Chapter 24

She stayed with them for a total of three more days. Glancing at her still and lifeless body, Misaki felt tears welling up in her eyes again. Despite the pain she had suffered, Yin had still gone on peacefully. Since Yin's request for her presence, she had spent every minute of free time with her, not wanting to miss her time of departure.

When she was up to it, they would chat or other times, Misaki had read to her. After she had extracted that promise, Yin never brought up the topic of marriage to Hei, trusting her to keep her word. Instead, she just enjoyed her life how she wanted to. She spent the most time with Yin, but Hei also made extra time to be with them. Ricardo could handle all but the most critical tasks.

Saying her final goodbyes, she passed on late into the previous evening. Once that happened, Hei had left saying he needed to make preparations. For what, she wasn't so sure. Did they have funerals here as well? She didn't see a grave site which marked the deaths of other demons. Regardless, the wounds were too raw for her to leave Yin's side.

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, Misaki took Yin's cold hand in hers. Though it was the choice she made, she couldn't understand why Yin had chosen as she had. She knew that spending time in her presence – human presence – would shorten her life. So why? She could have lived longer than three days if she had followed Mikhail's instructions.

Her eyes focused on Yin's face, Misaki memorized every detail, not wanting to forget anything. Though they had known each other for less than two months, she had quickly become someone important to her. She was going to miss her gentle demeanor, her easy smile and even her light teasing; most of all, she was going to miss the calming encouragement she always provided.

"Misaki."

Turning her head at the sound of Hei's voice, he was standing by the partition which separated the sleeping area from the remainder of the room. She managed to give him a weak smile before he drew closer. As he glanced down at Yin, he didn't say anything. He seemed to have the same thought as her; to engrain her image into the deepest depths of their memories.

"You should go down and eat something," Hei eventually said.

"I'm not hungry."

"Perhaps you don't feel that way, but you still need to eat."

"… Alright," she replied reluctantly. "Will you come with me?"

"Of course."

Gently tucking her hand back beneath the cover, Misaki stood and nodded slightly at Hei. She was as ready as she would ever be. Yin wouldn't want her to waste away due to her passing – far from it. If nothing else, she needed to live her life to the fullest for herself, but also for Yin's sake; that her life was cut short prematurely.

"What did you need to prepare?" Misaki asked, brushing away the residual wetness from her eyes.

"Oh that. Every demon needs to go through the ceremonial death passage."

"Every demon? What's involved?"

"Basically, they are freed from the bonds of fate," Hei explained. "It's a duty of the clan leader to oversee the ceremony."

"Oh… Is it complicated?"

"Not particularly. Once we are given notice of someone's passing, we allow family and friends enough time to say goodbye. It's usually enough time factoring in our travel time. I just… Wasn't thinking to do this so quickly for Yin."

Frowning in response, Misaki couldn't help recalling Yin's words. She had known all along that her presence would deteriorate her health, but she chose not to say anything until it was too late. Despite her reassurances that no blame was to be placed at her feet, she couldn't help feeling a slight sense of guilt.

"It was her choice," Hei said gently, sensing the direction of her thoughts from her sudden silence. "She loved you, as much as she loved me. She wouldn't have changed any of it just to live a little longer."

"Is that what she said to you?"

"Yes, though not in those exact words. She has always been stubborn in nature. You wouldn't be here with me now if I was capable of influencing her decisions."

"… True," Misaki answered, the frown easing from her expression. "I just wish things were different; that it wasn't just because I'm different."

"You're fine the way you are. She wouldn't have wished to change you in any way and neither would I. We'll muddle through this together," promised Hei.

Nodding her head as she glanced up at him, he smiled lightly. She managed to return a small smile. Wordlessly, she slipped her arm around Hei's and he tugged her closer. With Yin gone and Kanami miles away from her, she needed someone close; the comfort of another living being.

They continued on their way to the dining room where food was already laid out for them. It had cooled with their delayed arrival, but honestly, it wouldn't matter. She had no appetite and she didn't think she would notice the taste. This was more for the fact that her body needed to be refueled and nothing to do with the enjoyment of the process.

Hei guided her to her usual spot and helped push in her chair when she went to take a seat. When she was settled, he took the seat at the head of the table. Quietly, they both filled their plates and partook of their meal. A solemnity had taken over the castle with the news of Mistress Yin's passing and none felt the pain so sharply as Hei and Misaki.

"… Would you like me to find someone else to take the role of companion?" Hei eventually asked. "I know no one could ever replace Yin and Kanami has left us indeterminately, but perhaps you would feel better if someone else was with you?"

"No. I'll be okay on my own. I just need some time to come to terms with it," Misaki answered. "Everything just happened so suddenly."

"Alright, but if you ever change your mind, just let me know."

She nodded her head, inwardly sighing. If anyone should feel like curling up into a ball and weeping their eyes out, it should be Hei. Yin had been with him for centuries, his first love. Yet here he was, still looking out for her when he could have blamed her for Yin's untimely departure.

"… Is there anything I could help with?" Misaki asked hesitantly. "I know it's not my place, but if there's anything I can do…"

"For the ceremony, Ricardo is preparing everything right now. It's not necessary, but if you can think of anything you would want to do… That's fine."

"Mm… No," she said, shaking her head. "I can't think of anything. When will the ceremony take place?"

"Whenever we're ready after we finish eating."

"Oh okay…"

Silence fell between them. Though this ceremony was necessary, Misaki wasn't a hundred percent sure what would happen. Hei had explained in a way that didn't reveal any details. Being "freed from the bonds of fate" meant nothing to her; it wasn't something she could relate to from her human experiences.

A little apprehensive given the unknown, she eventually finished eating, as did Hei. When he glanced at her questioningly, she took in a deep breath before nodding her head. The suffering from a loved one's death was something only time could heal. It already happened and there was nothing she could do to change that. There would be no point in delaying the inevitable.

They clung together as they left the room, much in the same way as they had descended and travelled there in the first place. A million questions formed in Misaki's mind, but not one of them was voiced. If she started, she didn't think she could stop. Not to mention, there were some things that one could never prepare enough for. This was one such moment.

When they entered Yin's room, it was to find that Ricardo had laid her body on top of the blankets. Her hands had been clasped together over her chest with a small posy of white flowers in her grasp. At each corner of her bed, a single stand was set up to hold a candle; a different colour sitting on each one – red, black, yellow and white. Ricardo stood quietly to the side waiting for their arrival, a small pouch in his hands.

"Everything is ready, My Lord."

"Are you ready?" Hei asked Misaki.

"Do I have to do anything?"

"No, just stay beside me."

"Then, as I'll ever be," she stated.

Hei nodded at Ricardo and he started the ceremony. First he went to the top left corner and lit the red candle. He let it burn for a minute before opening the small pouch in his hands. Misaki couldn't tell what was in it, but he took small handfuls of it and scattered it over Yin's body. He then moved in a clockwise direction to light the next candle, the black one. Again, he let it burn for a minute before sprinkling more of the powdered contents over her body.

He continued to do this for the remaining candles; the yellow one next and the white one last. Each pause, he would spread more of his pouch's contents over her body. When he was finished, Yin was covered with a light layer of grey-white powder. Then, he stepped to stand in line with them, a few feet away.

"Brilliance beyond compare," Hei recited. "Glistening moon's radiance, dancing upon crystalline water's surface. Twinkling stars' luminescence, teasing amidst the twilight canvas. Extinguishing the light, swift and steady. Curtains of solemn darkness descend. Chains of destiny, release! Free and unfettered, rise upon the morning's breeze, in unity with the sky."

Not sure what would happen next, Misaki did not take her eyes off of Yin's body. They seemed to be waiting for something to happen. Suddenly, Yin's body started to float in the air. It glowed, gently at first and began to increase in intensity, but not to the point that she was forced to shield her eyes.

Gradually, her body began to dissolve into a million lights. Collectively they began to pulse; slowly at first, steadily increasing in frequency. It seemed like the beads of light were struggling to break free and eventually did. A small cluster departed away from the rest, splitting away from the rest which still held the form of Yin's body.

Bit by bit, the clusters floated off – upwards toward the ceiling until their light grew dimmer and faded from their sight completely. The process started little by little, but reached a point where every step was in a state of equilibrium. It wasn't long before the only thing remaining was a tiny group of lights – perhaps five or six.

Hei frowned as this last portion lingered as every part of the deceased's former body was supposed to dissipate, returning to the world in which it was born into. He had never seen something like this before as the ceremony should already be finished by now. Even so, there was nothing he could do but wait and watch.

Watching as a small number of lights stayed behind, Misaki struggled to contain her emotions; biting her lip to stop herself from crying. With this, she was truly gone for good. Despite it being a necessary process, she was still reluctant to part from her. The last little bit of her was all that remained.

A startled feeling came over her as these last few lights began to glow brighter and pulse faster than the others had. Eyes wide with surprise, Misaki chanced a quick glance at Hei, wondering if he saw the same thing. His brows were pinched together in a slight frown, but otherwise, nothing else indicated that this was something strange.

As she watched the lights once more, they seemed to be struggling against each other. They swayed together into a tight cluster before breaking apart. Together and then apart; this process continued and Misaki could see that the distance between them increased each time they separated.

When they finally scattered, they didn't follow the path the other clusters had taken. Rather, they regrouped and started travelling horizontally – directly towards her and Hei. Her hand involuntarily clenched at Hei's arm as she wasn't sure what this meant, if anything. But just as suddenly as it floated towards them, it disappeared before them.

Suddenly, the gravity of the situation settled itself in her mind and she began sobbing. Now she was really, really gone! Not even one little bit of her remained. She knew she shouldn't, but she couldn't control the unbearable grief. All she could do was cling to Hei helplessly.

"Shh, it's going to be okay," Hei said, holding her close.

She wanted to believe him. She did believe him. Yet at the moment, it was too much to bear. Try as she might, she was unable to hold back the flood of tears. Though she cried harder at his words, Hei continued to hold her, stroking his hand over her back in a soothing manner.

The passage of time became indeterminate. Whether it had only been a minute since her outburst or ten, Misaki couldn't tell. Yet eventually, she started to settle down from the sheer exhaustion from the overflow of tears and violent trembling of her body.

As rationality returned to her mind, she felt herself flush with embarrassment for behaving so foolishly. She must look absolutely terrible with the unending bout of tears and runny nose which she had cleaned on Hei's chest… All the while, he hadn't said anything but words of encouragement while holding her tightly within his embrace.

"Are you feeling better now?" Hei asked gently.

She slowly nodded her head, even as she remained pressed up close against him. Though Hei had seen her crying before, she didn't think any of the previous episodes had been quite so dramatic as the one now. She didn't want him to see how dreadful she appeared.

Despite her wishes, he eventually pulled her away from him and she couldn't meet his gaze. From the corner of her eye, she thought she detected a slight smile. Rather than speaking, he rummaged around in his pant pocket and produced a clean handkerchief.

Gently, he tilted her face toward his and dutifully cleaned her face of the residual tears which had streamed down her cheeks. He was taking it so seriously, she couldn't help but blush. Every little crease and crevice was wiped as he inspected every inch of her face. Finally, when he was satisfied, he asked her to blow her nose.

"There we go," he murmured. "Now then… What would you like to do? Shall I escort you back to your room?"

"… What are you going to do?"

"I have some work to finish, but I want to make sure you're comfortable before I start."

"Oh… Could I stay with you?" she asked.

"Of course. If that's what you wish."

Misaki blushed beneath his gentle gaze, wondering if it was wrong to have such a reaction at a time like this. After all, they had just said their final goodbyes to Yin moments earlier. Now she was behaving like a complete ninny. Even so, she slowly nodded her head. Knowing Yin, she would be encouraging this type of interaction, rather than having her death mourned…

"Alright, then let's go downstairs. If you like, you can grab a book from the library and meet me in the study."

"Okay."

She slipped her arm around Hei's before he guided them out of Yin's room. He accompanied her until they reached the study. Stopping outside of it, he directed her to the library which was at the end of the hall. Though it was only a short distance, she considered asking him to go the full distance with her. Yet in the end, she decided not to. There was no need to act so clingy when he was showing such fortitude despite all that occurred.

"I'll be right back," she murmured.

"And I'll be right here waiting."

He smiled lightly before he entered the study, leaving the door open for her return. She didn't move until he was halfway into the room. Sighing softly, her languid steps slowly took her to the library. She didn't understand how he could be so strong at a time like this.

Was it due to his position as clan leader? She didn't even see him shed a tear and he had been the closest to Yin. And she was devastated, only having known Yin for a couple months… Not that she would ever think that he was heartless, but she couldn't help wondering what his secret was. That he could maintain such strict composure when it was so painful and heartbreaking.

She went to retrieve a book which she had started reading, but never finished. Though her current frame of mind wasn't meant for doing solitary tasks like reading, she would do her best. Hei was a busy man and she didn't want to become a burden. Already, she did nothing to help around the place when she was ultimately brought here for such a purpose.

When she returned to the study, it was to find that an armchair had been pulled close to the desk. She could sit beside him, rather than face him across the desk. As she sat down on it, Hei turned to give her a quick smile before he resumed working.

Watching him, she didn't even know what he did. He had never explained it to her. At the moment, she was nothing better than a freeloader. Obviously, it didn't bother him, but it bothered her. In order to help, the first step would be their marriage. Both Yin and Kanami had informed her that it was part of the mistress' duties, but she wasn't mistress of the castle yet.

Pushing those thoughts from her mind, she slowly opened the book in search of the page she had last stopped at. She forgot to mark her place. It took her a couple minutes to find it and when she did, she focused her attention on the words in front of her. Unfortunately, her mind was restless and she found herself re-reading the same passage over and over.

Inwardly sighing, she discreetly glanced over at her companion. Clearly he didn't have the same issues as his stack of completed paperwork had doubled in height. He didn't even look at her, fully immersed in the task at hand. Really, she didn't get how he could be so strong.

"And she said he isn't as strong as he appears to be…" she thought to herself.

AN

The worst part of this chapter was writing the incantation Hei uses during the death ceremony... I wanted it to be poetic and still describe (somewhat) the process of what happens - being freed from the bonds of death, physically. Otherwise, the chapter is pretty short, but still a critical one.