"What I once used to dream I now dread…if he finds me, it won't ever end…" - Christine Daae, Phantom of the Opera

.........

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: HARD-KNOCK LIFE

Jack was still in denial. He'd just killed Simon the previous night. A living, human being.

She'd never forgive him now.

He didn't know why he was so worried about it. He hunted things all the time. It was no different.

Who was he trying to kid? It was completely different. And now Jessica would never talk to him again.

If Ralph hadn't been right before…he was right now. This time, Jack had really f*cked up.

The worst part was that now there was no fire. It had gone out the previous night because of the rain. The boys were getting restless.

He had to fix it.

"I'll get fire, I promise you," he told them. "Tomorrow, we'll hunt again. But we have to be careful, because the monster could come any time."

If he wanted the boys to stay with him, he needed them to have fear. Fear of the monster.

"But didn't we--" Sam began.

"I thought we--" Eric said.

"No!" he said harshly. He cleared his throat. "I mean…no, we didn't. It could come any time, in any shape. Just when we're not ready. It could be there. Waiting."

.........

"Maybe we should just build a raft and row off," Piggy suggested as twilight was settling in.

"Yeah. And then I can go jump off a cliff and die on sharp rocks," Jessica said, sitting on a fallen tree.

"I will if you will," Ralph said from beside her. "Anything's better than here."

"But we don't know what's out there," Piggy said, sitting with them.

"I'll bet you out beyond the reef, there are lots of boats that come by every day. And one could rescue us."

"Maybe I don't wanna be rescued," Jessica said bitterly. "Maybe I don't wanna do anything anymore."

Ralph started to worry. "Stix…"

"Maybe I really should jump off a cliff. It'll be better than living…without…"

She started to cry. Ralph awkwardly put his arm around her.

This was supposed to be Jack's job. He was her brother. He needed to comfort her.

But…he was the one who had killed Simon.

"Stix…we all miss him…but if you think about it…Simon wouldn't want you to kill yourself just because he's dead. He'd want you to live out your life and be happy."

"What do you know?"

"I know Simon," Piggy piped up. "And Ralph's right. He was the type of person who wanted everyone to be happy. And…I know if he were here right now, he'd hate seeing you so miserable."

"I can't take this anymore," Jessica said suddenly. "We need to make a raft right now and row to the reef. Then we'll see a ship and we'll get rescued and we'll leave all those S.O.B.s behind."

"Supposing a ship did," Piggy said. "What if it was Russian? Then what? We'd be taken prisoner."

"The Russians wouldn't take us prisoner," Ralph said. "And stop scaring her. She's…"

"I'm not a baby," Jessica said. "And I agree with Ralph. Come on, Piggy. The Russians?"

"I don't know," Piggy admitted. "Major Dingledine, the guy my aunty's dating--"

"Major Dingledine?" Ralph and Jessica asked incredulously.

"Yeah. He said that if the Russians were to invade the U.S., they would take the kids, and separate us from our parents…and I know it sounds weird…but then they would make us go into the Olympics or something."

Ralph started to laugh. The Olympics? That was ridiculous.

He noticed that Jessica had started to giggle a bit. This made him laugh even more. It was good for her to laugh like this.

"I don't see what's so funny," Piggy said sulkily.

"Piggy…I don't think you have to worry about the Russians forcing you into the Olympics."

"Yeah…come on…that is a bit ridiculous…"

All three started to laugh.

"Hey…what's that?"

Ralph and Piggy went into the ocean and pulled out something broken. When they sat back down on the log, it turned out to be a smashed-up accordion.

Ralph pretended to play it, singing horribly. The sun will come out tomorrow…bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow…there'll be sun…

"Where do you think it comes from?" Piggy wondered.

"A Russian submarine," Ralph said in mock terror. "Full of Olympic athletes."

.........

"Jessica?"

Jessica sat up to face a whimpering Piggy. "Someone's out there," he said.

"Come outside, Piggy," someone called.

Jessica groaned.

She knew who it was.

"Ralph!" Piggy said, shaking him. "Ralph!"

"What is it?" he said, a bit annoyed.

"My jackass brother's outside," Jessica said flatly. "What else?"

The shelter--for the third time in a week and a half--crashed down on them. The hunters ran away, carrying something that glinted in the moonlight.

Jessica froze when she looked at Piggy.

She knew what they'd taken.

.........

The next day, Jessica sat with Piggy as he cried. He'd been like this all morning, and she knew how it felt. Ralph gave them coconut shells filled with water.

"We did everything just the way grown-ups would've," Piggy said through his tears. "What went wrong? Why didn't it work?"

"You know very well why," Jessica said, her voice rife with hatred.

"Things would be much better if it wasn't for him," Piggy said. "I wish he was dead."

Jessica glared at him. When it came to bad-mouthing her brother, only she could say stuff like that. But if someone else did…well, they had crossed a very dangerous line and were asking for it.

"No, you don't," Ralph quickly said, seeming to notice the sudden tension.

"I do!" He was silent for a moment. "We could just give up and join his tribe. Then we'd at least be with the others."

"No way in hell am I joining Jackass's tribe." Jessica folded her arms. "I've already tried to help him. And his behavior clearly tells me he is beyond any help."

"Don't talk like that," Ralph said, upset.

"Ralph…I can't see!" Piggy wailed.

"I know, Piggy…" Ralph looked into his coconut shell. "I know."