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Important :
Also, I have seen a lot of reviews regarding Laurel and trust me, her point of view will be revealed. Also, they are a lot of reviews that I want to reply to. Lots of thank yous to be said and questions to be answered, which I assure you would be done in the next chapter.
Also, the shear amount of love that I've received regarding my board results and college, thank you!
Not betaed. If you spot an error, kindly point it out or you can ignore it. Thank you.
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Word Count : 8276
Without further ado,
Disclaimer : I don't own anything that seems familiar.
"It's easy to make up your mind,
But convincing your heart is the hard part."
Then to
Chapter Twenty Two : What do they want?
Felicity focused her attention on cooking. Flipping the pancake one last time, she turned the stove off before putting it on the plate. Glancing at the kitchen slab, she sighed, moving back to the stand against the slab opposite to it. She had been cooking for past two hours which is why the slab was littered with all sorts of food ranging from bacon and eggs to pancakes.
She just needed a distraction to be honest. She had been up almost the entire night. At first she started watching television again but when that didn't work out she started to code. An after almost an entire night of coding, which was something that was supposed to distract her but it didn't she would like to add, she started to cook.
And here she was. Her hand reached for the cup of coffee lying on the slab. Taking a sip, she closed her eyes for a second, her shoulders sagging.
Last night's conversation kept playing in her mind.
The guilt kept addressing itself repeatedly. She wasn't ready for this. She knew he had suffered and she knew her faults, she had apologized for them but she had never really given a thought about how it had affected him.
How much had it really affected him.
She was angry that he cheated. So, angry. And when she realized this situation, she even addressed the fact that if she would have been in his place maybe a doubt would have hit her regarding his loyalty. But they would have talked. They should have talked.
But that never happened. And it made her believe, that he never loved her. That he believed in all those things that he spewed at her fact that day in the hotel.
Never had she given it a thought, that all those years even he believed that she didn't love her. That he believed that she had left him for another guy. That she chose Ray over him. And in hindsight, that was true. She chose Ray to help her out rather than Oliver.
But that was only because she had already caused Oliver so much pain. It was his ultimatum when he left their house that made her realize her wrongs and it was that move that made her realize that she wanted to be with Oliver. That she wanted to lead her life happily and not ruin it.
Until it all came crashing down.
For both of them.
She bit her lip, the thoughts in her mind still running a mile per second. She sighed before glancing at the clock. It told her that it was nine in the morning and she contemplated whether she should go and wake Oliver up. This probably was one of the perks of being the CEO, they didn't have anyone sitting on the top of their heads asking for them to show up on time. Which is why she ha decided that Oliver could wake up on his own.
But it was his phone ringing for the umpteenth time that day that stopped her. It was lying on the coffee table, on vibrate mode. Yesterday, late at night his phone had started to buzz. She didn't want to pick it up because it was her. She wasn't sure if Oliver wanted anyone to know that he showed up at her house or if she wanted anyone to know that.
So she had sent a text to Thea saying that 'I'm safe and would show up tomorrow' just to assure her of the fact that he was indeed okay. But his phone had started to buzz again in the morning and now, she figured it was better to wake him up.
She took off her apron, keeping the cup of coffee back on the slab. Rubbing the edges of her palms against her eyes one last time, she turned her head towards the staircase which lead to her room, the exact place where Oliver was lying.
It had been a hard task to get him upstairs. He kept stumbling, murmuring words but she had tried to ignore most of them. So, when he stumbled towards her room instead of the guest room, she had let it happen.
I don't want to let you go.
I can't
Maybe we can be together again.
There were a lot of things that were going on in her mind. She however didn't have the time to dwell on it. She made a beeline towards the bathroom, opening the cabinet and getting some aspirin out. She almost smiled when she realized that he had done the same for her once. That they were in the exact same scenario, but the roles had been reversed.
Taking a glass of water along, she climbed up the stairs to reach him. She pushed the door open lightly, peeking in ever so slightly only to find him snoring ever so softly. Placing the glass on the table beside him, she crouched down.
His head was turned towards the said table, his back against the bed, one hand lying on his stomach while the other one on the bed. Soft puffs of air escaped his mouth, his snoring prominent. She remembered the time he had started to snore. He never did initially during the time they dated or when she was pregnant. It had started Conner was born. Both of them were usually so tired and he had picked up this habit. It had taken so long for him to agree that yes he did snore and she had teased the hell out of him, post that.
And involuntary smile graced her lips. Her hand moved, fingers ghosting over his cheek. He looked solemn, it felt good to see him so peaceful. Especially after how he was last night. Suddenly, she was hit with how he had been once he had discovered the truth, what had actually happened.
Was he the same way then as he was now? It was funny, how despite knowing what had happened, he was still suffering. Both of them were.
Her hand brushed his cheek and that was all he needed. His eyeballs moved a little behind his closed eyelids, lines appearing on his forehead as he let out something akin to a moan.
She shouldn't have done that, right? Why did she do that?
Oliver groaned, his head moving. He opened his eyes slowly, at first it was all burry and he had to blink thrice to actually let his vision focus. His throbbing head wasn't helping much to be honest.
It was when his vision focused did he realize where he was. Felicity stood in front of him, standing right beside his bed and he almost wondered if he was dreaming again. Her name escaped his lips, his elbows moving back to support himself as he lifted his upper body.
"Hey," She whispered deliberately, "What-what am I doing here?" Oliver frowned, once he realized where he was.
Felicity's heart dropped a little.
Of course, he didn't remember. Why would he? It wasn't like it was an opening to a relationship anyway, she shouldn't be this sad.
She shook her head hastily, "You-"She paused for a second, "You were drunk. Came barging through the-"She turned her head ever so slightly, jerking her thumb towards the door, "Through the door." It felt awkward. Was it this awkward when she was drunk? It shouldn't be this awkward, right?
"I did-"Oliver held his head in his hands, "I did what?" He let out a hiss, it felt like something sharp was banging his head repeatedly. He massaged his temples with his hands, "I'm sorry. I don't know what-" He was cut off by Felicity who shook her head, "It's okay."
She crouched down opening the drawer, taking out a packet of Oreos that she usually kept for late nights in there. Oliver almost huffed out a laugh, huffed being the keyword. This headache hurt like hell.
"Eat two before you take the aspirin," Felicity instructed him and Oliver nodded his head, trying his best to smile, "Thank you."
"I'm-I'm downstairs." Felicity told him and he nodded, "Yeah, I'll be there." She nodded back, turning around the next second. She pouted her lips, a puff of air escaping it.
Well, that went better than she expected.
…
Ten minutes later, Oliver made his way downstairs, his hands still massaging his temple but he looked better than before. "Feel better?" Felicity asked, her hands against the kitchen slab. Oliver actually smiled this time, "Yeah."
"Good," She replied back and he sighed, his hand dropping from his forehead. "Listen, I'm sorry for all this-" He closed his eyes tightly, "I don't how this happened-"
"You really don't?" She asked him, almost cursing herself for it later on. "I mean you did before, when you usually got drunk, I mean-"She paused, finally finding some control on her broken brain to mouth filter, "sometimes."
"I-" Oliver didn't know what to say. It was becoming clearer by the minute as to why he showed up here. The memories were hazy though he remembered some of it. He remembered thinking of how stupid he had been to yell at Felicity, to be thinking about Ray and Felicity and then Ed and Felicity and also cursing his stupid psychiatrist. He remembered snippets of the incidences post that. He remembered some parts of what had happened here.
Some.
God, why had he come here of all places?
Somehow, he knew the answer to that question.
But, was he ready to accept it?"
"Not really." He spoke and Felicity bit her lip, her poker face on, "Right."
"Your phone has been buzzing," The pointed towards the device that was kept on the table, "This entire morning." She turned around, picking up the coffee cup she had prepared for him, "You should check that out."
"Right," Oliver nodded his head, his head turning around to locate his phone. Once he saw it, he walked towards it and picked it up. He let out a small sigh when he realized the number of messages on his phone. In the next he frowned when he saw a message from his side too, "You messaged them?"
"I did." Felicity started, "I mean I didn't want them to be worried so I messaged. However I didn't say you were-"She ended hastily, "I didn't tell them."
Oliver didn't say anything for a second, his fingers working hastily to probably text them something and Felicity waited for his response. "Thanks for this," He waved the phone, "And for not kicking me out." He almost laughed at that, "And for the aspirin and-"He frowned, finally noticing the amount of food that was there on the slab, "Did you cook all of this?"
Felicity groaned a little, "Yeah." She looked down at the food, "I was-"She stuttered for a reply, "awake. I mean I woke up early so." Her hand moved awkwardly. She shoved the coffee mug a little in his direction, "I made some coffee for you if you want." She moved the plate of food a little, "And can some have some breakfast too. If you want,"
Oliver nodded, walking towards her. He took the cup from her hand, shooting her a grateful smile. "Thank you, for all of this. I must have been ass last night and for you to do this-"
"You weren't an ass last night."
Oliver's eyebrow raised, "Yeah?"
"Yeah," Felicity echoed him, "You weren't."
He really wasn't.
Oliver apparently didn't hear her because his phone buzzed yet again. His focus was on it, a frown coming on his face in the next second.
"You need to leave?"
He eyed the message again. It was from his home.
Oliver turned his head towards Felicity, "It can wait."
He wanted to stay here. His eyes wondered around her house once again and then Felicity who was standing behind the kitchen slab, assembling plates for the two of them.
And he won't admit it to himself.
But the reason why he wanted to stay here because this felt like home.
…
August 2010
"Good morning," Felicity greeted Oliver with a bright smile as the latter entered the living room, blinking his eyes rapidly even though he just washed his face minutes ago.
"Morning," He mumbled back, making his way towards her like always. He hugged her from behind, his face nuzzling her neck making Felicity giggle. "You're like a furnace," She commented, her hands working on the pancake, "You love it." He mumbled, tightening his arms around her, his half naked body pressed against her.
In the next moment, he loosened his arms before they encased around her stomach and Felicity almost laughed, knowing what he was doing. "He won't kick yet, Oliver."
"She," He corrected, pressing a kiss against her neck, "It's a she."
"It's a he and you'll see," She almost glowed the next minute, "Ooh…that rhymed!" Causing Oliver to chuckle. She placed the pancake on the plate, trying to move around to get the fork and knife. "Oliver! Let go!" She said and Oliver chuckled, "No." He declared against her neck and Felicity pretended to be angry even if she really wasn't.
"I'm hungry, Oliver!" She huffed, "Let go!" Oliver sighed, giving in the last minute, "Okay." He removed his hands, his shoulders sagging and Felicity turned towards him, grabbing his face and then kissing him, "Thank you."
Oliver rolled his eyes, walking towards the refrigerator. Taking out a carton of milk, his eyebrows rose when he found Felicity sitting on the other side of the room. Her hand holding the knife and fork, ready to devour four pancakes.
"Uhuh," He let out almost instantly, making a beeline towards her before taking the plate from her. "Oliver!" Something akin to a growl escaped Felicity's lips and Oliver knew he was in trouble, but he didn't care.
"You're dealing with morning sickness," Oliver started, "You need to eat something light every little while which means," He pointed at the plate, "You can't have this."
"But I want it!" She stated, "You know how long have I been craving for this? I woke up at five, Oliver! To cook this-" She pointed towards the plate in the same way he did, "And look what you're doing!"
"You can have two," He declared, walking towards the kitchen and then picking out another plate. Placing two pancakes on them, "MAPLE SYRUP!" He chuckled a little, pouring some of it on those pancakes.
"I hate you," Felicity shot Oliver a full-fledged grin as she took the plate from him, "You love me." He stated, placing a kiss on the top of her head.
"You can have the other two in the next two hours," And Felicity scoffed, "And if this continues Felicity, we're shifting to the mansion."
"I want to shift to the mansion," She mumbled in a small voice, "I've been wanting to talk about that with you since forever. It's lonely here. You're out at Verdant and I've already coded a lot in these past few days," She shrugged, "Plus, Thea and I could hang out more and she has this awesome sense of style! That day she bought those tiny shoes which were so cute," She scrunched her nose while speaking and Oliver smiled, "Then we will,"
"Yeah?" She grinned almost toothily.
"Yeah," He answered back before walking out of the living room, "Maybe they can also keep an eye on you and your food."
"I was craving!"
"It's for you and smol bean, Felicity! She needs it! " He said back, his voice at a higher octave so that his wife could hear him.
"Smol bean is a he!"
"Then for you and champ, Felicity!"
Felicity stopped, not knowing what to say next. She smiled to herself, hearing the word 'champ' escape his lips.
Their princess or their champ.
It sounded beautiful.
And now, she was going home.
Yeah, despite everything.
It was going be great.
Her home.
…
The day in the office had been a slow one. She had arrived late because of obvious reasons and Oliver hadn't arrived as of yet which she understood too. Moving her pen between the first two fingers of her right hand, she kept on thinking about last night.
His words had been hogging her mind since then. She didn't even have a proper sleep for fuck sake and now here too. No kind of distraction was actually helping her.
I don't want to let you go.
She particularly hated Oliver for that one, might she add.
Well, I trusted you. Look how that turned out?
She dropped the pen on the table, a sigh escaping her mouth as she leaned against her chair. Her hand landed on it and she closed her eyes promptly as if this will make it all escape.
He suffered too. He had suffered before and somehow, he was suffering again. Should she do something about it? She was well aware of the fact that he was trying and she had shunned him down so many times. But she hadn't given a thought about how he had been dealing with all those years.
It made her feel guilty. Because all those three years, he had believed that Ray was with her. And while, she also knew that it was his own perception but he made her realize that she played a part in it. A big part in it.
All those years, somehow both of them were being tormented by the same thing. While she caught him cheating, he believed that she cheated. They were dealing with the same sort of grief and Oliver was repenting for it. But was she? Should she?
She was moving her chair ever so slowly, swinging it. It had somehow managed to calm her down yet the thoughts were prevalent. "Felicity?" She bit back a groan when she heard her name, choosing to open only one eye to see who it was. She was sitting comfortably, she didn't want to be disturbed.
John grinned a little watching her and Felicity straightened almost instantly, "John," She greeted her friend with a smile, "What are you doing here?" She asked while he walked towards her.
The head of security sat on the chair that was right opposite to her. "You want some coffee?" She asked and when he nodded, she called out her assistant's name asking him to do so.
"So, what brings you here?" She asked, her eyes trailing towards the paperweight that Diggle was playing with.
"Actually I was here to check up on, Oliver." He answered, "Thea messaged me last night that he wasn't home last night and she thought that he might show up at the company." He paused, as if waiting for her reaction but Felicity didn't say a word, he continued, "Thea just texted me on my way here that he reached home."
"That's," Felicity's eyes on the red pen she had been playing with before resuming the same, her chair swinging lightly, "good." She finally met his eyes.
Diggle just smirked a little and considering, Felicity knew him very well, she would say that he was on to something.
And maybe she was also aware as to what he was onto.
But shrugging that thought away, she wondered if she should ask Diggle. If she should ask him how Oliver had been during those three years. She might as well do that, this was her best shot at knowing that. "Digg," She grabbed his attention, "How was Oliver after we broke up? I mean, he thought I cheated…right? How did- how did he deal with that?"'
She could see her question took John by surprise which was a rare sight to see, "What brought this on, Felicity?"
"Just wondering," She said almost too quickly.
"Well, how were you when you both broke up? He was the same, Felicity. He lost his wife and his son." Diggle continued, "He was insecure, Felicity. He needed therapies-his family put him in this bubble that was away from reality," He stopped for a second, "Both of you suffered for something that shouldn't have happened in the first place. Both of you were miserable."
She didn't want to make a comment but she did, "But then he got with Laurel." This was also something that had been stopping her from confronting Oliver, or hell from acting on her mistakes, "The misery must have went away, right?" She tried to laugh it off.
Diggle didn't answer.
…
August 2010
"So what is it that you wanted to tell us about you and Lyla?" Oliver asked. Felicity, Diggle and he were sitting in the booth that they always did.
It had started years ago after Felicity befriended Diggle. He had always been close to John, but then Felicity befriended him and once, had literally forced Digg to join them for lunch once. And then it started.
They often got together. Just the three of them.
Felicity hummed in agreement with Oliver, looking at him curiously.
"Lyla is pregnant," Diggle said and it took Felicity almost three seconds to react, "Oh my god!" She sounded gleeful, reaching forward to hold Digg's hand, "I'm so happy for you both!"
"That's great, John." Oliver smiled brightly, "This is an amazing news."
"Wait, I'm pregnant too!" Felicity realized the next second, "What if our children end up together?" She pointed at Digg and then at Oliver and herself, "That would be-"
"Can we not talk about this?" Oliver almost groaned, stopping Felicity mid-rant.
"Oh shush, I have to call Lyla." Felicity declared, getting out of the booth to talk to her friend.
Diggle watched her leave, "Lyla had the same reaction." He admitted.
"We're doomed." Oliver stated, "Be prepared for hormones and mood swings. Loads of them. From crying, to anger and let's not forget, the two am reminders about food."
"I am." Diggle nodded his head, "I think."
"Ooh, your wife also knows how to operate a gun, right?"
"Yep."
"Ouch."
"Like I said, I think."
…
Oliver's hands rested on the steering wheel as he drove towards Queen Consolidated. He was well aware that it was past lunch time there, but he didn't really want Felicity to be working alone.
Felicity.
Somehow, yesterday he had managed to end up at her house. He remembered some of it and honestly, he knew the reason why he went there.
What do you want, Oliver?
Maybe he was really aware of what we wanted. His hand tightened on the steering wheel, did he want to accept this?
Was he ready to accept this?
He knew he wasn't deserving of Felicity. He never could be because he didn't really know how to make everything better. They weren't going to be able to find their way back to another, could they? He just didn't know what to think.
What do you want, Oliver?
His mind was joining the dots but he was refusing to admit that. Because it just wasn't right. A battle between his mind and heart again. Did-was this right? She didn't deserve to be with someone like him, did she?
He didn't not know.
He really didn't.
…
September 2010
She really didn't know.
She was so confused.
Narrowing her eyes, she tried to analyse the situation and then think about it.
"I think we should go with peach," Thea suggested and Felicity shook her head, "That would be very bland," She made a face.
"Pink," Oliver said with confidence and Felicity rolled her eyes, "Blue." She countered him. "I am tired and we haven't even started painting yet," Tommy declared, while sitting on the floor against the wall.
"You're of no use," Felicity muttered, "None of you are."
"I still don't know why you haven't decide to know the gender of the baby yet," Thea rolled her eyes, her hair bouncing, "This is stupid."
"Surprise," Felicity corrected her, "We want it to be a surprise."
"I thought you knew it was a boy," Tommy declared, finally getting up.
"I do," She nodded her head and she could swear she saw Oliver shake his head in amusement.
"Well, Ollie thinks it's a girl." They turned their heads only to find Laurel standing there, "Right?"
"Because it is." Oliver deliberately looked at Felicity nodding his head at her, "It is."
Felicity simply shook her head, her eyes focusing back on the wall which was white. Frowning a little, she finally reached the colour she desired, "How about yellow?"
"Yellow?" Thea tilted her head, "Why?"
"Well, it is a brighter version of peach in a way," She reasoned, "And it is neutral. Plus black and yellow go really well together. We can paint cartoons on it!" She cheered, "I saw this is a movie once. Pretty awesome and can have letters sprawled on the wall that say his name." Her eyes glowed with delight, "Oliver?" She waited for his response.
Yellow.
Somehow that colour reminded him of Felicity's blonde hair.
Bright was the word that came to his mind.
Like mother, like daughter.
"Yellow it is,"
Felicity smiled and then nodded. And even though, she wasn't really allowed to pick up and paint a lot she had a lot of fun. Plus, she looked really cute in her denim dungaree dress.
And hot. As Oliver had described it.
Which might or might not have ended up in her being covered in yellow paint and screaming his name as they did it against the wall.
She had a yellow butt print to prove it.
Like she said, it was fun.
…
Felicity frowned when she opened the envelope that was lying on her table. It seemed fancy. Too fancy for her liking to be honest. Her eyes eyed the text on it before her eyes widened.
"You got this too?" Oliver stood near the door of her cabin, leaning against the edge of it. His legs were crossed, his hand holding the same envelope-an invitation¸ she would rather say. "Is this what I think this is?"
"Don't tell me you forgot 'picture day'," He tried to laugh, entering her cabin, "Events in this city never end, do they?" She mumbled under her breath, throwing the invitation on the table, "Apparently they don't."
"Who are hosting it this time?"
"The Bowens." He told her and instantly her face turned sour, "Why them?" She groaned, "Why us? Why me? I'm not even-"She paused and she must be dreaming because she definitely saw Oliver's face fall a little, "I'm not even your wife anymore, Oliver. So I don't why I'm being asked to come."
"You're also the CEO of this company," Oliver reasoned, "They are people there all across from Starling, Felicity. Those pictures go to magazines too, remember?"
She remembered. Of course she did. It was supposed to be an event to celebrate the rich and the elite of Starling. Almost all the CEOs show up to Starling, come to think of it, it could be a great party business wise. But it was also the same party that allowed them to snap pictures with their families and she didn't have one anymore of that, did she?
"Do I have to go?" She looked at Oliver, "Aren't you going?"
"I have to," He responded, "No one else is going from my family." And Felicity's eyebrows furrowed at that, "No one?"
"Dad's not here this year. Mom doesn't want to come and Thea, well she was never interested in the event. So I would have to go, anyway."
Felicity contemplated for a second. "You don't have to come if you don't want. I'll handle it." Oliver said softly and Felicity almost agreed with him.
But then Oliver was going to have to deal with those morons alone?
It was for the company after all? She would get to meet the best CEOs in town and maybe even talk about the future of their companies. The only part of the actual party did she like was the personal time they gave to the families to snap private pictures which they would be given. And then, it was usually pictures for professional purposes followed by a buffet.
It was going to suck, wasn't it?
But here she was, agreeing to it anyway and she honestly didn't know why.
"No, I'll be there."
She picked up the invitation again, eyeing it carefully. Reading it one more time, her eyes flickered towards the end of the invitation where it said that they were allowed to bring one date. For once, she was glad she didn't have to RSVP anyone back. The event was in two days, so they just had to show up the invite and let themselves and their date in.
Maybe she could take Ed.
Looking up, her eyes landed on Oliver's retreating figure.
Trust me! Not Ed!
She sighed.
On second thoughts, maybe not.
…
Two days later, things hadn't changed much. Although they had been working together, still the topic of him coming to her house at night was never touched again and Felicity would admit, her heart did fall to her stomach when she realized that Oliver indeed didn't remember any of it.
While, they was definitely no progress with her thought process because she was still stuck on Oliver's words that night and to top it all, she was also stuck with Diggle's.
He was insecure.
He suffered too.
Now, all these things made Felicity think. Because of course they did as she was thoughtful like that. She wondered if she should forgive him.
Forgive him. For everything that has happened? It went across her mind like a movie reel and she was caught in a conundrum whether to do it or not.
Did she want to forgive him for everything? She knew if she did, they would start afresh. And not as lovers. Because let's face it, that is never going to happen again. He was with Laurel so that thing won't be happening. Ever.
But forgiving him as a friend? As someone who has tried a lot trying to fix whatever this was. She didn't like to see him the way she saw him back then.
His eyes were puffy, his eyes held regret something that she knew since the beginning but now that she herself was realizing what she had done wrong, she had realized that he had never held her account for it. Never had he brought up the fact that she had been the one to push him away, he had always been there for her. Sure, he had moved away after a little while but that was her own fault.
And he had never asked for an apology for that.
So maybe, the least she could do is just acknowledge that he was trying. What had happened between the two of them, it wasn't easy to forget. She wouldn't lie. It wasn't. It still haunted her sometimes. The words, the cheating-It did.
Maybe it haunted him too.
And that hurt her. A lot.
So, she was going to try.
Try to do what though?
Forgive him?
Did she really want to forgive him?
What did she want?
….
Oliver brisk walked towards the mansion that belonged to the Bowens. Lifting his wrist, he looked at his watch realizing that he was almost half an hour late. He saw the carpet lined up and almost scoffed.
Honestly, Bowen why?
There was a podium right beside the gate where people were turning in the invitations they had received. While on the end directly opposite to it were reporters. Loads of them. He expected them to be here, after all it was a pretty big event.
Now all he needed to do was turn in his invite and he was-
Wait, where was his invite? He groaned to himself, his eyes closing, the realization dawning that he had left his invite in the car donning on him. Now, he had to walk all the way back to his car to retrieve it.
"Oliver?" He pivoted his head towards the source of the voice, his eyes widening a little at the sight of Felicity. She stood in front of him and he honestly didn't know how hadn't noticed her before. Her hair was in an intricate bun, her lips were red which went really well with the beautiful dress she owned. The red dress (which of perfect length may he add) she wore hugged her body perfectly and the zipper, oh god there was a zipper.
"Oliver?" She asked him and it was then he snapped back, "Yeah?" He asked before blinking his eyes rapidly, his bottom lip tucked between his teeth, "I mean, what?"
"What are you doing out here?" She asked, her head tilting ever so slightly, "Actually, I was about to go in." He told her and Felicity nodded, "Me too. I was just about to turn this in," She pointed at the golden invite.
"Me too-I," He stopped all of a sudden, "I actually need to get back and get mine. I sort of left it in the car." He shook his head a little. Felicity couldn't really stop the words from escaping her mouth, "No date?"
Oliver let out a breath past his lips, "No."
"Right." She almost smiled, "You should go get that invite." She started, "You know they won't let you enter without it which is stupid don't you think? I mean, since you got the invite, don't you think your name should be on the list? But you need it. So you have to go get it or you can get in with me," She closed her eyes tightly, biting her tongue, "I mean not get in get in. I mean, mine says plus one and I don't have one and I was just –" She shook her head, "Babbling which will stop in three, two, one." She took a deep breath towards the end of it.
"Really?" Oliver asked, "I can get in as your plus one?"
"Yeah?" It came out as a question.
Why is she talking like this?
Why is she acting this way towards him?
Why?
"No Ed?" He asked her too and Felicity shook her head, "Actually Ed's already in there." She pointed inside, "He's a senior reporter, you know?"
Yes, she asked Ed to accompany her to this event earlier today. She had been confused as to do it or not. Especially knowing how Oliver had reacted to him earlier. But then she had decided, she would ask him. Because if Laurel can be there, why can't Ed be there?
After all, there was no going back to being a couple was there? If something did happen, it won't end up with them being a couple anyway, right?
Right?
But now, she felt weird that he hadn't showed up here with her. And the two of them were stuck with one another and now she had offered him to be her date. Literally offered.
Where was Laurel anyway? Had they broken up? Maybe a fight?
She didn't have the chance to dwell further because Oliver offered his hand to her. Her eyes which were full of surprise met his. Her mouth parted open, not sure whether she should take it or not.
"Until Ed, right?"
He is insecure, Felicity.
Or Ed, trust me!
She hastily placed her hand in his. His hands were rough and large like they always had been. She had honestly forgotten the last time she had held hands with him this way.
His hold was tight and there was a small smile on his face, his dimple visible.
That was until she replied back.
"Until Ed."
…
Oliver's hold on the wine glass tightened the minute he spotted Carter heading towards him. Like dealing with Ed today wasn't enough, that he to deal with this douche bag too.
Why did it have to his house of all places? He was a doctor for fuck sake, his mother had been the one who was handling the business but no it was him that was greeting people and organizing this thing.
"Oliver!" He greeted him so happily, his hand landing on his shoulder and Oliver moved a little, shrugging the hand off, "Carter." His voice was low and emotionless.
"Man, Felicity's looks really hot!" He said in a congratulatory tone, "It must be nice working with her every day, right?" He grinned widely, his teeth on display that Oliver wanted to punch so badly. "Although, she is hanging out with that reporter," He frowned and Oliver rolled his eyes, "Is he like her boyfriend or something?"
"Something," Oliver said, his teeth gnashed together as he patted his shoulder, walking past him.
He made a beeline towards the table that was assigned to the two of them. "I've come to a realization," Felicity started as he sat down, "I don't hate parties. I hate people," She raised her wine glass in the air with a mock smile on her face, her eyes trailing towards the woman of her nightmares, Isabel Rochev.
"What about Raymond?" Oliver chose to mutter the next few words under his breath, "His last name matches Ray's first name. Perfect."
"He's busy," She answered, "You know, this event literally has nothing good about it."
"Tell me about it," He mumbled, side eyeing Bowen who was a few tables away from him.
"There are the two of you!" The lady looked familiar and Felicity narrowed her eyes, trying to think that where had she seen her. It was Oliver who sprung up from his seat to greet her, the name 'Samantha' escaping her lips.
Ooh, ooh she was the douche's mother, wasn't she? Carter's mother?
"Felicity," She smiled warmly at her and Felicity almost felt bad for not recognizing. She smiled back, hugging her lightly.
"It's good to see you two together," And Felicity and Oliver shared a glance, unsure if she meant as CEOs or as a couple, because No. They were so not a couple. "QC has definitely ended up in good hands," She laughed and Felicity realized, she meant as CEOs.
Cuz no.
"You both want to go ahead," She pointed at the booth behind her, "Magazine reporters are apparently dying for a glimpse at the CEOs of the top most company in Starling at the moment." Oliver grinned a little, acknowledging her, "We'll be there."
"Photos," Felicity mumbled under her breath.
Conner used to love this so much. The bright flash used to make him squeal so loudly, chuckles emancipating his tiny body the next second.
God, he loved it so much.
And now, she bit her lip.
He wasn't here.
"Shall we?" Oliver gestured towards the path in front of her and Felicity hastily replied back, "Sure."
And as she walking with him, she realized it was the two of them and photographs and interviews. With the reporters.
But she should get used to this right?
Because they were partners. Work partners and that is their job, so it shouldn't really be that bad. Especially if she was thinking of forgiving him.
Is that what she wanted?
To forgive him? Did that come so easily? Because it didn't seem easy to her. She didn't. Was she ready to forgive him?
Should she?
Ah, just when she thought she had forgotten about her problems.
She really didn't know what to do.
…
Ed wasn't really excited about this event initially. Back when he was doing his job in Gotham, he knew how boring these events could turn out to be. Business people were boring, it was rare that he spotted some young CEOs and if he they were usually engaged with someone else and he didn't really get the time to interview them.
Suffice it say, he wasn't really excited about this event.
But the Felicity called him and he will not admit it but he was close to freaking out then. He had fretted at first when she called him, wondering why she was doing it in the first place. Was it to tell him that she won't text him anymore? Or that their first date won't happen even if they hadn't really talked about it.
He hesitantly had picked it up and had heaved a sigh of relief when he heard her babbling at the other end.
Because it was Felicity and she babbles.
She ranted about how she needed a date but then had also clarified that they were friends. It pinched Ed a little, not knowing where it was coming from but knowing her past, he wasn't questioning her.
Slowly and steadily.
He had almost said yes, but then it had dawned on him that he had to report to the said event early and couldn't accompany her inside.
On the plus side, at least the event looked interesting and provide him with good news.
So here he was. Most of the reporters had been lined up and he was glad that he finally had the opportunity to talk to them. He had been wanting to talk to them about their project since the beginning of time, which is exactly why he had showed up at the inauguration of the 'Robert Queen' project. But both the CEOs had vanished somehow.
But today, he had the opportunity to ask them questions and also, to be with Felicity. Never in his life had he ever been so hung on up on a woman. But she was just different. Her babbles, her honesty and most of all her drive to work with her ex-husband despite the things that had happened between the two of them.
Speaking of her ex-husband, Oliver Queen didn't really seem that harsh towards Felicity then he had assumed he was.
From what he saw, they were rather gentle with one another which pinched him a little. The subtle glances and when the photographer asked them to stand beside one another, his hand on her shoulder-he expected them to be awkward around one another which they were, before they just gelled.
And he didn't like that.
Not only because he liked Felicity but from whatever he has heard from her about Oliver. The man didn't deserve her.
And here she was, probably giving him a chance.
A chance to do what?
The answer didn't really appease him.
He skimmed through the photos, wanting to check if he had missed someone. He beamed when he came across a pic of Felicity and him. Another picture overlapped it and he slid his pic towards the right, trying to see the entire picture. It was a photograph of the two of them, a candid shot to be very specific and it brought a smile on his face, until he saw the full picture.
Oliver stood at the other end and while Felicity's focus was on him, a beautiful grin on her face unaware of the fact that her ex-husband was staring at her.
His hold on the photo tightened but he didn't say a word.
He didn't have the right to.
At least not yet.
At least, Felicity wasn't looking at Oliver but him. Him.
But from Oliver's point of view, it looked like he was standing between them.
He scoffed a little, dropping the picture back on the table. Turning around, his searched for Felicity. He might as well be with her now since his work was done. He looked here and there, only to find her standing at the edge of table where she once sat at.
She was looking at him.
He nodded in her direction in acknowledgement but when she didn't reply back, he frowned.
He followed her line of sight, only to found her looking at Oliver.
Who was staring back at her.
Turning around yet again, all he could observe was a smile forming on Felicity's face and Ed tried to ignore it but he wasn't able to.
Yeah, he was in between them
Literally?
He wasn't so sure about that anymore.
…
Oliver stood alone in one corner, his hand holding a glass of wine. He brought the rim of the glass to his lips, taking a sip of the golden liquid.
He was confused.
The psychiatrist's question ricocheted in his head. The day had gone by in a blink of an eye and somehow, it was okay. But what this day wasn't able to do was distract him from reality.
What do you want, Oliver?
The answer was clear. The answer probably was right in front of him but could he?
He couldn't.
She didn't deserve to be with a man who cheated on her. A man who didn't betray her. A man who stood beside her.
His fingers twitched, the bitter realization finally hitting him.
Someone like Ed.
It was always a conflict between his heart and mind and somehow, his mind had won. She deserved better and he wasn't that person.
You could be once you figure out what you want.
But the truth was, he didn't know to find his way out of here. So yes, what he wanted was just Felicity's forgiveness.
Nothing more.
His cobalt eyes met her shining blues and he was took by surprise when she shot him a wide smile.
And Oliver's heart warmed.
Earning her forgiveness it was.
Just that.
Nothing more.
Nothing more.
…
Felicity stared at her feet, her lips pouted together. She was standing against her table, hands behind her using it as a support.
She was supposed to leave the place because there was a buffet and she didn't eat those, thanks to her allergy. She remembered after these events it was usually Oliver who took her out to dinner and they spent the entire day together.
Somehow, everything she thinks about leads her to Oliver. Always Oliver.
So, should she forgive him?
To give this a chance. To give him a chance, again?
What did she want?
The truth was, it didn't really matter. It wasn't like Oliver and she had any chance of ending up together. And it hurt. It shouldn't but it hurt her. Her mind told her it was the right thing to do while her heart didn't like to accept it.
If she did give him forgiveness, there would find their way back to each other as friends.
Did she want that?
To top it all, did she want to forgive him?
She was unsure of both of these questions.
Her eyes flickered towards him, only to find him musing in his own world.
Not to fucking, Ray!
He is insecure.
Go away, Oliver! I don't need you here.
I lost my son!
Maybe, she could start by acknowledging it. By acknowledging the fact that he was trying and this could be her redemption.
She wasn't ready to forgive him for somethings. That night still haunted, that image was still etched in her mind.
But maybe eventually, it would go away.
At least, the least she could do in this moment was acknowledge that he was trying to work on whatever this was. To make him see, that there was something left to rebuild.
By both of them.
And he won't suffer anymore.
Not because of her, anymore.
So, when she met his eyes, she did something unlikely. She smiled at him.
For the first time, in a long while did Felicity shot Oliver a smile that genuine and just meant for him.
Because this was a start.
A start towards building this back.
Their friendship.
Because there wasn't anything past that, right?
There couldn't be.
Nothing more.
…
This was what they wanted right?
Wanting some sort of forgiveness from one another.
From themselves too.
So they'll try.
Try to work their way towards each other and build something back.
Their friendship.
Because there was nothing past that, was there?
Being friends was it for them.
So, when they realized what they wanted, the next question hit them.
Is that what made them happy?
Being friends?
And suddenly, they didn't have an answer anymore.
And that is it.
A new beginning for them, right?
Hoped you like the chapter!
I would admit, I was kinda surprised when I saw people relating to Oliver too. Relationship is always a two way street, folks :') And I'm so glad you loved the last chapter and understood it.
Thank you for the love! I sure would reply in the next chapter!
Until next time,
Srishti x
P.S. Who is proud of me to have finally learnt how to align author's note?