over resting her forehead on her hand. She had been working through a lot of her guilt with her therapist. It had helped a lot, but her currently sad state was bringing the feelings back again.

Liara quickly came to sit at her side, and placed a reassuring hand on her back. "I'm so sorry, Shepard. I didn't mean to bring them up like that or insinuate any blame in what happened to them."

Shepard wiped away a tear that threatened to be shed. "It's okay. I know that's not how you meant it. I just miss EDI. Sometimes I still wonder if I made the right choice."

"Please try not to dwell on it, Shepard. I know it's hard, but I wish you could see everything that has gone right with your decision as easily as the things you see that have gone wrong with it. You may not have been able to save everyone, but you saved the galaxy. That's not a small feat."

Shepard just nodded. Logically, she knew that Liara was right. No matter what, the decision had been made, and there was no going back now, but the consequences of choosing to destroy the Reapers were still fresh to her, and they were likely something that she would never be able to let go of fully. They sat together for a few moments in silence before Shepard let out a small huff of a laugh as she shook her head.

"What?," Liara asked.

"I just remembered something your mother once said."

"What's that?," she asked, genuinely intrigued now.

"She said, 'There's power in creation… To shape a life. Turn it towards happiness or despair.'"

As Shepard was silent for a pause, Liara could see that, in a vague sense, there were parallels between that and their conversation, but was still confused and struggling to see where this was going.

"I'm pregnant," Jane said, and was immediately mad at herself for sounding more disappointed than she had planned or wanted to. This was supposed to be a happy revelation.

Liara simply gasped and stared at her wide eyed.

"Does this mean I finally managed to surprise you with something?"

"I suppose it does. Goddess, Shepard, this is wonderful news. Are you not happy?"

"What if I didn't think this through, Liara? Your mother was right. There is power in creation, and I don't know if it's a power that I deserve. How am I supposed to be responsible for turning this life towards happiness after the life I've had, and the things I've seen. I'm responsible for so much death, how can I be responsible for a life?"

"How can you say that, Shepard? You are responsible for far more life than death at this point."

"You know what I mean, though. Not everything I've done is a good thing."

"Do you honestly think any parent would be capable of saying otherwise?"

"I guess not. But I don't feel like it's the same thing. All I know is the military. The only thing I'm good at is taking lives."

"I think it's odd that you see yourself that way, because I would be inclined to say that you're good at saving them. Do you remember Major Kyle? You went in there with diplomacy and tact and managed to save everyone because you refused to accept that killing them all was the only option. What about when you became a war hero? I know you weren't able to save everyone on Elysium, but without your strength and determination, none of them would be around today. You care so much about life that you might be the only soldier I know that will only take a life after being absolutely certain that death is the only answer."

"I'm not trying to trivialize what it must be like having to live with a lot of the decisions that you've had to make," Liara continued. "I know it isn't. I'm just trying to help you see the other side of that coin. The good and the bad share the same place in your heart, but you never want to flip the coin over and see the beauty that the other side has to offer. I just don't want to let the dark memories consume you."

"You're right," Jane said, taking a moment to really try to take in what Liara was saying.

"So? Are you feeling better?," she asked, rubbing Jane's back reassuringly.

"I guess a little bit. I don't know though, Liara. Am I really cut out for this?"

"Why wouldn't you be? Are soldiers not allowed to be mothers?"

"Of course they are, but I would hardly say that I'm any normal case."

"No, maybe not, but that doesn't change the fact of who you are. You've always had a nurturing way about you. I still think back fondly to the times that you brought me on to the SR1. I was so young and naive back then. I wasn't a soldier, and I was scared, but you were always there for me, and would always come check on me to make sure I was okay. You were there for me when my mother died. And I'm hardly an exception. You've done this for all of your crew."

"Maybe. But it's still not exactly the same. You were all adults just looking for comfort or guidance. It's different than being entirely responsible for somethings happiness and well being."

"I know it's probably not much of a consolation, but I think the fact that you're worried about this is probably a good thing isn't it? It means that you care."

Shepard just let out a sigh, she knew Liara was trying to help, and it had to a certain degree. She wasn't exactly sure what she wanted to hear. She was just full of self doubt, and likely the only thing to make it pass would be time. Maybe it would never fully go away.

"I'm sorry I don't have more to offer you, Shepard," she said while resting her hand on Jane's shoulder gently. "I'm not exactly well versed in the field of child rearing either."

"It's okay, Liara. You have actually helped a lot. And please don't get the wrong idea either. This is a good thing. I don't doubt that, and I am really happy. I guess I'm just afraid that I have no idea what I'm doing. It's just so permanent, and that scares me."

"I think that's probably fairly normal, isn't it? I think I would be too. It's not like you only have to feel one way about this. I'm sure you're absolutely ecstatic, but that doesn't mean you're not allowed to be scared."

"Doesn't it? I can just see the headline now, 'Admiral Shepard… Scared of a baby'."

Liara smiled at her joke, "Well, it's a big responsibility. I think it's entirely justified to be feeling this way. But at any rate, you're not alone. You've already created this large, crazy family of misfits. We may be a bit more dispersed than before, but we're all here for you. Not to mention your other half. He's the one that got you into this mess, why aren't you leaning on him right now?"

Shepard chuckled. "Because he makes me throw up right now."

"Ah. I believe I've heard about that before. Morning Sickness is it?"

"Yes. I was hoping I would skip out on that symptom. No such luck, I guess."

"I'm sorry. That can't be pleasant. And forgive me, I didn't mean to make it sound like I was trying to pawn you off onto Kaidan. I just meant that you have other people to be relying on too. I'll always be there for you when I can. I may not have much advice about this particular topic, but I'll always be around to listen, or help. I hope you know that."

"Thank you. And I know. You're the only one we've told yet, you know."

"I'm flattered."

"Good. You should be," she said with a smirk.

"For what it's worth, I know you will be a good mother. I know just hearing it likely isn't enough, but it's true. Even if everything else I said isn't already any kind of indication as to what kind of parent you'll be, you simply don't fail. At anything. This will be no exception."

Shepard finally laughed out loud at that one. "Okay. You're right. I'm too stubborn to be bad at it. I guess that at least makes me feel a little bit better."

Liara smiled, glad that she was at least able to ease Shepard's tensions, but now she was the one looking solemn.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

Liara let out a sigh before continuing. "I think the wisdom that comes with age can just be a little bit soul crushing sometimes."

"Care to elaborate?," Jane said, genuinely interested in what could have changed Liara's mood so much.

"We've already discussed this to some degree. While we were in the middle of the war, I was afraid of being so young and what that meant for me. That I could very well have lived to see the cycle end had we lost."

"I remember. You said that you used to think that it was sad that most aliens lived such short lives."

"Yes. And that maybe it's not such a privilege to outlive so many. I've already had to come to terms with the fact that I will likely outlive you all. That is incredibly saddening in and of itself, but something that all Asari have to come to terms with. I guess your little secret has made me consider this in an entirely new light. Not only will I likely outlive you, but I could very well live to see more than 20 generations of your lineage."

The sheer number of that had made Jane's face contort in morose thought. It had certainly put their stark differences in a new perspective, and it made her feel bad for her friend.

"When you put it like that… well. I don't envy you. It's hard living with loss. I can't even fathom having to live with it on such a grand scale. I guess that's something entirely out of my scope now."

"It's okay. It's an unfortunate part of life. I'm sure I will learn to cope. Nevertheless, this is truly a blessing, Shepard. I cannot wait to meet the newest member of our little Normandy crew, even if we won't technically be on the Normandy any longer."

Shepard had been looking out over all of the Shadow Broker's equipment as Liara had finished her last statement. It had given Jane an idea.

"Actually, I might have a bit of a proposition for you. We'd have to talk to Hackett of course, but maybe we could arrange some sort of deal. You need a new base of operations, and I'm sure the Alliance could benefit from your 'information brokering'. If we can get Hackett to see that it would be a benefit, maybe we could get him to forfeit the Normandy to the MWII. It was the first vessel that was created as a combined effort between species. Even though this is technically the Cerberus version, I don't think he could deny that the symbolism is perfect."

Liara mulled it over for a moment. "Hmm. That might actually work. I would have to change the way I operate to some degree, however. I haven't exactly been running at full capacity ever since Cerberus caught up to me. The Normandy isn't capable of housing everything I'd need, so I would likely have to be operating out of more than one location. I would likely need a second in command if that were the case. You've given me something to consider, Shepard. I think I quite like the idea."

"Well, in that case, I'll go ahead and set up that meeting then," she said as she got up to leave. "But, in the meantime, I think I have an announcement to make."

"Good luck, Shepard. The crew will miss you, but I know they'll be happy for you too. They'll understand you wanting to leave."

"Thanks, Liara," she said as she left.

She immediately went up to the cockpit so she could use the ship wide speakers. Kaidan was there talking to Joker, and Jane couldn't help but see that he was purposely keeping his distance. He must not have had a chance to see Chakwas yet, since she was busy with Gabby and Ken.

"Hey, Kaidan. I talked to Liara."

He just nodded his head with a smile.

"You should also know that I'm about to make the announcement," she said as Kaidan quickly shot his glance up to hers. "About the job," she quickly amended.

"Oh. Yeah, that's probably a good idea."

"Uh oh. Why do you guys sound so ominous up there," Joker broke in.

"Because I'm about to announce my leaving the Normandy."

"Oh, no shit. Well, to be honest, I'm not all that surprised. I mean I am a little, but you're an admiral now. Not many admirals run frigates. If anyone would have been an exception, it would have been you though."

Jane smiled at that. "Yes, well I've decided to take my roll as admiral seriously. I'm going to be working at Citadel HQ."

"Sounds like a good gig, Shep. I'm going to miss you. Mostly because you let me get away with a lot of stuff."

"Riiight."

"No, but really. I think you'll make a great admiral. Things won't be the same around here. Oh man, I guess that's even if they let me keep flying. Now you just bummed me out."

"Well, that's a big reason why I'm announcing now. I'm going to officially give everyone two weeks of shore leave after this to hopefully give everyone enough time to figure things out. Anyway, Joker, can you patch me through to the ship please?"

"Sure thing," he said pressing a couple of buttons and signalling to her that it was ready.

"Attention all Normandy crew. This is Admiral Shepard announcing that as of the end of this tour, I will no longer be in command of the Normandy. I will be granting everyone two weeks of shore leave to allow you to find new placement. If anyone needs letters of recommendation, I will be more than happy to do so. If you have specific placement requests, let me know as soon as possible so I can get the paperwork in order. I would like to take this time to personally thank each and every one of you. I know not everyone has been here since the beginning, but you have all helped make the Normandy a home over the last few years. It's been a pleasure serving with you all. Shepard out."

"That was good, Jane," Kaidan said, as he tried to move forward to give her a hug, but had to stop himself.

She nodded to him sympathetically. She was still thankful for the thought, but she hated that he had to do that.

"I guess I better go address all the questions," she said, turning to leave.

"Goodbye, blueberry," Kaidan said, before she could do so. It was like in the absence of being able to comfort her he was trying to antagonize her, but his sweet innocent smile meant that she couldn't be mad at him. He was playing with fire trying to bring up the baby in public, but at the same time she figured it was his way of being able to address it while still keeping it a secret. She decided to just let him have it, as she shook her head and laughed.

"Ugh, you guys are disgusting! Take that mushy crap out of my cockpit already. And seriously, Kaidan? Blueberry? You couldn't come up with anything better than that for your wife?," Joker said, berating them as she walked away shaking her head again.

On her way out, she received a lot of "Thanks for your service's" and "You were the best commander I ever had". She was grateful for these people for a lot of reasons. She would miss them all, but now was time for a new chapter in all of their lives.