Chapter 25
"Hey Dad," Luke greeted even as he allowed himself to get lost in his father's embrace. It was almost surreal being in the farmhouse kitchen after all this time. Six months felt like six years, and he vowed never to let so much time passed before he visited his family again.
"I'm glad you could come," Holden replied patting his son on the back, and holding him for a long moment before pulling away. "Hey Reid, welcome to the farm. Feel free to make yourself comfortable. Would you like me to take the munchkin off your hands?"
"You can have him," Reid said handing the baby over to his grandfather. "I think he needs a diaper change anyway." Luke hid a smile as his dad headed out of the room with Landon and the diaper bag in hand. "I probably shouldn't have said that," Reid mumbled, running his fingers through his short cropped curls. "You're dad probably thinks I'm an ass."
"Since when did you start caring what people think?" Luke asked slightly amused.
"I don't," Reid insisted. "This isn't just anyone though, it's your family."
"And you need to relax and be yourself."
"Just remember that you said that," Reid sighed, turning at the sound of the screen door opening. His nephew appeared in the doorway, smiling as he entered carrying a covered dish.
"Where do you want me to set this, Luke?" Laurie asked stepping further into the kitchen with them.
"Just put it on the counter for now," Luke replied. "Then you can show your uncle around for me."
"Okay." Laurie placed the food down and turned beckoning for Reid to follow behind him. Luke watched them disappear into the parlor and sighed at the rare moment of silence that presented itself. There were things about this room that never failed to remind him of Noah…but tonight, and much to his surprise, that wasn't what he was focusing on. As he walked over to the simmering pots on the stove he couldn't help but think of all the time he spent in this place over the years. This had been his refuge when his parents were having their all out wars; surrounded by good food and the warmth and comfort that came with family.
As he looked into the pots, stirring occasionally and resisting the urge to sample, he realized how much he missed his grandma and her warm, comforting embrace. He wanted his son to know her, and he wanted him to love the farm as much as he did. A smile touched his lips as he inhaled the aroma of freshly baked pies and brownies, and in that second he decided he would spend as much time with his grandma as he could
"I hope you weren't planning on sneaking a taste," a gentle yet stern voice met his ears causing him to laugh as he turned to face the woman in front of him. To look at Emma Snyder no one would ever guess that she had been in the hospital almost two years prior. She was still pleasantly plump and her cheeks were flush with a healthy glow. If she had her way she would still be moving about, cooking for every occasion as well as the chores that came with maintaining a farm. However her family had put their foot down, and insisted that she cut back. They had come close to losing her once, and quite frankly none of them were ready to go through that again.
Luke wrapped his arms around her, burying his face in her curly hair as he settled into her warm embrace. Hugs from his grandma were always welcome and comforting, he had missed her. "I didn't sneak a taste this time," he said when he pulled out of her arms. "It's good to see you Grandma. I'm sorry I haven't been around much."
"Oh don't you worry about that," Emma said waving him off as she moved over to the stove. "I know these past few months have been hard for you dear. I can remember when your grandfather died…I was a mess. I remembered though that I had children to take care of…they came first and foremost. I trust that is what you have been doing for your little one as well?"
"Yes and the big one too," Luke laughed as he watched his grandmother move around the kitchen. "Having Reid around has been a lot of help as well. I can't wait for you to meet him, if you haven't already."
"I think I saw him on my way in here. He's a handsome one, Luke."
"Grandma," Luke shook his head, sure that a slight blush stained his cheeks. "It's not like that. I'm nowhere near ready to be thinking about dating again. Reid's a good friend, and Landon seems to like him a lot too."
Emma gave him a knowing look as she patted his cheek, but she let the subject drop and instead asked him how his writing was going. She had heard from Holden that he was planning to write a new novel, and she wanted to hear all about it.
By the time Reid and Laurie returned to the kitchen other family members had filtered into the house, and Luke was sitting at the table between Natalie and Ethan who were telling him about the field trip they were fixing to take with the summer camp group they were in.
"My god, Luke, I knew you family was big; but you didn't tell me the whole army would be here today." Reid said feeling just a tad bit overwhelmed.
"Just breathe, Uncle Reid. It will be okay," Laurie said patting his uncle on the shoulder.
"You know most of the people here," Luke pointed out softly. "We'll introduce you to who you don't know, and you can sit between me and Laurie at the table if that will help."
"Can I sit next to Reid," Ethan asked joining the conversation.
"That's up to him," Luke said turning to take Landon from his father's arms.
Reid looked at Luke who offered him an encouraging nod, before turning his attention to Ethan. "I take it you still want to have our talk?" Ethan nodded, his gaze serious as he looked up at Reid.
"Then I would be honored to sit beside you, Ethan," he said placing his hand on the little boy's shoulder. "Come on, let's find our seats so that we're at the beginning of the food line."
Luke shook his head, smiling as he bounced Landon on his hip. His son, who had been passed around to everyone from his grandfather to his aunt Natalie, was now looking around the room with his fist in his mouth wondering what was going to happen next. Luke could tell that his son was enchanted by his surroundings, those blue eyes gleamed with something akin to wonder as he took in all the familiar faces and the strangers.
As everyone settled down Reid took a moment to familiarize himself with all the faces. Luke as promised was sitting to his right, with Landon beside him in his high chair. Laurie took the seat beside his brother, which put him directly across from Robbie who was sitting between Lucas and James' father, the elder Dr. McPherson. Faith sat beside Laurie, with her cousin Sage beside her. Natalie sat between her grandparents, with her aunt Meg, and Meg's daughter Eliza rounding out that end of the table. Carly was directly across from Eliza with Jack and their son Parker sitting to her left. Holden was beside Ethan, with Emma at the head of the table, and the last member of the party was Charlene, Emma's granddaughter. It was enough information to make Reid's head swim.
At Emma's behest everyone joined hands. Reid watched as Laurie and Luke took Landon's hands into theirs and he couldn't help but smile at the gesture. He felt a tingle as Luke's fingers brushed against him, encasing his hand in warmth. He didn't have time to think about what he was feeling as he felt Ethan's smaller hand take hold of his free one. He spared a glance and a smile for Luke's little brother before lowering his head.
"So Reid," Holden said rescuing their guest from the barrage of questions Ethan was throwing his way. Though he could tell that Reid was graciously answering them, he sensed that a change of subject was in order. "It's been a while since we've talked. How are things going at the hospital?"
"Not too bad," Reid shrugged, taking a bite of his mashed potatoes. "I mean unless you count the fact that half of the staff is incompetent, and the doctors don't tend to know what they're doing. Present company excluded of course," he added glancing at James and his father who wore bemused expressions on their faces. "Dr. Hughes is a great chief of staff, don't get me wrong, but I think it might be time for him to step down. He's very sharp and intuitive, but he's not as quick about things as I am sure he used to be. And the nurses, I don't even want to get started on them. Nurse Parsons had me paged because she said the patient was experiencing some discomfort. When I got to the room the patent in question was asleep, and his vitals were fine. I was right in the middle of an important meeting with Bob about the Neurological wing we want to build. IT's going to be equipped with state of the art equipment, top of the line and innovative. There won't be another place like it in the Midwest or anywhere if I have anything to say about it. I'm really excited about this project," Reid stated breathlessly, gazing around the room before locking gazes with Luke. "What?" He asked innocently.
Luke shook his head, a smile crossing his lips as he leaned close to Reid's ear. "I've never heard you ramble like that before."
"Oh," Reid said with uncertainty. "Does…does that embarrass you?"
"Not at all," Luke replied with a casual shrug of his shoulder before eating the forkful of potatoes he had suspended in air as he listened to Reid.
"I think they need to change coffee providers too," Reid added after a moment's pause. "The coffee in the break room is horrible."
"That's why we always migrate to Java," James remarked.
"You could always just make coffee at home you know," Luke piped up. He was highly amused at the direction the conversation had gone."
"It would be fine if the incompetents who brewed it knew what they were doing," Reid said shaking his head as he cut into another slice of beef.
"I'll have a word with the board about it," Lucinda said decisively as she dabbed at her mouth with a napkin. "I honestly don't think the coffeemaker has been changed since you were a child, Luke."
"I think hospital coffee isn't meant to be appetizing," Luke commented reaching for his glass of water. "At least that's always been my experience."
"Are you guys really sitting here talking about coffee?" Laurie chimed in as he reached for the green beans to pass to Faith.
"Stimulating conversation, Laurence," Reid quipped.
Laurie shook his head and returned his attention to his own conversation. Luke smiled and continued to eat while simultaneously feeding Landon his mashed potatoes and carrots. The baby caught everyone's attention when he stuck his hand into his potatoes and brought his fingers to his mouth.
"Trying to feed yourself already, little man?" Luke chuckled as he wiped Landon's fingers with a wet cloth. The baby giggled, causing a chain reaction around the table starting with Luke who blew a raspberry in his baby's face causing him to giggle more. Laughter and conversation filled the room as dinner continued. Lucinda asked Laurie and Robbie if they were prepared for school, and offered her assistance for anything they might need to make the transition as seamless as possible.
Reid complimented Emma on her cooking and insisted that she needed to give Luke the recipe for the meal.
"He already knows how to make it," Emma stated proudly as she looked at her grandson. "Luke is quite the chef, stick around long enough and I guarantee you won't be disappointed."
"Grandma," Luke exclaimed indignantly, though Reid didn't miss the blush that stained his cheeks.
"Mama taught him everything he knows," Holden added proudly. "Does he cook for you often, Reid?"
"Sometimes I make him stop and we just have takeout," Reid replied. "He's doing things around the house all day, it's not fair for him to have to cook for me too."
"I'm sitting here," Luke reminded them as he spooned more potatoes into his baby's mouth.
"Hush you," Emma chuckled lightly. "We're just all so glad to have you here, we have to talk about you."
"Oh is that how it works," Luke smirked. "I stand corrected, continue as you must."
Reid hid a smile behind his glass and watched the people talking around him. As he listened to the incessant chatter he realized that he didn't mind these people at all. He was able to answer questions with ease, and he enjoyed hearing the sound of Luke's laughter. It was good to see him having fun for a change. He could understand the family all vying for his attention and just reveling in the fact that he was in their presence again. It was more than apparent that they had all missed him a great deal.
"Are we too late?" a new voice joined the already full chorus and Reid glanced up to see a petite woman who looked familiar, standing beside a man who bore a striking resemblance to Holden.
"Hey big brother," Luke said standing to give the man a hug.
"Luke, it's good to see you," the man replied hugging Luke close. "You look good," he said stepping back to look in to his eyes. "How are you doing?"
"I'm good," Luke replied happily. "Hey Ali, glad you could make it."
"The same could be said for you," Alison replied giving Luke a hug herself before stepping back.
"That's why I know that face," Reid exclaimed as it occurred to him who the woman was. "You're Nurse Stewart."
"Dr. Oliver," Alison smiled despite her surprise. "I didn't know you'd be here?"
"He came with me," Luke explained. "Reid, I want you to meet my brother Aaron. Of course you already know Alison, his wife."
"Hey man nice to meet you," Aaron said offering Reid his hand. "Alison speaks very highly of you."
"She does?" Reid asked even as he accepted Aaron's hand to shake. "Somehow I find that hard to believe. I think the nurses are conspiring against me."
Landon chose that moment to cry out when he realized that Luke wasn't in his line of vision anymore. Luke quickly moved back to the table and scooped Landon into his arms. "I'm right here, baby," he said patting Landon's back. Instantly he was quiet and content again, looking around at the newcomers before waving at Alison who smiled and waved back.
"You guys are just in time for dessert," Emma said standing to fix plates for her grandchildren. The kids were excused from the table to make room for Alison and Aaron, and the chatter continued with them filling everyone in on their day. Reid felt like he got to know a little bit about every member of Luke's family that night, and even picked up some insight on those who weren't there. When Carly inadvertently brought up Lily while discussing her latest fashion venture a cold chill seemed to enter the room and the smile that had dominated Luke's features turned into a frown.
The subject was changed quickly enough, and Luke's smile returned as they had dessert and moved their conversation into the parlor. Robbie and Laurie had retreated with Faith, Parker and the kids up to one of the bedrooms to play video games. It was just starting to get dark when Reid noticed that Luke was growing weary. He was bouncing Landon on his knee, but the movement was doing nothing to calm the baby down. Reid excused himself from the conversation he was having with Holden and settled down next to Luke, quickly extracting the baby from his grasp. It didn't take him long to quiet the infant down, and Luke looked like he really wanted to bow out, but Reid had a feeling that he wouldn't. He figured it had to be hard for him, being the center of everyone's attention. While it was nice to be loved by so many, this was the first time in a while that Luke was venturing out and it was far too easy to get overloaded.
"Oh," Reid said looking down at his watch, his frown set, it's getting late and I have early rounds tomorrow." He looked up, his gaze locking with Luke's grateful one, his words focused on everyone in the room. "It's been a great evening, and I thank you all for your hospitality. We'll have to do it again sometime."
"It's been a pleasure having you here, Dr. Oliver," Emma said clasping her hands together as her grandson and his guest stood to leave.
"Please call me Reid," he replied kissing her on the cheek. "It was a pleasure meeting you all."
Luke kissed his grandmother on the cheek and shared a hug with his dad before following behind Reid. He stopped in the doorway to look at his family once more. He offered them a tired smile and silent thanks before disappearing into the kitchen.
"You feeling better?"
Luke looked up from the wriggling baby to the man who was standing in his doorway. Reid was leaning against the doorframe with one arm crossing his chest while the other carried a cookie he had confiscated from Emma's kitchen. "I am. Thanks," he said smiling before turning his attention to Landon who was resisting Luke's efforts to change his diaper. "Did you have fun tonight?"
"It was alright," Reid said through a mouthful of cookie. "Your family can be a bit overwhelming."
"Tell me about it," Luke said leaning down to blow raspberries at the baby's stomach. Landon let out a squeal as he kicked his legs up and down on the bed.
"So the lady who was sitting next to Emma…is that Noah's mom?"
"Yes," Luke replied as his baby turned his head towards Reid's voice. "She isn't around much really, and I honestly don't know if I would have gone if I had known she'd be there tonight."
"You two not on speaking terms?" Reid asked curiously.
Landon laughed again as Luke tickled his belly, leaning down to give him a sloppy kiss before once again looking at Reid. "Do you want to come in?" He asked gesturing for him to enter. "I'm not trying to change the subject or anything…just don't want to have this conversation with you in the hallway."
Reid hesitated for a second, very aware of the fact that this was the first time Luke was inviting him into his room. He watched Luke's face skeptically before taking the first tentative steps inside. "You're sure?" he said even as he neared Luke's bed.
"Yes," Luke said sincerely. He secured Landon's diaper just in time for the little tyke to turn over on his hands and knees reaching for Reid as he tried to crawl towards him. "Lan wants you to stay too."
"I see that," Reid said scooping the baby into his arms. "Is it okay if I sit?" Luke nodded, patting the spot beside him. Reid settled down, placing the baby on his lap while Luke excused himself for a minute to dispose of the dirty diaper.
"You really do have a photographic memory don't you?" Luke asked awed.
"It came in handy in medical school," Reid replied his attention focused on Landon who was touching his face with his small fingers. He pretended to nibble at the small digits, causing Landon to snatch his hand away giggling all the while. "What makes you say that?" he asked turning his attention to Luke who was putting a glass of water on the inn table.
"I've only mentioned her to you once," Luke pointed out…and I don't really talk about her at all. I prefer not to actually."
"So she's not really someone you want around Landon?"
"I'm not sure how to explain this without sounding harsh," Luke frowned thoughtfully.
"I won't judge your decisions, Luke."
"Well I just want him to be surrounded by people who I know are going to be there for him."
"Makes sense to me."
"I told you how we found Noah's mom right?" Reid nodded as he bounced the baby on his knee. Landon for his credit was trying to hold on to Reid's shirt while glancing back and forth between the two men. "Well when everything broke, Noah and his mom had a falling out. And I explained to her that it would be up to him to come to her if he wanted to speak to her again."
"Why were they fighting?"
"Built up resentment," Luke explained. "It was a delayed reaction to her leaving him all those years ago. That single act shaped Noah's world for a long time, and quite frankly it was selfish. I mean I can't pretend to know what she was thinking at the time or why she did what she did…but I know for me that if I had to pick up and run from a situation right now, Lan would be with me. He comes first always."
"And that's exactly why you're a good parent," Reid bumped their shoulders together offering Luke a smile.
"Thank you," Luke returned the smile gratefully. "I'd like to think I'm doing right by him. I want to surround him with people he can count on. When he gets older he'll make his own decisions about who he wants to talk to, but right now…you know what I mean right?"
"You want to protect him as much as you can from people who might let him down…who might leave."
"Yeah," Luke's voice was soft as he reached out a hand to touch his son's soft blond hair. Landon turned his attention to Luke, flashing his smile, showing no sign of the weariness he had exhibited earlier. "I guess I don't understand how you can abandon a child. He let his hand fall from Landon's head, and moved to sit back against his headboard his legs tucked beneath him. "I know what it's like to abandoned, and if I have anything to say about it Landon will not know what that feels like."
"What happened, Luke?" Reid asked gently. He kissed the top of Landon's head and laid him down on his lap. His hand started running soothing circles on the baby's back as he tried to lull him to sleep.
"Well five years ago was the first big fight."
"Just after your ordeal right?"
"Yeah," Luke nodded, his hand idly tracing patterns on his coverlet. "I told her she needed to let Noah come to her. At first she kept her distance. She was working as a flight attendant, so that meant she wasn't around a lot anyway…and whenever we were at the farm she was civil but didn't try to talk to Noah much."
"Okay, sounds good so far. Something changed that though."
"He thought she was dead for sixteen years," Luke explained shaking his head. "And sometimes I think he was better off thinking that." Reid didn't say anything to that. There wasn't anything he could say, and besides that he knew Luke would explain. Luke never said anything without a reason, and he was certain that this was no exception. 'The fact that she was alive screams that she knew what Noah's dad was capable of. So once he got over the initial high of having a mom…he started to realize what that meant., and what happened to me just put him over the edge. He wanted nothing to do with her, and while at first she accepted that…"
"She grew impatient?" Reid asked his voice quieting as he continued to lull Landon to sleep.
"She came to see him, about a year after the initial blow up. Up until that point I had been neutral. I wasn't upset with her…but I wasn't on her side either. I supported his decision and stood by him like I was supposed to."
"Did you agree with him?"
"Well I was the last person who was going to tell him that he should make up with his mother. I certainly didn't want to make up with my own, and he was right, you know? She did leave, and she chose her life over his. Noah never got over that." He fell silent for a moment, his frown set as he thought about the argument that would forever change his relationship with Charlene. "I think she tried too hard," he said thoughtfully. "I believe that she wanted that second chance, she expected one…and she stood here in our home and demanded it."
Luke shook his head and looked down at his hands. The feelings of hurt and utter betrayal he had felt that day came bubbling to the surface threatening to overpower him…but he wouldn't let that happen. He looked up matching gazes with Reid who was still lightly stroking the baby's back with his fist.
"I wasn't home…which now that I think about it is probably why she dared come to the house. I came in on them arguing. Noah was visibly upset…they both were, and that day I saw a side of her that I really didn't think existed. It was a bad day," He sighed shaking his head yet again. "Some people don't realize just how powerful words really are. They're dangerous things…words. If they're used effectively enough they sting, and they can't be taken back. No amount of apology can take them back."
"What words?"
"She told Noah he was just as bad as his father for judging her, and for not giving her a second chance."
"That sounds tame enough," Reid commented even as he winced.
"That was," Luke laughed bitterly. "That was probably the tamest of the conversation. "The kicker was when she asked Noah why he could forgive me for abandoning him, but couldn't find it in his heart to forgive her."
"Ouch."
"It gets worse." Luke moved to pick up the now sleeping baby, placing him in his crib before leaning in to kiss him softly on the cheek. He pulled the blanket over him and patted him on the back before returning to his spot on the bed.
"You never abandoned Noah," Reid pointed out.
"Well I did…but it wasn't by choice or intent."
"Big difference, Luke."
"I told her that," Luke acquiesced, taken aback by how strongly Reid reacted to his admission. "Told her that she wasn't playing fair, and what I did or didn't do was irrelevant anyway. I resented the fact that she pulled me into it because I had tried my hardest to stay out of it."
"How did the argument end?"
"It never ended," Luke shook his head sadly. "It stopped but it was never resolved. I told her to get out, and I told her never to come back. She may be a part of my family by blood…but I don't want her near me or mine." Instinctively his eyes moved to the crib where Landon was fast asleep. Reid scooted backwards until he was beside Luke, his hand reaching out to touch the younger man's shoulder as he too looked at the sleeping baby.
"I should get some sleep," he said after a few minutes of comfortable silence. "I really do have early rounds tomorrow, and you look exhausted."
"Yeah I should sleep too," Luke said shifting to climb into bed. Reid quickly stood adjusting the pillows as Luke slipped under his sheets. He smoothed out the blankets and glanced down at Luke one last time. "Thanks for listening to me tonight," Luke said his voice already laced thickly with sleep.
"Thank you for trusting me," Reid replied bending down to press his lips to Luke's forehead. "Good night, Luke."
"Night," Luke whispered his eyes closing as sleep took over. Reid stood back and watched him for a moment before slipping out of the room, turning off the lights as he went.