Not Alone Anymore Chapter 25: Nothing Can Be Explained, a bleach fanfic

Mori: OMGSH! I'M WRITING! .

I have to be honest with all of you and admit that I had lost interest in this story for a while. (sobs) BUT! I'm back now! And I have a few new ideas! SOMEONE MAGICALLY FED THE DIEING BRAIN CELLS THAT NEEDED SO MUCH NOURISHMENT!

I'm suddenly having like an implosion of thoughts! It's like someone deliberately lit a sparkler and a flash bug inside my head at the same time! I better use it before someone realizes that it's pretty dangerous and puts it out (does that even make sense to you?)

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJ

Raven curled up in a fetal position on the hardwood floor of her room. She was still at her sensei's house and since she had lived there before, in previous years, she had a room to call her own. Though it wasn't as decorated as her old room from when she was a child, it felt roomy and comfortable enough to stay in for the time being.

She clutched her chest in agony; her breathing rapid and uneven. She coughed a few times, sweat pouring down her temple, and continued to be in complete pain. Her heart seemed to expand and contract wildly, wanting to first break her rib cage then through her skin and flop away. She tightly shut her eyes, waiting for the pain to go away.

"Please," She begged to no one, or thing, in particular, "Please. Stop. Stop. Calm down," It was early in the morning, too early for any creature to be awake at such an hour. There was no way she would wake Sensei to help her. He would only yell at her and tell her that it was all in her mind, and then proceed to sleep comfortably.

Slowly, the agony became a mere throbbing pain. Raven flopped on her side onto the futon beside her hand began to try and calm her breathing as much as possible. It seemed as if her useless pleas fell upon some god of mercy's ears. Though her breathing was still a bit uneven and ragged, she began to drift off into sleep once more, the throbbing pain now a dull ache.

Raven couldn't remember how long it had been since her Sensei had found her in the family's shrine, or what had really happened to her while she was away from him. She couldn't think anymore on the subject as her eyes began to feel like lead. She didn't fight the urge to sleep. She wanted sleep to overcome her, to take her and tell her that she no longer needed to worry about living in the world. She wanted to live out the perfect life she wanted in whatever way she pleased. Most of all, Raven wanted to stay with her dreams forever, where no demon could ever reach her.

She let sleep cradle her in its arms.

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJ

"Ishida?" Ichigo looked over to Uryuu, somewhat concerned, "You okay? You've been like that for a while now…." Ichigo knew the main cause of all Uryuu's stress and anti-social reasons. Though, he would never admit it, he too missed Raven very much. She reminded him of both of his younger sisters in someway and had become like family to him in the amount of time he knew her.

"Like what?" Uryuu's voice, cold and empty, cut through him like a wire at eighty miles per hour (1). Ichigo's expression became slightly more irritated, but he shook his head and left it alone. He didn't want to put his friend through anymore pain than he already was.

Uryuu sat at his desk, motionless. He had hardly talked to anyone now days. He was becoming more and more distant with each passing day, hardly replying back to anyone who asked him a question, never looking at anyone in the eyes, and his actions more distant than ever. Whenever Orihime asked him to go with her to the Handy Crafts Club, her would reject her and walk home by himself. Through his depression, Uryuu began to grow slightly thinner, though not completely unhealthy. He still at occasionally, but not like a normal high school boy should. His eyes were always seemed bloodshot complete with dark circles. He spent many sleepless nights thinking, worrying about her. Nothing compared to the ache in his chest whenever he pictured her face in his mind.

Orihime looked over at Uryuu, who was looking down at his desk and clenching his fists tightly. She looked back over to her own desk sadly. She really wished she could heal him like she could physical wounds. She almost thought it silly, knowing her powers didn't work that way. She, too, had missed Raven so deeply it almost hurt to breath. After her brother's death she had Tatsuki, but her own world began to expand and she wanted more. She only realized this when Raven appeared into her life. The emotional Quincy girl never seemed satisfied with what life gave her and, thus, influencing Orihime in some way. Orihime felt unusually close to Raven, as if she had become part of her and Tatsuki's little family. She wanted so desperately to find her friend. She almost broke down in class just thinking about it.

Though Chad and Raven didn't converse much, they had grown to some kind of understanding of each other. To him she seemed like a girl that hated to lose, wanted more from what little she had and such a caring person, even if she tried to deny the fact. She opened his eyes to a whole new world. A world where losing meant nothing and winning mean everything. A place where attempting wasn't good enough, but trying was. It felt as if the world wasn't a world, but an adventure when she was around. Sadly the world crumbled to pieces and threw its own remains into the wind, when she left. There could never be another world like it.

Ichigo sighed. Dense as he was, he could still tell everyone was having a hard time accepting the fact that Raven was no longer with them (though they refused to believe she was dead). He wanted to sulk, he wanted to throw a fit and mourn just like his friends, but he couldn't afford to. If he wanted to protect the rest of them then he couldn't afford to let himself do those things. He needed to focus on the task at hand. There was a new enemy making themselves known and he needed to take them out before they caused any real damage to everything. Aizen had been moving a lot faster than any of them had expected.

Uryuu got up from his desk, his chair making a hideous screeching sound on the floor.

"Hey," Ichigo called out to him, "Where do you think you're going? We're still in school," He watched as Uryuu packed his bags and left the classroom, not saying a word to anyone. Orihime looked out the window, watching Uryuu leave school grounds ever so calmly. She sighed and continued to sulk at her desk.

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJ

Raven sat on the edge of her Sensei's dojo peacefully enjoying a box of delicious onigiri (2); completely unaware of the scars she had left behind. She sighed with content as she finished the last one and drank down an entire bottle of water.

The entire place had such a peaceful atmosphere to it. Sakura, for some odd reason, were always in bloom near the house. The soft pink petals gently grazed her skin every so often, giving off their sweet scent. Tiny, plump birds would hop along the floor looking for worms and other insects to fill their bellies. Raven looked to the sky with lazy eyes and kept her hand on the side of her head to keep the wind from blowing her hair in her eyes.

Her gaze became hazy and blurry as if she were dreaming and for a moment Raven thought she really was dreaming as images filled her head.

Every scene was filled with people she thought she didn't recognize; places she could've sworn she'd been before. After a few images, she found something rather upsetting in them. In every single picture her mind showed her, there was always that one same person. The same person that's been in every dream, every nightmare she'd ever had since the first night in her Sensei's house. His eyes a steel-grayish-blue that pierced the soul to its core, short ebony hair as black as hers, and glasses that graced the fair skin on the bridge of his nose.

Every time she would think of him, or who he was to her, shivers would run down her spine and her body would heat up like she was thrown into a raging volcano. Her heart would beat faster when she was normal, but whenever she was having another anxiety attack and thought of him, her heart calmed immediately and all was well. She couldn't explain the feelings running threw her body. How she would feel an urge, a need to find him. At times she would even wake up to a mental image of him (which flattered him quite nicely) and her hands in the most unusual of places.

It was days before Raven's old life started to catch up to her and it only took so long for her new life to find her.

"You've been living inside a dream," Raven heard a voice in her dark room and swiftly spun around to attack whatever enemy was near her, "No need for violence. I've merely come to make a proposition with you, Jaganshi Raven,"

A man with white clothing, black hair, a strange helmet like mask on the left side of his head. His messy black hair stood out against his pale white skin almost as much as his sea green eyes.

"Who are you?" Raven narrowed her eyes and gathered a large amount of energy in her fist, just in case.

"Ulquiorra," he answered simply, "An Espada of Aizen-Sama. I've come to take you to Heceo Mundo, where you will serve Aizen-Sama,"

Raven scoffed at him, "Are you serious? Even if I knew who this 'Aizen-Sama' was I still wouldn't follow you! Give me one good reason why I should join you! I don't even like your presence! You have the reiratsu of a hallow and even have a hole in your chest! Get out before I kill you!"

"I'm afraid you don't have a choice," he lowered his head slightly to look at her in the eyes, attempting to frighten her into going. He snapped his fingers as a few regular looking hollows appeared, holding her Sensei captive. Raven's eyes grew wide with shock for a moment, but quickly went back to glaring at the Espada, "Well? You're answer, Jaganshi-san?" He glowered down at her, "If you'll come with us, we will honestly have no intention of killing or hurting your Sensei. We will leave him be as if this whole thing had never happened. However," he continued, his tone getting to a dangerous tone, "If you even so much as disobey us, he will die,"

Raven bit her lip and looked over to her Sensei. His eyes held no sign of fear in them. She doubted he could ever be afraid. He glared at her, mentally telling her not to do it. Raven however thought outside of the box he was in. She knew he was still strong for his age, but no where near strong enough to last these so called Espada. To top it off, he really was beginning to show his age in battle. She had sparred with him a few times during her stay, but had to cut the sessions short because he wore out much faster than she did.

She closed her eyes for a moment and let her arms fall limp at her sides. Raven knew when she was defeated. She nodded and allowed herself to be pulled through the portal to Heceo Mundo. Raven didn't even so much as look at her Sensei as she left with him. She didn't want to see the shame and anger in his eyes. She didn't want that to be the last thing she ever saw of him, if it really was their last time seeing each other.

Jaganshi Hizashi couldn't bare to watch his student leave. He turned his head away from her dark silhouette. He felt the hollows leave his side and his only beloved granddaughter vanish from the human world and into the darkness that was hollow.

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJ

"What did you mean," Raven asked Ulquiorra, "When you said that I was living inside a dream?" She stared at the ground as they walked the long corridors of the unfamiliar building.

"That place wasn't were you belonged," he answered, his face never showing any expression or even once looking down at her, "It kept you in a dream-like state that would've left you drifting between reality and illusions for an eternity. Such a pathetic state isn't meant for humans of your status,"

"So you'd thought you'd save me? Pfft! I find that hard to believe," her voice was cold and heartless.

"No," he sighed inwardly and explained further, "Personally I couldn't care less how careless humans spend their lives. Aizen-Sama ordered to bring you here,"

"What for? And who is this 'Aizen-Sama'?"

"You will learn," he grew rather irritated with her questions and silently thanked the fates for bringing them to the doors of Aizen's chamber so quickly.

The room was mostly dark. Raven could sense other's presence inside the room, though she could not see them. She immediately caught the presence that was irritating to all of her senses. She didn't know why, but she wanted to destroy it oh-so badly.

"So, you've come peacefully I see," The chair at the center of the room turned around to reveal a man with wavy brown locks and a cold and amused look plastered on his face.

"Who are you?" She asked wearily and almost uninterested.

"Sosuke Aizen," he replied calmly with a hint of pride in his voice, "You will follow my orders. Is that understood?"

Raven nodded slightly. She knew that the real her would've never agreed to such a thing so easily, even if her Sensei's life was at stake. She would've fought, not matter what her chances were. Jaganshi Raven definitely didn't take orders, especially from hollows.

It hit her.

She looked Aizen over a few times. This man was no hollow! He was a Shinigami! Raven couldn't make sense of it. Why would a hollow take orders from a Shinigami? Aizen must've noticed her internal struggle because he chuckled to himself and addressed her once more.

"There are many reasons why I follow and they take charge. I don't have time to explain everything to you. You will know your part in my plans soon enough. Ulquiorra will escort you to your room. Though you may not remember her, I'm sure she'll be happy enough to see you," he smirked at her confused expression.

Ulquiorra walked her down many more empty corridors and finally they arrived at her assigned room. He opened the door and inside a girl about her age whipped her head around, her long orangey-brown hair like flowing gracefully beside her. Her blue eyes looked worried, but they soon grew to a shocked expression as she saw who was standing next to Ulquiorra.

"J-Jaganshi-chan!" Orihime shouted in surprise. She quickly grew happy and ran over and hugged Raven.

"Hm? Do I know you?" Raven grew stiff at her hug and looked at her with a confused expression. Orihime pulled back, confused as well but for a different reason.

"Don't you remember me? It's me! Orihime! Inoue Orihime," Orihime looked up at her with hopeful eyes. Raven only looked back with careless ones. Ulquiorra left the room, sensing that they needed to be left alone (though he probably would've left anyway considering all he had to do was take Raven to her room).

"Umm…sorry," Raven flinched at her expression, "I don't recall. Maybe you're thinking of someone else?"

Orihime shook her head vigorously, "No, I know it's you! You went with us to Soul Society to save Rukia! You helped us with the Bount! You fell in love with Ishida Uryuu!"

Raven's expression went from confused to flat out shocked, "What?! Umm…You've got me all wrong! I don't recall ever being in Soul Society! I don't know what these 'Bount' things are. And I assure you I've never fallen in love with a man and never will! I'm just not suited to be the house wife type," She huffed and crossed her arms.

Orihime calmed down a bit and thought out loud to herself, "What happened to you? It's like you never met us at all…"

"I'm sorry there really must be some kind of misunder-"

"No!" Orihime cut her off, "I know it's you, Jaganshi-chan! I'll never forget your wonderful face! Never! You have no idea how much of an impact you've made on all of our lives! When you disappeared it was like…like the sun imploded, or the moon stopped shining at night. It felt as if there was no world left to live our lives,"

Raven looked at her with a serious expression, "You're lying," she whispered, her voice almost hoarse, "I've never been that important to anyone. When I left my mother found someone else to place her burdens upon. My father didn't care enough to find me himself. My brother hated me and killed himself because he couldn't stand me. My grandfather probably hates me by now…"

Orihime moved close to Raven and embraced her, making Raven rest in between the crook of her neck as she stroked her ponytail, "Maybe you don't remember, or believe anything I've said so far. I'll get over it soon. That way we can start over and become even better friends! I'm sure they wouldn't believe me if I ever got back and told them I saw you…"

"Them?"

"Ichigo, Chad, and …Uryuu," Orihime hesitated a bit. Raven's pulse began to speed up. She didn't understand why, but she knew, somehow, that she was telling the truth from the bottom of her heart.

"Why did you leave them?" Raven asked quietly.

"I didn't have much of a choice. They would've been killed,"

"I see. I had the same problem," Raven accepted her and embraced her back, around the waist, "I want to protect you, Ori-chan," Raven let go and smiled at her. Orihime wiped away a forming tear at the corner of her eye and giggled.

'She's just like she's always been,' Orihime thought, 'She's still our Rei-chan!'

RJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJRJ

Mori: Whooo! I'm gonna have more for you guys reaaaaaally soon! Like I said I have plenty of ideas and I need to get them down before they disappear! Right now it's a bit late for me though and if I don't go to sleep now I'll never wake up .

1: I've, personally, never seen a wire cut at 80mph, but I've already seen what wire can do to limbs (shudder)

2: Onigiri is a Japanese rice ball that is sometimes sweet and consists of different fillings.