"This Isn't Goodbye"

WRITTEN BY DAYNE DINNING

-This fanfic follows 2 days on from Back At One

# Disclaimer – I do not own Emmerdale or any of the characters used.

NOTE: This is my last chapter in this series of fanfic; some may not like how it has ended, I apologise. I hope you guys stick around though? There'll be more. Thanks for reading, reviews welcome as always. This chapter will take place over a few days.

"Do you want to take the job or not?" Cain asked. "I can't keep waiting Aaron – he needs an answer ASAP, he needs a good mechanic out there and you're it, it's up to you, just think about it yeah?"

Saturday – 11.30am

Aaron remembered Cain's words. He sighed. Australia? Very far away from everything he'd ever known. This life changing offer had also brought along with it massive problems, did he want to leave? Jackson couldn't go because of the contract, unless of course he forgot that and went with him anyway, and then the question of would he leave Jackson? Came around...well that was no straight away but deep down, still he'd wanted to get away for a long time. His life with Jackson was perfect but on the other hand he needed to concentrate on himself. But there was one person left to speak too before he spoke to Jackson.

It was Saturday morning, Aaron was laying awake, thinking as he looked at Jackson who was sleeping peacefully. His eyes filled up as he sat up slowly and got out of bed. He grabbed some clothes and got dressed, within a few minutes he was writing a note: - At the pub, need to speak to mum x

11.55am

Aaron walked into the heaving pub. Woah...he thought. One of Declan's organised shooting parties for his snobby friends it looked like. Aaron frowned as he made his way to the bar.

"Oh love! Thank god you're here...get behind here now..."

"Oh mum c'mon..."

"Now Aaron" she said as she was pulling a pint. "Alicia's late, she'll be here soon, Diane's away and Marlon's off for the weekend and Moira's not in till later...so now, come on it's not hard!"

"Hmmm...alright then..." he agreed and walked behind the bar and started serving.

12.30pm

Alicia had arrived to work, typically as it started to calm down. Aaron had worked up quite a sweat and had his sleeves rolled up with a tea towel over his shoulder. Chas smirked as she leaned against the doorway going into the back. "You really do look the part...not as bad as you think is it?"

"Err...no not really..." he half smiled.

"Hmm...Ok son...what's up?"

Aaron rubbed his brow with his thumb and his index finger, and then looked back at her. "I need to talk to you...its really important"

Those words hit Chas like a ton of bricks and the lump in her throat was immediate. She coughed to try and clear it. "In the back love" she smiled. They had become so close; she never thought she'd see the day. Chas followed him in and wiped away the tears that were on the brink of falling.

"Ohh this must be important, you'll wear out the floor with all the pacing you're doing..." she was nervous.

Aaron stopped pacing. "Has Cain said anything to you...?" he asked.

Chas looked puzzled. "What about?" she asked.

"Makes a change..." he smiled and sat on the sofa.

"Come on love you're killing me here..." she said as she joined him. "You're ok aren't you? Jackson?"

"Yeah, yeah...we're fine..." Aaron took a deep breath. "I've been given the opportunity of a lifetime, to go to Australia and work over there, but I needed to talk to you before Jackson, I'm confused...I need to concentrate on me"

Chas nodded in agreement.

"I love him, I do...but I don't think he'll be able to go with the contract he signed with Declan...this wasn't planned mum...he's gunna hate me, but why shouldn't I do this? I need a damn good reason for me not to go"

Chas sighed. "I don't begrudge anyone of a fresh start, a change even son but the big question here is Jackson, you yourself know you need to talk to him, maybe it'll work out, I've never experienced long distance relationships but you and Jackson are strong love it could work, try not to think negative towards it all, it might work out okay..."

"I thought the same, when I was lying in bed watching him...when I got up the tears started..."

"Whoa...hang on tears?"

Aaron nodded.

Chas sighed heavily. "Well seems to me you've already made your mind up, you wouldn't have gotten upset otherwise...I know you love Jackson, and I'm gunna feel horrible for saying this because I love him too but you're my son and I have to be honest with you..." she took his hands in hers and looked at him properly. "You have to do what is right – what is best for you"

Aaron nodded with a quivering lip and was simply pulled in for a tight hug by his mum. Her tears fell now.

1.15pm

Aaron placed his two empty pint glasses on the bar and his mother gave him a questioning look. Aaron nodded. "Good luck love" she smiled.

Aaron walked back into the house and Jackson was in the kitchen. "Hey babe" Jackson said. "You ok?"

Aaron nodded. "Sit down a minute please? Need to talk to you"

"Sure" Jackson frowned as he dried his hands.

They both walked into the living room and sat on the sofa facing each other. "What's this about Aaron?" Jackson asked nervously.

Aaron sighed. "I've had a job offer..."

"Oh..." Jackson perked up.

"Yeah...don't get too happy about it though Jackson...seriously"

Jackson frowned. "Why not? Surely it's an upgrade, one of those posh places in town..."

Aaron stood up and walked over to the fireplace and stood facing away from Jackson. He'd gotten this far to telling him, there was no way he could change the subject now. He shook his head. "No...Other side of the world...Sydney..." he sighed.

"What the? How? When? How long?" Jackson just fired questions at him in complete shock.

Aaron sighed. "Monday, if I decide to go, one of Cain's contacts needs a mechanic out there, he asked me, and how long?" Aaron shook his head. "No idea, a year or two maybe"

"You're not are ya? You can't and I can't come..." Jackson's heart broke, Aaron didn't have to say anything, he knew what was coming.

"Is there any way you could?" Aaron asked quietly.

Jackson shook his head.

Aaron dropped his and the tears fell. "I love you Jackson, I really do..."

"Then why are you doing this?" Jackson frowned angrily.

"I NEED to do this, it's simple, I can't keep kidding myself or you that I'm getting over whats happened because I'm not, everything is a constant reminder of all the bad things that's happened in my life, if i don't do this now then I'll forever be living in a nightmare, you're the only good thing about this place, about me...it could work...we can get webcams, talk all the time"

"Time difference is a bit of a problem" Jackson snapped then he realised. "You stopped going didn't you?"

"My choice Jackson, wasn't doing a thing...and obviously we'd have to compromise Jackson" Aaron was sad, he knew this would happen but wasn't quite prepared.

"Oh yeah!" Jackson laughed. "Like you are?" He would bring up the counselling again later, he was NOT happy about that.

Aaron sighed. "This isn't an easy decision you know"

"Obviously it was, because you've decided already I can tell"

"You're my life Jackson, the reason I get up on a morning, if it wasn't for you I wouldn't even be alive right now, you've saved me from so many things, do you really think I'd give up on us now, it's been breaking my heart the last few days, I didn't know how to tell ya"

Jackson shook his head and turned it away. Crying. "You should have tried harder Aaron, the reason you're going is because you're still a mess, as far as I knew, you were still going to the sessions, things were looking up for us, I'm not a psychic...no sorry, I know you wouldn't forget but at least to the point of where it doesn't affect you" Jackson stood up, grabbed the Paris tickets and held them in frustration until he raised them up and tore it into small bits much to Aaron's shock. "You wanna go to Australia? Fucking go then! This is us!" he flung the teared up pieces of card and envelope at Aaron and they fell to the floor, shattered, a mere form of what they previously were. Jackson turned quickly and stormed out.

"Jackson!" he called after him, crying. "It doesn't have to be like this!"

Saturday 11.30pm

The door slammed shut and footsteps ran up the stairs. Aaron was in the bedroom with his bag laid out on the bed, half full of all of his clothes and a few photographs. Jackson burst into the room and grabbed the piles of clothes out of his bag and walked to put them back. Aaron grabbed him. "What the hell are you doing, you haven't given a toss since I told ya? Why you bothering now?"

Jackson's eyes were red and glazed; it was obvious he'd been crying. "You're not leaving Aaron"

"Yes I' am, my career is on the up, I don't wanna be a mechanic in a tiny village for the rest of my life, and I just need to get away from this place" he said with frustration as he threw the clothes back into his bag. "Nothing helps, what the counsellor says, what you say, what my mum says...Paddy, Adam...NOTHING...I need to do it my way, please Jackson, just let me do it my way, I'm not doing this to hurt you or tear us apart, I love you for god sake...I still wanna be with you, so much"

"How can you be with me from the other side of the world Aaron?" he yelled. "You can't kiss me, you can't touch me Aaron, how is THAT being with me? Might aswell be on another planet" he raged.

"What part of I love you, don't you understand?" Aaron asked.

"Love me? Yeah right..."

Aaron scowled and pushed him up against the wall, pinning him up by his arms and forcefully kissed him...

Sunday 2.00pm

Adam found Aaron at the cricket pavilion; he walked up to him with a slight smile and joined him on the steps. "Your mum told me, so you don't need to explain, I'm happy for ya mate"

Aaron smiled and looked at his best friend. "I'm glad someone is"

"Jack-" Adam didn't get to finish.

"Jackson isn't speaking to me at all..."

"Ahh he'll come round, he's stubborn like you, and it's not like you're gunna be gone forever..."

A thoughtful silence came over them. "I'll miss ya mate" Aaron spoke quietly.

Adam placed his arm around his shoulders. "Me too" he smiled.

"Thanks for always being there...and you know what I mean" Aaron smiled with teary eyes.

Adam knew what he meant and nodded. "It's alright...Don't get soppy on me now mate" he chuckled. "Ahhh come here" he pulled his friend into a hug. "Be safe out there right?"

Aaron nodded and returned his hug. He was pleased he got this chance alone, because it wouldn't happen when he was leaving, not in front of everyone.

Monday 10am

Aaron was showered and dressed, his bags were in the living room, and everyone was downstairs except him and Jackson. "I hope that one day you'll forgive me Jackson, just please and try and understand. I've gotta go now...I love you so much, whether you wanna believe that or not I do...bye babe" he smiled as he took one last look at him. Then he broke down as he left the room and walked back down the stairs, walking into the room and immediately being pulled into a hug by his mum, who was really upset aswell.

"He hates me..."

"We'll look after him Aaron..." Chas said and then opened the front door. "Taxi's here..."

"This is me then..." he smiled as he looked at Paddy, his mum, Adam and Hazel.

He walked out the door and they followed him. He handed his bag to the taxi driver who put them in the boot.

"Oh come here you" Chas said again. "You need to call me as soon as you get there no excuses, and then at least twice a week afterwards, I mean it, you're my boy and I need to know you're ok"

Aaron nodded. "I will"

Hazel walked over to him. "Jackson will come round Aaron, like your mum said, we'll look after him" she smiled and hugged him. "Put yourself right love" she whispered. They pulled away and Aaron was so choked he could not speak, just simply nodded.

Adam didn't say a word either; he just smiled at him and gave him a slight nod.

Paddy stepped closer. "Take care of yourself...son" tears fell from his eyes and Aaron quickly flung himself into his arms.

"Thankyou for everything"

"Always Aaron" Paddy whispered.

Chas was uncontrollable now; her hand covered her mouth as she sobbed.

Aaron stepped away from them all. "I'll see you soon" he smiled.

Jackson ran out of the front door. "No, wait..."he walked right up to Aaron. "Please don't go babe"

"I've got too Jackson" Aaron shrugged. "We had a good run didn't we?" he cried more at those words and rested his head on Jackson's chest. "Please forgive me..."

"This isn't goodbye" Jackson lifted Aaron's head up. "I love you, with all my heart"

"I love you too, and I'm sorry..."

Jackson leaned closer and kissed him with such passion that even the others felt it. The kiss ceased and both men looked at each other. "I'll be here when you're ready" Jackson cried silently as he spoke those words.

Aaron nodded as he cried, he stepped away and took what would be his final glance at his family and friends for a while and smiled. "Don't cry mum..."

That obviously didn't help and she cried more wrapped in Paddy's arms, a sight Aaron had wanted to see again for a long time. He took a final look around the village, sighed with mixed feelings and opened the door to the taxi and got inside.

It began to drive away and Aaron looked out of the back window as tears streamed down his face.

All of them stayed there until the taxi was no longer in view. They were going to miss him so, so much. To the point it hurt, for one in particular; Jackson.