A/N
I am going to use the "Undercover" scenes at Sealview as her sexual assault... makes it easier and everyone knows what it is. if you don't well go watch the episode! lol great ep. so flashbacks are going to consist of bits and pieces of that. in italics.

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"No, get off me! Heellllppp! Heeelllllppp!" He started unzipping his pants. She was handcuffed against the door. He forced her head towards his protruding member. "No, no!..."

"Liv," Elliot whispered. It was 3 in the morning. "Liv," Elliot said again, this time a bit louder and shaking her arm.
"Olivia!" She finally jumped awake, almost crying in a cold sweat.

"Are you okay? You were yelling and punching in your sleep. You kept saying no, get off me." He was worried that he had triggered her nightmares again.

"Oh god. I'm sorry El. I didn't mean to wake you," she said as she relived what she had just dreamt.

"You don't ever have to be sorry for that." He kissed her cheek and wrapped his arms around her. She calmed down and just stared out the window.

He always knew how to make her feel safe. Her nightmares were returning though. This made her worried. What happened if during sex she had to tell him no because of a flashback?

She knew the only way to solve it was go back to therapy and try to resolve whatever is making her do this again. She couldn't live like this. She also knew that the nightmares might not ever go away.

She had to tell herself what every other victim needed to know, which was that you can't get rid of the attack out of memory, but you could live with it. She needed to learn how to live with it.

Olivia laid awake until 5 30 when the alarm went off. Elliot groaned. "Why can't I stay home today too?," he said in a slur.

"Because you don't have someone stalking your hot ass." She laughed.
"This is true. Alright I'm moving, I swear." He laid there with her for another minute.

"You're moving in really slow motion today, aren't you? Come on El, you gotta get up." She tried pushing him off of her, but it was no use. He was a blob.

He sighed heavily, knowing he had to get up.
"Fine." He rolled out of the bed, heading to the bathroom. "Do I have to shower by myself?"

"Hmm. I don't know. Do you?" She smirked at him, but in the back of her mind knew she couldn't go in there with him. She was still shaken up from the flashback. He could see her face and knew she didn't want to.

"Some other time Liv." He walked over to her. "Don't ever feel like you have to do anything you don't want to. Okay?" He looked at her, seeing shame and guilt in her face.

"I love you Liv." He leant down and kissed her.
"I love you too. Go, take your shower. Your gonna be late." She kissed him again.

He went to take a shower as she sat on the bed, contemplating whether or not to get up for the day. She decided since she had a day off she might try sleeping in a bit. 'At least til 8' she thought. She laid back down. She closed her eyes and tried breathing deeply to get back to sleep. It worked.

"Please don't, please don't!" She screamed as he threw her on the bed. "Get off me! Heeeellllpppp!"
"You like it rough?," he said as he threw her against the wall and started grinding into her. She felt him get hard.
"HEEELLLLLPPPP!" He threw her on the bed again, getting on top of her.

"Olivia!" Elliot shook her out of it again. She was crying.
"El, he was...there." He sat down next to her as she was sobbing. He held her and calmed her down.
"Are you sure your gonna be okay today Liv? I can call Cragen and tell him I can't get in today."

"And tell him what? Hey my girlfriend who is my partner is a baby and needs someone holding her hand?," she said angrily.

"Olivia, don't talk like that. Your so strong. Your right though. I can't tell Cragen I'm here or gonna be with you. He will catch on. If anyone finds out we're together we could lose our jobs. Your having a hard time with it, it's normal."

She just sat there, silent. He hugged her and held her. It was now 6 40. He was late for work, but he wasn't going to just leave her there alone.

"Elliot, you have to go. I'll be fine," she told him, trying to coax him to leave her alone.
"Liv, I am not going to leave you here."

"I'm fine now, I promise. I'll call you if something happens," she said to him, trying to sound convincing.

He knew she was lying. She never relies on anyone because she was hard headed and didn't want anyone taking the burden she had.

"No you won't Liv. You forget I do know when your lying. I'm a cop." He grinned.
He started talking to her, using a serious tone. "But I want you to know, I'm here for you, no matter what. I love you." He kissed her head.

She knew he meant it, knew he wasn't going to run to someone else when her problems became to much for him to handle. He was there, right now, holding her and comforting her through one of the toughest times in her life.

He was reluctant to leave, but knew she also wanted him to. When he left she just sat on the bed. She decided she should get up because if she went to sleep she might have another panic attack.

She went to the kitchen to get coffee, already made thanks to Elliot. She stepped up to the counter then felt like someone was there with her. She whipped around to see nobody. She shook it off as it being in her head. She turned back around to finish getting her coffee.

She heard his voice and froze. "Hi Olivia. Long time no see."

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This chapter I really wanted to establish and bring up Olivia's PTSD.

Anyways, who is it in the apartment? I don't know who it is yet either lol.