A/N: Hello everyone! Yep here's number 25. I'm sorry about what I've done to Edmond, but it had to be done. Yeah well, we'll see what's going to happen. Enjoy and if you have some spare time, I'd greatly appreciate a review :P

Chapter 25: A Life in Shatters

„You've already met? When?" Christine rushed to her side. "Was it in that duke's house?"

„We met a few weeks ago." How should she explain to them that she already knew Antoine more than necessary and without telling them about Cináed? "We talked only a little before he went to meet with His Grace." Yes, that sounded well enough.

Christine eyed her skeptically. "What did you talk about? He doesn't seem like a fun sort of fellow."

"Do we know the duke? Does he participate in the chase?" Michel seemed deep in thought, obviously trying to remember who it could be. "Is it the duke of Orléans? No, eh?"

"Where does he live? Edmond, do you know the man?"

Edmond had remained silent until that point, his angry stare holding her in place. She silently begged him not to say anything. But why was he so angry? Did he knew something? Probably, as he was the one who knew where she had really been all this time.

He suddenly turned and left the house, leaving a confused Christine and Michel and a shivering Georgiana behind. What should she do? Follow him? Stay? They had to talk eventually and so she decided to do the former.

"Edmond!" The cold wind made her wince as soon as she stepped out of the house. "Edmond!" She shouted his name another time, but he would not answer. As all the snow had melted away she could not follow him by his footprints. She walked around the house and then made her way to the stables. That was where she found him.

He was sitting on a wooden box, playing with something small in his hands. She suddenly was hit by the difference between him and Cináed.

Edmond was not quite as tall, but because of the hard labour on the fields his arms were very muscular, his skin tanned even at this time of the year. His eyes were as blue as the ocean in the many paintings she had seen in Cináed's old study and his blond hair was short and straight. His angel-like face, the one she always had admired for its brightness and softness, had become an open book to her. He could not hide his emotions from her. With his twenty-one years he reminded her still of the boy she had grown up with.

Cináed on the other hand…he was certainly taller. His figure was perhaps not as bold, but he was well-shaped with smooth yet defined muscles. His long slender fingers were the ones of a pianist, and every one of his movement's was like the steps of a dance, with their elegance and obvious gentility. He was noble, but while others like Antoine appeared shabby while trying to be something better, he exuded true superiority. His skin was as white as snow, reminding her of the marble sculptures she had seen on display in his house and contrasting with his dark curly hair. Everything about him reminded her of the predator behind the mask, especially his eyes. She had read in a book that mercury was highly toxic and she knew that to be right. Looking into his dark orbs had left her every time unable to breathe. She had learned to read the expression in them, but only to a certain point. Never could she be sure what he was really thinking.

They were like black and white, night and day. She felt a pang in her chest at the thought. "Edmond." She slowly approached him.

He did not look up at her and continued to stare on the ground. When he sighted he still sounded angry, although she could also hear exhaustion in his voice. "When you exchanged yourself for me that night so I could go home, I felt so guilty." He pressed his index finger and thumb against the base of his nose. "As soon as I recovered I wanted to come, to rescue you. I thought you were in danger. I thought you'd be happy to return home with me." Then he lifted his head and the look in his eyes burned with furry. "Are you his mistress?"

She gasped. "What? No! Whom are you talking about?" What did he mean by this question? "Antoine? How can you think that?" Her eyes widened in disbelief. He knew her too well to asume anything like that.

"No, I'm not referring to Antoine!" He turned towards her. "I mean the creature that attacked me. I mean the beast in whose house you have lived. I mean the bloody monster that almost killed our father! Are you his whore?"

He was boiling with furry, but she did not know why. What had she done? She had not talked about the whole affair. No one besides them knew what had really happened three months ago, when she had exchanged her freedom for his. But why was he then behaving like this?

"Do you actually listen to what you're saying?" She shook her head, her racing heart beat clearly audible to her. She tried to speak with a calmer voice. "I'm nobody's whore." Why was he saying that? The whole scene felt strangely familiar and she decided she should always hate the mere word déjà-vu.

He was breathing hard. "Don't lie to me! Don't you dare lie to me! I've seen the way you two looked at each other." He began to pace around the stable hallway.

"What are you talking about?" He had seen them? When? Where?

"A few days after Antoine arrived. It's no secret that he came to the château. I saw how you two were standing outside in the darkness. I wanted to come forward, I thought he was forcing you to stay there in the cold with him, but them he stood up and touched you. And you did not push him away. Tell me, am I lying?"

She knew exactly when he had seen them – the night she had talked with Cináed about his title and about Antoine. The night when he had pushed a lock of her hair behind her ear, barely touching her skin. The night she had turned her head away from him and cried alone in the darkness because of Edmond. He had been there. He had seen them interact and jumped to his own conclusions.

"Edmond, that was nothing. Really, nothing happened. And he didn't force me. Believe me, if you knew him..."

"Am I lying? Is that what you want to imply, whore?"

"I am not his whore! Stop calling me that!"

"What are you then? Have you developed feelings for the bastard?" He laughed and it caused goose bumps to appear on her arms. It was as cold as the winter air surrounding them. " You have given yourself to a monster, willently. He's not even human! Was it his wealth or his status, maybe both?"

"What?"

"You don't expect me to believe that you didn't see anything in all this time? I know that he showed you. He's not human, Georgiana. I don't know what he is, but he's not human, not normal. A freak, a monstrosity! A creature send from hell! How could you give youself to something like that?"

"Why do you do that?" She fought against the tears. She would not cry now. "You don't even know him!"

"I know that he's a killer without scruples, that's more then enough!" He looked at her, his eyes piercing into her soul.

"What has he done to you Georgiana? What has he done for you to defend him? You were the woman I loved, the woman I wanted to marry, to build a life with!" He suddenly sounded as frustrated as her.

"I still am that woman! Nothing has changed! Nothing at all." What was happening? It felt so unreal. Her voice was hoarse from yelling in the coldness. She could barely even whisper. "I did not give myself to him."

"Tell me once and for all, do you love him?"

"I…"

"Do you love him?"

She stared back at him. She wished she could answer him, tell him that no, she loved none but him, her beloved Edmond. She wanted to tell him that it was all a lie and that she did not love Cináed. She could never love a monster, a killer, a beast. Yes, she knew everything Edmond had said and more. He was nothing but a horrible monster, a creature without fellings. She wanted it so badly, but her mouth would not open, because she knew that she could not lie to him anymore, and suddenly she knew that it would be a lie.

How could she tell him of her love, if she still felt Cináed's lips on hers, Cináed's fingers on her skin, Cináed's scent and voice and eyes? The way he had played the piano with such emotion, such passion, the way his face had lit up every time he had given her one of his smiles, the hours they had spent together reading and discussing?

She had never tasted Edmond's lips, they had never in all that time shared one single kiss. Always she had turned her head away or would indicate at something imaginary in the distance. Not one kiss, and now she knew why - she had never wanted to kiss him. She had never really felt that way about him, but with Cináed...

Her lips would not move and in that moment she realized she had destroyed every chance of ever returning to her former life.

The emotions washed over his features, one after the other – understanding, confusion, frustration, exhaustion, anger.

Neither of them dared to move, their breaths visible in the cold air inside the stables. With a sudden motion he turned and threw something at the wall, the sound of wood clashing making her flinch. Then he spat on the floor and left.

She could no longer stand upright. Her whole body was shaking enormously. It felt like somebody had rammed a stake through her heart. She could not breathe.

The tears would not stop, ruining her expensive gown. She laughed, or rather choked at her own sense of irony. Gallows humour, she thought with a sour taste on her tongue. She would change later into one of her own. She rubbed with her palm over her face, and her eyes focused on something small underneath the spot where he had thrown something at the wall. She crawled, as her legs were still to weak. There, lying on the damp ground was the tiny wooden heart.

It hit her like a lightning – it would never be as it used to. She had lost everything in a matter of seconds. A happy, quiet, uncomplicated life - the chance was gone and would never come back.

"Why has everything to be so complicated?" What had happened to her peaceful, normal life at the farm? The change was grotesque.

As she was crouching there on the floor, shaking and rocking herself forth and back in an attempt to keep further tears from rolling down her cheeks, she wished for the first time that Cináed would be there.