CHAPTER 25
AUTHORS NOTE
Well now that at my work I have a few time free I decide to keep writing until I finish, hope my free time doesn't end soon.
Jazz1704.- thank you for your words, I was so happy when I receive your pm. So happy that here Im writing again my dear friend!.
guest: El matrimonio va bien ya cumpli un año y aun no lo mato tonces va bien, y debido al poco trabajo que tengo ahorita creo que estare escribiendo mas seguido... saludos
EMILY POV:
Is been a week training, classes, swimming and training, im so tired I don't have life anymore but I need this. I was eating lunch with Aria.
Aria: Your body is back in shape.
Emily: Do you think so?
Aria: Yeah she is doing a good job my friend.
Emily: Shut up.
Aria: So one more week and then what?
Emily: Swim meet, and final team publication.
Aria: And what do you think are you gonna make it?
Emily: I don't know I haven't swim with the girls so I don't know their times, she keeps everything a mystery.
Aria: Maybe she doesn't want you to know, so you cant push yourself more or overthink.
Emily: Maybe.
Aria: In other topic, do you two what?
Emily: We two what?
Aria: talking? Friends? Friends with benefits? Relationship?
Emily: None. Teacher and student that sometimes talk about life.
Aria: Well Ezra told me he saw Paige happier, I though it was because of you.
Emily: Well not because of me.
Aria: Sorry about that.
Emily: Yeah me too.
I didn't know that information about her, she spend all the time with me, well almost all her time, I don't think she has time for a relationship, I don't have time for a relationship. Maybe I should ask her today.
PAIGE POV:
In one week Emily has gain muscle, speed and condition her times for freestyle are perfect I think she has a spot there, breaststroke got better decent maybe an opportunity there, butterfly got better too maybe small opportunity there and backstroke still little off. Coach Seal told me that each team member should at least be great in two styles of swimming, so this is kind of bad news we only have one more week to get another style ready for competition I don't think is a good idea to train for four styles she needs a least two perfect styles and she will be in and then we can work out the other two, this is the plan for this week, Im pretty sure she wont like it.
Coach Seal: So how is Fields doing? Will she be ready?
Paige: She will, for two events this Saturday I don't think I cant bring her for all, but I think she will be good for the team on those events.
Coach Seal: She was an all style swimmer Paige.
Paige: She is not ready for all style but, she will be she need more time for the other two events.
Coach Seal: Just hope she is good because we have a lot of good swimmers this semester Paige.
Paige: I know Coach, Im working on it.
Of course Im working on it, Im studying every swimmer and competition for Emily and I really think she has a good opportunity of doing it.
Coach Seal: Well is time, one more week Paige, one more week and we will have our final eight.
Paige: Okay one more week.
EMILY POV:
I was so nervous today, because this new information about Paige. That I my time were a lot off.
Paige: Fields, I don't care what you are thinking, actually I didn't ask you to think, I ask you to swim as fast as you could and your times are getting worse it cant be possible, what happen to you.
Emily: Coach.
Paige: Don't coach me do what I ask you.
I never see her yelling at me this was new for me, I felt my eyes getting a little watering I know she can see it because Im in the pool but I feel it.
Coach Seal: Everything okay here?
Paige: Yeah here Fields, wasting my time.
Coach Seal: Coach.
Paige: Actually you finish for today Fields out of the pool, look for me when you are ready to have a place in the team.
She walk away for me, she was so angry with me that I just stay there in the pool, my team looking at me and whispering things, I took my googles and my cap off and splash it in the water.
Coach Seal: Are you okay Fields?
Emily: Yeah, gonna take a shower.
Coach Seal: You can train with the team if you want.
Emily: I don't want her to be more angry so I gonna be out of the pool for today, thanks anyway.
Coach Seal: Okay, don't worry Fields you are doing great.
Emily: Yeah.
I was in the dressing room took a long shower my team was there finishing too.
Alex: That was intense.
Emily: Yeah.
Alex: I have never see her angry like that.
Emily: I know.
Alex: Are you okay?
Emily: Yeah.
Alex: Okay, good luck Fields.
Emily: Thank you.
Alex was a new member of the team, the new one but biggest competition, she was a star in her high school and I have seen her swim Im pretty sure her times are great too. Everybody left and I just stay there sitting in front of my locker I need to talk to her, to explain myself. I don't know how long it took me to be brave and walk to her office but she wasn't there, I didn't hear the door when she left, so I took my stuff and walk to the pool and I see her swimming there so I just sit at the end of the fool and took the time. It was incredible her time was better than her college record is impossible.
Emily: God.
Paige: Hey.
Emily: Your time is better than you record.
Paige: I know.
Emily: How?
Paige: Well I train Im focus and then I swim.
Emily: Oh.
She went out of the pool I handle a towel and sit next to me.
Paige: So maybe I over do it today with you.
Emily: You were right my mind wasn't there.
Paige: Are you feeling weak again?
Emily: No.
Paige: Are okay? What is wrong Em?
I hear my nickname and I couldn't hold it anymore my tears start coming out like a river.
Paige: Hey, Hey calm down, do you need to talk?
Her hand starts making circles in my back.
Emily: You yell at me, you have never raised your voice with me or anybody.
Paige: I already said I sorry Em.
Emily: I know.
Paige: I just know you have a good chance of staying in the team, but we only have one more week and today we waist it.
Emily: I know.
Paige: So lets talk about what is on your mind and move on for tomorrow.
Emily: I nothing, is a stupid thing.
Paige: Well that thing is keeping you out of the team and if that thing stays with you we wont make it this Saturday.
Emily: Is a stupid thing I will get over don't worry.
Paige: Emily, you are crying you cant swim that stupid thing isn't going anywhere.
Emily: It will.
Paige: Emily please.
Emily: What do you want me to say? Is because of you Aria said this stupid think about you being happy again and she though it was because of me or because we were back in a relationship, but we aren't so I think that maybe you have a new friend or girlfriend, but then how can that be possible if I don't have a life because of you, and you don't have a life because of me. I don't think that is possible or do you, tell me who is she?
Paige: Who is who?
Emily: The girl.
Paige: Which girl?
Emily: Fuck, stop playing games an answer the dam question.
Paige: Wow, relax Im still your teacher in here Fields, I don't know what you are talking about.
Emily: Who is making you happy.
Paige: Nobody Fields, I just happy, to have a job that I love, to have friends, to be alive, to breath, Im just happy.
Emily: But why?
Paige: I don't know, sometimes you just realize you don't need a person to be happy, you need to be happy to have a person, so now Im happy.
Emily: Why cant you be happy with me?
Paige: Em.
Emily: I still love you.
Paige: Em.
I took her face and make her look at me, my eyes still crying my voice and my hand shaking.
Emily: Why?
Paige: Em, don't do this please.
Emily: I know, that you still care about me.
Paige: Of course I do you are ..
Emily: Not only your student and you know it.
That moment she closed her eyes and a single tear escape her eye I was brave enough to catch it with a kiss.
Paige: Why are you doing this to me?
Emily: I not doing anything I just want to love you and kiss you and make you happy.
Paige: I cant we cant.
And I was brave enough today I didn't care at all what she said I just wanted to kiss her and I did, and it was slow and she direct respond at the begging but then she took my face with her hands and kiss me slowly but with so much love, I taste her tears or mine I don't know whose, I don't know how much it last but I knew she was the one who break the kiss.
Emily: Hey, are okay?
Paige: Is not fair Em.
Emily: What?
Paige: You, doing this.
Emily: Im sorry I just…
Paige: Don't said you sorry, I kiss you back but I shouldn't.
Emily: Why not?
Paige: Because of this, our situation, our life, because of her.
Emily: Im not gonna feel guilty about my feelings for you, and I don't think you should do it either.
Paige: I cant Em, not right now, maybe not tomorrow, maybe never, and isn't fair for you to hold to this.
Emily: So, what do you want me to do?
Paige: Focus on this your scholarship, your spot in the team, getting better.
Emily: I am focusing, today just was a bad day, but I will be great tomorrow.
Paige: count on that.
Emily: Maybe in the future you will be ready for me.
Paige: Lets focus on the present, the future is never was it sees or plan. Go home; see you tomorrow at 7 am.
Emily: Good night Paige.
Paige: Good night Em.
It wasn't too late so I decide to walk home, think about the day, the kiss, the talk. Today I realize she still cares about me, and maybe only maybe that happiness is for me, and there is still a spot on her heart for me.
Aria: That was a good training.
Emily: What?
Aria: You walk here smiling ear to ear. So you got your times or what?
Emily: I suck today.
Aria: Why are you smiling then?
Emily: I kiss her.
Aria: You kiss who?
Emily: You know who.
Aria: OMG PAIGE?
Emily: Yeah.
Aria: And?
Emily: She still cares and that my little friend is an opportunity to win again.
Aria: And you love to win.
Emily: I am a specialist on wining.
Aria: That's good Em, just be careful.
Emily: Life is too short to be careful, if you are gonna take a risk do it without thinking, if you are not just don't do it but don't overthink your decision.
Aria: Wow when did Emily "overthinking" Fields became Emily "just live" Fields.
Emily: Life happens and you learn to change your motives. Also life is too short like you my friend to be scare of failing if there is still a chance of winning.
Aria: I can see that. That for sure was a hell of a kiss.
Emily: Anyway I need to sleep today was a hard day and I didn't train two times, Im so tired emotionally.
Aria: I can see that, okay love bird, sweet dreams.
PAIGE POV:
Ezra: I gonna make you pay for that door you ass…
Paige: Hey.
Ezra: Hey, are okay?
Paige: I think so.
Ezra: Why are you knocking on my door like a psico?
Paige: You are slow and I need it you to open the door.
Ezra: I was in the shower Paige.
Paige: Oh sorry didn't know.
Ezra: Well my towel and my wet naked body can tell you that.
Paige: Oh yes cover yourself you asshole.
Ezra: How in earth didn't you notice that I am naked?
Paige: Put some clothes on I need to talk to you.
Ezra: Wait here.
I went to the freeze I took a beer; I know I shouldn't drink that or anything with alcohol.
Ezra: I hope that beer is for me.
Paige: It is I will get water.
Ezra: Good, so psico what brings you here at this time at night?
Paige: Emily.
Ezra: Is she okay?
Paige: Yeah.
Ezra: Okay, well Emily is not here if she brings you here or you are looking for her.
Paige: I know.
Ezra: You know what?
Paige: That she is not here.
Ezra: Good. So this conversation is going somewhere or do I have to guess what is wrong.
Paige: She kissed me.
Ezra: Oh.
Paige: Oh, it that's all?
Ezra: Well, I don't know what to say.
Paige: You are a terrible girlfriend, why on earth she told me you were like a girlfriend for here.
Ezra: Who told you that?
Paige: Ash.
Ezra: Ash said I was her bromance, maybe you miss understand.
Paige: Maybe.
Ezra: So, did you like it?
Paige: Really?
Ezra: I don't know Paige, why dont you talk to me and then I will let you know what I think, I still a guy you need to put apples and pears.
Paige: Fine, I kind of had a bad day with her yell at her at swim practice and she stay at the end we kind of talk she start crying and you know woman cries and hell breaks down is like a poison.
Ezra: It is.
Paige: So she just made the move.
Ezra: and?
Paige: And?
Ezra: Did you kiss her back or what?
Paige: What do you think?
Ezra: You did. So what is the problem?
Paige: The problem I cant we talk about this, we cant do this.
Ezra: You cant, she can she is single and she wants you.
Paige: And I..
Ezra: Come on Paige, you want her too, but I know something is stopping you to move on and I get it you lost her and maybe is too soon, but you my friend like that girl for so long that is impossible to you to be away for her.
Paige: I am away.
Ezra: You come back Paige, I always though you wouldn't come back and here you are, why?
Paige: My life is here.
Ezra: Sorry to be so cruel but what life?
Paige: You? Job? Home?
Ezra: Me? Please I will visit you to the end of the world, job you can have any job, Home that as an apartment a you have been waiting to sell that place for so long to build that house you wanted. Don't get me wrong I love to have you here, but you and I know why you come back and the other three are not a reason. You come back for her.
Paige: I didn't know she was here, how on earth I will come back for her.
Ezra: I know you didn't know. But you have this weird connection with her that something inside of you knew she was here, just like she knew you will come back, she always said that.
Paige: She did?
Ezra: Yeah at the begging I thought it was just her hope, but then I started to believe her she was so sure, and she was right, you are here.
Paige: Now what?
Ezra: Well my dear friend you have to choose to follow your heart or your head.
Paige: Is not so simple.
Ezra: It never is, it sucks destiny has this weird plan for you "you two were best friends, lovers and soul mates destined to be together, everyone thought. But as it happened, one day destiny greedily changed its mind." And is sucks that happen but you know the weird part?
Paige: What?
Ezra: Her plan was always to see you happy, maybe at the end she knew that happy didn't meant her, I know that too, now is time to see you too.
That night I stay there with him, sleeping, he hold me that night it was weird I never sleep in the same bed that a man but I didn't felt like that it felt like a brother taking care of me, of course I cry, we laugh and talk about everything in life.
Ezra: You wake up early.
Paige: I have practice today with Fields.
Ezra: What kind of practice?
Paige: Asshole.
Ezra: Is a joke.
Paige: I have a question for you.
Ezra: Okay.
Paige: This quote you told me yesterday about best friends, lovers and soul mates were did you find it?
Ezra: I don't think you gonna like the answer.
Paige: Ashley?
Ezra: Mm kind off, Emily actually her final essay was beautiful, that girl can write a beautiful book. I have it in my desk do you want it?
Paige: Do you think is a good idea.
Ezra: Oh I think is the right moment, I keep it because I really think you should read it someday.
Paige: Okay.
I took the folder and went to the gym, with a couple of orange juice and bananas cupcakes.
EMILY POV:
Today was different I was or actually didn't know what to expect of her, so I buy two orange juice and a bowl of fruit with yogurt.
Paige: I can see that great minds think alike.
Emily: Hey, good morning.
Paige: Good morning, so ready?
Emily: I don't like the look in your face.
Paige: Today we gonna have a game, well you are gonna play it I just gonna see you hoping you lose.
Emily: Not fare, but lets do it.
Paige: Here.
Emily: A balloon?
Paige: Yeah, the game is to keeping out of the floor or just in the air with your breath.
Emily: For what?
Paige: Training your lungs Emily.
Emily: Oh, if the balloon falls what?
Paige: Well you will do this exercise four rounds five minutes each if you lose you gonna give twenty five push up, man style.
Emily: Will the clock still running?
Paige: It will start again, so you need to do the five minutes free to move to the next round. When you finish we could have breakfast outside if you want
Emily: Ok. Lets do this.
Of course I thought I was easy but then I have two start three times the first time and two times de four round one hundred push up my arms hurt like hell.
Paige: I don't think you gonna swim today, you cant even put food in your mouth.
Emily: Is not funny.
Paige: So two more days for completion are you ready.
Emily: What completion is on Saturday right? is three more days of training.
Paige: Well I was thinking that Friday your teammates wont train so maybe you need to rest.
Emily: I don't need to rest I need to train all days.
Paige: Well lets just swim on Friday okay?
Emily: Okay.
Paige: Is a big day Em, we cant lose, you cant lose.
Emily: I know. And of all the days my mom decide to come this Saturday.
Paige: That's good she will cheer you on.
Emily: I don't need more pressure.
Paige: It will be fine Em, I really think you have a good chance don't worry.
Emily: I like this.
Paige: What?
Emily: You talking to me, like we are friends.
Paige: I thought we were.
Emily: You always saying you are my coach and stuff.
Paige: Because I am Emily, that doesn't mean I don't care about my swimmers is part of being a coach.
Emily: Yeah.
Paige: So you mom is coming are you happy?
Emily: Well I will answer on Saturday.
Paige: You two aren't close?
Emily: Oh no yes we are of course is just being a couple of difficult years for our family but I love her and she loves me.
Paige: That's good, does she looks like you?
Emily: Yeah, just she is smaller.
Paige: So she must be a beautiful woman.
I didn't said anything because I knew that in a way she was saying I was beautiful, so I just smile at her and eat breakfast.
Paige: Well Fields is time to you to take a shower and go to class see you at practice.
Emily: See you.
PAIGE POV:
I was in my bed remember that kiss while I listen to her ipod, with that blue folder waiting in my table to be read, but today wasn't the day. The next couple of days were pretty good training having some times breakfast or dinner with Emily, talking about life, knowing each other again or better in a different way.
Coach Seal: So last practice, and of course we only have Alex and Emily here for training.
Paige: Well those are your stars.
Coach Seal: Is she ready?
Paige: Go a time her.
Coach Seal: Girls what about 200 mts each style I will time you guys.
Paige: Fields will do only freestyle and breaststroke.
Emily: I will do all of them if you let me.
Paige: I don't want you to burn out for tomorrow.
Emily: Trust me on this one I can do all of them.
Paige: We haven't practice all of them the same amount.
Coach Seal: Come on coach give your girl a little of faith and lets do this.
I couldn't said anything more, I girl my girl and my heart just start racing so I just nod a Emily and let her have her way this time.
Coach Seal: Wow, I don't know what you did or if yelling is working but looks like my all style is back good job coach.
Alex: That was amazing Fields.
Emily: Thank you
Coach Seal: Well Fields good job, maybe you need to yell to my swimmers coach. Good job as always Locker.
Alex: Thank you Coach, is good to have the star back. I cant do all the job Fields.
Emily: You wont need to do it.
Coach Seal: Well girls time to take a shower and see you tomorrow at 8 am remember the meet starts at 9 am but I want you here at 8 am.
Emily and Alex: Yes coach.
I just look at the times I have in my tablet and that cant be right she wasn't ready to swim all style I didn't do this, she did.
Coach Seal: You are overthinking this.
Paige: I didn't prepare for all styles.
Coach Seal: Paige, she already swim all style, you got her stronger and back in shape this is the result of your hard work, and she is back you did good you make sure she has a place here. Congrats, now lets hope she makes the same times tomorrow and you did it girl.
Paige: Thank you.
I stay there waiting for her to come ou.
Alex: See you tomorrow coach.
Paige: See you tomorrow Locker.
Alex: See you Emily.
Emily: See you Alex.
I wait for everyone to be gone so I can talk to Emily alone.
Emily: You don't see proud.
Paige: Im confused that's it.
Emily: Why?
Paige: I have being see you swim and practice but I didn't know you could make those times.
Emily: I used to do it.
Paige: Yeah last, semester.
Emily: Well I got back I don't know is just felt confidence about it and in the pool I felt good again like myself. Free, like old times.
Paige: that's good.
Emily: I don't get it, this is what you wanted for me right?
Paige: Of course it is.
Emily: So why don't you look happy?
Paige: I just don't get it how you did it, you spend all the days training with me and I didn't see you can do it.
She took my tablet put in on the chair took my face with her hands.
Emily: Paige, look at me, I didn't know I could do it, I just felt that I could, you did this, you make my body stronger and faster with your hard really hard training, you give me the confidence that I lost somewhere, so be proud because all I am as a swimmer is because of you.
I just nod and hugger, smell her hair that chlorodyne smell, close my eyes and felt her.
Paige: Im really proud and happy for you Em, you are gonna do tomorrow, your mom will be really proud.
Emily: Thank you, so are you okay? Are we okay?
Paige: Sure, well go a rest and tomorrow be amazing as always.
Emily: Okay, see you tomorrow coach.
Paige: See you Fields.
Of course I couldn't sleep I was so nervous about the meet that I couldn't close my eyes, well finally I was so tired that I sleep just a few hours enough for me to be ready for tomorrow.
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