Chapter 23: The Irony of Marvin Trout
MysteriousMaker1185, thanks so much for your review! I'm glad that you liked the Lena reference, and the Fudge Express, and everything else! Here's history lesson #2, which focuses on Marvin Prune, with a short quote belonging to Herpes Trout, the early Mike Teavee. The Virtual Reality Testing Room is the 5th generation of Television-Chocolate, after all! :) Enjoy! :D
Despite persistent rumors saying that Marvin Prune's exit does not exist, that is not true. Marvin's exit fully exists, in all its glory, in two versions, as a matter of fact. The first one is with Mr. and Mrs. Bucket. This version features the voices and the white-coated assistants. The other version, one with Grandpa Joe, was not included as a part of any draft. After the draft with the voices, Roald finally created a draft where the tour is one time instead of weekly, and had 7 winners: Augustus Gloop, Veruca Salt, Miranda Mary Piker, Marvin Prune, Violet Beauregarde, Herpes Trout, and Charlie Bucket, now a white boy. The finding of the Golden Tickets were made much more important in this draft. This was also the draft where Marvin argued Mr. Wonka about the existence of the Whipple-Scrumpets (which I referenced multiple times in author's notes and in my story). The Grandpa Joe version shortened Marvin's song by just a few lines and changed some words around. The draft with seven winners stopped after Augustus' Gloop's early song. The Grandpa Joe version was what the exit would've been had he not decided to scrap Marvin Prune. Marvin's exit was supposed to be like the Spotty Powder version of Miranda Mary Piker, except changed around a bit, and Spotty Powder was named "Children's-Delight". Marvin's songs were:
"Three little children, already four too few.
But still they keep on going away, and now there's only two."
and
"Three rousing cheers! Hip-hip-hooray!
We've carted Marvin Prune away!
And as we very rightly thought
That in a case like this we ought
To see the thing completely through,
We've polished off his father, too.
(We hate to boast about our group,
But don't you think it's super-doop
To get entirely on our own
Two birds with but a single stone,
Two Prune-birds with a single shot?
It makes things quicker, does it not?)
And now, the Prune wife, Mrs. Prune
Is led away, and none too soon.
And as she goes, we think she must
Be rather puzzled, wondering just
What's happened to her family pair,
Especially the son and heir.
Was there, for instance, waiting there
To catch them going down the stair,
An iron mouth with teeth of tin
Which opened wide and sucked them in,
And chewed them to a soggy pulp,
And then, with one enormous gulp,
Devoured them quickly out of sight?
Might that have happened? Yes, it might.
And later on, some naughty fool
Who doesn't want to go to school
Will sprinkle dear Mr. Prune
And Marvin (with a tablespoon)
Upon his plate of wheaty-flakes.
And after that, it only takes
A sec for them to reappear
Together, just below the ear,
(Or maybe in another place
That isn't even on the face)
Each looking very red and hot-
A great big ugly measle spot."
The Grandpa Joe version got rid of:
"(We hate to boast about our group,
But don't you think it's super-doop
To get entirely on our own
Two birds with but a single stone,"
And instead did this:
"To see the thing completely through,
We've polished off his father, too.
(Two Prune-birds with a single shot?
It makes things quicker, does it not?)"
Regarding Mike Teavee, like I said, his original name was Herpes Trout. Here is a funny quote from him in that draft. It occurs right after Mr. Wonka said that shooting was a nasty habit.
'"It is nothing of the sort!"cried a voice from the crowd. The voice belonged to Herpes Trout, the boy who sat watching television all day long and had eighteen toy pistols hanging around his body. "Shooting," shouted Herpes Trout, "and especially shooting people, is the greatest thing there is! When I grow up I'm going to be The King of the Underworld and I'm going to drill holes in anybody who gives me an argument!"'
(All excerpts belong to the Roald Dahl Museum and Story Centre/Roald Dahl Nominee Limited and I do not claim ownership to them whatsoever.)
(Other Credits: Television Chocolate belongs to Roald Dahl, and the Virtual Reality Testing Room belongs to mattTheWriter072. The Slime Candies belong to Tessa. Thanks for letting me use it! I hope that you enjoy this chapter as well!) :D
On with the story, now! :)
Right when the wagon screeched to a halt, Marvin Trout started to wake up.
"I-is it over?" mumbled Marvin.
"Yes, it's over," responded Mr. Wonka. "Now, please follow me, Charlie, and Grandpa Joe safely out of the wagon and into the room, will you please? Thank you!"
The group entered the room. It was almost completely dark, rather dim, except for a ring of blue lights and a machine that looked like a flying saucer. On the right side of the room, Marvin Trout noticed a door that said: "TELEVISION CHOCOLATE".
"Come in here, first, will you please?" said Charlie Bucket.
The room that they walked into was so bright, that everyone screwed up their eyes in pain.
"Hurry up!" said Mr. Wonka, handing everyone a pair of dark glasses. "Put these on and don't take them off, whatever you do! This light could burn your eyeballs right out of your skulls!"
Once the glasses were put on, everyone saw a black camera. Oompa-Loompas in red spacesuits- at least, that's what everyone thought that they looked like- were polishing the black camera. In the Television Chocolate room, there was not a speck of dust anywhere, and everything was mysteriously quiet, even the Oompa-Loompas. They were not chattering, or singing or hopping and banging on the tiny drums that were hanging by a necklace on the back of their necks.
"Now, this is Television Chocolate!" exclaimed Mr. Wonka grandly. "This was what I told you all about in the Nostalgia Room! Watch as I send a gigantic bar of chocolate from one side of the room to the other- by television! Bring in the chocolate!"
A bunch of Oompa-Loompas came into the Television Chocolate room carrying the most enormous bar of chocolate that Alexis had ever seen. It was about as big as a large mattress! The Oompa-Loompas placed down the bar of chocolate down on a platform, then Mr. Wonka pulled down a switch. There was a flash, and suddenly, the bar of chocolate was gone!
"The bar of chocolate is now whizzing right above our heads in a million, tiny little pieces!" exclaimed Mr. Wonka excitedly.
"That's impossible!" cried Marvin.
"Just you wait and see," smirked Charlie Bucket.
A few seconds later, slowly yet surely, the bar of chocolate began to appear in the screen.
"Take it, Marvin!" Mr. Wonka exclaimed excitedly.
"How can you take it?" said Marvin Trout, laughing. "That's not Television Chocolate! That's chocolate on television! It's just a picture on a television screen!"
"You," said Mr. Wonka, smiling at Alexis. "You take it! Go on!"
Alexis reached for the chocolate, and her hand actually went inside of the television!
"Holy Buckets!" murmured Alexis' mother, completely forgetting Charlie's last name.
"Go on!" exclaimed Mr. Wonka happily. "Try it! It's the same bar, it's just gotten a little smaller on the journey, that's all!"
Alexis opened the chocolate bar, and took a nibble out of it.
"It's absolutely delicious!" exclaimed Alexis Williams.
"It's a miracle!" exclaimed Adam Wood.
"It's a TV dinner!" exclaimed Emma P. Perr.
"Now, that, my dear friends," said Mr. Wonka, hustling everyone out of the room, "was Television Chocolate! Now, this is Virtual Reality Chocolate! It combines the virtual with the reality! It can transfer you into any book, movie, or video game that you wish! Watch!"
Mr. Wonka flicked his fingers, then suddenly, without warning, a small humanoid robot, about the size of a four-year old child, walked up to him.
"I would like you to demonstrate to our group here our Virtual Reality technology, please," Mr. Wonka ordered.
The robot nodded and walked under the saucer-shaped object. Green scanners start to surround it.
"This scanner technology is so advanced," said Mr. Wonka, "that it even works on moving objects!"
Mr. Wonka flicked his fingers, and the robot started to dance. Still, the scanners continued to work.
Suddenly, a blue flash was seen, and the robot disintegrated upwards into the saucer.
"It's gone!" exclaimed Adam.
"Of course it's gone," said Marvin. "This thing is just a cheap redo of Television Chocolate. That's all!"
"Actually, it's not," responded Grandpa Joe.
"This Virtual Reality System is the fifth generation of Television Chocolate technology," explained Mr. Wonka. "In this one, you actually stay the same size!"
"If that's true," said Marvin, "then what happened to the second through fourth generations?"
"Well," said Mr. Wonka, "the second generation added channels, except that they had to be changed by hand. The third generation, on the other hand, added remotes with sensors and removed the channel knob. The fourth generation was just the prototype of the Virtual Reality system that you see in front of you."
"Hurry!" cried Charlie Bucket, pointing to a screen on a tabletop. "The robot!"
"Let's go, everyone!" exclaimed Mr. Wonka. Everyone ran towards the screen, except for Marvin Trout, who just walked slowly.
Everyone saw the strangest thing. The robot that got teleported into the screen was actually fighting with two other robots! From its right arm, the robot fired a red laser, which hit one of the other robots, which caused it to disappear! He did the same to the other one. It disappeared as well.
"What happens now?" asked Adam.
"The robot has a chance to keep playing the game." said Mr. Wonka. "It also has the choice to return back to the real world. It looks like it will choose to do the latter."
A blue flash was seen under the saucer-shaped object, and everyone saw the robot, just like it was before it went inside of the game.
"That's amazing!" gasped Adam.
"It's...it's utterly flabbergasting!" cried Emma P. Perr.
"It's yet another miracle!" cried Alexis Williams.
"I've seen better," said Marvin Trout blandly.
"Oh, really?" said Mr. Wonka.
"Yeah," said Marvin. "And what do you plan to do with this...invention, may I ask?"
"I'm going to sell it," said Mr. Wonka. "But not right now, though. There are still some...technical issues to sort out in the program."
As soon as Marvin heard the words, 'I'm going to sell it', he instantly became enraged.
"How dare you!" yelled Marvin. "This technology will ruin the book industry! If you can going inside of any book that you want-!"
"And movie and video game," corrected Grandpa Joe.
"Oh, to heck with movies and video games!" yelled Marvin. "The thing is, I will never allow this technology to be sold! Right, father?"
"Quite right," said Mr. Trout, stepping up to Mr. Wonka. Marvin's father had a smooth white face, like a boiled onion.
"Mr. Wonka," said Mr. Trout, "I cannot allow you to sell this! It will absolutely destroy the book industry!"
"I only make things in my factory to please kids," said Mr. Wonka. "I don't care about what the grown-ups think."
"Come on then, father!" cried Marvin. "Let's destroy the Virtual Reality machine!"
"Forward!" exclaimed Mr. Trout, brandishing his cane and making his way toward the Virtual Reality machine, along with his son.
"Marvin's even worse than that Ryan Wilson kid," whispered Emma, speaking to Adam.
"Ryan Kline," said Adam.
"Right," said Emma. "That's who I was thinking of."
Mr. Trout was just about to hit the machine with his cane, when suddenly, the saucer started to scan Marvin and him. They tried to run away from it, but still, the lasers scanned them. There was a blue flash, and both of them disappeared.
"They're gone!" screamed Mrs. Trout.
"Let's watch the screen!" said Mr. Wonka.
Suddenly, everyone saw Marvin and his father. They were inside of a virtual Willy Wonka factory!
"Ha," said Marvin. "We're not inside of anything! That entire thing was special effects! It's all a scam!"
"Quite right, my son!" said Mr. Trout, patting his son proudly on the head.
"Come on!" said the virtual Mr. Wonka. "Let's get going!"
He led the group through a secret door in the back of the Virtual Reality Testing Room. Right across from that door was another door that said: "THE SLIME CANDY ROOM".
He led them into the Slime Candy Room. In it, there was a green and white swirl design on the floor, and there was a giant conveyor belt. Two hundred giant slugs were coating the candies with slime as they moved along it, and there was a detector on a part of the conveyor belt.
"Bad Candy," the detector said one time, then the conveyor belt got rerouted, and the candy went into a dark tunnel, which led to goodness knows where.
"Good Candy," the detector said, causing the conveyor to stay normally.
"Slime Candies are pranks!" announced the virtual Charlie Bucket. "Due to how slippery they are, they're almost impossible to hold, but if you do manage to eat one, then they will make your sweat glands produce slime for about two hours, leaving you covered in slime from head to toe."
"Pranks?" said Marvin Trout. "I strongly detest them! Father, do you hear what these things do? It's shocking! It mustn't be allowed!"
Mr. Trout stepped forward and faced the virtual Mr. Wonka.
"Mr. Wonka!" cried Mr. Trout. "I absolutely forbid for you to sell these things!"
"I'm sorry," said the virtual Mr. Wonka. "But I will continue selling them, no matter what you say."
Then, suddenly, without warning, Mr. Trout and Marvin busted open the gate that led down to the area where the slugs were doing their work. Everything became quiet. Right when Mr. Trout was about to bust the conveyor belt with his cane, all the slugs in the room darted after the two helpless people.
"What?!" cried the virtual Emma. "How are the slugs so fast?!"
"Breeding," said the virtual Mr. Wonka. "Coating Slime Candies is quite a quick job, so I need quick slugs to do it."
"What are they doing?" asked a virtual Alexis.
"Just watch," responded the virtual Mr. Wonka.
The slugs darted after the two people, coating them from head to toe in slippery slime. Mr. Trout tried to hit them with his cane, which, unfortunately, backfired for him, causing him to bump into Marvin, and both of them tumbled onto the conveyor belt. They tried to get back up, but every time that they did, they fell back down to the ground because of the slippery slime. They were getting closer and closer to the detector.
"Help!" screamed Marvin Trout.
"Help!" screamed Mr. Trout.
"Bad Candy," said the detector, rerouting Marvin.
"Bad Candy," said the detector, rerouting Mr. Trout.
They began to get closer and closer to the dark tunnel. Mr. Trout threw his cane in the air in fear, and it landed right behind him, right as Marvin went into the tunnel, then down a hole, followed by Mr. Trout, then the cane…
"Ahhhhhh!" screamed Marvin Trout.
"Ahhhhhh!" screamed Mr. Trout.
"Where does that hole go to?!" screamed the virtual Mrs. Trout.
"Why, to the furnace," said the virtual Mr. Wonka calmly. "To the incinerator. We burn all of our bad candies there, along with our bad nuts, all sorts of other garbage."
The virtual Mrs. Trout opened her mouth and began to scream.
"Don't worry, my dear lady," said the virtual Mr. Wonka, patting the virtual Mrs. Trout on the arm. "The incinerator is lit only every other day, so they have a good sporting chance, haven't they?"
"A chance?" screamed the virtual Mrs. Trout. "They'll be sizzled like a sausage! A bratwurst! A hamburger! A hot dog! A shish-kabob!"
"Like I said, don't worry!" said the virtual Mr. Wonka, flicking his fingers. A virtual Oompa-Loompa came up to him.
"Please take Mrs. Trout down to the factory incinerator, to fish her husband and son out of it." the virtual Mr. Wonka told the virtual Oompa-Loompa, and shaking Mrs. Trout warmly by the hand. "Bye, Mrs. Trout! It was nice meeting you!"
A few seconds later, everyone heard drums beginning to beat, and virtual Oompa-Loompas began to sing:
"Four little children, already happy and free.
But still they keep on going away, and now there's only three."
A short pause was heard, than they began to sing again:
"Oompa-Loompa doompadee doo!
We have a perfect puzzle for you.
Oompa-Loompa doompadee dee!
If you are wise, you'll listen to me!
What do you get when you frown all day?
Whining and not going outside to play?
Using your brain to make others look weird
Is a habit to be feared!
Please, try to be considerate!
Oompa-Loompa doompadee da!
If you are cheerful, you will go far!
You will live in happiness too,
Like the Oompa-Loompa doompadee doo!"
The screen faded to black, then showing the words: "THIS HAS NOW BEEN HACKED BY MIKE TEAVEE!"
Everyone was shocked.
"PS," the words continued, "SAY HI TO BILLY, MAGGIE, AND FISHFACE FOR ME. AND CHECK THE TC, BY THE WAY".
"The Television Chocolate!" cried Mr. Wonka. "Hurry!"
Everyone ran to the Television Chocolate set. Marvin and his father were seen there, extremely tiny and covered in slime. Suddenly, as fast as they appeared, they disappeared.
"Hurry!" cried Mr. Wonka. "Mike must be messing with the signal!"
"Right you are," said a voice from behind them. They saw…. Mike Teavee! He was completely back to normal, and he was holding a computer in his hand.
"Hey!" cried Mr. Wonka. "How did you get in here?!"
"You did say I could come back to this factory," he responded, showing his Golden Ticket.
"Why did you do this?!" cried Charlie Bucket.
"I did it to help them," said Mike Teavee. "They need to learn a lesson, just like I did. Ever since that day, I do watch television sometimes, maybe as like a movie with my family or something like that. Too much of a good thing is bad, even television and books. Ever since I saw Marvin Trout on TV, I knew that he would get eliminated in a way similar to what happened to me. Now, let's get back to the Virtual Reality system, shall we? I reprogrammed the signal to send them back there."
Everyone ran back to the Virtual Reality system. Marvin and his father were small and covered in slime. They looked absolutely miserable! Now, they were transferred into a Western-style video game! Everything in there was scaled down to their size.
Suddenly, a virtual cowboy was staring at Marvin and his father.
"Yeehaw!" exclaimed the virtual cowboy. "Well, lookie here! We got a ourselves a couple'a nosy lil' varmints, don't we? Hahaha! It seems like I'll havta dispose'a you two!"
He took out a pistol, then laughed crazily. He shot it! Instead of shooting out a bullet, it shot out a red laser, like the one in the robot demonstration. It hit Mr. Trout, and he disappeared.
"NO!" cried Marvin. He tried to run away. He ran to a stable and even got on a horse!
"Giddyup, boy!" cried Marvin, snapping the horse's reins. They were off!
"You can't escape from me!" laughed the cowboy maniacally.
Suddenly, Marvin got tossed off of his horse and landed in a water trough.
"Hahaha!" laughed the cowboy crazily. "I'll catch you, otherwise, my name ain't Crazy Pete!"
He took out his pistol… laughed maniacally… Marvin had a fearful look on his face... The laser came out… and Marvin disappeared, and the screen turned black, with the words: "GAME OVER".
"Where have they gone?!" screamed Mrs. Trout.
"Why, the Digital Realm, of course," said Mr. Wonka. "That's where the data that isn't being used in a game is stored. My Oompa-Loompas will have to program him out."
"Will they ever go back to normal?!" screamed Mrs. Trout.
"No one ever goes back to normal after being on TV and virtual reality," said Mr. Wonka. "It's a well-known fact."
Mr. Wonka flicked his fingers three times, click-click-click, and up came an Oompa-Loompa.
"I would like you to use all of your coding expertise to program Mr. Trout and his son out of the Digital Realm," Mr. Wonka told the real-life Oompa-Loompa. "Maybe Mike could help you as well."
"He's gone!" exclaimed Veruca Perr suddenly. "Mike's gone!"
It was true.
"Well, I guess that his job was done," said Charlie Bucket, sighing. "He undoubtedly taught the Trout family one huge lesson- too much of a good thing, is not a good thing- even books."
A few seconds later, drums were heard banging from throughout the entire room.
"There they go again!" cried Mr. Wonka. "You can't stop them from singing!"
The three remaining children, Emma P. Perr, Adam Wood, and Alexis Williams, stood in the middle of the Virtual Reality Testing Room, listening to the (real-life) Oompa- Loompas singing. This is what they sang:
"Three rousing cheers! Hip-hip-hooray!
We've carted Marvin Trout away!
And incidentally, as we thought
That in a case like this we ought
To see the thing completely through,
We've polished off his father, too.
(We hate to boast about our group,
But don't you think it's super-doop
To get entirely on our own
Two birds but with a single stone,
Two Trout-birds with a single shot?
It makes things quicker, does it not?)
And now the Trout-wife, Mrs. Trout
Is led away, and without a doubt,
Is wondering what happened to her family pair,
Especially the son and heir.
They've gotten trapped in the Digital Realm,
Be sure, Trout family, to not overwhelm
Yourselves, because Marvin never read for pleasure, never for fun.
Oh, Marvin Trout! This barbaric Hun!
He only read to make himself look smart.
We're so glad that he's gone now! Bye-bye, Marvin! Let us part!
He only read to make us look dumb,
And now, while he's in the Digital Realm, his brain will go completely numb!
But don't, my dear friends, look all confused,
His brain will still be in mint condition cause it's never been used!
He never used it to help, only to hurt.
Now, watch as he bites the dirt!
Watch as Marvin and his father stay trapped in the Realm forever!
When will we get them out? Never!"
"How amazing!" clapped Mr. Wonka. "Just as good as always! Now, shall we move on?"