Chapter Twentyfour
"That full moon is a pearl that I can no longer reach
I can only watch you from afar
Feeling the flow and ebb of the waves of my feeling"
~ (満月は夜空の真珠)
The battle between the Heike and the Genji would soon end and the result was already obvious. Kiyomori had briefly changed the tide due to being an onryuu, as well as being the bearer of the one who held the gekirin of kokuryuu- which was what caused kokuryuu to disappear.
"Give him back to me! Give him back to me!" Saku was screaming and if it wasn't for Nozomi, she would have run to Kiyomori with the intention of snatching it back.
Kiyomori merely laughed at this. After all, who was Saku to him?
"So this is the Heike's secret." Hinoe said thoughtfully, while Atsumori looked down in guilt.
"…it is time for the dead to return to the kingdom of the departed." The speaker was Kagetoki, but his voice was in a tone that they had never heard before. All of a sudden, the others, even Saku, wonder whether they actually truly knew him.
"…aniue…" Saku whispered, temporarily distracted.
"How often have I and the Hōjō family been called a traitor." Kagetoki continued in that same voice, feeling a deep anger that seemed to be completely alien to him. "Yet I doubt that this would have been returned had we begged before this betrayal. For the first time…brief as it will be, I do not feel guilty at where I am."
This being destroyed his precious sister's happiness.
"The Heike's era is over." Kagetoki said firmly.
Kiyomori was defeated and the onryuu was purififed. However, the infamous Shigemori was still alive. Likewise, Tomomori was still alive. However, they decided that a slight rest would be allowed before they plan for the final battle, which would take place at the sea.
"I can't believe how different Kagetoki-san was." Nozomi was whispering to Yuzuru. "I was actually a bit scared."
"That is true." Yuzuru agreed, but he suddenly recalled how he had once seen a very different Kagetoki. However, that was different from this time too.
The moment that Kiyomori was defeated, Saku had grabbed onto the gekirin. Unfortunately, Kiyomori had used up all of the powers and even Hakuryuu said that he was uncertain about what would happen, only that a slight essence was there. He could either be freed or nourished. Yet the second bit might not be an option. The first would definitely restore the being, but it would be a completely new one.
At this, Saku shut herself in a room and declared that she wished to think.
"Saku, can I enter? I wish to talk to you." Kagetoki said. However, he actually did not wait for permission. "I know this is bad, but it is really important."
Much to Saku's surprise, her brother actually casted a barrier to prevent anyone from over hearing their conversation.
"What I say is very important and it must be a secret, not even Nozomi-chan can know." Upon this, he took out a thing that looked very similar to the gekirin. "This is a crystal that I changed with my illusions. I want you to hide the real gekirin and then pretend that this is the real thing and then break it."
"Aniue, I do not really understand…" she began, but he did not even let her finish speaking.
"That thing had been very powerful and I wouldn't be surprised if others want it do, especially those in power." Kagetoki said. "Therefore, if you don't do this then someone might take it from you. I don't know if this plan will work, but it is the only thing that I can think of right now."
"I understand. But aniue, not even Nozomi- "
Once again, she was interrupted and this was a clear indication.
"No one, Saku, no one. Not Nozomi-chan or hakuryuu, not even hahaue." He said very firmly. "Saku…make sure that you create a scene. Make sure that people know that you broke it."
This was because it was like one of the three sacred artefacts- it ought to be handed back to Yoritomo. Right now, they managed to find the sword and the broken mirror from Kiyomori.
Kagetoki thought that Kurou would definitely know what he ought to do with the two holy artefacts. At the very least, Benkei would definitely know. That was why he allowed himself to devote all of his attention to this problem. (1)
"Saku, despite everything that happened and everything that would happen, I truly wish for you to be happy…especially in regard to this matter."
He would like to rest a bit longer but there was still much that he had to do. Some to do with others, as well as preparations for what that should not be done.
The final battle would take place at the sea and this was a great disadvantage for the Genji. Even though Hinoe's presence did help as he was very knowledgeable in what he was involved in, this was all. Kumano remained neutral so Hinoe was there without any additional resources.
After all, he was only there as Hinoe, not as Fujiwara no Tanzo.
"At our current situation…" Kagetoki began grimly. "Our chances of winning are less then half. The Heike still have a substantial resource and unlike us, they are much used to naval warfare."
"There is also the tide- the day would start with the Heike in advantage." Hinoe supplied.
Kagetoki allowed the discussion to continue on a bit longer as he was not even willing to say the plan that should work quite well. This seemed to be another reminder of how he failed to be a proper bushi.
When he began to speak, he could hear the words from a decade ago. The words that had merely been an ordinary debate between two young boys would become real- with death being the consequences.
"It is not proper at all." Kunihira had said upon hearing his plan. "Kagetoki, you never shoot the rowers."
"But what if I am really outnumbered? Surely the prudent thing will be going along with my plan." Not the exact situation that they were in, but they were severally disadvantaged due to the lack of knowledge and skill to fight in such a battle.
"But if you win, everyone will say that you should not win." Yes, people would definitely say that. In fact, he could already hear those words.
"Yes, but it will not change the fact that I won and that my people are alive." Was everyone not the same? What you gain was often via another person's lose. What Kiyomori did to Saku was really the very same.
What had Kunihira said when they ended their conversation? When he said that he would never be in such a position- the position that he was in right now.
"I think I am glad of that. I think you'll be a really ruthless commander. Doing all that you can to win."
That was a very god description of what he has become- he has killed in order to continue living.
The sigh should have been hidden, but he was unable to do so. This then caused the others to focus on him again.
"It is true that this might work." Hinoe admitted with a frown. "But it will certainly earn many condemnations."
"As you said yourself, upon the attack in Fukuhara, the Genji winning is the most important thing." Kagetoki defended before he admitted very sincerely: "If anyone could come up with a better plan then I would be very happy to use it."
"It will work…" Kurou admitted, but he then yelled out: "However, this is breaching too much protocol!" (2)
"Yet this seems to be the best plan." Benkei admitted, and Kagetoki almost sighed a second time. He actually betted his hope on Benkei- that the strategist could come up with a better idea then this.
"I don't really care about what would be said since I am not involved. However, this would affect the Genji greatly." Hinoe said simply.
"Let it be known that this is my plan." Kagetoki said without any hesitation. "That should be enough."
Condemnation would appear and it would easily be attached onto his name. After all, he has already done much to earn it.
"I have to make my way back to Kamakura as Yoritomo-sama and Masako-sama would both be present at the battle, and I will be accompanying them. We should arrive right on time for the battle." Kagetoki announced when the meeting was finally finished.
"Aniue is going to be there, is that wise?" Kurou asked in concern.
"Yoritomo-sama decided that he would be there." Kagetoki said. "But since I am going back to Kamakura, I will take the two sacred artefacts back."
"I have already sent it back to Goshikawa-houou." Kurou stated. "I thought that it ought to be returned as soon as it could."
For a brief moment, Kagetoki almost wonder whether it was his paranoia that was causing him to mishear things. Surely this would not be happening…
"As soon as you could…as soon as the battle finished?" maybe if he hurried, then he would be able to catch up with the messenger. This would be an interference that he would be pardoned for, because getting the two artefacts back was most important. In addition, both Yoritomo and Masako would definitely be in a better mood if the artefacts were not lost.
However, the distance seemed to be impossible.
"Kagetoki, what is wrong with you?" Kurou began. "Do you think that I shouldn't have sent it back immediately?"
The answer in Kagetoki's head was 'You shouldn't have sent it at all!'. One would either take it themselves, or gave it to their master. What Kurou did was much too dangerous.
"No, I don't think it would matter that much." This was not a lie, but it was not really the answer to the question that they were thinking of. The reason that he said this was because he felt that this would not have a major impact on his master's soon to be decision. After all, this would merely be one of the thing, not the only thing.
"I am leaving as soon as the sun rises, so I am going to rest now." he ought to despise himself for being able to sound so cheerful despite that this might be the very last time such a thing would happen.
But maybe things would not be that bad…
Throughout the meeting, Yuzuru had been very quiet. Only speaking now and then. it was partly because he knew that he had little right to interfere in all this as he was just a student in senior high school. In addition, his main concern was Nozomi. (3)
However, he was observing everything very carefully.
Upon hearing the plan from Kagetoki, he was very surprised. It was because that this very practical plan (to one who came from the twenty first century) was meant to have come from Kurou, not Kagetoki. In fact, Kagetoki was meant to have protested about how unconventional it was.
But then, history was clearly different. There was no guarantee that what happened there would happen here either.
"Yuzuru." It was Hakuryuu and unlike most of the time, the god actually looked very regal. This was one of the times when one felt that they had little choice but to obey.
"I am very concerned with Kagetoki." Hakuryuu stated. "Even though he is smiling, this is merely a mask to hide his tears." (4)
"Kagetoki-san…" Yuzuru was not as certain as Hakuryuu but there many times when elder man made him feel that he was not what he appeared as.
It was not hypocritical in the sense of being deliberate, but Yuzuru felt that Kagetoki did have a rather different side that was usually hidden. However, the problem was that what this secret side was like was not very clear
"But it will be alright if Yuzuru-kun helps him because you two are the two co-existing sides of Byako." Hakuryuu added.
It was true that Yuzuru's main concern was Nozomi, but he would like to help Kagetoki too. Therefore, he found himself walking to the stables as Kagetoki would probably be there.
"Yuzuru-kun, you ought to be resting." Kagetoki immediately said before he suddenly laughed. "I am sorry, Yuzuru-kun, I seemed to have the habit of telling Saku to do so for much too long."
"Kagetoki-san is a bit like an elder brother to both senpai and I. You are much elder then us and you do look after us now and then." Yuzuru said thoughtfully. "But shouldn't you be resting as well?"
"I will, but I have to get my horse ready. After all, a horse is very important to a bushi." He said simply.
He was actually feeling a bit emotional at what Yuzuru said about him being like an elder brother. However, he then quickly reproved himself for this- being related to him was actually quite a bad thing. Therefore, he quickly tried to prevent this topic from growing by creating a new topic.
"How a bushi's horse looks like would affect a bushi." He began. "However, I used to be quite lazy by failing to after the horses in my house. Once, I had to see my master and none of the horses were presentable and I could not find any of the brushes. Therefore, I grabbed the first comb that I saw. Unfortunately, this turned out to be my wife's and it actually caused a great misunderstanding due to me putting it back without telling her."
Tamako was to find hair of an unusual shade on her comb that did not match with any one in the house. She loved her husband and trusted him but still worried like anyone in love would.
"Yes, I used it to brush someone else's hair." Unfortunately, his choice of words was affected by her question. "You are not angry, are you?"
"Why were you brushing their hair for them?" she continued, clearly demanding an answer.
"Because it was in a mess and so I had to do it." He answered, still not realising why she was creating such a bit fuss about it.
"It was someone quite young, right?" she was almost pleading. "Or someone quite old."
The horse he rode was in neither category, so the negative was given.
"I don't like it." She admitted when he asked her about her strange behaviour. "If it is not a child or an elderly person, then it must be a woman. I know that nothing would happen but still…I don't like the thought of you brushing someone else's hair."
He stared at her for a very long before he suddenly laughed. Without saying anything else, he took her by the hand and led her to that very horse.
"But that was quite sometime ago." Kagetoki said with a smile. "Afterwards, I made sure that I would at least have one horse ready."
"Was it this horse?" Yuzuru asked- finding that he could not change this cheerful mood yet. Perhaps he did not wish to.
"No, not Surusumi. It is impossible for it to be Surusumi- he was given to me by Yoritomo-sama and I divorced Tamako when I began to work for Yoritomo-sama."
"Why?" Yuzuru asked again, and the answer did not change. However, Yuzuru actually pressed on. "Is working for Yoritomo-san so important that you would give up Tamako-san?"
Once again, Kagetoki could hear the accusations of that he was a dog who obeyed Yoritomo's every demand. Despite everything, he suddenly felt very tired. It was such a heavy burden.
Did he tell the young man in the hope that the other would not regard him as that bad and weak a person? Was that why he only told him a part of it? Was it only fear and an inability of trust that prevented him from revealing everything?
But why say anything then?
"When people get old, they seem to have a tendency of talking to themselves out aloud." He began. "Yuzuru-kun, you did not hear any of this, alright?"
At the assurance of secrecy, Kagetoki continued: "The truth is that I was actually spared by Yoritomo-sama and Masako-sama in that battle. They captured me and if it was not for them, then Tokimasa-dono would definitely have killed me, or they would. What I had was the choice of being a servant or dying, and I wished to live."
"Is that why you are working for Yoritomo-san?" Yuzuru was very surprised at this because not only was it a complete shock, it was very different from history.
"Partly." Kagetoki said. "But Yoritomo-sama is a great man. He could be a very great leader and ruler."
The only problem was that Yoritomo thought that others could be as rational as him. If Yoritomo was in Kagetoki's situation, then he would not be bothered at all.
"Before, who you are would determine your future. If you belong to the Hesihi then you must submit to Kiyomori-dono's decision. Likewise, being elsewhere in another family is pretty much the same. However, Yoritomo-sama is different. He would let one's abilities and skills judge ones position. I really think that he could be a good ruler." What Kagetoki said was the truth that he realised for quite sometimes, yet he still appeared very grim. "But this can be bad too…Yuzuru-kun, I am talking to myself again as I ought to never think of such a thing in the first place, let along tell it to another. However, a good leader is often someone who thinks of the people instead of just one person." (5)
This was actually a clear warning: therefore, he would destroy a useful tool once it has become too dangerous despite all that it has done for him. Therefore, he would ignore a person's individual feeling, as what they cause might be much more important.
After all, he was the leader who chose to be in that position.
"The moon is full again." Kagetoki suddenly said. "Perhaps I ought to stay indoors on such a night as it could be very dangerous. However…I have been thinking too much due to everything."
"But hopefully, the whole war would be over." Yuzuru said optimistically.
"Hopefully…I have been thinking about what happened and I realised that it is always the same. It is all due to human nature being selfish. Kiyomori-dono used the gekirin and he did not care at the pain it caused Saku since what would happen to his family was much more important. I am exactly the same- except that with me, Saku is much more important to me so I won't care about what would happen to the Heike. Kurou and you are all the same as well."
There was a scale and as you do something, you will weigh it and the heavier side is what is more important to you, so you are willing to sacrifice what was on the other side.
Everyone does this everyday, the only exception was that their actions differed.
At this, Kagetoki looked down at his hands again and thought of the various things that he did. He was willing to even kill in order to preserve what was important to him. There were times when the scales were not as one sided, but the result would always be the same. His family would always be there and they would always be more important.
However, the scale was balanced rather evenly this time as the side that competed was Kurou and the rest. Companions…if not friends.
Yet the result would always be the same.
"Yuzuru-kun, have you worked out what is the most important thing to you?" he suddenly asked, although he indicated that the other did not have to answer. "For me, it is my family. My mother and my sister."
They were the ones who would always outbalance everything.
"But Kagetoki-san, what about Tamako-san?"
"Tamako is in a different situation." He said simply.
She was safe as she was no longer on the scale. She would not need to be protected by him. A good thing as he was not able to do so.
Yoritomo's decision did not really surprise Kagetoki and he has already decided that Yoritomo was his master. Therefore, he would do this despicable act.
He was sure that Yoritomo would be able to be a good ruler, but it was just like what he said to Yuzuru. A good ruler was not good to everyone. The people in this country would be able to have a pleasant life, but many others would first die in order for this to come true.
Some of those deaths would be ordered by Yoritomo.
Was Yoritomo disposing Kurou the moment he no longer needed the other? Or has the battle merely delayed things? Or would it have been better if Kuruo never appeared to help his brother?
They would not set off until the next morning, so Kagetoki was allowed to spend this last night in his own home.
Instead of resting in his room, he found himself in the empty room once again. The room seemed to have remained completely empty even though this was very strange. It was not even the spare room as this room was not used at all.
He was sitting at the porch outside the room, which the two of them often sat. As he raised his head to look at the moon, he saw that it still remained full.
What was she doing in Hiraizumi? If Yoritomo was completely right, and Kagetoki had little doubt about this, then Hiraizumi's current peace would soon be disrupted.
However, she should be safe…at the very least, she would be safer there instead of here.
"Kagetoki, you should be resting." His mother said rather reproachfully. She did not sit down with him, but she did stand at a place where she was able to see his face.
"The war between the Genji and the Heike will be over soon." She said softly. "But would war really be over?"
"There will still be much work to do, but…" At this, he decided to not lie. "It will be over, but it will not immediately be over."
"And I see that the same can be said of you and Saku." The mother said thoughtfully. "Saku made her decision long ago, but you are not like your sister."
"So she often says." Kagetoki said lightly, but his mother did not allow him to change the subject.
"What is it that you want, Kagetoki? What is it that you truly want? I think you never once do what you trust wanted as something would always prevent you. Lately, I think I am starting to realise what it actually is."
"What are you talking about, hahaue?" despite the attempt of laughing, the mother would tell that not only was her son pretending, he was actually nervous.
"I would like you to be able to do what you wish." She declared out firmly. "I would like you to make a choice without thinking about who it would affect."
She suspected that he made his important choices based on what would happen to others, not himself.
"I wish that you can be happy by doing what you wish." She whispered.
She recalled how the boy had practiced with the wooden sword in their garden with such a look of reluctance. However, he would quickly smile if he thought or noticed that someone was watching. Hit was true that he could have tried much harder, but it was something that he only did because he had to.
Then when they made him come back from his study of Onmyōdō…she only discovered how reluctant he had been about this when she accidentally overheard a conversation between her son and daughter-in-law.
As for the divorce, she suspected that there were other reasons behind his decision.
"…at the very least, I wish for you to only remarry when you wish to." Perhaps her late husband would be very angry given that Kagetoki was their only son, but she was not sorry about this decision.
However, she was not sure if he would do so. Because he knew that he was the one responsible for continuing the family, he might still do so and smile as he says that he does not mind.
When did his smile become like that? When did his smile became a lie, a pretence?
Notes:
(1) Well, in regard to what happened to Kurou in his route, I really blame Benkei the most. I can understand why some others would not do anything, but I cannot understand why Benkei would not realise how dangerous it would be from Kurou. In addition, this is his job so I feel that Kagetoki is justified by saying that he felt Benkei would know.
(2) This is quite strange but I feel that in this aspect, the role of Kurou and Kagetoki are actually reversed in the game. It seems that Kurou is very honourable (in Kagetoki's route he was really upset when Kagetoki suggested a retreat) and he seems extremely honourable. Yet it is ironic as the real Yoshitsune is said to be really capable due to his break of rules, and the real Kagetoki had been unhappy about it. However, in the game, it seems that it is Kagetoki who would be willing to do these things.
(3) Initially, I was actually quite surprised at why Yuzuru spoke so little at certain times, when he would actually know the history quite well. But however, it makes sense. In addition to the fact that he can be quite selfish by being too devoted to Nozomi, he is not presumptuous. He knows that he is only a high school student. Therefore, he probably feels that he does not have the right to interfere so openly. In addition, now that I think about it, I really feel that it is sensei and Benkei's fault for what happened to Kurou in his route. When he accepted the position and ended up being killed by Yoritmo.
The PC and Saku: I feel that they both do not realise what the current situation. In addition, the PC has no knowledge about history, as she did not even know who Kurou was.
Masaomi: he was not there
Kurou: obviously he did not realise it, as he did not realise that he was doing anything wrong at all
Hinoe: I think he actually did not realise what type of man Yoritomo is, that this action would have angered Yoritomo. Because in the attack against Fukuhara, he actually thought that it was quite strange how Kagetoki was saying that they ought to ask for Yoritomo's approval first. I feel that despite Hinoe being quite worldly and all that, he still have much to learn. I feel he is still too young and it is the idea that he has a lot of theory, but not enough practice. In his own route, what happened after that battle seemed to be a wake up call for him.
Yuzuru: Yuzuru probably knows, but I think he felt that history is quite different. After all, look at Benkei. Then there is Kagetoki. The person who is said to be a traitor for Yoritomo by snitching on Kurou due to disliking Kurou actually is really nice to them. He even seems to like Kurou. Therefore, Yuzuru would not be wrong to think that Kagetoki would not do so. In addition, Yuzuru might have thought that if Benkei and the others are fine with it, then it probably really is okay.
Atsumori: I don't think Atsumori actually knows what is going on, and even if he did, he probably feels that his position prevents him from doing anything.
Kagetoki: obviously, Kagetoki knows what happened and when we actually see him looking quite worried upon finding out that Kurou did this. It is true that he might have been able to change this if he actually talked to Kurou about it. However, I can understand why he did not do anything. After all, Kagetoki's first priority is making sure that Yoritomo will not be angry with him, so that he would not endanger his family. It does make sense as well. After all, Kagetoki out of all people knows about how paranoid Yoritomo is. Therefore, he probably feels (quite rightly) that if he warns Kurou about what is happening, then he and his family might be in danger. Yoritomo might think that Kagetoki is thinking about betraying him.
Sensei: I really blame sensei as well, because all sensei have to say is: "Kurou, you should not do this" and Kurou would not have done this. Besides, it seems that he had the Gekirin and actually saw what happened.
Benkei: I feel that Benkei is the other culprit because he should have realised this.
(4) In that OVA, Hakuryuu actually said a very similar thing in regard to Kagetoki. He actually said something about how Kagetoki has a bright smile, but he is actually crying inside. However, he then says that Yuzuru would be able to help Kagetoki. I have to say…and this might be the influence of reverse gender fan fictions. If Yuzuru was a girl then I would definitely pair her up with Kagetoki.
(5) I really feel that this is so. I really think that if Yoritomo did not threaten Kagetoki like that, Kagetoki would have thought that Yoritomo is a very great man.