Kingdom Crazies
Ch.25 The Blood Thirsty Tin Man
Sora: Okay, which button turns the light back on?
Riku: How am I suppose to know?
Sora:...I don't know.
Riku:...
Me: Guys, I would like to warn you that, when it gets too dark for awhile, the mole monsters like to feed at this time in the ceiling.
Sora and Riku:...00
(both hear heavy breathing)
AndromedaGalaxy:...Oh, sorry! That was me! It got too quiet.
Sora and Riku: Shwoo!
(both then hear growling noises)
AndromedaGalaxy: Now, thats not me.
Me:...Uh oh.
Sora and Riku: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Yuffie, Sora, and Billy Bob (for short) continued to skip along the yellow paved road, when they came across a forest. Standing there stiff, was a rusted tin man.
"Whoa, that peice of metal, sure would look good in my front yard!" Billy Bob protests.
The others just look at him wierdly.
"What?"
Sora walked up to the tin thing. The thing didn't move, but its lips did.
"OIL ME OR I WILL RIP OUT YOUR INTESTANTS!"
"...Okay!" Sora says cheerfully and oils him.
"YES! I CAN MOVE! NOW TO KILL ALL OF YOU WORTHLESS, FLESHY HUMANS! Filled with...BEAUTIFUL BLOOD!"
"..."
"Would you like fries with that?" Billy Bob asks.
"Why yes pl-WAIT! I will NOT be tricked...Are you filled with...BLOOD?"
"Nope, only straw."
"Oh, little boy, come here and let me kill you."
Sora goes toward the tin man, but Yuffie grabs him.
"ARE YOU STUPID?" She yells at Sora.
"Is that a hitorical question?"
"ARGH! Just don't go near that thing!"
"Were looking for their lost friend! And for me a brain! Were going to see the Authoress of Oz!" Billy Bob explains.
"Oz, huh? Well, theres always been something I have longed for, besides ripping the throat out of everyliving thing on Earth and eating their carcuses."
"..."
"A heart!"
The same catchy beat comes on and the tin man begins to sing.
"I like to kill people, and other living things too. But times I get so lonely, I'm rusting, what to do? I wish that I could love. Feel like I can fly above. And not carry a grenade with me. Something everso special. Something to cherish. Something like a shrunkend head, but much better. Even much better, than having everyliving thing bleed to death and PERIIIIIIISH!"
"GULP! Can we go now?" Sora whispers to Yuffie.
Yuffie is just as scared as he is. The tin man continues.
"OOOOOOOOOH! If I only had a heart! Maybe then I will love life! If I only had a heart! And I wouldn't ever stab another one with a knife! Cause I knew it would hurt! OOOOOOOOOOOH! If I only had a heart! IIIIIIIF! IIIIII! ONLEEEEEEEE! HAAAAAAAAAD! AAAAAAA! HEAAAAAAAAAART!"
"Golly that was beautiful." Billy Bob wipes a tear from his eye.
"By the way, my name is Mary." The tin man says.
"MARY? THATS A GIRL'S NAME! HA HA HA HA!" Sora begins to laugh.
"SHUT UP OR I'LL BLOW YOUR FREAKIN HEAD OFF AND FEED IT TO THE HOMELESS!"
Sora got quiet.
"Well, come on! Lets go get me a heart!"
They then all wrap hands and continue to follow the yellow brick road singing "Were off to see the Authoress! The wonderful Authoress of Oz!"
(back to talking with Sora)
Me: GET OUT OF THERE!
(Riku and Sora run out, with some of their clothes torned.)
Me: I'm going in! I know what button to hit!
AndromedaGalaxy: WAIT! Scare the mole monsters off with this! (hands her the banana)
Me: I won't let you guys down!
Riku: GO ALREADY!
(BlueEyedFun goes in)