Omake: If Hollywood made a live action Goblin Slayer( or how I would want it to be.)

"In a world, were heroes are too busy fighting monsters, goblins are free to terrorize the land. There is no hope, for there is no hero or adventurer that can roll the dice of fate good enough to fight both goblins and monsters."

A snow storm falls unopposed on an empty street, just outside the entrance to the Guild.

"But in this chaos one man has emerged"

An armored foot descends suddenly into the screen breaking the now violently.

"He is no hero."

The Guild door opens and trough it two people enter.

"He will not save the world."

"My name is Goblin Slayer. I'm returning from killing goblins and I came here to get a quest to kill goblins. Oh, there were a couple of monster I slayed on the way here, but I want to kill goblins. Are there any goblins here?"

"But he does not let the dice decide his fate!"

A hard field, where a single straight line of adventurers made up of Warrior, Wizard, Fighter, Noble Fighter, Rhea Ranger, Hal –Elf Wizard, Human Nun all straightened their backs and looked at Goblin Slayer and Priestess.

"I need be me several adventurers. Several goblin hating adventurers to help me build an organization that is dedicated to one purpose and one purpose only." Goblin slayer said as he paced back and forth in front of them.

"Killing Goblins."

Come and see what critics are calling: 'A less violent version of Peter Jackson's the Hobbit'.

"Hey, why am I Fighter? Why can't we pick our own dammed adventurer names?

"No way, no way. Tried it once, it doesn't work. You get a whole party all fighting over who's gonna be Captain, but they don't know each other, so nobody wants to back down. No way. I pick. You're Fighter. Be thankful you're not Cabin boy!"

"A new tale from director Quentin Tarantino."

"His last final feature."

A montage if shown of the whole Slayer army loading their guns, bows and unsheathing their swords.

"Will leave no survivors behind!"

The Slayer Army all screamed a war cry and charged a Goblin Horde!

"When you find kill a goblin you always stab in three dimes, first to down it, second to check the body, third to make sure. That's the answer that you get, number 3. Not number one, and certainly not no 2, number 3. You do that because that way you are sure that the goblins are dead. Also, because it's fun." Goblin Slayer said to the assembled crowd of hundreds of Slayers.

"I am here to kill goblins. Not dragons, not demons, not monsters, just goblins. I know I said that earlier. But I just felt that there might be someone that was too busy laughing to properly read the sentence and so as to avoid misunderstanding, I said it again." Goblin slayer said to the gathered crowd.

"What?"

"Say what again. I dare you." Goblin slayer said and cocked his shotgun.

The scene changed to a battle where the Slayers were a goblin horde was running away from the Slayers.

Who looked more scary than the goblins.

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men."

Goblin Slayer threw his sword straight into a goblin's skull.

„Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness"

Goblin Slayer helped heard villagers inside a big hall, barded them in and turned to face a goblin horde.

" For he is truly his brother's keeper."

Goblin Slayer cut down a goblin that almost jumped a fellow adventurer from behind.

"And the finder of lost children."

Goblin Slayer smashed open a door and finds goblin children hiding there.

"And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers."

Goblin Slayer used a rock and his bare hands to repeatedly bash the head of a wounded, downed, but still alive goblin Lord.

" And you will know I am the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon you."

Goblin Slayer shot his gun as the scene changed to a book being closed.

Sword Maiden, who was the one that just read the holy monologue, said in a most regal voice to her gathered flock.

„Does anyone have an idea of the meaning of that quote?" She asked the gathered crowd, where no one had an answer, so silence reigned for a moment

„Kill all the goblins." Goblin Slayer said from the front of the crowd.

"Yeah sure, let's go with that." Sword Maiden said with a smile

The scene changed to Spearman and Witch having a meal at the Guild inn.

"Well, well, well, looks like our quiet little northern village town, is going to become quite lively for the foreseeable future." Witch said and took a sip of vine.

"Yes it does." Spearman replied as he was reading a scroll.

Featuring Dave Kaye as Lizard Priest: 'I do not know well the tongue of man. But I believe the name of the one we are seeking is Goblin Slayer. Yeeesssss.'

Grey DeLise as High Elf Archer: "Yes! We killed you all! You will never rise from the ashes of your shame and humiliation!... Ah! that was fun."

John DiMaggio as Dwarf Shaman:"What time is it? Goblin killing time! So bite my shinny metal axe!"

Hylden Walsh as Priestess:"In the Temple barrier merely represents the protection of the user. But the new ways to use it I will research, FOR SCIENCE!"

And Samuel L Jackson as…

"HO!HO! HO!"

Adventurer's Kriss Kringle.

"Merry Questmas, ni#$rs! "

He said and drew two broadswords.

"Here's ya f'^&*ng presents."

"Well, since you'll be leaving in the next couple of days, that rain check will be worthless. But that's okay. I understand if I make you uncomfortable. You're still a nice girl, and I still like you. But I must warn you of something - you know how people say "You're okay in my book" or "In my book, that's no good"? Well, I actually have a book. And everybody that registers here goes in this book. And, now I've met you, and you're going in the book! Except, I'm afraid I must file you... under... well, there's no class for your type of specialization, looks like we're gonna have o make a new class because of you." Guild Girl said as she talked to Goblin Slayer, who was on the other side of the counter.

"What was your name again?" she asked.

"Goblin Slayer. G-o-b-l-i-n S-l-a-y-e-r. The r is silent.

FASTER GOBLIN SLAYER! KILL!KILLLL!

Coming this Christmas, to a theater near you.

…..

''Keeps the reader turning the pages''- Pennie Mae Cartawick, author of 'Sherlock Holmes: The Gaslight Collection'

"Think of Lovecraft and Poe, and then put on 3D glasses." -Howard Lipman- Author of the 'Delphic Oracle' and Tesla's Tower'

What if in the struggle between magic ans science, magic was the victor?

What if technology dissapeared and magic became what was used to colonise the galaxy?

What if now magic is used to wage war across the stars?

The imperial fleet's only hope for victory is the 'Hero of the Empire' Metternich. Too bad that the man many consider to be their greatest hero, is in fact their greatest coward.

Metty once more finds himself in a desperate situation on the Planet of Volun 4. Newly promoted to the rank of

Commodore, he must take command of the defeated 378th fleet cops and lead it to victory against a superior foe, and he must do that before the arrival of an even greater enemy force, while also keeping his secret cowardice hidden from his own troops, lest they turn on him.

Meanwhile rebellion stirs in the Occupied Territories, as a mysterious figure called 'Nobody' emerges to rally the rebels and lead them to victory against the Empire. But is he truly their salvation?

Enemies to his front, vengeful rebels to his rear and surrounding him are allies that may betray him at any moment.

Just another common weekday for poor ol' Metty.

-BALADA: a Song of Stars by R.