The aliens are here! Witness the Tenth Doctor at his loquacious best! Enjoy!
DAY THREE: Part VIII
"What do you think you're doing?" Jack asked. The three doctors in remote locales in hospitals across the world could hear everything happening inside the Torchwood hub, through the Doctor and Jack's Bluetooth devices.
"I'm going with you," said Gwen. She cocked a weapon.
"No, you're not, sweetheart," Jack protested. He took her by the shoulders and pushed her back down onto her chair. "You need to let us handle it. We've been through this."
"You're being bloody stupid," Gwen shouted, leaping back up to her feet. "Both of you! And you're a complete nutter if you think I'm going to just fall in line because you called me sweetheart. And if you ever do that condescending taking-me-by-the-shoulders thing again…" Her voice had been reduced to something like a hiss.
"Gwen you're not in charge here," Jack insisted. "And frankly, neither am I. The Doctor is. He says it's two, so it's two. That's the end of it."
"All due respect, sir, I don't think it's prudent for just two of you to go in there," Ianto added. "Unarmed. We have no idea how large this thing is, what kind of power it wields…"
"Normally, you know I would agree with you. But, we've got him," Jack told him, gesturing toward the Doctor. "He's like having our own personal alien battalion."
Ianto looked the Doctor up and down. Frankly, for the last couple of days, Ianto had been feeling torn between jealousy and admiration whenever the Doctor was about. He was not about to show either one of those emotions to the Doctor himself – not ever. "All right," he replied, tight-lipped. "But he doesn't look like a battalion.
"Given," said the Doctor, suspecting of Ianto's conflicting emotions. "But I have a respiratory bypass system, a good friend who can't be killed: two absolutely necessary attributes for going into the presence of an alien species who may very well detonate a gas bomb or a biological weapon. And I don't do armed."
"What about the rest of the building?" asked Ianto.
"I've seen to that, too," the Doctor assured him. "I didn't just put a standard perception filter over the room. It's even more like the TARDIS than that. It's fooling everyone into thinking it's in a different dimensional space, like the TARDIS is. Right now, that room doesn't even share the same oxygen as the rest of the building. It sort of doesn't even exist in this reality right now."
"But we can come and go from it as we please, right?" asked Jack.
"Yeah," the Doctor said. "It's all just… technical mumbo jumbo. If we open the doors, we can still walk back out into the hallway."
Jack nodded his approval.
Ianto pursed his lips, not knowing what to say. Gwen clicked her tongue and put all her weight on one hip as she slung the weapon over her shoulder. Even she did not have something smart to say to that. Rhys chuckled at her.
"What you have, my Torchwood friends," the Doctor continued. "Is three sets of eagle eyes and a vested interest in the people involved. Two absolutely necessary attributes for a computer surveillance team, sitting at the heart of the technical operation. And our white-coat-wearing comrades…"
"…they've got good looks and nimble tongues," Jack finished.
They all stared at him.
"What? They're charming and can speak foreign languages, and can convince others to do things for them. That's all I meant."
"Jack, rein it in, will you?" the Doctor groaned.
"And they've got medical degrees," Jack added, feigning exasperation. "I was getting to that."
Dekker had spent the last several hours adjusting and re-adjusting the habitat created for the 456's arrival. He tightened the screws holding the thing together, he dialled up and down the chemicals, took readings again and again, and mightily resisted the urge to do inappropriate things in front of the security cameras, just because he could.
He didn't want to venture out into the hallway for fear of running into Frobisher, or anyone else. He had no idea what would happen to the Doctor's perception filter if any sort of attention was drawn to it, whether he could blow its cover, so he decided not to take any chances.
"Oh thank God," he muttered as he heard the TARDIS gears sounding in the large room. When the Doctor stepped out with pretty Jack, Dekker called out, "Well, it's about bloody time."
"I knew you were going to say that," the Doctor said, biting his lip, hands in pockets. "Always a pleasure, Mr. Dekker."
"Good seeing you, too. But you already knew that, didn't you?" Dekker said silkily. "And Captain, ditto."
"You just keep your thoughts to yourself from now on," the Doctor said. "I don't want to hear a peep out of you unless life or limb is at stake, all right?"
Dekker made a big show of zipping his lips and throwing away the key.
"Have you tested the system?" asked the Doctor.
Dekker just nodded.
"What did you do?"
Dekker shrugged.
"Oh, for pity's sake," the Doctor yelled. "We have about five minutes before these things get here. Quit playing stupid games and tell me!"
"I shouted things at the cameras, including that I would be bringing outsiders in, to threaten national security, all right? And no-one said boo about it, so I think we're safe."
"Good."
The Doctor dashed into the corners and tested all the little plastic pieces with the sonic. Next he seemed to be checking the exits, verifying that the room was sealed. The device made noises that apparently pleased him.
"Doctor, what do you need from me?" asked Jack.
"Keep him quiet," the Doctor said, not looking up. "And stand there looking threatening. That military garb of yours can do wonders."
"That's it? You might as well have me mopping floors."
"Jack," the Doctor sighed. "That's why I brought you. That's why I bring you into the places I do. Because you'll know when to jump in. I don't have to prepare you for absolutely every contingency. Just… have some common sense and you'll be fine."
"You're trusting me to show common sense?" Jack asked. "Are you feeling feverish in any way?"
The Doctor strode up to his friend. "Are you going to let me die, or do something stupid that will destroy the planet?"
"No."
"Good. I didn't think so. Are you going to let Dekker the idiot savant die, or do something stupid that will destroy the planet?"
"No."
"Will you know those things if and when you see them?"
"Probably."
"Then my plan is flawless. You see how that works?"
"You should have let me stay behind and rig up something with the rift, and brought Martha in here with you," Jack protested. "She can do this, but she can't manipulate the rift!"
"I don't need the rift, Jack. What I need is someone at my right hand who is invulnerable to disease and gas attack, and a medical professional. I could have sent you to Japan to deal with cerebral hemorrhaging and dangerously increased heart rates, anesthetic balances and children passing out from high-frequency pressure causing the brain to swell against the parietal bone. And I suppose I could have brought Martha in here and just crossed my fingers that she'd survive a biological attack… but it just seems a bit imprudent, given that she's a doctor and you're immortal."
Jack's answer was cut off by a loud noise. Suddenly, there was a slight quake, the boom of something big coming close.
"Oh, hello," the Doctor muttered. "Nothing like making an entrance."
Within seconds, the room was flooded with blood orange light as a big ball of fire filled the inside of the giant aquarium thing that Dekker had constructed. The glass structure was teeming with flames and gas and smoke, and the being inside seemed to settle in, and let out a long, disgusting exhale.
Dekker leaned over and whispered to Jack, "Are you lot going to tell me that the suits downstairs didn't hear that?"
"They heard it," Jack whispered back. "But as I understand the perception filter, they'll either have vaguely forgotten about it once the alien is in this room… or they won't be able to find the room."
"That makes no sense."
"I'm the wrong guy to ask," Jack said. "But don't bother him now – he's busy."
The gas and smoke continued to teem within, and the alien itself was not visible to the humanoids outside the box. No-one moved for a few moments. Then, the Doctor, as usual, broke the silence.
"Well, hello there," the Doctor said. "Did you have a nice trip?"
Silence.
"You know what, mister?" he asked, striding forward toward the tank. He knocked on the glass. "You've been scaring the pants off these poor people. I think you owe them an apology, don't you? It's only the polite thing to do, since you are, technically, on their turf, and they've been so gracious in accommodating you. How many house guests on this planet do you think get their own poisonous habitat built for them in the host's living room, eh?"
Silence.
"Well, guests who aren't tropical fish, anyway."
Silence.
The Doctor took several steps back from the tank and regarded it, hands in pockets. He looked it over, and marvelled at the impracticality of it. Why would an alien species invade any planet where they couldn't breathe? He knew the answer, of course, but it still seemed daft to him.
"But you're not so big now, in your little glass bubble, are you? What exactly do you hope to accomplish from there? Will you be relying upon your ominous presence to make the whole planet bow and do your bidding? Come on! You've clearly never met a human being in your life! You'd need minions for something like that, and I reckon you haven't got any. And even if you did, they'd all have to be all shut up in a tank somewhere just like you. Not an easy way to intimidate a planet, I have to say. Just ask Howard Hughes."
Silence.
"Besides, if I had to guess, I'd say that you are the minion. What do you say, am I right? I'm right, aren't I?"
"I am a soldier," the thing in the tank said.
"Oh, it speaks! Well done, that," the Doctor said. He took a deep breath and looked the tank over once more. "I'll give you one thing, you are a clever lot. Making the kids speak in unison, and in English! Mind you, in certain parts of the world, that alone could get a person killed. Very cheeky of you, sir. Are you a sir? I don't know, I don't want to make assumptions. I'm an equal opportunity sort of a bloke."
Silence. A longer one this time, as the Doctor's demeanour changed. The whimsy in his voice disappeared, if only temporarily.
"You're the SharKann," he said. "And you're here for the children, correct?"
"You call us the 456," a voice said. It was a deep, rough, reverberating voice. And it didn't so much sound out in the room as in their minds. It was the voice that Jack imagined the devil must possess, if there were such a thing. It spoke slowly, deliberately, as though hampered by a great weight. It seemed to speak perfect English with the local accent, which somehow made the whole phenomenon even creepier. Even to someone who did not speak with the local accent, like Jack, it felt a bit too close to home. Ordinarily, Jack would have assumed that it was the TARDIS translating for him, but given the last few days, the broadcasts of We are coming, he reckoned it was a linguistic skill on the part of the SharKann. They knew English, somehow.
"No, the humans call you the 456 after the frequency you use to communicate," the Doctor corrected. "They had no other tools for naming you. I am not human. I do, however, speak on their behalf. And I know you well."
There was another long silence. "Who are you?" it asked, finally.
"We'll get to that later. What are your demands?" The Doctor crossed his arms over his chest and scowled, standing with his feet apart. Jack liked it when he did that. It meant that the Doctor meant business.
"We have only one."
"And that would be?"
"Ten per cent."
The Doctor's jaw dropped. He pitched forward in shock. "What? Are you mad? I mean, I'm not kidding… have you gone completely sack o' hammers, mate? Ten per cent?" He started laughing. "That is so, so, so never going to happen."
"Then we will vaporise the planet and all of its inhabitants. We require ten per cent."
For the first time, one of the MD's voices came through over the Bluetooth. "No fucking way," Tom exclaimed. "Tell them no, Doctor!"
"Ten per cent of what?" It was Martha. She was pretty sure she knew the answer, but she wanted confirmation.
"The kids, Martha," said Tom. "They want our kids."
"Shhhh," Jack shot at them. "Guys, not now."
"All right, all right, just to clarify," the Doctor said, beginning to pace in circles in front of the tank. "You want ten per cent of the population of human children, to take back to your planet with you."
"Yes."
"And they will never, ever be returned, never see their families again."
The Doctor and Jack could hear gasps through the Bluetooth.
"Yes."
"And they will live horrible meaningless, empty, torturous existences before they finally die from exhaustion after an unnaturally prolonged life, say two or three hundred years from now."
A delay, and then, "Yes."
"And you think the people of Earth will agree to this."
"We offer a choice."
"Their children or their planet? That's not a choice, it's a threat. It's an ultimatum. It's like battlefield tactics for the mentally challenged. That is completely without scruple, completely without honour. Are you a race without honour?"
Another delay. "No."
"If you had true honour, you'd allow them to fight properly for their children, give them a chance," the Doctor said. "Don't just wield your almighty powers of destruction and expect them to bow down. Where's the honour in that? Where's the fight?"
"We require ten per cent."
"Yeah, I know. You said that already. And don't think I haven't noticed that you have deftly avoided my question. Where is your honour?"
"We require ten per cent."
"And I've already said it's not going to happen. So get back in your ship and go home."
"Those terms are unacceptable."
"Oh yes?"
"Yes."
"Well, my friend, this is the part of the story when I give you a choice. The same kind of choice, except that if you choose wisely, no-one gets hurt. I'm not going to give you a lose-lose scenario, as you have given the Earth."
"Explain."
The Doctor began to pace again. "See, you come here with your creepy broadcast system and your threats and your deep gravelly voice and your clipped, clean syllables, and yeah yeah, you're terrifying and all that. Chances are, the humans would try and find a way to work with you, because it's what they do when the chips are down. Or they would try to nuke you, because that's also what they do.
"But you've forgotten one thing. Children are the greatest resource of this planet – they always have been. Humans, they put the fate of their world in the hands of the children, they have hope that the next generation will fix everything, see the world through to the next life and the next after that. The bonds between generations are nothing to be trifled with, which is something that you, the SharKann could never understand. And that is why you will lose."
The alien seemed to contemplate, then it said, "Incorrect."
The Doctor smiled wickedly.
"Oh, that's right," he said. "I am incorrect, you've got me there. Can't pull one over on you, can I?"
He paused and gave a pregnant silence, then continued. "Because you do understand. You do understand that bond, the desire to protect your young, the survival instinct that makes children precious, don't you? Ahhh, yes. The SharKann and their important generational transitions."
Silence.
"Captain?" the Doctor said. He reached out.
Jack turned and entered the TARDIS. Ten seconds later, he returned with the coconut-shaped egg sac, and he put it in the Doctor's hand.
The Doctor asked the alien, "Can you see what I'm holding?"
"Yes."
"Does it make you nervous?"
"How did you obtain it? We demand to know."
"Flew to your planet and nicked it," the Doctor answered, holding the sac in one hand, admiring it.
"That is impossible."
"It's really not, because well, here it is," the Doctor said, looking at it, turning it over in his hands. "And like I told you before, I'm not human. Everything you know about the human race is now out the window because you're dealing with me now. And believe me, you don't want to do that if you can help it."
"Explain yourself."
"If you don't leave, I'll destroy the egg sac. You threaten our kids, we threaten yours, simple as that."
"No. Explain… your… self."
The Time Lord smirked. "I'm the Doctor. This is the Earth. Not a good combo for those who seek to destroy. You should consider that your only warning."
"Awesome!" Jack exclaimed, whispering.
"I love when he does that," Martha responded quietly into the Bluetooth system.
A long pause extended and heightened the moment. Jack and Dekker looked at each other and shrugged. Through the Bluetooth, the Doctor could hear Rupesh whisper, "What's going on now?" and Tom whisper back that he didn't know.
"Collateral damage," the alien finally said. "Saving the life of this young does not balance equally with relinquishing the human children, and the needs of our world. Your plan has failed."
"Mm, yeah, too bad," said the Doctor. "But you might want to reconsider, because… well, did I mention that I can travel in time? Yeah, I can. So I nipped back a hundred years, give or take, and I swiped this egg sac from the royal household. Incubating inside this little coconut is the Crown Prince Rthedd."
They could hear the alien breathing, but it did not speak.
"Oh, don't have a growly-groany answer for that do you, smart guy? Interesting. Because as you know, being a seasoned time-traveller yourself, this guy's birth is a fixed point in time. He ushers your planet into a new era of technology, new techniques in battle and recreation. He brings you lot out of the dark ages, and fathers the twin princesses who utterly defeat your greatest enemies, the MorDarians and assimilate them into your culture as lower-class citizens. Not something I condone, mind you, but history says it is what it is. The MorDarians then wither away, paving the way for you to take over their trade routes and negotiate with planets previously sealed off to you. Oh, my lonely friend, your choice is clear, I think."
More, harder breathing.
"Think of it. Think of the strange and dark world you would return to," the Doctor goaded. "Because if Prince Rthedd dies in infancy, then his brother Smydded will come to power in a few years, and he is… well, he's a bit special, isn't he? Not as clever as his brother by a long shot, and he fathers a pair of illegitimate drunken sons who nearly disintegrate the Vozterian jungle which provides all of the nutrients in the soil for your planet. You want them in charge, with no twin princesses to temper them?"
Another long silence ensued. Tense and quiet, the SharKann in the cage seemed to contemplate.
But the Doctor kept running.
"And by the way, long as we're on the subject, I really don't fancy causing a paradox, because Rthedd signed the treaty that allowed human pre-adolescent endorphins to be trafficked into your world as a drug, which is why you are here. So if that doesn't happen, then you never come here and this is all just a great big, timey wimey mess. It might end in the destruction of your world, and I really don't fancy that, either. Odd, isn't it? I try not to annihilate planets. Or, at least I've been cutting way back."
In the ensuing silence, Dekker commented to Jack, "Blimey, when I knew him before, he was more the strong silent type."
Jack chuckled. "These days, when you go into the belly of the beast with the Doctor, you have to be prepared for some talking. A whole lot of it."
"We require ten per cent," the SharKann said at last.
The Doctor's eyes grew steely and mean. His teeth gritted and he held the egg closely, in one hand. "You really need to think this over."
"No."
"I'm giving you one more chance."
"We will not accept. We require ten per cent."
"All right. You asked for it," the Doctor said. "Martha, Tom, Rupesh, you're on."