A/N This Chapter is bittersweet. Stick with it, it get's better by the end.

Don't own Twilight - Wish I did

Chapter 25.

BPOV

Jasper had come to pick us up from the hospital. "Hi Babe" he kissed Alice hello as she got into the car and took her seat on the passenger side.

"Hi Bella" he turned his head to face me.

"Hi" I smiled back.

"How are you?" I knew that Alice had filled him in on everything that had gone on tonight.

"I'm okay, considering" I replied.

As we drove back to their apartment I found myself crying again. I had gone through so many emotions tonight already. I had been sad, happy and then angry. I still couldn't believe that Edward had agreed to help Jake. Did he really care that little about me? Even after explaining how it made me feel, Edward was still unwilling to back down on the whole helping Jake thing. Jacob was in jail now but he was still ruining my life!

We arrived at Jasper and Alice's place. "Is there anything you need Bella?" Alice asked.

"No. I think I'm just going to go to bed. Thanks"

"Okay. Spare room is the first on the left"

I made my way into the bedroom and crawled onto the bed. I curled up into a ball and cried myself to sleep.

I woke up in a cold sweat. The sheets wet from my sweat. I hadn't even realized that I had been screaming until Alice came rushing in.

"Bella what is it?"

"I had a nightmare" I replied, feeling like a five year old.

"Do you want me to call Edward?"

"No." I replied quickly.

"Are you sure? He won't mind if that's what you're worried about" she replied softly.

"Alice, can you just leave me alone please. I'm sorry that I woke you"

"If that's what you want" she replied softly. I saw the hurt in her face due to my shutting her out. Then Alice left the room closing the door behind her.

….......................................

I woke up the next morning and heard Alice outside the room on the phone.

"Edward, I'm really worried about her. She woke up in the middle of the night having had a nightmare. She won't talk to me about it though."

Edward must be talking as Alice fell silent. "I think I should take her to see Mom. I'm worried that she might have PTSD and if we just leave her to wallow it will get a lot worse."

Another pause.

"Okay I'll speak to you later, Bye"

I quickly laid back down and closed my eyes, pretending to be asleep. I heard the door open and Alice walking across the room.

"Bella, Bella it's time for you to get up" she whispered, whilst gently shaking me.

"What?" I yawned, keeping up the charade that I had only just woken up.

"Here, I've got a glass of orange juice for you" she handed it to me. I took it and began taking small sips. "I made you some breakfast as well"

"I'm not really hungry Alice"

"Bella you need to eat something"she replied sternly.

"Can you just drop it please. Oh god" I clamped my hand over my mouth and ran to the bathroom. You'd have thought that I would be used to the morning sickness by now. I cleaned myself up and began walking back to my room. Alice stopped me.

"I'm taking you to see mine and Edward's Mom today" she began to explain.

"I have to go to work"

"I've already called and spoken to Alex, he's not expecting you to be in today."

"What did you tell him Alice?" I was upset. I didn't want everyone to know what was going on in my personal life.

"I just told him that Edward was held hostage last night, I didn't say anything about Jacob or what he tried to do to you. You need to talk to someone Bella and my Mom can help with that."

"I don't know. I'd rather just go back to bed. I'm still so tired."

She put her hand on my shoulder "I know you just want to go to sleep but I need you to do this for me. For Edward"

"Why should I do anything for Edward? He's not going to stop helping Jacob even after I explained how it made me feel" I cried.

"I know and I'm sure if Edward is still helping Jacob after you expressed your feelings then I'm sure he must have a valid reason for doing it. Bella, if you won't do it for me or for Edward do it for the baby."

"Okay, okay I'll go if it will get you off my back" It was only the next day, I was allowed to feel a bit out of sorts after everything that happened to me last night, wasn't I? I couldn't see why they were making such a big deal out of it all.

I had a quick shower, my tears running down the drain along with the hot water. I got dressed, wearing Alice's jeans and a top that she had loaned me. I scraped my hair back into a bun and Alice drove me to her parents house.

We arrived at the house half an hour later, Esme opened the door. "Hello sweetheart" she greeted Alice, giving her a kiss on the cheek. "Bella, how are you?" she asked, as I stepped through the front door.

"Okay I guess" I said, shrugging my shoulders.

"Hi Dad" Alice hollered down the hallway. Carlisle was in the kitchen.

"Hi Alice, Bella" he was soft spoken. "I'm going to work. Do you want a lift to the firehouse Alice?"

"No thanks. I've got the car"

"You sure? I thought you might want to loan your car to Bella so that she can drive back later"

"Dad, you know that nobody is allowed to drive the Porsche."

"Alice" he said tersely.

"It's fine Carlisle I can get the El back" I quickly explained.

"Bye" he kissed his wife goodbye. "It was nice seeing you again Bella. Come on trouble it's time that you were going off to work as well" he took Alice with him.

Carlisle and Alice pulled out of the driveway, leaving just Esme and I.

"Why don't you take a seat in the living room sweetie" she said, gesturing me to go inside. "Is there anything you want to eat or drink?"

"Umm no. I'm okay thanks." I took a seat on the couch.

"I'll just go get us some coffee and cookies, just in case you change your mind" She floated out to the kitchen.

A few moments later she came back in with a plate and two mugs, she rested them on the coffee table in front of me.

"Bella, do you know why you're here?" she asked.

"Because Alice and Edward seem to be worried that I have a problem."

"You don't feel that there is a problem?"

"No, I mean I don't think it's a problem that I'm a little upset after everything that went on"

"Of course it isn't, sweetie. Maybe Alice and Edward are being overcautious, it's because they love you and care about you."

The room went silent as Esme and I just sat there. I shouldn't have agreed to come here, the silence between us was uncomfortable.

"Alice told me that you had a nightmare, do you want to talk about it with me?" As she asked these questions she maintained eye contact with me.

"Not really, I don't think there's much to tell."

"Okay, but if you change your mind I'm here for you to talk to."

"Thanks, Esme" I smiled. I was being polite.

"Why did you stay at Alice and Jasper's last night Bella?"

"Edward is going to help Jacob"

"And this upsets you?"

"Yeah, it upsets me. I just don't understand how Edward can help somebody who tried to kill him?"

"Did you express this to Edward?"

"Yes and he still won't back down. He's still planning on helping Jacob"

"But that's his prerogative Bella. If he is happy to forgive Jacob for hurting him, why aren't you able to get past this?"

"Didn't anyone tell you what happened?"

She looked confused "Tell me what?" she asked.

I felt the tears forming in my eyes "Jacob didn't just hurt Edward last night" I began.

Esme leaned over and took hold of my hand. "It's okay Bella. You can tell me, take all the time you need"

After a few more moments I finally whispered "Jacob tried to rape me. He probably would have succeeded had Edward not come home" the tears rolled down my cheek in a steady stream.

"Oh honey" she wrapped her arms around me, pulling me into a motherly hug. I broke down into uncontrollable sobs as it all came flooding back to me. Esme started to cry as well as she lovingly stroked my hair that cascaded down my back.

I hadn't had a mother and daughter moment like this since my Mom had died five years ago. She died suddenly after being involved in a tragic accident. Ironically it had been Jake who had been there for me. He knew me well enough to know sometimes I didn't want to talk I just needed somebody to sit next to me and hold my hand.

"I'm scared Esme"

"Scared of what honey?" she asked, wiping away my tears.

"I'm pregnant and I'm scared that I'm going to mess this kid up." I cried out.

"Why would you think that?" she cried. I'm not sure if they were tears of sorrow or joy, I couldn't really tell.

"Because everyone I love either dies or gets hurt"

"I'm sure that isn't true"

"My Mom died, Jacob became an alcoholic, Edward was almost killed last night"

"Oh Bella, none of that is your fault" she said brushing a strand of hair out of my face. "Have you told Edward any of this?"

"No" I admitted.

"I think he needs to know. I'm going to call him and ask him to pop by"

Esme went off into the other room to call Edward whilst I took a cookie from the plate and began nibbling away at it. Alice had been right I had to eat. It wasn't just me I had to take care of, but the life that was growing inside of me as well.

"Edward's on his way over" Esme said, walking back into the living room.

"Isn't he working today?"

"Yes, but he's finishing early. Edward knows this is important."

"Who's birthday?" I asked, pointing to a gift that was stashed in the corner of the room. I was trying my best to lighten the mood.

"Edward's" Esme chuckled.

"When is it?" I asked, a little embarrassed that I didn't know that his birthday was coming up. I was shocked that Alice hadn't mentioned anything to me, she loved any excuse to shop!

"Next Saturday, June 20th. Didn't he tell you?"

"No, I guess with everything that's been going on it slipped his mind"

"Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that he hates his birthday" Esme smiled, before taking a sip out of her fresh mug of coffee.

Esme made us some lunch. It was a late lunch, being that it was already two o'clock. As we ate we talked about Alice and Jasper's wedding. We had just finished eating when I heard a car pull up outside.

Esme went to answer the door whilst I remained seated. As I listened to them saying hello to one another I started to get nervous.

"Hi Bella" he said softly as he walked into the room.

"Edward, you should go sit next to Bella" Esme said.

He approached me cautiously "Is that okay?" he asked.

"Yeah sure" I hated that he felt the need to walk on eggshells around me.

"Hi" he whispered as he brushed his lips over my cheek.

"Hi" I replied, my voice barely audible even to myself. He grabbed hold of my hand and our fingers interlocked.

"Edward, I asked you to come over here because Bella and I have been talking, there are some issues I feel the two of you need to discuss" Edward squeezed my hand a little tighter, letting me know that he was here for me.

The three of us sat there and talked for the next half hour about the various issues that I had raised with Esme this morning. I told Edward everything, about how I was scared about screwing our child's life up. I saw tears pooling in his eyes as he listened to everything I had to say.

We came back to my biggest issue at the moment. Edward willingly helping Jacob.

Edward used his free hand to run through his hair, a nervous habit he had "I don't know, maybe I could ask someone else to help Jake get over his drinking problem. I can't not help him. Bella if you had seen him up on that roof." Edward turned to face me, compassion in his eyes. I started to appreciate how much this was tearing him up inside. On the one hand he didn't want to hurt me by giving Jake the help he needed on the other he couldn't just abandon someone who had asked for his help. Edward's generosity and compassion was one of the many things I loved about him.

"I guess that would make me feel a bit better" I replied. I didn't want us to be like this, I wished that I could turn back the clock and that things were like they had been before Edward went to Boston.

"Edward I don't want to feel like this" I cried.

"Bella, I'm going to help you through this" he said, pulling me close to him and wrapping his arm around my shoulder. I sobbed quietly into his chest.

Ten minutes later I heard Edward ask Esme if she could give us some privacy.

"Bella" I lifted my head up so that I was looking at him, he wiped the tears away from my face with his thumb. "Do you remember me telling you that I had a gift for you?" he asked, his voice barely more than a whisper.

"Yes" I replied.

He took a box from his jacket pocket and handed it to me. "Open it" he said.

I opened the box, I placed my hand on my chest "Edward it's beautiful" I said. I carefully pulled the bracelet from the box. It was white gold, encrusted with diamonds.

"Read the inscription" he whispered.

It read 'If I live a thousand lifetimes, you will still be my one, my only, my true love' I began to cry again, only this time they were tears of joy.

"Here, let me put it on" he said, taking the bracelet from my hand and placing it on my wrist.

"I love you" I said, then I threw my arms around his neck and pulled his face close to mine and placed a soft, tender, lingering kiss on his lips.

"Are you coming home with me tonight?" Edward asked softly.

"Yes" I replied. "Can we go now?"

"Of course"

I said goodbye to Esme. "Thank you so much for everything" I said as I hugged her.

"That's okay sweetie. I want you to know that I'm here if you ever need to talk"

"Bella, I just need to speak to Mom for a few minutes, why don't you go out to the car" Edward said, handing me his keys. I waved bye to Esme and left the house.

….............................................

That night I fell asleep in Edward's arms. He had wrapped his arms around me in a way that meant his hand was resting on my stomach. I thought of the baby growing inside me as a creation of mine and Edward's love and smiled. I knew that I would need to go and see Esme a few more times but I was determined to get better for me and for my family. I was so lucky to be surrounded by so many people who cared for me.

A/N Thanks for all the reviews, keep them coming. I do take into consideration any suggestions made. The next couple of chapters should be happier :) I will put a link on my profile for the bracelet that Edward gave Bella.