Fight Fear With Fire
Sorry about the slow update. I've been busy making previews for my stories on YouTube. I'd love it if you guys checked it out. I have one for this story, it's the first I've ever made. I also have three previews for my upcoming horror story: Leena. I used the girl from Orphan and the guy from Jeepers Creepers (he plays Stan!) for my previews. I just want to tell you, that I'm not much of a video maker, so they kind of suck. Add me as a friend if you'd like. My username is kylexcartmanfan918. Type that into YouTube search to get my vids.
To Xxforget-me-notxX: Thanks! I really love that song too! It's my favorite out of all the review songs I've written. Oh my god, I loved when he took his hat off in that episode too! He was all swinging those sexy locks around and I was like drooling. Robot? Of course not, silly, the only robot in the world is A.W.E.S.O.M-O! Darry loves you too. *Darry+You hug* School is nasty. Lol, I read through all of the reviews, and a lot of you people said something about the popcorn. You people notice weird things. At first, I was like 'What are you talking about' and I had to reread my own chap to see it. Kyle in a little green suit… with tights to show off his nice ass. Aw yeah, that is my new mind-screensaver. Lol, "…no?" Yes. Chapter says thanks, Story says thanks, and I say thanks. Thanks 3x!
To Kiakamon: Thank you! It's great to know I make people cry. :D Haha, well, some of these fanfic people are a bit… insane. *points to self* Lol, but Stan may never have to drink Ky's blood again, except out of a vial. They don't do mouth to mouth all the time, that'd be kinda weird. Kyle reading Stan's mind… I wish I could say but I can't so I won't. I still have to deal with that damn author-supersexyjewboy confidentiality agreement. Or something like that. It took me a while to think of someone for Kyle to scream about. I tried spiderman, but I already mentioned spidey in this fic, I tried Demetri Martin, but I don't know if many people know him, and Ashton Kutcher came out of nowhere. Well, at least they're near hundreds of medically trained wizards, that must help a bit. But not with the I.Q. points poor Stan was forced to lose. Lol, you liked the song too! 2 votes for SPRS (south park review song) heh, I wish it'd be the theme. I'd be rich. Look no further, here's an update! Thanks!
To Hazel-Beka: I am trying on the Pegapenguins, but it's haaard! Once I get it, I'll post it on like DeviantArt or something. See? You mentioned the popcorn too! Read Xxforget-me-notxX's review response, line 5. lol. Jurassic Park is a favorite of mine! But the pet dinosaurs are friendly! If you're suicidal, they'll help you out! Oh, that's just ONE room of their HQ! I need to put a Hot Topic in there. I LOVE Hot Topic! And eh, I think Kyle's just a bit desperate. They just singed his jewfro, for Merlin's sake! I don't think anyone except Kadira is bright in this fic. And Kady's brightness shines in this chap. Kyle + Elf Suit + Tights = My new Mind-Screensaver! Kyle is just awesome like that. He's awesome without even knowing it. I laughed at the mental image of Dumbles picking at his teeth with the "homicidal toothpick" Kyle has a bad feeling about something, he's not being very clear with us, is he? I WANNA HUG KYLE! KYLE GO PUT ON YOUR ELF TIGHTS AND I'LL GIVE YOU A BIG HUG! Vampire Blood Infection? I love that! That's the new name! Or do you have it copyrighted. I'll call it VBI for short! Or we could call it… Vampire Blood Interaction Infection (VBII) That's fun to say! And my offer still stands; if he puts on the tights, I'll squeeze him like a teddy bear. Kyle and Stan both are kind of random when it comes to ideas. Heh, I'm just easily frustrated… THERE'S HAIR ON MY HEAD! MOVE, DAMN IT!… yeah… lol Well, check out the preview on youtube to get a little taste of the story, which by the way, will be titled "Leena." Thanks!
To JoyHeart: Umm… I will nod at certain points so it looks like I know what the heck you're saying. Naw, I'm kiddin. I know where you're comin from. I totally been there.
Okay, So, there's my reviews. I will once again remind you to type kylexcartmanfan918 into Youtube, and you will find my vids.
Chapter Twenty-Five: Darius Is A Crouton- Darius, Kady, and Aaron finally arrive at the wizard HQ, but have to wear jewelry and chew teeth-staining gum. Ew.
"Just land!" Darius shouted at the Pegasus, who was circling over the wizard HQ, "Every moment counts!"
Artemis didn't listen. "I need to make sure we get a good parking space," she told him briskly.
"Art- you can fly away as soon as you land. We'll call you if we need you!"
"I don't know how to answer my calls!" Artemis cried, "My new voice machine brain implant is…"
Darius groaned loudly. "If you don't land this fucking minute, I'm going to shove your stupid boyfriend up your ass!"
Mozart's beak twitched. "Please do."
"Jesus Christ!" Darius exclaimed, "I'll shove a pencil up your ass, then! MOVE!"
Artemis irritably sped toward the ground, galloping for a few moments before landing. "I'm gonna stay right here."
Darius rolled his eyes. "Are you retarded? If they see you, we won't have a ride home."
"I'm gonna stay right there," Artemis corrected, flicking her tail toward a large cluster of trees.
"You do that," Darius said, and turned around, "'Kay guys, let's go save some asses!"
Kadira and Aaron looked at each other before following. They were quite annoyed from hearing Darius talk to the animals, but not knowing what the animals were saying. It was like listening to someone talk on the phone- very annoying.
Kadira looked both ways before pulling Aaron and Darius into a corner behind the tall building. "Okay, put these on."
Darius eyed the plastic bracelets Kadira was holding out. "Kady… bracelets are for girls."
"I have seen boys wear them."
"Have you seen boys wear pink ones?"
Kadira paused. "It is not pink, it is a neon lavender. Just put it on!"
Darius reluctantly took the pink plastic loop, Aaron following his lead. They slipped them onto their fingers. "So what do they do?" Darius asked, "Make us invisible?"
Kadira shook her head. "No. They make us unnoticeable. When we wear these, nobody looks our way. Nobody asks us questions."
"Why didn't you just get invisibility bracelets?" Darius asked.
"These were on sale," Kadira snapped. She rolled her eyes and turned the corner, confidently approaching the large, golden door. Darius and Aaron were more cautious, seeing all of the wizards walking around and not even looking their way. They finally caught up to Kadira, who said, "Do not run into anybody. These bracelets are not the same as the other inconspicuous objects."
Aaron turned to her. "What are the other inconspicuous objects?"
"Oh, they have everything," Kadira said pleasantly, "Hats, shirts, gloves, shoes, underwear, even maxi pads and…"
"Okay, okay, don't share anymore!" Darius interrupted, "If they have gloves, why the hell did you get bracelets?"
Kadira rolled her eyes again. "Did you not hear me? These were on sale. The only other things on sale were inconspicuous bras, and I really doubted that you would want those."
"Thank you," Aaron said appreciatively.
Kadira nodded at him kindly. Darius scoffed. "Okay, why are you always so nice to him? I try and be nice to you… kind of! And you always treat me like you're smarter than me!"
"Well, I am," Kadira said bluntly.
"Yeah, but that's not the point," Darius snapped, "You're a smart-ass bitch!"
"And you are a agitating, ignorant, cretin"
Darius turned to her. "Did you just call me a crouton?"
"My point exactly," she muttered, pulling open the large door and revealing a large lobby behind it.
Aaron looked around in awe. "Damn, they have hot secretaries!" Kadira glared at him, and he blushed. "I mean, they're secretaries are hot compared to ours. Come on, Kady, we have crumbly old ladies!"
Darius snorted. "Crumbly old ladies?"
"You heard me," Aaron replied shortly.
"Would you two please keep it down?" Kadira said irritably.
Aaron looked around. "But you said no one will notice us."
"Yes, but you are getting on my last nerve, so quiet!"
The two men sighed and let Kadira walk ahead of them. She walked briskly past small doors labeled with their inhabitants such as "Witch Doctor M.D." and "Merlin's Toys: Stupid Spoiled Whore Playset- Wizard Edition Now Available!"
Darius was quickly distracted by "Pleasurable Potions- Give Your Partner The Time Of Their Life."
Aaron grabbed his arm and dragged him away, reminding him that he had no partner to pleasure.
Kadira completely ignored them, quickly heading toward the large bronze doors ahead.
"She sure seems to know where she's going," Darius whispered.
Aaron shrugged. "I don't know. It's Kady, dude. I think she knows everything."
"She doesn't know everything," Darius argued, "She just thinks she does. She thinks she's the best damn thing on this whole planet. You know, that's why no one likes her and everyone likes me! It's because I'm fun."
Aaron snorted. "Dude, when Kady was getting her award for best vamp of '23, you were sorting through death threats you got from mom!"
"Fuck you!"
"Mommy likes me better," Aaron sang.
"Shut up! She just didn't understand me!" Darius argued, crossing his arms.
Kadira opened the bronze doors, and two people ran out, looking agitated. "Shit!" Darius whispered. "That's Percy and Eric! The ones who attacked us!"
"They looked pissed," Aaron noted.
"Looks like Stanley and Kyle escaped."
Darius grinned. "Those two kick ass."
Kadira slipped through the door, followed less gracefully by Aaron and Darius. There were two hallways on either side of them. "Damn. Which way do we go?"
"Kady, can you use the Hot n' Cold necklace temporarily for this?" Aaron asked.
"I guess I could," Kadira said, pulling it out of her coat pocket. She held it in her hand and walked to the edge of one hallway. "No," she muttered, crossing to the other one. "They are this way."
Darius and Aaron high fived. "This is easier than I thought it'd be!"
"It will be more trying soon," Kadira said.
"Right little ray of sunshine, aren't you, Kady?" Darius said.
She rolled her eyes yet again. "You have used that phrase before. It really is not meaningful anymore."
"I am just strolling along here, trying to be happy, and you are just being a negative…"
"This way!" Kadira suddenly explained, turning a sharp corner. She stopped suddenly, and Aaron and Darius ran into her back.
Darius looked at Kadira like she was insane. "Uh… Kady? This is a wall."
"Yes, and these are wizards," Kadira replied distantly, "They refuse to have only doors, that would be too easy. Did you notice any security in the front of the building?"
The two men shook their heads. "No, just around the shops."
"Precisely, because all of the paths to the important places are sealed off like this."
Aaron sighed. "Then how do we get through?"
Kadira was staring at the wall with deep concentration. "Let me think." She ran her hand along the wall, her long fingers feeling for creases or bumps that were out of the ordinary. After not finding anything with her hands, she stepped forward and pressed her forehead against the cold wall, whispering Latin phrases under her breath. Nothing happened.
"Maybe there's a password or something," Aaron suggested.
Kadira nodded, considering the thought, but her nods soon turned into shakes. "I doubt it, actually. Think about this. Thousands of people would be forced to remember a single phrase."
"I guess that's kinda unrealistic," Darius agreed. "Maybe it's like Diagon Alley in Harry Potter. Maybe you just tap it in a certain place and…"
"Darius! That is brilliant!"
"Well, fuck you! It was just a suggestio… wait, what?"
Aaron grinned. "She said it was brilliant."
Kadira searched her coat pockets again until she pulled out a pack of what looked like gum.
"Gum? What, are you stressed?" Darius asked.
"No, of course not," Kadira said, popping one of the navy blue pieces into her mouth, "This is a fingerprint revealer. Humans have something similar, I believe. It just brings out the fingerprints on the wall." She leaned up to the wall again and opened her mouth. Steam-like navy clouds came out of her mouth and spread across the wall. Moments later, many finger-shaped dots were littering the wall. "Perfect."
There was a cluster of fingerprints on four different places. "How do we know which order to touch them in?" Aaron asked.
"Look, there are four of them in a row," she pointed at each little cluster, "I believe that the order in which we touch them will be similar to a password, like Aaron suggested earlier."
Darius raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, but how do we know what the password is."
"The wizards want to rid the world of all humans, correct?" Darius and Aaron nodded. "And when do they plan on doing that?"
Aaron's eyes brightened. "2013! That's the password!"
Kadira smiled, the blue gum staining her teeth slightly. "Yes. I believe that the first one is zero, and then they are in numerical order." She reached out and touched the third print, representing the two. When nothing happened, she followed by touching the first, second, and fourth prints. The wall trembled where it stood and a circular hole began forming through the middle until it was wide enough for them to crawl through. Kadira went first, followed by Aaron and finishing with Darius.
They entered a large white room with shelves and shelves and shelves lined with potions. The sparkling at first was blinding, but their eyes adjusted. "Perfect," Kadira said again, "This is a great start. See if any potions are missing."
"How will that help?" Darius asked.
"Well, it will tell us if the wizards actually do have Stanley and Kyle. They would have used potions to capture them."
Aaron nodded, and they proceeded to scan their eyes over every shelf. The wizards were terribly organized, so it would have been quite obvious if one potion was not present. But it seemed as though every single one was there, until…
"Found something!" Darius called.
Kadira and Aaron scuffled to get behind him. There was a row of purple sparkling potions, but the very first one was missing. "What kind of potion is it?" Aaron asked.
Kadira's eyes roamed the room until they landed on a small device in the corner. It was like a funnel that led into a tiny test tube, and a tiny display screen rested below it. Kadira took one of the purple bottles and poured a drop into the funnel. It dripped down and landed in the test tube, where it exploded into gushing purple smoke. The display screen flashed "Processing Potion" and made loud beeping noises until it finally came to its conclusion.
"I thought it'd be way more dramatic than that," Aaron said.
Darius laughed. "Looks like someone just came in here to spice up their girlfriend or boyfriend."
Kadira just rolled her eyes and quickly retreated out the other door. Darius and Aaron reluctantly followed, still snickering about the display sign that read "Lust Potion."
I like the way this chapter turned out. I got exactly what I wanted to say out there, and it works. I think. Feel free to tell me I suck.
May I just remind you once again: Type KYLEXCARTMANFAN918 into youtube to see my previews.
Another Review Song (To The Tune Of "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day"
Chapters all come and pass
Twenty-Five have gone so fast
Please review
It's free and easy too
Before I touch my keyboard
I want to know if you are bored
Please review
The cow will moo for you
I know, it's short and just the first two verses of the song. idk, i'm just loony today. I still keep South Park Review Song as my fave
KYLEXCARTMANFAN918 ON YOUTUBE!!!