As of this writing today, Festivale is approximately four days from being upon us. It's a bit different than what it was in City Folk, and it's probably the next big holiday until April Fools and Easter, the former which has been given a gracious upgrade in New Leaf.

TheFrigginShogun: I take zero responsibility for the things that you do.

If there's one thing that makes my dick twitch more than it already does now by reading the reviews on this story, it's reading even more reviews. Please, even if you don't like to review, just hearing from a reader who enjoys what their skimming at will genuinely make my day, even just a favorite is acceptable too. Thanks in advance for your courtesy.

Word Count: 945 words.

Req .25: Opal's Cue

The mayor knocks on the elephant's front door as unceremoniously as possible. His expression is non-existent, he stands in front of her door with the dullest gleam an emotionless husk can emit.

He yawns, running a hand through his scraggly hair. A clipboard is in his hands, and a pencil is resting behind his ear. On top of that, the amorous glories of customization have also blessed him with the awkward beauties of both extremely dorky glasses, and a bandage resting upon his nose.

He has no sinuses whatsoever.

Finally, Opal arrives at the door to open it after spending an eternity's worth of time acknowledging the door and reiterating how she's coming to answer it.

Honestly, the mayor has but few things on his mind when he thinks of the word coming, and knocks on the door are not one of them.

"Oh, hello Mr. Mayor, snoot! How can I help you today, snoot?"

The elephant toots her trunk and leans on the door frame before the mayor brushes her aside, his intentions clear and blunt, "Two things. First off, the good news. I'm here to return the requests you sent the other day. The Fire Hydrant, Water Pump, and Drinking Fountain have all been approved and construction will be taking place shortly. Consider yourself a lucky little fuck, that's the first time I've ever actually gotten a request that benefits the town. We're lacking in water sources, y'know."

Opal's eyes instantly light up, "Ooh! They all got approved!? Snoot, snoot, this is wonderful, snoot! I can't wait to spray water out of my trunk again just like the good old days!- Oh my, sorry mayor! What else did you want to talk about?"

The mayor adjusts his intentionally stupid glasses, "Official House Inspection-OHI if you will. I'm going to be taking a quick look at your home to see if it's stable, satisfies my expectations, and I don't fucking know, some other stupid shit I feel like snooping through."

The mayor tries to ignore the giant feathery headdress that Opal has on, as well as the immense amount of candy lying on her dining room table.

As he rounds up his not-so subtle attempt at snuffing out the fruits of his denizens, Opal gasps, "Whoa, mayor! I didn't know you did house inspections!" exclaims the elephant, her dialogue programming unable to comprehend the raunchier parts of his speech.

"I don't." he bluntly admits.

It's worth noting by this point that there aren't papers of any sort loaded on the mayor's clipboard, and the pencil in his ear is just a novelty prop, it's not even an actual pencil.

The glasses aren't really prescription either.

"Oh boy, oh boy, snoot! I can't wait to see if I pass your inspection, mayor! You don't need to worry about my house one bit, I always make sure to keep in tip-top shape!"

The mayor merely sticks his farce pencil in his mouth and stares at his empty clipboard with a grimace, "Hmm, we'll just see about that."

Thus, Opal can only watch with elevating tension as the mayor completely frisks the entirety of her estate upside-down three times over. Not one room in her home is left un-scoured, and not a single piece of furniture is left un-inspected.

Though the mayor does come across a handful of items that come across as strikingly suspicious given the elephant's expected bells on hand. However, he doesn't question about it. It's not that it's illegal, no, that's not the problem.

They're harbingers for envy.

'How the hell can she afford a crown?'

"Something wrong, snoot?"

"Oh no, nothing at all."

He combs through her living room.

He examines each of her kitchen appliances thoroughly (or as thoroughly as a lethargic douche like him could possibly get.)

He rummages her bedroom and all of the personal belongings inside of it.

He scavenges her bathroom for anything that could be considered suspicious or in need of deeper investigation, but unfortunately finds nothing beyond a few elephant-authorized bloodied tampons in the waste bin.

'Legal. Gross as shit, but legal.'

When he finds nothing that could possibly condemn Opal as being the absolute lowest scum of Dicktown and everywhere in-between, he sighs and drops his enigmatic search.

"Alright, you're clean. Get back to whatever you're doing." the mayor declares with a scowl. His faux pencil once again finds its way behind his ear, and his clipboard now rests in the clamp of his underarm.

The snooty elephant gleams with musical notes emitting from her head, glad to have passed the mayor's snoop-fest, "Oh goodie, goodie, snoot! I can't believe it!...Um, just out of curiosity, snoot, is there anything I get as a reward? I mean, passing one of your inspections has got to be a reward-worthy feat and-"

"Goodbye, Opal."

Without another word or thought, the mayor shuts Opal's hopes of an award off with a hasty, uncaring goodbye before setting off to his next destination.

Opal is left to ponder for just a brief fleeting moment at the mayor's actions, before her programming kicks in and forces her to return to organizing her assorted candies for the upcoming holiday.

The mayor on the other hand, continues his bizarre peregrination, a conquest merely disguised as a sheepish attempt to inspect other's homes, for practically no reason at all.

'Don't know why, but I have the incredible urge to ransack through everybody's shit today.'

Re-phrase that, a reason does exist, it's just incredibly asinine.

Opal's Official House Inspection: Reluctantly passed with flying colors. (Points docked for dumb headdress and candy.)

Fire Hydrant, Water Pump, Drinking Fountain for quote en quote 'Elephant Business': Approved.