25: Confessions

It was Lysandra's obvious fear and foot dragging that alerted Vilkas they were nearing his destination. It was also around that time that he began noticing the plant life was in the process of dying. The further up the path they trudged, the dying became dead. Animal heads were planted on stakes, further marking the territory and the way. "Lysandra?"

"We're close." She said softly, her reluctant steps faltering into a dead stop. "It's just up the way."

"What do you remember?"

"It's a cave. There were witches outside of it."

"And?"

"I went in, not very far, and there was one of the hagravens. She seen me." It had been narrow, that passageway she had navigated, and there hadn't been much room for sword swinging, or dodging. The fireballs that had been blasted her way had left her trembling, and it was when the hagraven had gotten close enough for Lysandra to see properly that terror had taken over. The rasping breathing, the hoarse 'Companion' the thing had cackled at her…

She was shaking again, and Vilkas took a step closer to her. "Lysandra?"

"I ran, Vilkas." She whispered finally, eyes on the ground. "I killed it, took the head, but then I ran." Technically, she had done the job. She had only needed one head, but she had fled that cave screaming herself silly, somewhat singed, and covered in something black and wet.

She felt shame right now, confessing this to him. The Companions prided themselves on being fearless warriors, he had been antagonistic as well as questioning when it came to her fighting capabilities, her honor, and her ability to keep herself together. She had always tried her best to not give anyone a reason to doubt her or her questionable abilities but… here it all was, laid bare, before the one person she shouldn't have been doing that too.

Lysandra expected him to begin berating her, saying 'I told you so', or whatever he would do now that months of doubts had been vindicated. What she did not expect was to feel his calloused hand gently cupping her chin and forcing her to raise her head.

"Look at me." He ordered, his tone soft but firm.

She looked past his shoulder.

"Woman…"

Reluctantly, she met his gaze.

"There is no shame in being afraid. As long as that fear does not stop you from doing what must be done, there is no reason for shame." And she had done the job, she had fulfilled the task Kodlak had given her.

That… actually helped.

She had gotten the job done, sure. In regards that the job was retrieve a head. She had retrieved the first head she could and hightailed it. Vilkas took the lead once they were inside and that was fine with her. Nothing seemed to have changed, not surprising given it had only been a few months since she had been here. It seemed like ages ago that she had come here, ages ago since Kodlak was murdered… time in reality and time as she felt and perceived it seemed to be very different. "Oh…" That was the body of the hagraven she had killed, headless, and still... fresh looking. She didn't want to know what foul magic preserved the thing. "That's… it."

He surveyed the scene, noting that this area would have given the hagraven the advantage. It was narrow, unfamiliar to those who weren't of the coven, and from the signs of previous fires, he would also guess a good spot to flame intruders. "This is where you fought the creature?"

"Yes." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "There are more further in."

"Then that's where we go."

They cleared out the Glenmoril hags, their still human witches, and the various creatures that littered the cave. It was like the hags had been awaiting the return of the Companion who had slain one of their sisters because neither Vilkas or Lysandra was stealthy enough to avoid detection when it came to the crones. Every time they got close to one, it would hiss at them. Vilkas in particular took the brunt of the taunts.

Lysandra was simply called a Companion, he was taunted with being a beast, his soul belonging to Hircine, and it was wearing on him. She didn't know when or why he had taken the beast blood, but it had definitely been when he was younger and less prone to thinking about the afterlife. Maybe spending time around her and her ability to toddle into death on a daily basis had gotten him rethinking what time he had left. Obviously, he was suicidal, he kept waltzing into danger right alongside her.

Vilkas led the way out of the caves and away from the area, using his keener senses to guide her as the sun had long set. Both of them were covered in hagraven blood, their own, and whatever else they had picked up. Lysandra was openly crying, whatever shame she had had going in, was gone.

The walk seemed longer than it actually was but eventually reached the banks of lake Ilinalta. He surveyed the area, finally satisfied that the only things that posed a threat were the slaughterfish and mud crabs. He picked a spot, set down his stuff and began removing his armor and furs.

Him stripping roused Lysandra out of the silence she had fallen into. She opened her mouth to ask him what he was doing when her own stench hit her. He was going to bathe, and if she smelled this bad, he probably did too. Not to mention, just the idea of washing the dried blood and caked on gore was causing her toes to curl in her boots. She turned her back to him and followed suit, removing her gear. She didn't bother asking if they were safe, he wouldn't have stopped if they weren't.

When she heard water splashing, she knew he was in the lake and it was now her turn. "No peeking, Nord." She said, trying to sound like she was teasing though her voice came out shaky. She was pleased with the relative darkness, it hid the flush in her cheeks.

"I would never… Imperial," came his own husky rasp.