A/N: Sorry about the late post. I have four or five almost but not quite completed stories and I had a project due this morning, so, sorry.
Back in Chapter 8, Steve told Sam he and Bucky only had one conversation. So, naturally, I keep thinking of more conversations. So, to save my bacon, what Steve meant was that he and Bucky had only had one conversation where they weren't on the run or prepping for a mission and where Bucky hadn't decided to go into the freezer again. Only one unstressful, normal, buddy-to-buddy conversation. Which isn't this one, by the way. I haven't written that one, because I feel the angst.

Habitual Criminal

Bucky knew the serum guaranteed Steve would recover fast, not only from physical injuries but from mental anguish and stress, too. But that mental toughness didn't mean that Steve couldn't get low.

"I'm sorry, Steve, but I've got to do it."

"I know, Buck. I understand and I'd never try to stop you from doing what you think is right. It's just ..."

"What?"

"I've made a mess of everything," Steve confessed. "And now I won't even have you to help me out of it. I never intended to break the law, you know."

"Liar," Bucky said fondly. "You're a habitual criminal, Rogers. How many back alley brawls did you get into? How many false names did you use to try to enlist? That could have landed you in the federal pen, pal. And how about your disobeying orders to get the boys and me out of that Hydra prison? Steve Rogers, habitual criminal."

"You can't tell me you didn't intend to defy the Accords," Bucky said. "It's not in you to sit by and let others suffer."

Steve chuckled. "When you put it like that ..." Then his face fell and he sighed. "But I didn't intend to drag everyone down with me. Sam, Wanda Clint and Scott are all in prison because of me."

"What was your plan?"

"Didn't have one. I was blindsided by the Accords. Kinda thought Tony and Pepper were keeping an eye on the politics, but they had other problems. When I heard about the "sign it or retire" clause, I didn't have any time to plan. Peggy died and my mind was on the funeral and one the past — all my regrets and might-have-beens. Then the bombing happened on the day of the funeral and all I could do was react."

"You should have stayed out of it, Steve," Bucky said honestly, though he knew Steve to well to think that was possible.

"I couldn't. I just lost Peggy, I couldn't lose you, too," Steve confessed in a choked voice.

"What would you have done if I hadn't been involved? If Zemo had kept his fingers out of the pie and the UN didn't get bombed?"

"Not get into a fight with a bunch of cops, destroy a major highway and trash an airport," Steve affirmed. "I guess I'd have started with something small — stop a bank robbery, rescue people from a burning building. Invoke the Good Samaritan laws if they challenged me. Bring the Accords to a trial of public opinion. Go to jail for civil disobedience if I had to. Not this. Not me in hiding in a foreign country and my friends in maximum security."

"I'm sorry you got into this mess because of me," Bucky said sadly.

"I'm not," Steve said firmly. "That's the one thing I'm not sorry about. I'm sorry Tony and I never learned how to have a real conversation. I'm sorry I didn't see through Zemo's plot. I'm sorry I got Sam and Clint and Wanda and Scott involved. But I'm not sorry I rescued you. I'm not sorry I kept you from being murdered. I couldn't let them shoot you down with no trial and no evidence. Shoot on sight based on a blurry video! Even if you were guilty, a kill on sight order is wrong."

"But I am guilty, Steve. Not of the UN bombing, but of so many other atrocities."

"I'll tell you again, that wasn't you," Steve insisted. "The fact that you regret what happened proves that you were not in your right mind when you were the Winter Soldier."

"I don't think you could ever prove that," Bucky said sadly. "I'm a murderer and I deserve to be punished."

"Is that why you're doing this? Putting yourself in a cryo-prison?" Steve demanded.

"Maybe. It's part of it, but I hate that I can't control my own mind. A couple of words from Zemo and I was his attack dog. I've tried to kill you twice, Steve. I could never face myself again if I succeeded. Just put me in the freezer and forget about me. There's no hope for Bucky Barnes. People will always only see the assassin, the Winter Soldier. Look at Stark."

Steve couldn't think about Tony right now. Instead he said, "There's always a chance, Bucky. I've done some research about brainwashing and temporary insanity. I'm pretty sure there's enough film and documents to show that you were not responsible for your actions. That other people tortured you and controlled you. You were incapable to knowing what you did was wrong then. That's the very definition of temporary insanity.

"When a party successfully defends criminal charges on a ground of insanity, the consequences vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. Usually, the defendant is committed to a mental institution," Steve quoted from an online legal dictionary.

"I'd still be locked up, maybe for my whole life," Bucky said dryly. Because he'd done research, too. He thought he'd found the same online source and quoted the passage that came after, "When a party successfully defends criminal charges on a ground of insanity, the consequences vary from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. Usually, the defendant is committed to a mental institution. On the average, a defendant found not guilty by reason of insanity and committed to a mental institution is confined for twice as long as is a defendant who is found guilty and sent to prison. Very few acquitted insanity defendants are given supervised release, and even fewer are released directly following their verdict."

"Maybe, but if the experts at the mental institution found you sane, you could be out in as little as six months," Steve said. "Depending on what state the trial was in. And," he said with mock thoughtfulness. "Depending on whether you could ever convince someone you aren't crazy."

Bucky slugged Steve. "If I'm crazy, it's because you drove me crazy, Rogers!"

They shoved at each other in brotherly fashion for a moment, then Bucky backed off. He began to have second thoughts about the whole matter. Going into cryo felt right to him. It felt like penance. It felt like safety. But that was just for him.

When he looked at it from Steve's point of view, it felt like abandonment and grief. That was no way to treat his brother.

"Maybe I'm giving up too soon," he said hesitantly.

Steve immediately recognized what his friend was doing and protested Bucky's unselfish sacrifice just as he had done when young Bucky gave up things he liked to do to be with his sickly friend.

Steve gripped his pal's shoulder. "No. Don't do that, Buck. Not for my sake. You want this, right?"

"Yeah," Bucky confessed in a quiet voice. "I can't bear to hurt anyone else. I just can't. Especially not you. I'd feel safer if I can go into cryo. I found out by accident that they have the technology here. And, it felt like the right thing to do."

Steve squeezed Bucky's shoulder in comfort. "Then you do what you need to do, pal. I'll be fine. At least I'll know you're staying out of trouble," he joked weakly.

"Punk."

"Jerk."

"I mean it, Buck. It's past time you get to do what you want to do. I'm not selfish enough to stand in your way."

Decision made, Bucky relaxed. "You never were, Steve," he thought. "You never were."

A/N: Of course, Steve is being super optimistic about the 6 months sentence, but this is from the legal dictionary on free dictionary dot com:
The procedural framework in Massachusetts illustrates the consequences that come with the insanity defense. Under chapter 123, section 16, of the Massachusetts General Laws Annotated, the court may order a person found not guilty by reason of insanity (an insanity acquittee) to be hospitalized for 40 days for observation and examination. During this period, the district attorney or the superintendent of the mental hospital may petition the court to have the insanity acquittee committed to the hospital. If the judge orders the commitment, the acquittee is placed in the hospital for six months.
After the first six months have expired, the commitment is reviewed again, and then once a year thereafter. If the superintendent of the mental health facility moves to discharge the acquittee, the district attorney must respond with any objections within 30 days of notice from the superintendent. The mental health facility is authorized to restrict the movement of criminal defendants and insanity acquittees, so a commitment is tantamount to incarceration.