Chapter Twenty Five

Facing Forward

"Are you ready, my love?"

What a loaded question. Was I ready? Would I ever be?

With a heavy sigh, I nodded my head. I was as ready as I could be to face the Cullen family in my shiny new shell. Of course, Alice was the first to reach me, wrapping her arms around me and ignoring both my tensed reaction and the words of warning from Carlisle and Jasper. Sometimes, I thought seeing the future caused her act on impulse in order to avoid being able to predict the outcome before it happened. Maybe she had seen enough visions to know she would survive this encounter with me. Or maybe she was just too excited to stop and think about her actions. Whatever her excuse, the close proximity was making fighting the overwhelming urge I had to flee that much more difficult.

There were now seven vampires in my bedroom, including me. The room seemed much smaller than it had moments ago, and I was starting to feel claustrophobic. Apparently sensing my mounting panic, Jasper pulled a very reluctant Alice away from me. I gave him a grateful smile before turning my attention to the others in the room. Emmett looked almost exactly as I remembered him, big dimples flashing next to his exuberant smile. I couldn't help but smile at him in return. Then I focused on the woman standing next to him. Rose was even more stunning when seen through my vampire eyes. She gave me a warm smile of acknowledgement, and I hoped we'd have a chance to catch up soon. It was good to have the two of them back with us again.

Then, there was Edward. He stood back as if waiting for an opportunity to run far, far away. I envied his close proximity to the door and easiest means of escape. I knew if I tried to run, he would catch me before I had made it halfway through the doorway. It was weird how I just knew these things. Like I knew I could use the window to get away and how far it was to the ground. I sensed the thickness of the walls and how easily my new improved body could plow right through them. The ones behind me and to my right would take me directly outside. The other two led to other rooms, obstacles to slowdown my retreat.

My eyes flickered between the two loves of my life faster than I would have thought possible, even with my enhancements. Memories of days spent in Edward's arms flooded my brain as I recalled every second of our time together. Up until the day he broke my heart, I had thought him to be amazing. He had been everything. Then he was gone. I started remembering the cracks in the smooth finish. Our relationship had seemed perfect, but it wasn't. Not really. Even though I knew most of his actions were driven by an innate need to protect me, he had not treated me as his equal. He had loved me, he still did, but he wasn't in love with me. Not anymore. Edward still loved the girl I used to be and conveniently overlooked the woman I had become. In his eyes, I would never be more than that teenaged girl. It was as if I had somehow harnessed Alice's ability and could see how a future with him would play out. It was sweet and gentle, like our meadow, but it wasn't what I wanted. At least, not now that I knew what it felt like to be consumed by love for another person and have that love returned in equal measure.

I turned to focus on Carlisle. Edward was my past, and I hoped we would find a way to be a part of each other's future, but Carlisle was my forever. He was my destiny. He was my reason for existing. Everything that had happened shaped me into the woman I had become, one strong enough to be Carlisle Cullen's mate. The trials and tribulations I'd faced were necessary evils. As I looked around me, I realized I was exactly where and who I was always meant to be. I smiled and made my way over to Carlisle, allowing him to wrap me in his strong embrace.

When I finally stepped back and turned to face the others, I noticed there were now only six of us in the room. I sighed in resignation. It had to be up to Edward whether or not he and I could move on from this and form a new bond that was based on a mutual respect and familial love rather than romantic feelings.

"He just needs time, Bella. He'll come around, I promise." Alice interjected as if reading my thoughts.

"Thank you, Alice. Now, will someone please show me how to hunt, so I can get rid of this annoying burning in my throat?"

All five of them volunteered, so we decided to just go as a group. It made more sense anyway, since I would need all the help I could get. Plus, I didn't want to take any chances on being more than one of them could restrain in the event we came across a human. Not that it was likely; we were out in the middle of freaking nowhere, but I didn't want to take anything for granted.

"Why am I covered in blood while the rest of you are spotless?" I sighed, disappointed in myself.

"Bella, it just takes practice. You'll be a neat eater in no time," Jasper consoled as he grabbed me and rubbed the top of my head with his knuckles.

Seeing this new side of my family members made the burning of transition totally worth it. They were so carefree since they no longer had to constantly battle their bloodlust around me or worry about hurting me. We roughhoused all the way back to the house and had a blast together. I loved how they felt comfortable joking around with me now. Emmett kept trying to tackle me, but he was no match for my newborn strength. My favorite parts of the day were taking him down and pinning him to the ground. His ego was bruised, leading him to try repeatedly to best me, only to meet the same fate time and time again. It was great.

Even Jasper got in on the action, constantly ribbing on me and trying to catch me off guard. We hadn't had an opportunity to truly get to know one another before, and I was so glad to have this new chance to do so. Jasper was such a great man, um vampire…whatever, and he was already taking on a protective older brother role much like Emmett. It was kind of funny since, physically speaking, I was older than any of them. I couldn't discount how many years of experience they had over me, though. Besides, I liked being treated like a kid sister.

When we returned home, the couples dispersed to their own areas of the mansion. Edward's scent was still as old as it had been when we left to hunt, so I knew he hadn't yet come back. I hoped he didn't stay away too terribly long. He was an important member of this family, and I knew it would mean the world to Carlisle to have his son home with him again. They had endured so much over the past ten years since leaving Forks, and it all weighed pretty heavily on Carlisle's shoulders. I knew he still, at least partially, blamed himself for the darkness that descended on the family after he allowed Edward to dictate that sudden relocation. Ever since, his family had gone through so much turmoil that he believed could have been prevented.

I no longer held any resentment toward any of them regarding their sudden departure from my life. If anything had been different, I may not have ended up with Carlisle, and being with him was something that I could never regret. So, I hoped for total reconciliation and a reprieve from all the guilt that swirled around these walls like a festering wound.

"You know, there is still one more thing you need to experience without human limitations," Carlisle stated in a tone that had me squirming in my skin.

"Oh, and what is that?" My melodic voice actually trembled with anticipation of what I hoped he meant.

Without further explanation, Carlisle crossed the distance between us and lifted me off the floor in one swift motion. We landed on the bed with a soft thump, and I wondered how he'd managed such a delicate landing. My thoughts didn't contemplate it long, however, because his lips were suddenly everywhere. He was worshipping my body without the limitations my mortal form had necessitated. It was truly amazing to see this side of him, so unrestrained and natural. Not an inch of skin was missed as we learned each other in new ways. There was so much about him I hadn't been able to see before. He had a scar on his bicep, close to his shoulder, that matched the one James had left on my hand all those years ago. I would ask him about that later.

I was unnecessarily catching my breath after Carlisle had brought me to ecstasy . . . again. Honestly, I'd lost count around twenty something. It was kind of hard to concentrate on anything other than the immense pleasure we were sharing. Being a vampire definitely had its perks in that department. We didn't get tired or fatigued. There was nothing to make us stop other than the need to feed. And, apparently, the doorbell.

"Who would be here now? It's two a.m." I had been so distracted I hadn't even heard anyone approach the house.

Carlisle smiled down at me before his entire body suddenly tensed. His eyes darkened in a way I hadn't seen before, frightening me. I didn't have time to question his reaction before he was up, dressed, and throwing my clothes at me. I quickly put them on, seeing the urgency of the situation.

"Why now?" he asked before grabbing me and hugging me to him with a fierceness I knew sprung from a deep-seated concern.

"Carlisle?"

He silenced me with a finger over my lips.

"Promise me, no matter what happens, promise me it won't change anything. I can't live without you, Isabella."

I nodded, unable to speak. The ringing of the bell turned to insistent knocking. Alice was pacing her room while Jasper was asking her what we should do. Emmett and Rosalie seemed to be frozen where they had been when the visitor first made his or her presence known. None of their reactions were helping to ease my anxiety. Who could be there that caused them all to freak out in such a manner? The not knowing was torturing me.

"Shouldn't we answer the door?" I whispered, needing to find out who our visitor was.

"I'm waiting on Alice. I need her to make the first move."

In a way, his response made sense. If there was something or someone there that could cause harm to any member of my family, I was all for precaution. What I didn't understand was why he wouldn't just tell me what was happening. He could explain it quietly enough that he wouldn't be heard by anyone but me. He could have given me some indication of what to expect, how to feel about our unexpected company. I could only detect one new scent, so I knew there was only one being out there. I couldn't hear a heartbeat, so I knew he or she was not human. But, why all the concern over one vampire?

After only a few seconds of pause, which felt more like a lifetime, Alice left her room and headed in the direction of the door. She called for us all to follow. Her tone was strained, and I could tell she wasn't exactly ecstatic about whatever was about to happen. I wondered if the Volturi had sent someone ahead to let us know our time was up. Something along those lines was the only thing I could think of that would justify everyone's reactions.

Alice waited until we all reached the entryway before opening the door and revealing Esme standing there with an impatient expression. Her eyes scanned each face before stopping at Carlisle. She glanced down to our intertwined hands and huffed out a sigh.

"So it's true," she stated angrily yet seemingly unsurprised. "How could you?" Her tone was almost a shriek as the glared up at Carlisle in accusation.

Faster than even I could comprehend, Carlisle had her back pressed against the wall with his hand wrapped around her throat. All I could do was stand there and watch. Esme had once been like a mother to me, and it was hard to see her suffer, but I knew if I tried to intervene in any way, it would only make things worse. As if confirming my thoughts, Alice dashed over to stand in front of me, wrapping her hand around my wrist in gentle restraint.

"You have no right to come to my home and demand answers for my actions. They are no longer any of your business. You left, Esme, not me."

"I left because you barely even looked at me anymore. You didn't even come after me or try to get me to come back. All our years together meant nothing to you."

"What was I supposed to do? Run after you and beg for you to return? Well, sorry, but I don't go chasing after women who have made it perfectly clear how much they detest me."

Carlisle's words confused me. When he had told me about Esme leaving, he didn't mention anything about them fighting or anything beforehand. My human memories were a bit fuzzy, but I was certain they were intact.

A wave of calm enveloped me right before Jasper bean to speak.

"I think we all need ta take a moment to calm down a bit. Esme, your visit has caught us by su'prise, and I'm sure you're equally su'prised by what ya've seen, so maybe we could sit down in tha livin' room and talk this out some." Jasper's southern accent was thicker than I'd ever heard it before, and I wondered if it was due to the stress of the situation or if he was doing it intentionally.

Thankfully, Carlisle released Esme, and we all headed into the adjoining room. Alice arranged us on the furniture, switching Esme and Emmett after seemingly seeing a need to change their positions. Once she was satisfied with the arrangement, she nodded her head and sat down next to me, taking the hand not occupied by Carlisle's tight grip. Jasper sat opposite of her on the other side of Carlisle, his hand resting on Carlisle's shoulder. He'd mentioned that touch strengthened his ability, and I worried about my mate's emotional state. Carlisle didn't seem happy to see Esme, at all, and I couldn't help worry about the affect her being there had on him.

My bottom lip felt foreign when I pulled it between my teeth. I hadn't had much cause for the old habit since becoming a vampire, but the situation was making me extremely nervous and a bit agitated. There was already so much to worry about, and now my mate's ex-wife was sitting in our living room, looking like she wanted to rip off my head. To say I'd had better days would be a massive understatement.

Disclaimer: SM created it...I'm just mixing it up a bit

A/N: I was really nervous about posting this chapter...but Esme's return was unavoidable and things couldn't wrap up until she was dealt with, right?

Thanks for reading :-)

~SP