A/N: Thank you for the reviews (PrimeWhoLockian, 1PocketElf), and thank you to everyone favoriting, following, and in general reading my crazy little fic!
Be everything that you need
-Savage Garden, "Truly, Madly, Deeply"
Friday, February 13, 1998
Xander was the man with the plan. He'd come up with it while we were werewolf sitting two nights ago. After the first night Spike and I weren't allowed to do it alone. Not that anyone said as much, but suddenly we always had at least a third wheel.
Spike was there as muscle, which turned out to be a good thing. When the wolf was at its peak on the night of the actual full moon it tried to make a break for it and Spike only barely managed to stop it from tearing the cage's door off its hinges. Spike, vamped out and going toe to toe with the wolf, muscles straining as he fought to keep the door in place while Xander threaded steel cables around the jamb to prevent Oz's escape, made me feel like a little girl in a candy shop.
It occurred to me later that I could have helped instead of bouncing on my toes, clapping my hands and giggling. In gameface. I don't think Spike minded, though. Probably because he could tell exactly how much I'd enjoyed the show. The googly eyes he was making at me were extra googly after that. If I'd been in my regular body I would have been blushing up a storm.
I think we terrified Giles, however. He was already stressed from dealing with an American werewolf in Sunnydale and us going all fang face was a bit much for him. He was probably trying to be sneaky, but when Giles disappeared into his office I could smell the whiskey he poured for himself. I really couldn't blame him.
Towards morning of that same night I was resting with my head snuggled against Spike's shoulder. Dru and Willow were flat out asleep and Xander was snoring. Even the wolf was curled up on the floor of the cage. Spike was reading something and the regular tick of the pages as he turned them was comforting.
Nearly asleep, the vision caught me unawares. I screamed as the pain lanced through my head.
The mall with The Judge again, paper hearts that they'd never actually use to decorate there were plastered everywhere and hung from the ceiling. The creature's blue head was bumping into them. The scene warped and shifted and I was standing in the school, watching Xander clutch a candle. Everything was lit green and his face was contorted and scary in the half light. Cordelia was standing right behind him. He was chanting on and on as the room filled up with all the girls from the school. They stood and watched him silently, faces and eyes blank. I was in my regular body and only wearing my new black raincoat. To my horror I was suddenly in the Library, only it was just me and Xander, and I was coming onto him. Ewww.
I came back to myself wrapped up in Spike's arms. He was rocking me and cooing nonsense into my hair. When I felt like I could stand I did so, slowly pushing myself upright while Spike's hands stayed on my waist to steady me.
"Buffy?" a bleary-eyed Giles asked. Taking a deep breath, I walked over to Xander and grabbed his hair. I bent down right in his face and let my demon face emerge. My friend squirmed and I could hear his heart racing. He was afraid. Good.
"I know I haven't been all that close to you lately so I really don't get the whole Cordelia thing, and I don't know what she has done or will do to you, but whatever happens do not try to use magic as a means to fix it." I brought my mouth close to his ear and snapped my fangs together for emphasis. Letting go of Xander I shook off the demon and sat down next to Spike again.
Xander looked at my vampire with his eyebrows raised. "Just do what she says," Spike said in a bored tone. He'd gone back to reading his book. "I find that's usually the best choice." Xander chuckled and it broke the tension in the room.
"Was there anything else?" Drusilla asked, knowing eyes on me. My face, with an expression so not my own on it, was disturbing. I had to look away.
I slumped down in my seat and sighed. "Just The Judge at the Mall. We really need a plan of attack." I paused. "Oh," I breathed. "This Saturday, Valentine's Day, it's going to happen then."
"Are you sure?" Willow asked. She was gripping the arms of her chair nearly hard enough to leave dents. I nodded. "What are we going to do? All these books agree that no weapon forged can kill him and it took an entire army to stop him and pull him apart the last time."
Spike cocked his head. "Exactly how long ago was that?"
"Oh!" Xander yelped, his eyes wide in surprise. "Whoa! I think I'm having a thought!" The thought turned out to be a surprisingly good plan.
Which was how I found myself walking into a military base two nights later on Xander's arm. Cordy would have been the more obvious choice but with her and Xander on the outs I'd volunteered to be his cover. Spike had a fit about it, of course. Talking him down had been a blast. I'd finally convinced him to stay at my house to guard my mom along with the fact I was the best choice to go since I could thrall someone if they didn't buy our cover.
Spike had started pacing before Xander, Willow, Oz and I had even left, and I figured he wouldn't stop until we got back. My mom would really bitch if he wore a hole in the carpet.
I was wearing the sluttiest outfit I could put together on short notice: a silver miniskirt and pink sleeveless top I'd found among Dru's things. It had a plunging neckline that hopefully would be a distraction.
As we snuck onto the base I saw that the shirt was working like a charm, on Xander. "Stop it!" I snapped, pushing at his shoulder. Now was so not the time for him to be ogling me. Was it me? I guess he was ogling Drusilla? Not that we had time for that either.
"Sorry," he whispered. We walked a couple of more steps. "Is it weird?" he asked.
"Is what weird?"
"Changing back and forth."
I rolled my eyes. "Yes, of course it's weird. And majorly confusing for me, Dru, and everyone else." I felt like crying, but I had to keep the tears in to avoid ruining my mascara. "I thought as soon as Giles knew about it that he'd be able to fix it." I took a deep breath. "Sometimes I don't even know who Buffy is anymore."
Xander shrugged. "I figure you're who you've always been: a good person."
I was saved from having to say anything by the appearance of a guard. Sticking one hip out to the side and crossing my arms under my breasts I pretended to be bored with the whole situation. I was actually impressed with Xander's ability to talk us not only out of getting in trouble, but he bought us time inside the armory as well.
Once the door closed behind us I give him a quick and very awkward hug. "That was amazing. How'd you know all that stuff?"
"Remember when I was a soldier on Halloween?"
"Oh right, but I wasn't there for the exciting parts." I looked behind me just in time to see him staring at my ass. Boys. I didn't even call him on it. Dru's body, I reminded myself. It's not like I hadn't caught Spike doing the same thing when we were switched. It just wasn't worth getting angry over, especially when it wasn't something he could control. It's not like there was an off button on the attraction because my mind was in a different body.
Y'know, I was really starting to get tired of the whole thing.
"Ah, right. What did you do while I was busy being filled with the knowledge of things like the layout of this base and how to assemble a M-16 in 57 seconds?"
"I ate a raccoon."
He made a face.
"That's the right response."
Xander moved around, checking the labels on boxes. "So what's it like…" he trailed off as he bent down to peer closer at a crate. I figured he'd want to know about the demon and bloodlust, but he surprised me. "What's it like having a vampire for a boyfriend?"
"Intense." I leaned against a stack of boxes. "The blood drinking and only being out at night are easy things to adapt to. The room temperature thing is kind of weird. His hands are so cold I'm always getting goosebumps when he touches me. Spike's also kind of possessive, which sounds creepier than it is. It's the demon." I tapped my head so Xander would remember I had a demon as well when I was in Dru's body. "There's a whole set of instincts and emotions that come along with it and one of them is to hang onto what it yours. My…" I shifted uncomfortably. "I mean, Dru's demon has learned that you're all family. It's protective of all of you."
Xander stopped what he was doing and turned to look at me with a frown on his face. "What about Angelus?"
"What about him?"
"He's been around us a lot more than Spike or Dru, why aren't we family to him? Spike doesn't have a soul and he loves you so much it's kind of sickening, so why is Angelus so different from Angel?"
"I don't know. I think maybe it has something to do with the person he was before he was turned. Also, demons aren't uniform. I think Spike's wants to be loved just as badly as the man does."
Xander made a face. "I think that's enough thinking about Spike and loving for me. Oh! Here we go!" He proudly opened the box to show me the rocket launcher inside.
"Perfect!" The Judge would never know what hit him.
We managed to get the box through a window of the armory, even though Oz and Willow didn't get out of the van to help us. Xander slid open the side door of the vehicle and they flung themselves apart. I grinned. It was good to see someone else get a little lip lock time.
Back at the house my mom was a little upset when we dumped a stolen rocket launcher on the coffee table. "It's to save the world," I told her with a shrug.
"Okay, but I really don't like you stealing." She stared at the crate. "You do remember that I'm going into work tomorrow?"
"Um." I didn't, maybe she'd told Dru and not me.
"Just try to not break any more laws while I'm gone, alright honey?"
I nodded. My gaze narrowed as I caught Spike grinning like crazy behind her. What was he up to?
There was another flurry of activity as Giles and Dru came in wearing grim looks.
"I need to call Jenny," Dru said, taking off upstairs while my Watcher explained about Angelus having killed the head of Ms. Calendar's gypsy clan. I still hadn't entirely wrapped my head around her even being a gypsy, or that she'd known about Angel's curse. Drusilla had instantly forgiven her, of course, and that had made it easier for everyone else to as well. Also in the hierarchy of recently revealed secrets, hers wasn't really so bad.
Dru, her face streaked with tears, eventually rejoined us and we finalized our plans for tomorrow night while Mom flittered about and kept us plied with snacks and drinks. With us facing both The Judge and Angelus, worry started to creep in. I couldn't help wondering if this time tomorrow we'd still all be here to munch on popcorn and sip hot chocolate.
Later, after my mom retired for the night and Giles left to go home, I caught Spike whispering to Dalton and Dru. They immediately stopped as I stood there, hands on hips. "What's up?"
"It's a surprise," Spike hedged, looking almost bashful.
"I don't like surprises."
Dalton sighed. "Your annoying boyfriend is trying to finagle having the day alone with you tomorrow."
I blinked. Valentine's Day? Alone with Spike? Uh, yes please. I felt my whole face light up. "Really?"
Spike ran a hand through his hair and leaned casually against the wall, trying to play cool. "I thought it'd be nice," he purred.
Nice? More like super freaking awesome! He was looking at me from under his lashes and I grinned. I got it. No more virgin scale for me. "Where can you guys stay?" I asked, suddenly remembering Dru and Dalton were standing right there.
"That's the sixty-four thousand dollar question," Spike sighed.
Xander actually ended up volunteering his basement. Dalton and I walked there just a little before dawn. Dru had gone to bed a few hours earlier with a comment about me needing my rest and a lot of winking. I'd have been more embarrassed about all my friends knowing what I was going to be doing on Valentine's Day if I hadn't been so thrilled. I was nearly giddy with anticipation. Oz left with Willow at the same time we had and I wondered if they had any fun planned for that night or tomorrow. There was going to need to be some girl time on Monday. Provided we all survived. I sighed.
Xander asked me a lot of questions about Dru. Mostly I warned him about her mind being extra off and that under no circumstances were her shackles to be removed until it was almost nightfall.
As I tried to fall asleep, chained, surrounded by a whole smorgasbord of unfamiliar smells, and worrying about what was going to happen, I found resting was impossible. Between…hanging out…with my boyfriend and going to stop a potential apocalypse, tomorrow was just too darned exciting.
Saturday, February 14, 1998
The morning didn't find me any calmer. My insides were tripping over themselves. It felt like the butterflies were running a relay race and I simply had no idea what to do with my hands. I'd changed my outfit three…okay, five times and it still didn't feel right. My black coat was hanging behind my door on a peg. I eyed it. In my vision I'd been wearing it and nothing else. Of course it'd been to seduce Xander, which still left me feeling slightly icky. I'd kept that part to myself since Spike might have made him into a little more than a grease spot on the floor if I'd said anything.
The coat called to me. Before I could second guess myself I stripped off everything, even my underwear and wrapped the faux leather around me. I felt a little silly. If I'd misread the whole situation and Spike wanted to have a romantic meal after which we earnestly talked about our feelings and future in hushed tones the outfit was going to be kind of ridiculous. I snorted. Yup, that'd be the day. Actually I was kind of hoping he'd think he'd have to work for it, like it was prom night where the guys thought if they bought the girls a nice wrist corsage and arrived in a limo they might get some. I could play coy and hard to get.
I looked down at myself. Nah. I was way too impatient.
After what felt like way too long Spike knocked at my bedroom door. He looked…nervous. He was wearing the usual black on black, with his red button-down shirt over it. His hair wasn't as tightly slicked back as usual and he was barefoot. "Um," he said as I stood up. I had a pair of black stilettos on and I watched as his eyes caught on them, then followed my legs up until they disappeared beneath the coat. His hand came up to rub the back of his neck. "Uh…" I batted my eyelashes at him.
"Are we really just going to stand here?" I finally asked when he continued to stare.
"Right. Yes...I mean no." He offered me his elbow. I liked it when he did that, it made me feel like more than just a girl. A lady. "May I have to honor of escorting you to a late breakfast?"
"You may." I wrapped a hand around his arm and smiled up at him. He still looked stunned. It made him seem extra human. That'd be okay, for a while, but I wanted my vampire to show up and play at some point.
Spike led me to the top of the stairs. With a boyish grin he picked me up and carried me down, through the living room and kitchen, and into the basement. Gently he set me on my feet and I gasped. The basement had been transformed. There were candles everywhere and some of our white Christmas lights had been hauled out of their storage boxes and strung up. It was magical. There was an area rug with a pile of pillows and blankets on it that looked inviting.
Leaving me standing there gaping, Spike pulled out a bottle of champagne that'd been hidden and two flutes. He popped the cork and poured. The glass was cool under my fingers. "To us," he said, clinking our glasses together.
"Us," I echoed. Spike sipped his, but in my nervousness I chugged mine. I think it had a taste. I wanted to get things going. It's not like I was dumb. Spike hadn't done all this just to make me feel special, though I did, or to tell me he loved me, because I already knew that. Or simply to feed me breakfast…
Oh, hey! Chocolate covered strawberries!
I nabbed one and ducked under Spike's arm as he reached for me. White chocolate. How very subtle of him.
No guy went through all this if he wasn't expecting to get laid. It was extra unsubtle because he'd been talking up about he wanted to make the first time special for me. Like it being him wasn't special enough.
Grinning at my slightly perturbed boyfriend I slipped my lips around the strawberry and basically sucked it off the stem.
Spike's eyes glazed over a little. Score! "I was going to feed you those." He was pouting a little and it was adorable. Well, adorable in a sexy way that made me want to tackle him.
"I know," I said around a mouthful of strawberry. "These are really good by the way." I swallowed as Spike continued to watch me. "I just don't feel much like the whole seduction thing right now."
His shoulders slumped. I was being mean, but hopefully he'd forgive me. His fingers fidgeted with the hem of his red shirt and he sighed. "Guess we can just watch something on the telly if you like." His eyes slid away from me and his whole body radiated defeat.
"Spike!" I almost yelled. I hadn't expected him not to push, even a little. Only, geeze, after the whole Angel thing I guess he really wouldn't. His gaze was back on me and I had nervous butterflies along with the hot and bothered ones again. "I just meant we could do that later. I'm kind of greedy and just want…the other part first." I knew I was blushing as I grabbed the sash to the coat and tugged it open. The material fell from my shoulders and I was standing there naked in front of him.
Spike just stared. He took a breath. Opened his mouth, closed it, and took another breath. I'd apparently rendered my boyfriend speechless. I was still red in the face but I fought the urge to cover myself. I wanted him. Well, not just in general. I could admit it to myself: I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend.
Spike finally found his voice. "Tell me again." He stripped his shirts off.
"I love you."
"I love you, too." His pants were off in record time and I abruptly found myself flat on my back among the pile of pillows with a very naked and amorous Spike with most of his weight on top of me. My Slayer senses went haywire from being pinned by a powerful vampire that had his mouth on my neck. That thrill of danger and the need to suppress the instinct to toss him into the nearest wall made everything that much more exciting. I was panting and trying to touch all of him. His lips were everywhere.
The need was overwhelming and I cringed a little at how breathless and girly my voice sounded. "Please, Spike. Please. Please!" I knew what I was begging for.
And it was good. Really, really good. I had only a second of sadness to think about the fact there was no pain before Spike made sure I wasn't thinking about anything but him. There were stars, fireworks, and I think maybe I touched heaven at one point when he slipped his fangs into my throat.
Afterwards Spike was lying on his back with me curled up against his side. He ran a finger over my cheek. "Sorry," he said, his eyes finding mine.
"Sorry?" I echoed back. Why was he sorry? I still couldn't think straight and I was sure it was going to be a little while before I was going to be able to walk, but shouldn't he be happy about that? I knew I was.
"I meant it to be romantic." His eyelids sank down.
"Romantic?" I was starting to do an imitation of Lorenzo. There'd been pretty lights and champagne. What else had he been planning to do? Read me poetry? I looked around and my dazed eyes fell on a book lying next to the strawberries. There were pages marked.
Oh.
I couldn't help it. I giggled. Spike's eyes snapped back open. "What?" he said, annoyed.
"You're going to kill me on Saturday!" I hid my face against his chest as I laughed.
After a second he started chuckling as well. "Infuriating chit. Never can be patient when it comes to you." His arm wrapped around me and pulled me on top of him. "Did I mess up your doilies?" he asked hopefully.
"Yeah, think you did." I kissed him deeply while reaching over and grabbing the poetry book. I sat up and laid the book on his chest while I wiggled back a bit. "Will you read me one?" I asked, trying to sound innocent.
"Sure." He opened the book but paused to eye me over the top of it. "What are you going to do?"
I moved my hips up and then dropped them, so we were joined again. "I'm going to do what I always do: make things difficult for you." He groaned. "Now read." I tapped the book. His eyes dropped to the words and I felt a tiny bit less self-conscious about what I was doing. There was a learning curve to how to move just right.
"Light, so low upon earth...You send...a…a…Bloody hell, Buffy!"
Spike and I spent the entire day wrapped around each other. I was going to be pleasantly sore for a while and I smiled at the thought. At least I did until I remembered that I'd shortly be switching into Dru's body. With a frown, I shook a napping Spike awake and told him I needed to take a shower. After convincing him I didn't need company and reminding him that my mom would be home soon, I went to the kitchen. I found a bottle of Tylenol and downed a couple before taking a long and very hot shower. I willed my Slayer healing to kick in as I brushed my teeth for a lot longer than normal. The idea of Dru waking up in my body and enjoying the afterglow of how Spike had made me feel left me wanting to hurl.
The fact that she knew just how that felt as well as the idea that he'd made her feel like this probably countless times over the years had me both seething with anger and ready to dissolve into a puddle of sorrow. I poked at the new puncture wounds in my neck before tying a scarf around my throat to cover them. Hopefully I looked stylish and not like I was hiding something.
I was in my room, getting dressed in very boring clothes and listening to Lorenzo practice his 'Bloody Hells', when nightfall arrived. I stumbled as I suddenly found myself walking up the steps of Xander's basement.
"Buffy?" Dalton asked, putting a hand on my back to steady me.
"Yeah, it's me."
"How did today go?"
"It was nice, Dalton. Thank you." I sighed.
Dalton put his arm around me as we left the house and its perpetual booze and cat pee stink behind. "So if it was so nice, why do you look like someone stepped on your puppy? I was expecting a lot of annoying gushing."
Xander was walking in front of us. He turned to look over his shoulder at me.
I couldn't quite contain my smile. "Yeah, okay. I had a really good day, the kind you remember every detail of forever."
"I told him you'd like the poetry." Dalton winked at me.
My hand covered my mouth as I tried to keep the giggles from escaping. "I totally liked the poetry." Xander looked heavenward.
"So why the long face?" Dalton asked again softly while he gave my shoulders a squeeze.
"I was just…thinking, right before I switched."
"Ah!" Xander exclaimed, throwing both hands up. "I highly recommend not doing that."
"That seems to have worked for you so far," I teased.
"Exactly. And I promise you, whatever girly drama is circling around in that brain of yours, I know Spike is not thinking the same thing."
"Amen to that." Dalton chuckled.
I groaned inwardly at the apparently united male front. "And what is he thinking, Xander?" I groused.
"Probably-" Xander turned around so he was walking backwards while he gave a fist pump. "Yay!"
I groaned and covered my face with my hands. Where was Willow when I really needed her?
After meeting up with everyone at my house we armed ourselves for the fight ahead. I thought Giles would leave Spike and me with just our fangs, but my Watcher roughly slapped a mean looking knife into Spike's palm and gave him a warning about not making him regret it.
I got a crossbow and was nearly beside myself with excitement. It felt right to be on the hunt.
When we got to the mall, Oz pulled his van up to a side entrance and Spike easily broke the lock on the door. We entered: grim, silent, and determined. Drusilla led with Giles and Xander following with the crate on their shoulders. The rest of us trailed after, Spike bringing up the rear.
I was having trouble keeping control of my fangs with so many beating hearts surrounding us coupled with the promise of violence. I glanced back at Spike and he grinned as gold swirled in his eyes. Oh yeah, he was having fun, too. I rubbed my hands together in glee.
Part of me realized I was not acting quite human, but at the moment I wasn't human, so what was the harm?
We arrived just in time to see Angelus, his minions, and The Judge taking over the main floor of the mall. A man's ashes were disappearing into nothingness. Dru went for the high ground and I climbed onto a counter top and aimed my bow.
The Judge let his power loose and I gawked. It was like lightening dancing from person to person. I raised my crossbow and fired.
The bolt thudded into his chest and the light disappeared with the people affected still alive.
"Who dares?" The creature's voice boomed loudly over the panicked sounds of the crowd as they rushed to get away. "No weapon forged can stop me."
"Because I'm big, blue and dressed to party because like it's 1099," Spike said in a falsetto. I tried not to laugh as I stepped off the counter and let him catch me. "Do you think he misses Smurf village?" Spike whispered into my ear. I caught sight of Angelus scowling at us and I elbowed Spike to get him to stop.
We ducked down behind the counter and I took Spike's hand, intertwining his fingers with mine. "I just want you to know I had a really good time today. Thank you. You made me feel like the most treasured girl in the word."
"I'm glad." He kissed my brow softly. "I feel like the luckiest bloke to ever have existed."
Dru's voice was chilling as she addressed The Judge. "That was then." She accepted the rocket launcher from Xander and leveled it towards the monster. "This is now." The remaining mall patrons rushed around like idiots as they tried to scramble out of the way. The Judge was so behind the times that he never moved as she fired. The rocket hissed and crossed the space in less than a second. I saw Angelus jump to safety as the explosion hit. Pieces of The Judge rained down around us.
Dru ordered us to gather the parts that were still identifiable as The Judge, but her eyes were on Angelus. "Protect them," I yelled to Spike as I hurried after a now running Dru. The sprinkler system turned on and I growled. The fat water droplets were making it hard to see.
I caught up to Dru in the lobby of the theater just in time to see Angelus knock her to the ground. He was taunting her about having pretended to love her. Dru looked stricken but resolved as she stood back up.
Angelus' tirade trailed off as his nose twitched. Damn it! He could smell Spike on my body. I'd showered and changed, but after the day we'd spent Spike was too deeply physically intertwined with me for a little bathing to get his scent completely gone.
"Well, well, did you get a taste for cold men and need a fix?" Angelus' smile didn't reach his eyes.
Dru bristled with indignation. "That's none of your business!"
"What's the cute little scarf for? Did the boy take a poke and then convince you to let him take a taste? He's got stones, I have to give him that." Angelus' face was a mask of hate. "Does Drusilla know?"
"Why don't you ask me yourself?" I drawled. Angelus twisted his head towards me and his face instantly softened. "Dru!" He held his hand out. "Won't you come and play with daddy? I've missed you my Childe." I nearly gagged as he tried to force me to comply through the Sire bond. I was able to resist, but I knew deep down that if Spike and I hadn't strengthened our blood connection a couple of nights ago in the Library that I might not have had such an easy time of it.
I ignored Angelus' hand and giggled instead. "Of course I know what the Slayer and Spike are up. I was there after all."
Dru laughed as well, shaking her head over my half-truths.
Angelus' eyes darted back and forth between us. "Why Buffy, if I had known you were that kinky I might have stuck around a while longer."
I snorted and walked slowly towards him. "You couldn't handle us. The Slayer's lucky you left, it turns out she needed a real monster in the sack."
Angelus snarled and tried to punch me. I ducked and Dru landed a hard jab to his face. For several minutes we fought. Well, Dru did and I tried to assist her. The body I was in was not nearly fast, flexible, or strong enough to be a huge help, but I could be a distraction.
Dru and I worked well together. Eventually we got Angelus backed into a corner. I spat blood at him. He'd landed a lucky punch to my mouth earlier and my lip was split. "You're nothing, Angelus," I sneered at him.
"Says the vampire who'd rather shack up with the Slayer than be a true demon," he spat back.
"Oh, you wound me!" I dramatically clutched at my breast.
Drusilla blindsided him with a kick that had her full strength behind it. Her hand tightened around a stake but as I watched she faltered. The stake wavered in her grasp.
"You can't do it." Angel stood up with a sickening grin on his face. "And don't expect your little boy toy to protect you. I've known Spike far longer than you. He can be an impatient ass, but he knows how to play the game. He's using you to take me out then he'll drain you dry and dance on your grave. He's been with Dru for more than a century. A little blonde whore that's a lousy lay isn't going to change that."
My jaw dropped. Angelus was a lying liar…who lied. The liar. I kicked him as hard as I could right in the nuts. He grunted and doubled over in pain.
"Give me time!" Drusilla called over her shoulder as I grabbed her arm and led her away.
"You didn't dust the wanker," Spike stated as we rejoined the group. Of course he would have been able to tell. Family line. I sighed and shook my head.
It was a somber group that returned to my house. The Judge was gone but Angelus was still out there.
Dru had cried on and off and I was unable to comfort her. I was feeling off myself. I didn't believe Angelus, did I? That Spike was just playing the long-con?
None of us were able to sleep. We all ended up milling between the kitchen and the living room where infomercials with the sound off were playing. I watched the one for that cleaner stuff twice. Maybe it could get the demon blood out of my favorite pair of shorts?
Giles finally pulled Dru aside to talk to her. With my vampire hearing I couldn't help eavesdropping. He told her that we didn't blame her for not being able to easily kill a man that had been her creator, in more way than one, who was essentially her father and lover. Dru had sobbed piteously on his shoulder.
I'd found her staring into the mirror in the bathroom later. "You doing okay?" I asked.
"No." She sighed and rested her hand over her refection. "Every evil thing he does from the moment I didn't strike is now my fault."
"Dru, no!" I gasped. "You're not…"
"I am. Next time he doesn't walk away."
I nodded and turned to leave.
"You didn't believe him?" she whispered behind me. "Did you?"
"I don't think so," I said while staring at the floor. I walked away quickly before she could say anything else.
Dawn had just crested and I was back in my own body. I was wearing my favorite pajamas and sitting on the kitchen island, watching Spike smoke a cigarette as he stood in the shadows on the back porch.
I loved him so much it was nearly a tangible thing. My heart ached with it. I knew I was being a silly teenage girl and that Spike was my first love. I wanted him to be my only. I couldn't believe that what I was feeling was some kind of puppy love that'd fade in a month. It was a conflagration that would still burn long after I found my final resting place.
Spike stubbed out the butt of his cigarette in a sand-filled flower pot my mom had put there after she caught him doing it in one of her actual planters. He came and stood between my knees and cupped my face tenderly in his hands. I wound my arms around his waist.
He kissed my lips and I could taste blood, smoke, and him. With a sigh I settled my head against his chest, my ear over his unbeating heart.
There was no way Angelus had been telling the truth. This was real.
Our peace was shattered as the house filled with my mother's terrified scream.