It's been a week since that whole thing with Randy happened. How could he even think to kiss me? And what's worse was that I actually kissed him back. I don't know why, but I did. When John came back to the hotel that day I really was going to tell him about what happened the night before, but then he kept apologizing and then he told me that he loves me and I couldn't ruin the moment by telling him I kissed his bestfreind. Well technically it was the other way around, but there is still no excuse for me.

I haven't talked to Randy since that night, I don't even want to talk to him. Even though I should give Randy a chance to explain why he did what he did, but I just can't even look at him right now. I've been ignoring him ever since that night and Randy has been doing the same. Whenever we're all together hanging out at the gym, park, or any restaurant, Randy becomes so distant and quiet towards everyone that they all become so suspicious and curious to what's up with him. I hate to what's happened to Randy and I because now I feel as if our friendship is ruined.

I can't even look at John in the eye without feeling guilty about what I did. For a year John has been there for me, and he even took me in when I left my home. He's done so much for me and then I go and kiss Randy behind his back. I really hate myself right now. Mostly because this brings back so many horrible memories from when I was in high school.

It was a Sunday afternoon and we all decided to have a small picnic at the park. The wonder full smell of BBQ went through my nose and I felt as if I was in heaven. I loved having picnics, it was always so much fun. We have all been here for a while now and John wanted to take a walk with me. We went together holding hands as the sun was about to set.

John kept stroking my hand with his thumb and kept smiling and no matter what the smile was still glued to his face.

Evelyn: Why do you keep smiling?

John: Nothing it's just that I'm really happy.

He said looking at me with those amazing blue eyes of his. Guilt struck me again. There is no way John can find out about what happened that night. If John is happy then I want him to stay like that. I hate seeing him mad or upset and the worse part is that I'm the one that'll be able to make him sad in a heart beat and I hate myself for having that power. It's something I definitely don't want.

John: You know I'm really not use to this. I've never had a serious relationship with anyone before and the fact that I'm able to have a serious relationship with you makes me really happy and special. Whenever I kiss you I just get so amazed because the feeling inside me becomes so different and it feels amazing. You always know what to do to make me so happy.

Evelyn; John I don't even know how I got so lucky to be able to meet you and actually get to know you. On screen you're this guy that knows how to talk, so strong, and never backs down from any fight. But deep down inside you're so amazing and sometimes soft.

John: Evelyn you have no idea how much I love you.

John said and I just couldn't take it anymore. I really love John, I do. But the way I feel right now makes everything so much worse. If Randy hadn't kissed me that night then everything would be fine, but I just feel so guilty that I started to cry a bit.

John: Hey what's wrong?

He asked as he stepped infront on me supping my face in both of his hands.

Evelyn: Nothing.

I said trying to wipe the tears away, but they just couldn't stop forming.

John: Then why are you crying?

He asked wiping the tears that were falling down my face.

Evelyn: Nothing I just...I love you so much and I don't want to lose you.

I said putting my arms around his neck hugging him so hard that if I let go I'd fly away and lose him forever.

John: Evelyn you're not gonna lose me, never. I will never let you go.

He said holding me in his arms hugging me as he started stroking my hair. It's not only what happened between Randy and I, this just goes all the way back to my past.

/

The next morning I get a call from my mom. It's been a while since I've heard from her and I need a little mother daughter chat.

Evelyn: Hi mama.

I said so excited.

Tabitha: Evelyn wow it's so good to finally hear from you. I miss you so much.

Evelyn: I miss you too. I'm sorry I haven't called in a while it's just things have been pretty bussy the past couple of days.

Tabitha: It's ok. So when will you guys be flying back to New York? I wanna see you.

Evelyn: Um I think in about a week or two. I'm not sure yet, the schedule has been pretty confusing and the workers have to fix it.

Tabitha: Alright well when you come back you're gonna finally see the brides maid dress that Nicole has chose for everyone for her wedding.

Evelyn: Oh my G-d I can't wait. i'm so excited to go back home and visit everyone.

Tabitha: Yeah and Nicole and I can't wait to see you.

Evelyn: So how's dad?

Tabitha: Do you really wanna know?

Evelyn: Not really, but I just wanna know how he's doing.

Tabitha: He's doing good. He's still extremely upset about how you ran off that night.

Evelyn: I don't blame him, but I just had to leave.

Tabitha: I know. Evelyn you are so mature and have a great future ahead of you nothing shoulld be stopping you. Just don't become another Brittney Spears ok?

My mom was hilarious.

Evelyn: I'll make sure of that mama. I have to go right now, I'll talk to you soon. bye mom I love you.

Tabitha: I love you too Evelyn.

She said and I hung up the phone.

John: Hey who were you on the phone with?

John asked as he came out of the shower with no shirt, wiping his head with a towel.

Evelyn: My mom.

John: Really? How is she doing?

Even though John never met my mom he always asks if she's ok.

Evelyn: She's doing fine.

John: That's good. I'm glad you're at leaste getting along with you're mom.

Evelyn: Yeah me too.

I said as John went to his closet and looked for a shirt.

John: I'm gonna go to the gym for now wanna come?

Going to the gym means Randy is going to be there and I was still not ready to face him.

Evelyn: Uhh no it's ok I'm just gonna go and hang with Amy for now.

John; You sure?

Evelyn: Positive.

John: Alright I'll see you later. I love you.

He said coming up to me and giving me a kiss.

Evelyn: I love you too.

I said and he left. I got up and got dressed then headed down to Amy's room. I knocked on the door and she opened up.

Evelyn; Hey are you busy?

lita: Nope.

Evelyn: Really? Yoy don't have a match tonight?

Lita: Nope. I'm free as a bird.

Evelyn: Alright so what's up?

I asked as I plopped down on her bed.

Lita: Nothing.

Evelyn: You're still thinking about him aren't you?

Lita: Yes. Evelyn what the hell am I gonna do? I was doing so fine without him here and now that he's back makes everything extremely awkward and complicated.

Evelyn: Have you tried talking to him?

lita: I haven't even gone near him. I can't face him because if I do then i'm just gonna break down and I don't want that to happen.

Evelyn: Amy you can't always be strong. I mean being strong in the ring is different, but when it comes to your heart and how you feel, don't fight it.

Lita: Yeah you're right. I just to face my fears and tell him how I feel, but there's something I have to tell you.

Evelyn: What?

Lita: I might like someone else.

Evelyn: Who?

Lita: Adam.

She said and I went into total complete shock.

Evelyn: Adam as in Edge?

Lita: Yeah.

Evelyn: How the fuck did this happen?

Lita; Well I was really upset when Matt broke up with me and I got really drunk and Adam and I sort of hooked up and we've been secretely seeing each other hear and there.

Evelyn; Why didn't you tell me?

Lita: I didn't tell anyone. I was scared to what anyone would think. I don't want anyone to know.

Evelyn: Are you still seeing him?

Lita: The last time we've been seeing each other was when I first met you. He told me that he had feelings for me, but then I just ran off. I wasn't ready to be in another serious relationship. I mean with Adam it's so much fun to be with him, but I know that's he's not the kind of guy that want's to settle down. And I know that with Matt would some day want to have a family with me and I really love him.

Evelyn: What about Adam?

Lita: I don't know. i mean I do like him I really do, but I love Matt way more.

Evelyn; Then I guess your decision's made.

Lita: Yeah it is. Thanks E.V

Evelyn: Anytime.

I said and she gave me a hug and then we started to get ready for Raw tonight.

Lita: Help me pick out something to wear.

Evelyn: Sure.

I said as we both looked through her closet.

Evelyn: So when do you think you'll be getting the women's title back?

Lita: I'm not sure. The last time I had it was 5 months ago and that's when I lost it to Victoria. But right now I think that snoty bitch Melina has it.

Evelyn: Yeah I don't know what the hell her problem is. I once saw her backstage and she just pushed me because I was apparently in her way.

Lita: What ever I guess I'm backing off for a little while 'cause right now there's a story line between her and Trish.

Evelyn: I can't believe I'm saying this, but I really do hope that Trish wins it back.

Lita: Me too.

She said and we both started to laugh.

Evelyn: Or who knows mayne you can be the one who shuts her face up.

Lita: Oh I am just praying for that to happen. Keep your fingers crossed.

Evelyn: Will do.

[Randy's P.O.V]

That's it. I'm tired of waiting, I have to talk to her and nothing is gonna fucking stop me. I saw Amy as I was walking backstage, maybe she knew where Evelyn is.

Randy: Amy have you seen Evelyn?

Lita: Yeah she's in the bathroom.

She said and I walked down the hall looking for the girls bathroom. I waited right outside until she came out. After 5 minutes she finally came out and got startled when she saw me.

Evelyn: Randy what the fuck! You almost gave me a heart attack.

She said shoving me in the chest.

Randy: I have to talk to you.

Evelyn: We have nothing to talk about.

Randy; Yes we do, and I'm not going anywhere until we talk.

Evelyn: Fine what is so important that we have to talk about it?

Randy: Last monday and the kiss.

Evelyn: Look that kiss was a mistake and it meant nothing so just forget that it ever happened.

Randy: No it wasn't. I know I'm the one who kissed you, but you kissed me back and don't deny it.

Evelyn: Fine I kissed you back. There are you happy?

Randy: I know you felt something. I know because I felt something too. I really like you Evelyn.

Evelyn: How can you say that to me when you know I'm dating your best friend?

Randy: I know and I feel like a complete asshole for saying this, but I didn't mean for this to happen. I really do like you.

John: I'm sorry what did you just say to my girlfriend?

Fuck my life.