A/N: Heya, loyal readers. Let me get my excuses out of the way before we begin. I had hoped to get this chapter out when I had finally finished my classes, but I ended up getting in a car accident the day after finals. My car was totaled, but thankfully I only ended up with a concussion. Of course, with a concussion, I can only give my eyes and brain so much stimulation and my time writing has been grossly limited. Also, my dog ran and has been missing since the end of June. The search for her has been hard. So things haven't necessarily been in my favor, but I do apologize for the wait and appreciate your patience.

It's taking me much longer than I anticipated to get this over to AO3, because I'm also trying to edit these chapters before I repost them. I'm not infallible to errors. I do the editing by myself so a lot falls through the cracks, despite my desperate attempts to catch them. I cringe when I read over my work and I can't just ignore the mistakes. However, I'm optimistic that I'll be getting back to it on there soon. I just figured you'd all rather I update first before I get back to editing and transferring.

Long story short, have a good read and hopefully the next chapter will be up soon.

Reviewers:

time-and-relative-dimensions91 – Thank you so much! The action scenes can be hard to put into clear words sometimes, so it's great to know that I'm getting better at writing them.

Daaku Urufu – Thank you for the review and thank you again for pointing out those errors.

Deflow – It would most certainly be cool, but I think Hope needs some more training to fully understand the strengths and limits on his new brand first.

LawMan (2) – Glad to still have you here.

Nightsparrow15 – Yes, I remember you, though it has been a while. Good to know you're still reading this even if you aren't reviewing. You don't need to feel obligated to review every chapter, it's just nice to hear your opinions when you have the time to share them.

Guest – Nope, not even close.

H-thar – My goodness. I kind of just gawked at your review for a few minutes before I was able to actually read it. I felt a little overwhelmed just getting a review from the great H-thar period. I have read most of your stories and it's an honor to get such a review from you. Thank you a million times over for your words of appreciation and criticism. I will give it all some thought. I'm genuinely surprised by how well received my OCs are, considering a lot of OCs are either despised or disregarded in fanfics. I cringed at using my own characters for that very reason, but I needed more people so I just chose to treat them like any other newly introduced final fantasy character. And, yes, seriously depressed Hope is excruciatingly hard to write – my soul dies a little every time I have to – but it's also fun to stretch out his personality more from what we were given in the game. I love giving his character more depth and really digging into his nature and mentality. Same goes for Lightning, as well.

gummy b3ars – Thank you. It's one of the reasons I love this pairing so much too.

Revised: March 2015

Sazh felt an almost overbearing peace nestled within his core as he began to finally awaken. He was acutely aware of the goings on around him. His arms, sore and tired, were draped across the slender shoulders of Lightning and the broader set of Hope's as they pulled his body forward. His legs dragged behind them, his heavy boots creating an echoing sound as they skidded along on the dirt and rock. He could smell the dank, dampness of the cave, its pungent odor of death still hovering below his nose, though there was a wavering scent of life and crisp air that threatened to overtake it.

Sazh didn't open his eyes, nor did he want to. It was selfish of him, he knew. He should want to let his comrades know that he was all right and take his weight off of their exhausted bodies. But all he could think about was the lingering tendrils of sleep that resided in the back of his mind, pulling and yanking him back into blissful unconsciousness. They promised the happiness that most nights brought - of dreams filled with his son's laughter and the bright smiles of his wife.

He could still see them from their last visit into his mind as he'd slept. It was as if nothing had changed from the way his life had once been. And for a short time, he could imagine that it was truth. Wilda sitting beside him in her yellow summer dress that accentuated her curves beautifully. The way her silky brown locks fell gently down around her shoulders. Her chuckles as their growing baby boy that was nestled in her lap tugged at her hair in his face. They were sitting in their home, happy and content. Sazh knew that this was what peace was like. That was the way he wanted to spend the rest of his days. With his small, yet completely perfect family.

Fate had chosen something different for them, of course. His wife had passed. His son had become cursed with a mark that bound him to his current crystal state. And Sazh was now a part of a tiny rebel group trying to save the world.

He never wanted to be a hero. Not even when he was a sprout with the world ahead of him. He had always wanted a simple life. Snow could keep his dreams of being superman to himself. Sazh just wanted the world back in place and his son back in his arms. If Hope, Lightning and the gang could be beside them, then he would have the closest thing to perfection since his days in his pale blue house on Sconson Drive.

With one last thought to his family, Sazh allowed his eyes to open as the group came to a stop. A breath of fresh air filled his lungs and he was nearly deliriously happy to see that they were now rid of the caves behind them.

Clouds of salmon and vermillion swam in the sky, the sun giving off its dying rays in the distance. The team had emerged near the very bottom of the mountain, right into what appeared to be a large, desolate kingdom. A castle hung overhead, massive, yet dwarfed by the towering mountains behind it. A village lay before it, buildings burned and broken, left hollow and lifeless.

Sazh coughed as the new air came to be too much for the elder man, startling those supporting him.

"Sazh!" Hope smiled at the man as they led him down to the ground, his eyes tinged with a great amount of concern. "How are you feeling?"

He cleared his throat and swallowed, trying to get the dryness of his vocal chords to lessen. "Like a new man," he replied with a sloppy grin. "I believe I have you to thank for that."

Hope shook his head, green irises only slightly watery. He gripped the man's shoulder tightly, his gaze moving to Lightning who was less visibly happy, but still very relieved. "We all had a hand in that." A punch to his right shoulder was earned for his comment.

"Take the appreciation you're due, Estheim," snapped Lightning in her clipped tone, though the corners of her lips hinted toward a smile. "We can rest here for a while if you need, Sazh."

"Nah, I think I've slept long enough. Besides it's time we get back on track, yeah?"

"Actually," interceded Zalera, "this will be a good place to stop. We're near Pulse's Castle, but not near enough to continue forward. We should rest here." Zalera's eyes swept before the village in front of them. It was odd, the connection she felt toward the place and the lost souls she could nearly sense lingering there.

Lightning grunted in reply, not happy with yet another stop, but she had to trust that the Pulsian knew what she was doing. She had gotten them out of the caves, after all. Lightning's brow furrowed as she considered just how Zalera had managed to find their way out of the seemingly never ending maze of tunnels and burrow holes. Their path out had hardly been easy, nor particularly logical at times. Though when asked, the woman had replied with an 'I just know' and left it at that. "Where are we?"

Hope took a stab at the answer. From his studies of the Cavalry's maps and the sparse history scrolls he could find about Pulse, it only took him a quick minute to formulate his guess. "One of the four kingdoms, right, Zalera? Judging by its architecture and location, either Arturia or Mythnea."

Taking in a breath of the new air, Zalera let it out slowly through her nose, allowing her restlessness to settle. "There were four grand kingdoms before the war. This was the second... that fell to the greed and malice of the first. The kingdom of Arturia."

The words stayed suspended, their weight stiffening Zalera's shoulders visibly enough for Lightning to notice. The roseate didn't know anything about Arturia or any kingdoms, she didn't care much for the geography of Pulse, nor had she been awake long enough for it to truly matter in her work yet, but she could recognize that there was some significance there. Zalera's expression held an intensity that Lightning had only seen in the woman's past recollections of her life before, and Hope's face held an expression of complete wonderment. "Is it safe?"

Hope turned to Lightning before his gaze followed hers to Zalera. He didn't think she'd make the suggestion if it wasn't safe. It's a valid question, though.

"We shouldn't stay in any of the buildings or homes, but camping in the middle of the square should be fine."

Hope stared at his hand and watched it tremble in the campfire's light. If he thought that leaving the caves would put his mind at ease, he was wrong. He could still feel the scampering steps, the vibrations of their squeaks and screeches. And when he found his body at its most restful, he could feel a pulse resting there in the core of his palm. Like a freshly procured heart beating in his hand.

A heart he would come to squash.

Sazh watched the torment flicker in Hope's eyes from across the campfire. Something had happened back in the caves that Sazh wasn't privy to. Something had disturbed the boy enough to bring him close to the edges of his sanity again. He felt very responsible for it. "So, Zalera," Sazh began. He smiled as Hope jolted at the start of a conversation and dropped his hand back to his lap, full focus on the reality around him. "You said this used to be a 'grand kingdom'? What happened to it?" A little history lesson never hurt anyone.

Zalera visibly flinched at the inquiry, but didn't question it. "Some years after the Mythnea kingdom came under the reign of their first princess and the second prince of Arturia, it's said that they grew tired of being one of many. They claimed to be the one true kingdom and slayed anyone who opposed. They took over all of the kingdoms, this one first. And even that wasn't enough. They began to take towns and villages, killing any within." Zalera's disgust was surely evident on her face, for she made no attempt to hide her contempt. Greed and power had been what killed the prosperous kingdoms as they tended to consume and destroy everything in their path.

"Arturia's prince married another kingdom's princess and then took out his own home kingdom? Damn, no loyalty amongst royals."

Zalera shrugged a shoulder. "The marriages between kingdoms were supposed to keep peace. They mixed the blood to keep a balance of power between all of them. But even the best laid plans have their flaws."

Hope, highly intrigued by the tales of Pulse he'd never heard before, was eager to learn more. "What happened to them? The rulers of Mythnea and their people? Did they conquer all of Pulse? Or did they finally come across an opponent they couldn't match? Or-" A hand halted any of his further inquiries as Zalera chuckled.

"I don't know. Most of the written records of that time period were lost in the war. Any accurate information I have was from the elder of our tribe or from Yeul's Guardian when he would speak about his past, which was rare. Anything else are rumors."

"That's a pretty large chunk of Pulsian past to become nearly forgotten," spoke a disappointed Hope. "So it's mostly a lot of speculation and tales of legend, rather than actual facts."

Sazh gave a snort, shaking his head at Hope's words. "Isn't that most of history? Who's to say that all we know of Cocoon's past, or hell, even the origin of the whole planet, isn't just a bunch of 'speculation and tales of legend', as you put it?"

Hope only nodded, recognizing the pilot's point, and looked to Zalera to continue. Even the gods that had tied him so ruthlessly to his fate were only made of faith, validated by man's words and interpretations. Their proof of existence was still heavily marred by conjecture and theory.

"Some said that they eventually became gods, ruling over the lands they had once claimed. Others say that the gods smote them for their sins, but their unholy spirits were rejected by Etro. They haunt the lands, having become creatures of folklore and nightmares. As kids, we all would scare each other with the story. That they would come at night and steal all you had, including your very soul. They were our scary stories, our monsters under the bed…" A quiet, dark laugh fell from Zalera's lips as she recalled the moments of her childhood. "The most believed and popular theory is that their greed finished them off. They killed each other, each wishing to claim the power for themselves."

Classic tale. Lightning sat to the side, her blade on her lap as she checked over its functions. Her mind, as most of theirs, was still trapped within the past events in the cave. That feeling that had washed over her in her moment of vulnerability had not been acceptable. It had rendered her immobile. It had almost cost her her life, as well as that of Hope's. At that, her cerulean orbs caught sight of the teen. He was engrossed in Zalera's story, almost overtly so. She wondered if he was trying to distract himself as she was with her weapon.

They all spoke for another few hours until a quiet seeped in and stole away the conversation, allowing most of the group to become aware of their shared exhaustion. Hope sat and stared out into the darkness that had fallen around them, listening to the sharp crackles of the fire and allowing the warmth to seep into the cold numbness within him.

"I wonder how Academia's doing," Zalera spoke tentatively from her spot beside Sazh, opposite Lightning and Hope.

Sazh cocked his brow at the utterance and gave a pensive hum. "They got the shields up, right? So they were at least protected from any further attacks. The focus then would just be recovery and rebuilding… They'll be alright. I'm sure that by the time we get back, the Academy, Corps, and Cavalry will have stitched everything back together."

The conversation, as innocent as it was, stabbed deeply into old wounds. Hope grimaced and busied himself with grabbing another small log and applying it to the fire. Although, inner thoughts tumbled out that he couldn't help. "Realistically, I wonder if I'll be seeing Academia again at all. Or if I'm just doomed to remain a l'Cie weapon until I die."

"Dammit, don't say things like that," snapped Lightning, turning sharply to look at him with icy eyes.

"I hate myself for what I've done. For everything I've done."

"Those creatures were going to kill us."

"So it's okay for me to kill them all?!" Hope gained a heated glare to match her icy stare. He'd killed all of them. She didn't, couldn't understand how that felt. "I just basically killed off an entire species. I just did what the fal'Cie is trying to do to us."

Lightning's mouth opened as if to retort, but she held herself back. She could see he was hurting and although it pained her to hear and see him bear his sorrows, she much preferred this to him hiding it all behind a hard mask of indifference. In no way did she wish him to be like her.

"I don't know what to do, Light. I want to fight. I want to protect people. I can't be a leader and stand for my people and not fight for them... But I can't..."

"Kill."

Hope winced and led his gaze back to the floor. He could feel everyone's stares on him and was very conscious of Zalera's and Sazh's silence, though he was kind of grateful for that. "I don't think I'll ever be okay with taking a life." When he'd been that young scared boy at Lightning's heels, he'd had no choice but to fight. It was their lives on the line. But the guilt afterwards had eaten him up all the same. He'd never grown to accept killing. It was one of the reasons he'd planned to become a researcher within the Academy after it had first been established. He could work to create ways of protecting people without having to risk lives. He wouldn't have to force others to kill for him. Even soldiers had to have hard times killing too, right? Why should they have to commit their souls to the horrors of taking lives?

"What do you do? How do you..."

A few fleeting emotions, sharp and nauseating, flashed to the surface before she swallowed them back down. Lightning knew the feeling Hope was referring to. After her first real battle with an enemy, she had battled with herself for hours, the term murder being the only thing she could think about. Lightning had managed to come to terms with it eventually, but Hope didn't seem to be able to. "When I'm faced with an enemy... I don't just see him. I see the situation. I see his past and his future. What he's done. The chances he'll do it again. If he'll hurt me or others... Mostly I think… Is this person worth saving?"

Hope's brow furrowed. He didn't think there was anyone that was unworthy of being saved.

"Your judgement holds more weight than any gun or blade. Some people can handle killing better than others. And some people feel the weight more." She kept it all as uncomplicated as possible. It was all true, but she feared that it may have been too blunt for Hope's magnanimous nature.

"How many people have you killed?"

"Too many to count," Lightning replied as such a thing as a kill count had never interested her.

"One-hundred and twenty-three."

"What?"

"One-hundred and twenty-three. That's how many people that I know I have killed. There are probably dozens more. Who knows how many that were my fault. Those that I didn't kill with my own hands, but that died because of me and my actions."

"Don't. It'll drive you insane." She couldn't help the anger that had seeped into her tone. What was he thinking keeping track of such a thing? Don't. Stop. It'll only tear you up more.

"Isn't that the price of taking a life!" Hope asked with a shout. There had to be some sort of cost for such a deed. "Having to carry their dead souls on you for the rest of your own life?" Hope was shocked out of his fury momentarily as his collar was seized by the sergeant at his side. He watched as she raised her fist, but resisted in letting herself hit him.

She wanted to smack him, to punch him. How dare he let such darkness corrupt his pure soul. How dare he struggle so deeply with something like this. He'd never harmed anyone because he wanted to, but out of necessity, to protect himself and others. How dare he question any of his actions that had kept himself and others alive. The scum and monsters he'd killed didn't have the right to steal his happiness from him. How dare he think such things. And how dare she let him fall into such a rut. She couldn't watch him do this anymore.

Lightning jerked him back and out of her hold, taking a few steps away to cool down. What am I supposed to say? With Hope's unyielding compassion for fucking everything, it's no surprise that he feels this way.

Hope stared down at his hands, idly playing with the frayed edges around a hole in his jacket. "I've lost too many people. I'm not a hero or a leader. I can't even call myself a soldier."

"A soldier protects all he or she can. There are going to be acc-"

"Don't you dare say acceptable losses," Hope bit out. He hated those words. Of course, it was how a soldier was trained to see battle. The lives lost were seen as a necessary cost for safety and peace. "I know you're a soldier, but you're also a person, Light. You're human. You can't be okay with all of this death and destruction. A soldier may be okay with acceptable losses, but a person isn't. Where does the soldier end and you begin?"

Lightning turned slowly to face him with a long, level look. When had this become about her? Since when had this become a debate about her dwindling humanity?

"You are more than a soldier and you know it. What about Serah? A soldier, an honorable and obedient soldier, wouldn't have left her post, forgotten her duty, to save her sister."

Her voice came back quiet, but harsh. "But I didn't with you. The perfect soldier let you be tortured for the good of a team of men."

Hope let that statement set in. This bitter resentment Lightning held towards herself over this issue was growing into a stagnant problem for them.

"Reveling in your mistakes, in the actions that you could've taken instead of what you have taken, won't do you any good, Hope. It only makes you question yourself in the future. Doubt creates hesitation. And hesitation only leads to an early grave."

He could only disagree. "I don't think so. It reminds me of what I fight for. The people I've killed... the people I couldn't save... I won't let their deaths mean nothing." He could only continue forward. Yes, he had to let the deaths within his past rest within him, but he could channel all of his sorrow and anger and regret into something more. Something better. "I'm going to get the crystals. I'm going to free those in stasis. I'm going to defeat anyone who tries to get in my way. I'm going to live for those who can't anymore."

It all had to mean something. If he could at least make their deaths – all of their deaths – mean something, then he could not only avenge them, but find some sort of inner peace with himself. They weren't mistakes or acceptable losses to just acknowledge and disregard. You don't throw away a bad grade and act like it never happened. You learn from it. And you do better next time. Or, better yet, you fix it and make it right.

"I want to be able to face myself in the mirror every day. I want to create a world where everyone can live and not cower in the face of some ominous fate or horrid destiny. Every time I fight, every time I take a life, I see one more person being freed from their crystal delusions. One more person living their life in Academia and not hiding out in a bunker while the city is destroyed."

Hope took a breath, finding himself – his own words – assuaging his own dilemmas. He then delved deep into Lightning's stern gaze, praying that he would find something there. Something that wasn't a product of training and pain and anger and fear. "I fight for my future and the future of others. I see the future when I fight. What do you see?"

Visions of a grand life… It was almost laughable. Her future didn't have a white picket fence, a nice life nestled in peace. No matter how deluded she allowed herself to become in Hope's arms, she had become a soldier for a reason. …are a distraction… When she completed that thought there was a sudden hollowness that built in her gut. It was like she was missing something by not believing how Hope did. Like the future meant nothing. She could only live in the present. The past and the future held nothing for her. She couldn't fight and worry about how each step she took would affect that future she desired. Having that cloud over her head would only lead to more instances of freezing up in battle. "I see the battle, and then I see the next one."

Her answer stung, though he sort of expected it to. "Lightning-"

"I mean, what are we trying to do? Who are we trying to save? A bunch of people who hate us? People who would rather see us dead or kill us themselves?" Lightning stood with her arms out, exasperation etched into her features. How many times was she going to have to watch his selflessness get him hurt? Until she was standing in front of his grave? She was sick of cemeteries.

"Those soldiers attacking you really affected you, huh?"

She let her arms drop to her sides. It wasn't just about them. It was about all of the evil bastards in the world that Hope was willing to take a bullet for. "Maybe they should all just rot."

"No." Hope refused to give up. He couldn't see how Lightning could suggest it either. "Don't you get it? Don't you understand?"

"Understand what?"

"They're from Cocoon."

"So are we," she retorted, unmoved by the explanation.

"Exactly. And what were we taught? What did we grow up hearing? We've always known Pulse to be hell - that Pulsians and l'Cie were the enemy. I can't blame people for what they've learned as truth. They believe what they've always been told. And we aren't going to prove them right. We'll show them that they're wrong. As a Pulsian, as a l'Cie, as previous Cocoon people. We'll show them that we are all the same and have one goal. We will protect the people of Cocoon and the people of Pulse alike. I don't care what it takes. We all have to share this planet, why can't we coexist together?"

"Alright, okay," interrupted Sazh. "We're getting a little ahead of ourselves now. World peace is great and all, but I think we gotta handle Castea first."

"Right, but we aren't turning our backs on the people I swore to protect."

"I can't stand the thought of those ignorant ass holes hurting you," Lightning murmured.

Hope watched as Lightning tensed and a strong amount of hurt swam in her eyes. "Light..."

With a growl, Lightning snapped back. "No, you know what they said?! 'Who gives a shit about a little punk like Estheim? We should have killed him the first time around when he was a scrawny pipsqueak. Maybe then there would still be a Cocoon.' I'm sorry, Hope, but I will not just blindly protect people."

"You're a soldier. Isn't that what you're supposed to do?"

"My orders are to protect you. Not the scum that are still clinging to fal'Cie chains."

The young director shook his head as he felt yet another wall come up. "I will not give up my faith, especially not in the face of conflict."

"Good, it's great to see you get your resolve back." Zalera stood and put her hand on his shoulder, giving him the support and morale he obviously needed. She had watched and let the two argue and bicker. They'd gotten their frustrations out. For better or for worse? Time would tell. "And you're right. We won't let their deaths be for nothing."

Hope's eyes remained locked with Lightning's. When she failed to back down or say anything at all, he found that he was going to let her stubbornness win out this time. "Lightning-"

"Do what you want, but when you get stabbed in the back by your people, at least you'll have your blind faith. Because I'm not going to be there to watch."

Hope bit his tongue and swallowed all of his apologies and regret-filled words. How could he apologize after such a statement? No, this wasn't about pride. It was about his personal ideals and boundaries. It was about her lack of respect for them and him in general. It was about her callous disregard for his truest thoughts actually hurting him. He had thought that at some level, she would agree with him.

They stared at each other for a few intense minutes. There was a silent battle here, one with words neither could say. Not yet.

The time went by. The agonizing silence that slipped in and swiped away any resolve either might have had. And then, Hope walked away, the tension in his shoulders a clear indication of his lingering frustration.

Zalera then followed, a scowl deeply set into her expression. She kept her gaze from meeting Lightning as she briskly sped to Hope's side until they were both lost amongst the buildings of the kingdom.

When neither could be seen, Lightning sat back down with an amused, but mostly irritated huff. "Of course she takes his side."

"No one's takin' sides. She just agrees with his point a little more than yours, is all." Sazh gave her unimpressed look a smirk as he idly prodded the fire with a stick.

"Trying to placate me, old man?" She busied herself with weapon maintenance again, needing something easy to do. Something she could do on auto, in her sleep, while she ignored her brain's inner rants.

Sazh let out a slow chuckle, his gaze stuck on the spot Zalera and Hope had disappeared into. "I got a brief recap of recent events from Zalera. I get your point. He did what he had to do. Now he's just dealin' with it. Although, I think you should give some thought to the things he said."

"I never wanted this for him…" Her eyes lifted to meet Sazh who only looked at her skeptically. "Okay, maybe when we first met. I wanted him to stop being such a whiny wuss."

A few mirth filled laughs erupted from the man as he nodded. He remembered exactly how Hope had been - young, innocent, and scared, as expected of a fourteen year old. And Lightning had been rude, impatient, and abrasive. Not the best mix.

"But not after I began to know him. Not after I gained a little insight. There should be no reason for him to get his hands dirty. That's for soldiers like me."

"And even there you disagree… Hope… He still has to figure out what kind of man he wants to be. He'll get there. And you'll be right beside him through it all. Right? You're not goin' to run from a little trouble, are you?"

"He can't seriously be this dense. This naïve." There was an old jealousy there. One she'd never admit to and one that could only be seen in the set of her shoulders and the bitter frown just touching the corners of her mouth. He was still so innocent, seeing the world in such a hopelessly optimistic way. Her mentality was you kill what you have to, to protect the people you care for, as well as for what's right. His mentality was that no one had to die. It was dangerously naïve to harbor such thoughts as 'everyone can be saved'. Simple and stupid, it was, especially for someone of his intelligence, but she envied him for retaining such a childish notion even after all he had seen - after everything he had been through. It was both a relief and a horror, but it was very Hope.

Pinching the bridge of her nose, she collected her thoughts that were becoming too jumbled for her liking. Their current state was a mess because of the emotions mixing in without warrant and destroying her sanity. She never liked to talk about these things, with friends that were practically family or not. "I know he was once received as this brilliant and adored director, but if those ungrateful people can just turn their backs on him the minute he's branded, then they don't deserve a shred of his compassion."

"It wasn't always like that, y'know? He was hated in the beginning." The soldier's eyes flickered up to meet his, confusion written in her aqua orbs. The woman had missed a lot of Hope's life, so it made sense that she didn't fully understand his turmoil. Hope wasn't as blind to the cruelty in the world as she thought. "I know I wasn't around for too much of his beginning after the fall, but I know what his father told me, as well as Rygdea and Hope himself. He was ridiculed by his classmates and hunted by furious and well-trained people. People we all gave our lives for before the fall."

Hope had worked hard to earn Academia's trust and admiration before he'd been granted his position as Director. All for nothing, it seemed, as they had all regained their pitchforks the second his brand had reappeared and a new war began. "He knows what they're capable of, but he chooses to protect them anyway. That's what the good guys do. They fight to save who they can, even if it's they're mortal enemy."

Lightning clicked her tongue as disgust tinged her features. "And that's how the good guys get killed."

"Well, then it's a good thing that this good guy has an extraordinary woman to watch his back." Sazh let the conversation fall off there as he laid back on the log he had been perched on and looked up at the stars. Real stars. Not manufactured ones controlled by a fal'Cie. There were definitely some small bonuses to life on Pulse. Life on a real, genuinely natural world, seemingly ungoverned by any overbearing beings, being one of them. The stars above made their world seem so small, their problems insignificant.

She let her gunblade fall to the side, its ungraceful meeting with the ground loud in her ears. I'm not the extraordinary one here... Staring at her weapon, she found that she didn't quite miss its presence from its place glued to her side as much as she usually did. It could lay there on the ground covered in dirt and rust forever for all she cared. A hollow, raw feeling developed inside of her and she didn't automatically want to barricade it away or tear it out. She just sat there, joining Sazh in staring at the stars.

Hope ignored Zalera as she came to his side, too focused on stewing in his anger. She stayed quiet, lingering near him, yet giving him just enough space so that he didn't feel crowded. Staring at him, she could see how upset he was. His emotions were plain on his face. Deeply wounded was probably the best way to describe what she could see on him.

The glowing moon cast its light down on the town and Zalera could appreciate the kingdom's beauty, even in its broken and desolate glory. There had once been life here. People had once called this place their home. Before hatred and greed had shredded it apart, this had all once been a town that had thrived and prospered. Much like her own home…

Hope swallowed down his emotions. He hated fighting with Lightning, but it had been unavoidable. It had all been the truth. He had people to fight for. He wasn't going to give up. Not on anyone. Not for anything. There was good in these people, and he was going to protect that. If Lightning had a problem with it… then maybe we have a lot more to work through then I thought.

Zalera's silence at his side drew him to looking at her. She wasn't paying him much mind, just silently offering him some comfort through her proximity. Although, as he looked at her, he could see that there was something stirring inside of her. She had been acting oddly for a while now. Originally, he thought it had just been the caves, but as he looked at her fearful expression, eyes wary, he could tell that something was very off. "Is there something you're not telling me? Is it not safe here?" Returning from her thoughts, she looked visibly startled and now had Hope's full attention. "Because you've been…"

Zalera furrowed her brow, a little annoyed at being caught off guard. She thought that he would have been preoccupied with his and Lightning's little tiff, not with analyzing her body language.

"What? Thought I wouldn't notice," he continued with a subdued smile.

"I thought you were busy focusing on much more pressing matters than my sense of unease," she replied with a small smile of her own.

"Seriously, though, what's up?"

Zalera's gaze slid to the side, her hand coming up to shakily graze the rough stone of one of the buildings that still stood, as though needing something to ground her. "Did I ever tell you how I came to join Yeul's tribe?" At Hope's silence and curious gaze, she continued. "As my name suggests, I wasn't born into it. I was born Zalera of the Lin clan of Hondura. My town was small and old, but it was my home-" She broke off in a choke. Old memories were something she often dwelled upon, but it was different speaking of them. "And in one night, it was gone. Burned to ashes, while my family... everyone was slaughtered. I just watched, too weak to stop it."

Hope's eyes widened as he took it in. "So this kingdom..."

"It affects me. I was born in a tiny, lonesome village near Skatsboro, nothing near the size and greatness of this kingdom. Yet, on its haunted grounds, I feel as if I could be standing in my fallen home. I can see what happened to these people. I can feel what they all felt." The cries and shrieks sprang up in her memory, accompanied by the smell of smoke that burned her nostrils and churned her stomach. She could still feel the fear that had gripped her as her bare feet slapped against the ground. She ran and ran, but she could never get far enough away.

Hope reached out a hand, wanting to help, wishing to ease the pain for his friend, but he stopped short and let his hand fall back to his side. Zalera was trembling now, but her face was turned away from him, hidden away by her long, beaded hair. He gave her a few quiet moments until her form stilled and she regained her composure.

"Mother always said I was the treasure of our town, born not only with green eyes, but green hair as well. Green was the patriotic color of our town. The dragon of Hondura - our ancient guardian – had been spoken of as having scales of a vibrant green…" Sniffing, Zalera glanced back at Hope with a somber smile. "When it was all gone, I decided to represent Hondura and its people with all I could. I wear it with pride."

"I'm-"

She didn't want to hear any apologies or sympathies, well intended as they might have been. "I know what it's like to survive from this," she spoke softly, gesturing to the village surrounding them. "And now you know, too. Except… Academia is resilient. Your people have survived and Academia will once again flourish."

The silveret hummed in agreement. "Provided we succeed." Hope watched the town silently beside Zalera, now feeling a sort of kinship with its people. He could understand Zalera's sentiment. He had been through what these people had experienced, but there was a striking difference between Academia and Arturia. There hadn't been any survivors to rebuild Arturia back to its former glory. Hope wasn't going to allow Academia to fall into its same fate. "Do you know who took Hondura?"

"A small tribe under the orders of a much larger one," she replied, her tone cold, yet coated in resignation.

"What happened to them?"

Zalera stepped away from the wall, her eyes meeting Hope's fleetingly before she chose to look up at the sky. "Yeul's Guardian killed them all."

Lightning stood, rigidly watching the world around her. She hadn't spoken to Hope since their fight. She wanted to, but there wasn't anything to say. Hope wanted to save the world. She didn't think the world deserved it. The end.

It wasn't entirely true. She didn't want the world to end or everyone to die, per say. She just wished quite a few of her species could meet their demise a little sooner than expected. But she would rather watch all of those men that had betrayed Hope become kings then let Castea and that Belphagor fal'Cie have their way. She wanted them to burn. And they would, she'd see to that.

Lightning's hand went to her chest, her nail's digging into the fabric of her sweater vest until the pressure nearly hurt. Her own brand had not been absent from her thoughts during all of this. She would love to kill the witch with the same powers Castea so obviously prided herself on. That would be a kill Lightning could take pleasure in. Hope's stern look of disapproval flashed across her mind and Lightning groaned.

Turning to look at the sleeping young man, Lightning couldn't help but give a huff in annoyance. "Honestly, Hope, can't you keep your morals to yourself. Especially within my own mind." Chuckling, she shook her head. "And now you have me talking to myself like a loon."

Inwardly, she admired Hope's determination, his 'give all, do all' nature towards everything. She always had. But on this issue, she had to disagree. I mean, how deep does his reservation towards killing lie? Could he kill Castea when the chance comes? Lightning could only shudder at the thought, because, deep down, she couldn't see him pulling the trigger. Yes, he'd killed people before. She'd trained him to do so. He'd killed people that had done far less than Castea. But with his deep seeded hatred for killing resurfacing, and after the incident in the mountain, she could see Hope choking when being faced with the opportunity.

And the result would be horrifying.

The ruins of the once supposedly grand kingdom sat before her, leading Lightning's mind only deeper into chaos. Is this how Academia would look? If Hope brought back the Maker… Academia would become the same. A crumbled ghost town. As well as the rest of the world. Or… would it all just vanish?

Never being one much for religion, Lightning had never cared to lend a thought towards the gods. Not until their branding, of course. And even then, she'd merely thought them to be useless and overrated. She and her friends had been used as tools to bring the almighty Bhunivelze back and none of the gods had done anything to stop the fal'Cie. Almighty, my ass.

And it was all happening again. This time to Hope alone. Despite her words, she wasn't going to watch from the sidelines, no matter how idiotic Hope was being. She wasn't going to have Hope fight alone. And she most certainly wasn't going to let Castea win.

Even if she had to pull the trigger herself.

"Your fascination with her is quite intriguing, Sebastian." Castea cast her gaze upwards toward the l'Cie at her side. She had been giving the man his freedom in messing with the Farron girl, but she couldn't say that she wasn't interested as to why he fancied her so much. Maybe it was her likeness to his late wife…

Sebastian gave a faint smile. "I find her about as amusing as you do the Estheim boy," he responded, his tone formal, yet tinged with the familiar affection he couldn't hide. "She is merely a toy, as you would put it. Fascinating and entertaining, but ultimately meaningless. And as you well know, this heart beats for only you, my lady." A bow was given as he put his hand over his heart to accentuate his point.

Ever the loyal dog. With a nod, she let herself stare back out across the landscape, a sigh of boredom slipping through her lips. "They are nearing Pulse's Castle. I want you ready and waiting. I'll let you have your fun as I get what's rightfully mine. I'll even keep the others entertained for you." A wistful eagerness lit up her eyes as she smirked at her right-hand man. "As soon as that piece of the crystal is in his hands, it shall be time to play."

Whereas Etro's Shrine was tall and slender, willowy much like a lone tower, Pulse's Castle was very large and wide. Its height was nearly half of Etro's, but it made up for this shortcoming with its breadth. It was giant and perfectly crafted, at least to Hope's perception, though there was one thing that he couldn't help but find agitating about the castle.

It didn't have an entrance.

There were no doors, no windows, no possible airways for ventilation, nothing. It held firm to its title of impenetrable.

"Maybe it's just for looks. Made to be worshiped in Pulse's place." Sazh turned his head to the side, hand coming to his chin as he rubbed his beard in thought. "Maybe they worshipped in the courtyard?"

"Not a very appealing thought, Sazh. I don't see a piece of crystal anywhere, do you? There's gotta be a way in." Zalera stood before the castle and eyed it, trying to pull up an idea, a memory, anything. She had passed this structure many times throughout the years with Yeul's tribe. Something about it had to have come up in conversation. All she could remember was that it had been sealed back during the War of Transgression. All doors and windows had been taken out and replaced by solid stone in hopes of keeping out anyone who would want to harm it.

Lightning came back around, having circled the perimeter twice, not finding a single clue. "I don't get it. Why make a building no one can enter?"

"It was sealed to protect it," spoke Zalera, her eyes scanning over its walls. There has to be a trick. They couldn't have wanted to secure it forever.

"From who?" Zalera ignored the question as if it held an obvious answer. And, really, it did. "From us."

Zalera sighed at Lightning's words. The animosity between the people of Cocoon and Pulse had been at its highest during the war. The Pulsians had wanted no chance of others getting into their sacred ground of worship. They would rather see it destroyed. Those that had worshiped Lindzei had felt the same. From what Zalera had heard, their methods had been even more drastic.

Hope stood before a large, rough stone set in the middle of the courtyard. His eyes swept over it, taking in the intricate designs and patterns that wound around a weeping face. A sizable tear, also intricately etched with a swirling pattern, fell just inches from the face's right eye. There were two holes within the stone, the rims around them left jagged, as if pieces had been harshly scraped out. A sentence was written at the top of the statue in what had to be a very ancient Pulsian language.

It has to be significant. It wouldn't exist if it wasn't significant. There was nothing else within miles of the castle. No other buildings or towns. No other stones or rocks. There weren't even any trees or bushes or brush at all. Just a lonely castle and its little statue.

"Why don't we just blow a hole in it? That'll get the job done."

Hope gave Sazh a glare, but it wasn't he who came to the castle's defense.

Zalera smacked the old pilot on the back of his head. "You want to just smash our way into a sacred castle? Yeah, that's a brilliant plan."

"Besides," added Lightning, "If the crystal is really in there, then there's probably some way of getting to it. And something guarding it, for sure."

"Could'a done without ya hittin' me. Whatever happened to-"

"Respecting your elders. Blah, blah, blah. Sorry. I seem to forget someone's age when they say something moronic."

"And you thought you could smack some sense into me?" Zalera gave a shrug. Sazh sighed. "You really think someone could be guarding it? How could a person survive in there?"

Lightning's return was automatic. "Who said they had to be human?"

"Zalera, can you read this?" Hope called, his eyes glued to the symbols in the stone. He had studied a lot of Pulsian language, but all he could make out of this was a very basic water symbol and some scrawls that suggested some sort of 'light of despair'. If I even read that right…

The Pulsian joined his side, her brow scrunching up in concentration as she read. "I… don't know if I can read this. I-It's in what looks to be Hatvian? Only Pulsian elders use this language."

Hope's shoulders slumped, but the news did nothing to his determination. He knew that there had to be some kind of connection. They had to figure it out. "You can try, right? Here." Hope brushed his fingers under a circle that had two tails. "This is a symbol for water, right?"

A moment's pause was given before she shook her head. "This symbol next to it – with the slash – makes it mean 'tears', I think." Zalera took a step back, reexamining the words. Hope's eyes lit up as he could see her mind working. "And this cluster of symbols here has to mean cry, or-or weep. No, wept, it means wept. The tears past wept shall… find…? I don't know."

"No! You're getting there. C'mon." Hope brought Zalera's concentration back to the scripture. "I know in some cultures of Pulse, this means light. 'Light of despair', maybe?"

Zalera narrowed her eyes at the few marks that Hope was pointing to. In her culture, in their era, it meant light, but in previous eras… Dammit, I didn't learn languages. I was trained to fight instead. Stretching her mind, Zalera could recall some of Yeul's Guardian's words. He spoke in a few different tongues and, at one time, it had been extremely fascinating to her. It had taken her a while, a long while, but she had managed to get him to teach her some of it… "Path! Now it means light, but before it meant path. And that doesn't mean despair. It means sadness. Or… sorrow? But with the Ith here it's plural. It means sorrows!" Zalera exclaimed in triumph.

"Keep going," Hope urged.

While she and Hope worked, Sazh continued to examine the building before them and Lightning took to staring at the rough statue as well, only her eyes were drawn to the missing pieces as she knelt before it. They were definitely taken out deliberately. Both of the holes were about the same size and appeared to be following a path down from the face's eyes. Like the tear. In fact, they're the same size as the tear…

"'The sorrows once wept shall lead the way'!" Hope smiled brilliantly at Zalera, giving her a high five in glee. "Yes, now, what does it mean?"

"If ya even got the translation right, you mean?" Sazh came up to their sides, idly tossing a small rock in the air.

Zalera turned towards him, glowering at the man. "You wanna give it a go?"

"Nope, not even gonna attempt."

Lightning stood abruptly, drawing everyone's attention. "This is what it means," she cut in, pointing at the holes. "They're tears. The missing parts are tears."

"Of course," spoke Hope. "'The sorrows once wept'… they're tears. So… if we find them, it'll give us a path."

I could really use some more glowing daisies right about now. "How exactly would that work? And where in the-fuck!" Zalera clutched onto her foot as she stared at the sharp rock that had landed on it. "Sazh, watch where you're tossing things." Zalera grabbed the rock and half-heartedly tossed it at Sazh.

"Hey!" The man ducked, narrowly escaping a blow to the forehead. "It slipped. No need to get all homicidal!"

"Oh, you don't want to see me get homicidal."

Lightning ignored their banter and wandered over to where the rock had landed. There had been something odd on that rock. "Thought so," commented the roseate as she picked up the rock that wasn't just any ordinary rock. It was a piece of stone. A piece of very familiar stone.

"What is it?" Hope watched as Lightning brought it over. Shock registered on his face as he got a closer look. "How did you notice that?" It had designs etched into the smooth face of the stone. Designs that perfectly matched the tear on the statue. "It's a tear!"

"I noticed it while Zalera had it in her hand."

Sazh gaped. "You could see that from over there? For that brief amount of time?"

"Trained eyes." Lightning smirked at his expression. "Where did you find this at?" The soldier pushed it into the hole, flinching when a loud sound echoed after the tear's placement was sealed.

"What was that?" Sazh looked around the area, only a plain field and a castle in sight.

"It sounded like a click. Did we just unlock something?" Hope's eyes went back to the stone. I guess it worked.

Determined, Lightning made her way back towards the castle. "Spread out. We need to find the last one."

"Hold it." Hope scooped the tear back out, cringing as another sound echoed. He held it in his hand, studying its formation, feeling its curves and edges with his fingers. "There's no way to know if that other tear is even here. Sazh finding this could have been a stroke of luck. And if it is here, it could take hours to find. Hours we don't have." Hope opened his other hand beside it and concentrated his energy into his palm. Please work. Hope's confidence in his magic had diminished since his last performance. On one hand, he had easily been able to draw up the abilities necessary in their battle. On the other, there was a deep want to toss away all of his responsibilities and never use his brand again. He supposed that that desire had always been present. His resentment towards his brand had just grown even more as a result of recent events.

Stop it, you're fine. Just concentrate. We have to get in. You can't keep agonizing over this. Slowly, he brought up a blizzard spell. It was small and very concentrated, but that was the point. Drawing out the spell, he began to manipulate the ice within his hand, hoping to morph it into shape.

Lightning watched, amazed and astonished, as the ice swirled and spun, dancing in his palm. Hope worked the ice until it was almost an identical form of the tear. He clicked the stone tear into place before pushing the ice one in the spot beside it. Two more clicks thundered around them.

"I can't believe that actually worked."

Sazh stared dumbfounded at the statue, agreeing fully with Hope's comment. Before he could form a response, however, the ground started to shake and shiver. The ground beneath the statue began moving back, causing everyone to scramble away from it. It shifted and rolled back a good fifty feet before it stopped, leaving a dark chasm open in the ground.

"Oh, yay, look. Another underground tunnel," Zalera drawled with a less than joyful edge to her tone.

Sazh just continued to stare, marveling at the sight, though he could relate to Zalera's feelings towards another coming escapade beneath ground. He had just gotten a small feeling of security back. Now he could almost imagine beady red eyes glaring at him from within the dark passageway. Sazh swallowed. "How'd you know that would work?"

The teen pushed himself up from where he'd gracelessly fallen back and stared out at the new path. "I didn't." Taking a step, Hope began to walk forward when he was stopped by an abrupt arm at his chest.

"What are you doing?"

Hope gave Lightning a slow blink as if the answer should have been apparent. "Investigating. I imagine we aren't going to just gawk at it forever."

"I'm okay with gawking. Gawking's good," Sazh piped in.

Lightning ignored him. "You can't just dive right in. I think we all learned our lesson last time."

"I wasn't going to," spoke Hope through contained frustration. "I-"

"We aren't sure where this leads," Zalera added, hoping to knock out the tension before it could grow any stronger. "I mean, sure, the assumption would be that this leads us into Pulse's Castle or at least to the crystal, but it's not certain. It could be a trap, for all we know. The crystal's bound to have some safeguards."

Hope drew in a deep breath. He knew all of this. He knew he had to be cautious. "I get all that. I do. But what other choice do we have? It's our only clue as to where to go." Did they just go through all of that to come at a standstill over a hole?

Lightning gave the new opening a glance. Hope had a point, but so did Zalera. "I'll lead."

Hope scoffed, but stepped aside and gave her a mock bow, gesturing her forward. "Whatever you say."

The restrained hostility was clear, the bitterness obvious, but she simply clenched her jaw and walked forward. Hers and Hope's interaction was bound to be heavy with unpleasantness, but she would prefer that any day over his death due to a lack of caution. Besides, if the feeling in her gut was any indication, her silent battle with Hope was going to be the least of their worries.