17. WE SHOP FOR WATERBEDS Leo read It was Annabeth's idea.
"To shop for waterbeds?" Leo asked
"Just read Leo" she told him
"Things are always Annabeth's idea though" Thalia said
"No. Sometimes it's Percy's risk taker ideas" Annabeth argued
She loaded us into the back of a Vegas taxi as if we actually had money, and told the driver, "Los Angeles, please. "
"From Vegas? Seriously?" Piper commented
The cabbie chewed his cigar and sized us up. "That's three hundred miles. For that, you gotta pay up front. "
"But you have no money" Amethyst said
"You accept casino debit cards?" Annabeth asked.
"Ohhhhh"
He shrugged. "Some of em. Same as credit cards. I gotta swipe em through first. "
Annabeth handed him her green Lotus Cash card.
He looked at it skeptically.
"Swipe it," Annabeth invited.
He did.
His meter machine started rattling. The lights flashed. Finally an infinity symbol came up next to the dollar sign.
"Please tell me you still have it! Tell me! Tell me! Tell me!" Leo pleaded
"No"
"No you won't tell me or no you don't have it?"
"No Leo I don't have it anymore"
"Such a waste" he whined
The cigar fell out of the drivers mouth. He looked back at us, his eyes wide. "Where to in Los Angeles. . . uh, Your Highness?"
"The girl with the princess curls got a princess treatment" Thalia said
"The Santa Monica Pier. " Annabeth sat up a little straighter. I could tell she liked the "Your Highness" thing. "Get us there fast, and you can keep the change."
"Why?!" Leo cried
Maybe she shouldn't have told him that. The cabs speedometer never dipped below ninety-five the whole way through the Mojave Desert.
On the road, we had plenty of time to talk. I told Annabeth and Grover about my latest dream, but the details got sketchier the more I tried to remember them. The Lotus Casino seemed to have short-circuited my memory. I couldn't recall what the invisible servants voice had sounded like, though I was sure it was somebody I knew. The servant had called the monster in the pit something other than "my lord" . . . some special name or title. . . .
"Maybe that's why you found the Lotus Casino" Reyna said
"What?"
"You reached a stop in vegas just when you had that dream about the servant and his master. Maybe in some way the master manipulated something to let you reach the casino so that you'd forget some of the details of your dream" Jason said in realization
"That could be possible" Percy agreed
"The Silent One?" Annabeth suggested. "The Rich One? Both of those are nicknames for Hades. "
"That's not it" Hazel said
"Maybe . . . " I said, though neither sounded quite right.
"That throne room sounds like Hades," Grover said. "That's the way it's usually described. "
I shook my head. "Something's wrong. The throne room wasn't the main part of the dream. And that voice from the pit . . . I don't know. It just didn't feel like a god's voice. "
'Because it wasn't a gods voice' Percy and Annabeth thought
Annabeths eyes widened.
"What?" I asked.
"Oh . . . nothing. I was just—No, it has to be Hades. Maybe he sent this thief, this invisible person, to get the master bolt, and something went wrong—"
"You were already realizing who it was. But you were denying it" Rachel said and Annabeth nodded
"Like what?"
"I—I dont know," she said. "But if he stole Zeus's symbol of power from Olympus, and the gods were hunting him, I mean, a lot of things could go wrong. So this thief had to hide the bolt, or he lost it somehow. Anyway, he failed to bring it to Hades. That's what the voice said in your dream, right? The guy failed. That would explain what the Furies were searching for when they came after us on the bus. Maybe they thought we had retrieved the bolt. "
"But why would you still go on a quest if you've already retrieved the bolt?" Calypso asked
I wasn't sure what was wrong with her. She looked pale.
Annabeth frowned
"But if I'd already retrieved the bolt," I said, "why would I be traveling to the Underworld?"
"Yeah. Why?" Nick asked
"To threaten Hades," Grover suggested. "To bribe or blackmail him into getting your mom back. "
I whistled. "You have evil thoughts for a goat. "
"Why, thank you. "
"But the thing in the pit said it was waiting for two items," I said. "If the master bolt is one, what's the other?"
Nico was deep in thought he knew what item it was. After that incident his father had become really protective with his helm of darkness. Well…. That's what the ghost have told Nico.
Grover shook his head, clearly mystified.
Annabeth was looking at me as if she knew my next question, and was silently willing me not to ask it.
"You have an idea what might be in that pit, don't you?" I asked her. "I mean, if it isnt Hades?"
"Percy . . . let's not talk about it. Because if it isn't Hades . . . No. It has to be Hades. "
"Sadly it wasn't Hades" Nico whispered but a few people heard him.
Wasteland rolled by. We passed a sign that said CALIFORNIA STATE LINE, 12 MILES.
I got the feeling I was missing one simple, critical piece of information. It was like when I stared at a common word I should know, but I couldn't make sense of it because one or two letters were floating around. The more I thought about my quest, the more I was sure that confronting Hades wasn't the real answer. There was something else going on, something even more dangerous.
"Your thoughts are making me scared and sad" Amethyst said "Can I go to sleep again?"
"Nooooo. You're hearing his thoughts along with us" Jessy told her which made the girl frown
The problem was: we were hurtling toward the Underworld at ninety-five miles an hour, betting that Hades had the master bolt. If we got there and found out we were wrong, we wouldn't have time to correct ourselves. The solstice deadline would pass and war would begin.
"Positive thoughts. Think happy thoughts. Gummy bears and chocolates" Amy whispered to herself over and over
"Don't mind her. That's just her keep calm mantra" Trina said
"She does that a lot?" Percy asked
"Yeah whenever she feels stressed out" Trina answered
"It always works though. I try it sometimes" Jessy said smiling at Amy who had her eyes closed and was still whispering to herself
"The answer is in the Underworld," Annabeth assured me. "You saw spirits of the dead, Percy. There's only one place that could be. We're doing the right thing. "
"How do we know when we're doing the right thing?" Hazel asked
"What?"
"A right thing for you could be different for another person so how do we really know when we are doing the right thing?"
"Sort of like when we do a deviant act" Annabeth started "What may be deviant for me could not be deviant for Piper. And what can be deviant for mortals may not be for demigods. It always depends on who is doing the act, in what situation they are doing it, and who is seeing them doing it"
"What?" A few people asked not following what Hazel and Annabeth were saying
"The right thing and the wrong thing always varies. To me it could be the right thing, but to those watching me I could not be doing the right thing based on their perspective. And sometimes people may think its the right thing but it's wrong for the situation"
"I still don't get it" Will said and a few nodded
"Why are we talking about this again?" Leo asked
"I don't know" Percy said "Why are we talking about this again?"
"I think Hazel started it" Grover said
Hazel rolled her eyes
"Sort of like when you think you're doing the best for a person but they think you're doing the opposite" Alex said
"Exactly!" Annabeth exclaimed "It always varies depending on the person, the audience and the situation"
"Audience?" Nick asked
"Are we talking films now?" Percy asked
After another explanation from Annabeth about the relativity of deviance and a few people still not getting it or didn't pay attention to what she was saying, she decided to just let Leo continue reading.
She tried to boost our morale by suggesting clever strategies for getting into the Land of the Dead, but my heart wasn't in it. There were just too many unknown factors.
"Factors? Like a math test?" Frank asked
"Ugh I hate math! Let's not mention it please" Jess grumbled
"Also because Annabeth might start lecturing us about math" Thalia said "Read fast Leo"
It was like cramming for a test without knowing the subject. And believe me, I'd done that enough times.
"Who hasn't?" Leo asked and Annabeth, Trina, Amethyst, Jason, Reyna and Josh raised their hands
The cab sped west. Every gust of wind through Death Valley sounded like a spirit of the dead. Every time the brakes hissed on an eighteen-wheeler, it reminded me of Echidnas reptilian voice.
At sunset, the taxi dropped us at the beach in Santa Monica. It looked exactly the way L. A. beaches do in the movies, only it smelled worse. There were carnival rides lining the Pier, palm trees lining the sidewalks, homeless guys sleeping in the sand dunes, and surfer dudes waiting for the perfect wave.
Grover, Annabeth, and I walked down to the edge of the surf.
"What now?" Annabeth asked.
The Pacific was turning gold in the setting sun.
"Oh I love that" Trina said smiling
I thought about how long it had been since I'd stood on the beach at Montauk, on the opposite side of the country, looking out at a different sea.
How could there be a god who could control all that? What did my science teacher used to say—two-thirds of the earth's surface was covered in water?
"Of course you'll remember that" Annabeth said smiling
How could I be the son of someone that powerful?
"Do I have to explain how babies are made?" Will asked
"WILL!"
I stepped into the surf.
"Percy?" Annabeth said. "What are you doing?"
"Stepping into the surf?" Amy answered
I kept walking, up to my waist, then my chest.
She called after me, "You know how polluted that water is? There all kinds of toxic—"
That's when my head went under.
"Perfect way to avoid a conversation" Leo laughed
"Or a fight" Jason added
"He really does it sometimes" Trina laughed
"What happened to always listening to Annabeth?" Rachel asked
"Always but with a few exceptions?" Percy said
I held my breath at first. Its difficult to intentionally inhale water. Finally I couldn't stand it anymore. I gasped. Sure enough, I could breathe normally.
"Well duh! Because Poseidon!" Amy told Percy who rolled his eyes
I walked down into the shoals. I shouldn't have been able to see through the murk, but somehow I could tell where everything was. I could sense the rolling texture of the bottom. I could make out sand-dollar colonies dotting the sandbars. I could even see the currents, warm and cold streams swirling together.
I felt something rub against my leg. I looked down and almost shot out of the water like a ballistic missile. Sliding along beside me was a five-foot-long mako shark.
"Seriously?!" Everyone cried out
"Aww they're like dogs" Trina said while Amethyst nodded her head in agreement
"They love being patted on their dorsal fins. They really are like dogs" Amethyst added
"But they're sharks!" Rachel cried
"They don't harm us. They love us!" Trina said
But the thing wasn't attacking. It was nuzzling me. Heeling like a dog.
"See? Like a dog!"
Tentatively, I touched its dorsal fin. It bucked a little, as if inviting me to hold tighter. I grabbed the fin with both hands. It took off, pulling me along. The shark carried me down into the darkness. It deposited me at the edge of the ocean proper, where the sandbank dropped off into a huge chasm. It was like standing on the rim of the Grand Canyon at midnight, not being able to see much, but knowing the void was right there.
The surface shimmered maybe a hundred and fifty feet above. I knew I should've been crushed by the pressure. Then again, I shouldn't have been able to breathe. I wondered if there was a limit to how deep I could go, if I could sink straight to the bottom of the Pacific.
"Have you tried testing the limit?" Piper asked
"I don't think there's a limit" Annabeth answered for Percy "But have you tried though seaweed brain?"
"So far I haven't reached a limit yet"
Then I saw something glimmering in the darkness below, growing bigger and brighter as it rose toward me. A woman's voice, like my mothers, called: "Percy Jackson. "
As she got closer, her shape became clearer. She had flowing black hair, a dress made of green silk. Light flickered around her, and her eyes were so distractingly beautiful I hardly noticed the stallion-sized sea horse she was riding.
"Woah"
She dismounted. The seahorse and the mako shark whisked off and started playing something that looked like tag.
"I love it when they do that!" Amethyst cried out cheerfully "they look so adorable!"
The underwater lady smiled at me. "You've come far, Percy Jackson. Well done. "
I wasn't quite sure what to do, so I bowed. "You're the woman who spoke to me in the Mississippi River. "
"Yes, child. I am a Nereid, a spirit of the sea. It was not easy to appear so far upriver, but the naiads, my freshwater cousins, helped sustain my life force. They honor Lord Poseidon, though they do not serve in his court. "
"And . . . you serve in Poseidon's court?"
She nodded. "It has been many years since a child of the Sea God has been born. We have watched you with great interest. "
"See? We're always being watched!" Leo cried out
"Seriously do you guys think we're being watched right now?" Hazel asked
"Probably"
"By who?"
"By the fates?"
"The gods?"
"How are we being watched?"
"Hidden camera's?!"
"We should find those cameras!"
"Guys" Annabeth said trying to interrupt the discussion in front of her
"SHUT UP!" Annabeth cried out and everyone stopped talking and looked at her
"Like I said before it's only going to drive us crazy. As much as I would want to find out as well. It won't do us any good if we stop reading and do something else. So let's just continue reading and hopefully get some answers"
A moment of silence
"Read Leo!"
"Alright Alright"
Suddenly I remembered faces in the waves off Montauk Beach when I was a little boy, reflections of smiling women. Like so many of the weird things in my life, I'd never given it much thought before.
"You've been surrounded by women all your life, Perce" Grover said
"And would be surrounded by women for the rest of my life" Percy said looking at his daughters
"Also the fact that a few girls seems to be really interested in him" Thalia said while Annabeth rolled her eyes
"What do you mean?" Hazel asked
"Were there other girls besides Annabeth?" Frank asked
Rachel, Calypso and Reyna were trying to avoid everyone's eyes
"There were a few" Annabeth said while Percy hugged her tighter
"Who?" Jason asked
"Well now that I think about it there was this one amazon during our quest" Frank said
"Frank!"
"Ooops. I'm frank! I'm sorry!"
"An amazon?"Annabeth asked Percy
"Did I forget to tell you about that?" Percy smiled nervously
"Is forget the right term?" Annabeth asked annoyed
"Uhm is that a trick question?"
"I think this is the time where you run, daddy" Amethyst suggested
Percy looked back and forth between Annabeth and the door afraid that he might get judo flipped again
"I turned her down" he said quietly but everyone heard him
"He turned everyone down Annabeth, don't worry" Rachel smiled at Annabeth
"Wait a second" Piper said "You and Percy?" She asked Rachel
"I was part of a triangle" Rachel admitted
"A triangle?" Jason asked
"A love triangle" Piper answered
"But Annabeth said there were a few of them" Hazel said "Who are the others?"
"So it wasn't really a triangle?" Will asked
"Maybe they didn't happen at the same time" Alex said
"Oh it was a square for a bit" Annabeth said sneaking a peak at Calypso
"You?" Piper asked Calypso who had seen the glance that Annabeth had given her
"Percy was stuck in my island for a while" Calypso answered
"You know about that?" Jason asked Leo who nodded
"So there were just two of them?" Nick asked "plus the amazon?"
"One more actually. For a brief moment" Reyna said
"Who?" A few asked her and Reyna gave them a look like it should be obvious
"YOU?!"
Reyna nodded and Annabeth was laughing at how this conversation was making Percy really uncomfortable. She high fived Rachel and gave Reyna and Calypso a smile.
"I thought you liked Jason?" Leo asked
"What?!" Jessy asked
"You didn't know?" Hazel asked
"No" Jessy said
"I knew" Josh answered
"Why didn't you tell me?!"
"I thought you knew Jess"
"I didn't know and I wanted to know" she pouted
"It's ancient history Jess"
"But I still would have wanted to know!"
Leo sighed "I feel you bros" he said patting both Jason and Percy at the back "With guys as hot like us all da ladies luv us!"
"Whatever Leo" Jason said
"Say it with me!" Leo cried out
"Say what?" Percy asked
"All da ladies luv us!"
"Yeah… no"
"Read Valdez"
"If my father is so interested in me," I said, "why isn't he here? Why doesn't he speak to me?"
A cold current rose out of the depths.
"Do not judge the Lord of the Sea too harshly," the Nereid told me. "He stands at the brink of an unwanted war. He has much to occupy his time. Besides, he is forbidden to help you directly. The gods may not show such favoritism. "
"I don't get that rule at all" Piper said
"Nobody does" Hazel said
"Even to their own children?"
"Especially to them. The gods can work by indirect influence only. That is why I give you a warning, and a gift. "
She held out her hand. Three white pearls flashed in her palm.
"I know your journey to Hades realm," she said. "Few mortals have ever done this and survived: Orpheus, who had great music skill; Hercules, who had great strength; Houdini, who could escape even the depths of Tartarus. Do you have these talents?"
"Music skills? Nope" Thalia said
"Trina can sing though" Nick said
"You do?" Annabeth asked Trina who then glared at Nick
"Not really" she answered timidly
"By not really she means she's amazing" Nick said
"Nick stop"
"Oh we have to hear you sing!" Will said
Trina shook her head
"Come on!" Percy said
"After Lunch!" Annabeth said
Trina was about to protest but Leo had already continued reading
"Urn . . . no, ma'am. "
"Ah, but you have something else, Percy. You have gifts you have only begun to know. The oracles have foretold a great and terrible future for you, should you survive to manhood. Poseidon would not have you die before your time. Therefore take these, and when you are in need, smash a pearl at your feet. "
"Then what?" Nico asked
"What will happen?"
"That," she said, "depends on the need. But remember: what belongs to the sea will always return to the sea. "
"What belongs to the sea will always return to the sea" Trina repeated "I like that"
"What about the warning?"
Her eyes flickered with green light. "Go with what your heart tells you, or you will lose all. Hades feeds on doubt and hopelessness. He will trick you if he can, make you mistrust your own judgment. Once you are in his realm, he will never willingly let you leave. Keep faith. Good luck, Percy Jackson. "
She summoned her sea horse and rode toward the void.
"Wait!" I called. "At the river, you said not to trust the gifts. What gifts?"
"Wait!" Alex said "you already received gifts!"
"Which one?" Jess asked
"The backpack from Ares" Alex answered
"Ohmygods! Your right!"
"Goodbye, young hero," she called back, her voice fading into the depths. "You must listen to your heart. " She became a speck of glowing green, and then she was gone.
I wanted to follow her down into the darkness. I wanted to see the court of Poseidon. But I looked up at the sunset darkening on the surface. My friends are waiting. We had so little time. . . .
I kicked upward toward the shore.
When I reached the beach, my clothes dried instantly. I told Grover and Annabeth what had happened, and showed them the pearls.
Annabeth grimaced. "No gift comes without a price. "
"You didn't say that about Ares' backpack" Alex pointed out
"They were free. "
"No. " She shook her head. "There is no such thing as a free lunch. That's an ancient Greek saying that translated pretty well into American. There will be a price. You wait. "
On that happy thought, we turned our backs on the sea.
"How was that a happy thought?" Amethyst asked
With some spare change from Ares backpack, we took the bus into West Hollywood. I showed the driver the Underworld address slip I'd taken from Aunty Em's Garden Gnome Emporium, but he'd never heard of DOA Recording Studios.
"You remind me of somebody I saw on TV," he told me. "You a child actor or something?"
"Uh . . . I'm a stunt double . . . for a lot of child actors. "
"Nice save" Thalia said
"Oh! That explains it. "
We thanked him and got off quickly at the next stop.
We wandered for miles on foot, looking for DOA. Nobody seemed to know where it was. It didn't appear in the phone book.
"Because it's hidden by the mist!" Hazel told him
Twice, we ducked into alleys to avoid cop cars.
I froze in front of an appliance-store window because a television was playing an interview with somebody who looked very familiar—my stepdad, Smelly Gabe. He was talking to Barbara Walters—I mean, as if he were some kind of huge celebrity. She was interviewing him in our apartment, in the middle of a poker game,
"You and Sally are missing and he's playing poker?!" Annabeth cried out
and there was a young blond lady sitting next to him, patting his hand.
A fake tear glistened on his cheek. He was saying, "Honest, Ms. Walters, if it wasn't for Sugar here, my grief counselor, I'd be a wreck. My stepson took everything I cared about. My wife . . . my Camaro . . . I—I'm sorry. I have trouble talking about it. "
A few growls and curses were heard in the room
"There you have it, America. " Barbara Walters turned to the camera. "A man torn apart. An adolescent boy with serious issues. Let me show you, again, the last known photo of this troubled young fugitive, taken a week ago in Denver. "
"FUGITIVE?!"
The screen cut to a grainy shot of me, Annabeth, and Grover standing outside the Colorado diner, talking to Ares.
"SERIOUSLY?!"
"That was the photo taken by the waitress and the cook!"
"Who are the other children in this photo?" Barbara Walters asked dramatically. "Who is the man with them? Is Percy Jackson a delinquent, a terrorist, or perhaps the brainwashed victim of a frightening new cult? When we come back, we chat with a leading child psychologist. Stay tuned, America. "
More curses were heard around the room that Amethyst's ears had to be covered by her big sister
"Cmon," Grover told me. He hauled me away before I could punch a hole in the appliance-store window.
"You should've let him punch something!" Thalia argued
"And get more photos of us taken and risk getting caught by the police?" Grover retorted back
It got dark, and hungry-looking characters started coming out on the streets to play. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm a New Yorker. I don't scare easy.
"Definitely" Alex who also happens to be a New Yorker agreed with Percy.
But L. A. had a totally different feel from New York. Back home, everything seemed close. It didn't matter how big the city was, you could get anywhere without getting lost. The street pattern and the subway made sense. There was a system to how things worked. A kid could be safe as long as he wasn't stupid.
"True" Alex said
"Hey! I got lost in New York a few times" Will said "I'm not from New York you know"
L. A. wasn't like that. It was spread out, chaotic, hard to move around. It reminded me of Ares. It wasn't enough for L. A. to be big; it had to prove it was big by being loud and strange and difficult to navigate, too.
"It's not that difficult" Piper said
"That's cause you live in L.A!" Percy said
I didn't know how we were ever going to find the entrance to the Underworld by tomorrow, the summer solstice.
We walked past gangbangers, bums, and street hawkers, who looked at us like they were trying to figure if we were worth the trouble of mugging.
As we hurried passed the entrance of an alley, a voice from the darkness said, "Hey, you. "
"oh no" Amethyst said
Like an idiot, I stopped.
"Why's you stop?! You shouldn't have stopped!" Thalia cried out while at the same time slapping Percy upside the head
Before I knew it, we were surrounded. A gang of kids had circled us. Six of them in all—white kids with expensive clothes and mean faces. Like the kids at Yancy Academy: rich brats playing at being bad boys.
Instinctively, I uncapped Riptide.
"Why!?"
When the sword appeared out of nowhere, the kids backed off, but their leader was either really stupid or really brave, because he kept coming at me with a switchblade.
"You know it can't affect mortals dummy!"Another comment from Thalia
"I didn't know for sure!"
I made the mistake of swinging.
The kid yelped. But he must've been one hundred percent mortal, because the blade passed harmlessly right through his chest. He looked down. "What the . . ."
I figured I had about three seconds before his shock turned to anger. "Run!" I screamed at Annabeth and Grover.
"So now you run" Thalia sighed
We pushed two kids out of the way and raced down the street, not knowing where we were going. We turned a sharp corner.
"There!" Annabeth shouted.
Only one store on the block looked open, its windows glaring with neon. The sign above the door said something like CRSTUYS WATRE BDE ALPACE.
"Crustys Water Bed Palace?" Grover translated.
"Oh so that's why it's Annabeth's idea" Piper commented remembering the chapter's title
It didn't sound like a place I'd ever go except in an emergency, but this definitely qualified.
We burst through the doors, ran behind a water bed, and ducked. A split second later, the gang kids ran past outside.
"I think we lost them," Grover panted.
"Don't jinx it Grover!" Thalia yelled
A voice behind us boomed, "Lost who?"
We all jumped.
"Who wouldn't?" Nick asked
Standing behind us was a guy who looked like a raptor in a leisure suit. He was at least seven feet tall, with absolutely no hair. He had gray, leathery skin, thick-lidded eyes, and a cold, reptilian smile. He moved toward us slowly, but I got the feeling he could move fast if he needed to.
"Monster! Monster! Monster!" Leo teased
"What are you doing, Leo?" Calypso asked
"This guy's a monster!"
"Well duh" Thalia commented rolling her eyes "Just read Valdez"
His suit might've come from the Lotus Casino. It belonged back in the seventies, big-time. The shirt was silk paisley, unbuttoned halfway down his hairless chest. The lapels on his velvet jacket were as wide as landing strips. The silver chains around his neck—I couldn't even count them.
"I'm Crusty," he said, with a tartar-yellow smile.
"The crab?" Amethyst asked
I resisted the urge to say, Yes, you are.
"Sorry to barge in," I told him. "We were just, um, browsing. "
"You mean hiding from those no-good kids," he grumbled. "They hang around every night. I get a lot of people in here, thanks to them. Say, you want to look at a water bed?"
I was about to say No, thanks, when he put a huge paw on my shoulder and steered me deeper into the showroom.
"Paw?" Rachel asked
There was every kind of water bed you could imagine: different kinds of wood, different patterns of sheets; queen-size, king-size, emperor-of-the-universe-size.
"So a size for Zeus then?" Thalia asked
"Yep" Grover answered
"This is my most popular model. " Crusty spread his hands proudly over a bed covered with black satin sheets, with built-in Lava Lamps on the headboard. The mattress vibrated, so it looked like oil-flavored Jell-O.
"Million-hand massage," Crusty told us. "Go on, try it out. Shoot, take a nap. I don't care. No business today, any-way.
"What?" Jessy commented
"He said to" Nick started
"I know Nick!"
"Um," I said, "I don't think . . . "
"Million-hand massage!" Grover cried, and dove in. "Oh, you guys! This is cool. "
"GROVER!"
"Sorry"
"You were the one with the monster sensing nose!"
"Hmm," Crusty said, stroking his leathery chin. "Almost, almost. "
"Almost what?" I asked.
He looked at Annabeth. "Do me a favor and try this one over here, honey. Might fit. "
"Fit? What's that an outfit?" Jessy scoffed "speaking of outfits! I love what you're wearing Trina!"
Everyone turned their heads to look at what Trina was wearing.
She was wearing denim overalls with a white off-shoulder top
"You bought me this" Trina told her
"Exactly! That really suits you! I love it!" Jessy smiled at her
Annabeth said, "But what—"
He patted her reassuringly on the shoulder and led her over to the Safari Deluxe model with teakwood lions carved into the frame and a leopard-patterned comforter. When Annabeth didn't want to lie down, Crusty pushed her.
"That's mean" Amethyst pouted
"He's a monster. What do you expect?" Nick told her Grover tried to get up, but ropes sprang from his black-satin bed, too, and lashed him down.
"Hey!" she protested.
Crusty snapped his fingers. "Ergo!"
Ropes sprang from the sides of the bed, lashing around Annabeth, holding her to the mattress.
"N-not c-c-cool!" he yelled, his voice vibrating from the million-hand massage. "N-not c-cool a-at all!"
"I think I'm going to be afraid of my bed tonight" Amethyst said
"You can sleep in my room" Annabeth told her
The giant looked at Annabeth, then turned toward me and grinned. "Almost, darn it. "
I tried to step away, but his hand shot out and clamped around the back of my neck. "Whoa, kid. "Don't worry. We'll find you one in a sec. "
"Let my friends go. "
"Oh, sure I will. But I got to make them fit, first. "
"What?" Piper asked
"What do you mean?"
"All the beds are exactly six feet, see? Your friends are too short. Got to make them fit. "
"Why not just make beds that are not six feet?" Frank cried out
Annabeth and Grover kept struggling.
"Can't stand imperfect measurements," Crusty muttered. "Ergo!"
"Well he's too much of a perfectionist" Reyna commented
"I know right?" Will agreed
A new set of ropes leaped out from the top and bottom of the beds, wrapping around Grover and Annabeth's ankles, then around their armpits. The ropes started tightening, pulling my friends from both ends.
Everyone had very shocked expressions and were sneaking glances at both Annabeth and Grover making sure that they were okay.
"Don't worry," Crusty told me, "These are stretching jobs. Maybe three extra inches on their spines. They might even live. Now why don't we find a bed you like, huh?"
"Might?!" Calypso shrieked
"Percy!" Grover yelled.
My mind was racing. I knew I couldn't take on this giant water-bed salesman alone. He would snap my neck before I ever got my sword out.
"Your real names not Crusty, is it?" I asked.
"Not at all" Trina muttered
"Legally, its Procrustes," he admitted.
"The Stretcher," I said. I remembered the story: the giant who'd tried to kill Theseus with excess hospitality on his way to Athens.
"Yeah," the salesman said. "But who can pronounce Procrustes? Bad for business. Now Crusty, anybody can say that. "
"He's got a point though" Will said
"You're right. Its got a good ring to it. "
"What are you doing, Percy?!" Rachel asked and gave him a glare
Percy decided to not answer her and to just let Leo read the chapter
His eyes lit up. "You think so?"
"Oh, absolutely," I said. "And the workmanship on these beds? Fabulous!"
"Excuse me Percy but do you actually want Annabeth and Grover to be stretched to death?!" Thalia screamed at him
"Oh shut up Pinecone face"
He grinned hugely, but his fingers didn't loosen on my neck. "I tell my customers that. Every time. Nobody bothers to look at the workmanship. How many built-in Lava Lamp headboards have you seen?"
"Not too many. "
"That's right!"
"Percy!" Annabeth yelled. "What are you doing?"
"See?! Even Annabeth agrees!" Rachel screamed at him while Thalia also throwed him a glare
"Just let Leo read!" Percy cried out
"Don't mind her," I told Procrustes. "She's impossible. "
"Can you still tell her that now?" Jason asked him
"Nope" Percy answered
The giant laughed. "All my customers are. Never six feet exactly. So inconsiderate. And then they complain about the fitting. "
"What do you do if they're longer than six feet?"
"Oh, that happens all the time. Its a simple fix. "
He let go of my neck, but before I could react, he reached behind a nearby sales desk and brought out a huge double-bladed brass axe. He said, "I just center the subject as best I can and lop off whatever hangs over on either end. "
"You've got to be kidding me" Jessy said
"I wish. But he isn't" Trina told her
"Ah," I said, swallowing hard. "Sensible. "
"I'm so glad to come across an intelligent customer!"
A few people snorted and rolled their eyes
The ropes were really stretching my friends now. Annabeth was turning pale. Grover made gurgling sounds, like a strangled goose.
"Now it's Grover the goose!" Amethyst laughed
"So, Crusty . . . " I said, trying to keep my voice light. I glanced at the sales tag on the valentine-shaped Honeymoon Special. "Does this one really have dynamic stabilizers to stop wave motion?"
"Hurry up Percy!" Piper screamed
"Absolutely. Try it out. "
"Yeah, maybe I will. But would it work even for a big guy like you? No waves at all?"
"Oh" Trina commented realizing Percy's plan "Nice"
"What?" Nick asked
"You'll see"
"Guaranteed. "
"No way. "
"Way. "
"Show me. "
"Why do I feel like you're two teenagers talking about make-up?" Josh asked
"What makes you think that?" Jason asked
Josh, Nick and Alex looked at each other before pointing at Jessy and Trina
"We get to hear conversations like that all the time with these two" Nick answered
"Especially me since I live with one of them and dating the other one" Josh said
"Don't forget the other Aphrodite girls at Camp" Alex said
"Trina you have to try this lipstick it's amazing and will totally suit you. Really? No way! Yes Way! Show me!" Nick said doing a fake impression of Trina and Jessy's conversation
"Uhm Nick" Alex started "I've received that glare from Jess multiple times when we were dating and that does not look good" Alex told Nick who was looking at Jess glaring at Nick
Nick immediately jumped and pushed Alex to his previous spot on the couch "Go sit with your ex while I try to avoid her" Nick told his brother and ducked behind Will
Jess was still glaring at Nick but she was also glaring at Alex too
"Are you mad at me too?" he asked her
"Oh let's just read" Jessy grumbled and scooted away from him
He sat down eagerly on the bed, patted the mattress. "No waves. See?"
I snapped my fingers. "Ergo. "
Ropes lashed around Crusty and flattened him against the mattress.
"Hey!" he yelled.
"Center him just right," I said.
The ropes readjusted themselves at my command. Crustys whole head stuck out the top. His feet stuck out the bottom.
"Go Percy!" Jason cheered
"No!" he said. "Wait! This is just a demo. "
I uncapped Riptide. "A few simple adjustments . . . "
I had no qualms about what I was about to do. If Crusty were human, I couldn't hurt him anyway. If he was a monster, he deserved to turn into dust for a while.
"You drive a hard bargain," he told me. "I'll give you thirty percent off on selected floor models. "
"Oh precious Crusty still doing business as he was about to die" Leo said in a very serious tone
"I think I'll start with the top. " I raised my sword.
"No money down! No interest for six months!"
I swung the sword. Crusty stopped making offers.
I cut the ropes on the other beds. Annabeth and Grover got to their feet, groaning and wincing and cursing me a lot.
"Who wouldn't?" Thalia said
"You look taller," I said.
"Very funny," Annabeth said. "Be faster next time. "
"Definitely" Annabeth said rubbing her neck
I looked at the bulletin board behind Crustys sales desk. There was an advertisement for Hermes Delivery Service, and another for the All-New Compendium of L. A. Area Monsters—"The only Monstrous Yellow Pages you'll ever need!" Under that, a bright orange flier for DOA Recording Studios, offering commissions for heroes souls. "We are always looking for new talent!" DOAs address was right underneath with a map.
"Come on," I told my friends.
"Give us a minute," Grover complained. "We were almost stretched to death. "
"Then youre ready for the Underworld," I said. "It's only a block from here. "
"Dun dun dun. That's the end of the chapter" Leo said "So who is ready to read about the underworld?"
"Lunch first. Then we read about the land of the dead" Annabeth said as she got up and everybody followed her lead
HELLO HELLO EVERYONE! HOPE YOU LIKE THIS CHAPTER AND PLEASE TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS IN A REVIEW. SEE YOU NEXT CHAPTER! XOXO CHINFEV1203