A/N: I've written this chapter like ten times now. I'm going to be honest I don't know if I I'm progressing to slow or to fast in the story line. BLARGH. Anyway. I do hope you guys enjoy. Its a long chapters..

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. The song is Gabrielle Aplins "Human"

Show me that you're human, you won't break

Like a thief in the light, you can't hide, you can't hide from your shadow

It's the only thing you own

And you don't need to pretend that perfection is your friend

'Cause we're all broken.

We all end up alone

"You know if you glare any harder Hatake-san's head might actually catch fire." Sarutobi-kun said. Another day off. No training. No nothing. For some reason I was feeling really clingy. I needed to be around my friends. I couldn't let them out of my sight. " Wow, I think I might get some snacks. You might actually kill him. Ugh, unless you like him.. Please not you too. Don't tell me you're really jealous of Rin."

His hands went up in the air when I turned my gaze to him. Unlike the Creep my friend was in striking distance. Right now my hands itched to beat on something. He was lucky he was my teammate, and I couldn't risk him being hurt on a mission.

Yeah

That's the excuse I'll use.

"I wonder if you're more flammable. I could have Obito test out that theory later. You know he's been dying to test out some of those fancy Uchiha jutsus. All I have to do is give him a good reason." no inflection in my voice. I was completely serious. Even alluding to me liking that Creep was grounds for murder.

"Sheesh. I get it!" he huffed dejectedly. The bark on the branch we were perched on suddenly became very interesting to him. I rolled my eyes.

"Stop pouting." I grumbled.

"I'm not pouting." he gave a little sniffle for added effect. My irritation didn't disappear, but I felt myself deflate just a bit. Was I going to acknowledge his pathetic attempt to butter me up? Nope. Definately not. In fact, I'm not even going to look at him anymore.

"SMILE! Just be glad she didn't get stuck with Guy. Could you imagine?" he dropped the hurt puppy look. Instead he shoved his shoulder into mine. "It could have been worse."

"No, no it couldn't have." I was completely serious. All I could see replaying over and over again in my head was his fist going through her chest. I could hear the high pitched chirping of the electricity that arched from finger to finger. "This is the worst outcome possible."

"Yuri-chan if this is about what happened… You know there is no guarantee we don't' get hurt. We are ninjas after all. I mean.. At least Hatake-san already has experience." his voice dropped an octave and trembled ever so slightly. When I glanced at him again he was looking at the nasty scar on my arm. I didn't see any point in changing my clothes to hide it. Comfort will always win out over vanity in my book.

Regardless.

Did he really think this was about our mission?

"I don't care if he becomes the next Sannin. I don't care if he becomes the youngest Hokage in existence!" I let a bit of my rage slip through. Balling my fist I slammed it into the body of the tree we were standing in. Bark splintered and caved in, but I felt a little better. "She will NEVER be safe around him."

"Yuri-chan.. that doesn't make sense. Who else would you have her paired with? I hate to say this but Obito-san is more likely to hurt her on accident then Hatake-san." he looked genuinely confused. I wanted to scream. I wanted to just kill Kakashi now.

"You don't understand! No one understands! I saw her die. I watch her die over and over and over. It's always the same. It's always him. And I can't do anything. I just watch and watch and watch." years of pinning this shit down came rushing up. Anger, fear, helplessness hit me like a ton of bricks. Hot tears started to slide down my cheeks. Nails started to dig into my forehead, and before I realized what I was doing I was scratching at my seal.

"Its so real and every time I try to call out she never hears. I can't save her Kenji! Nothing I do ever saves her from him!"

Invisible hands clamped around my throat. Finding air became some what of a struggle. My heaving breaths turned into short little gasps. Looking up through blurry eyes I saw Sarutobi-kun talking to me, but it sounded like he was far away. Sharp pains in my chest made me curl forward a bit. I couldn't be here. I already said too much. I lost control. I wanted to take all the words back. Speaking them aloud made them seem so final. Feeling flighty I took a step back.

"Calm down! You're okay. We're okay. Rin is okay." Sarutobi-kun grabbed my wrists and pulled me back forward. His brow pinched together and he was paler. He pulled my hands down from my forehead and placed them firmly on his chest. "Come back to me Yuri. Breath with me. Breath. In and out."

Pressure enveloped my lungs. Little hiccups followed each little breath I took. More and more the world tilted around me. Colors stretched and blurred. Unable to focus I just stared forward. Under my fingers I could faintly feel his heart beat. Slowly the erratic rise and fall of my chest started to decrease. We stood there for what seemed to be an eternity before I finally came down from whatever the hell just happened.

"Better?" I jerked back from him. Sarutobi-kun let go of my hand. Amidst all of the worry in his eyes I saw something else. He probably thought me crazy. Scrubbing my eyes with the back of my hands I took a step back.

"S..s..sorry. I sh..should be g..g..oing now." I stuttered. "P..p..please forget anything h..h..happened."

I left Sarutobi-kun in the tree. He probably called out to me, but I really needed , that was a lie. Right now I probably needed to be around people. Instead I found myself pushing through the heavy wooden doors that led to the Senju compound. Anxiety muted as I walked the overgrown paths to where my grandfather's library of scrolls was. A list of things to do started to compile in my mind.

Should definately clean up the paths.

That roof needed patching.

I should organize all the scrolls.

All of these things could be done now. All of these things needed to be done now. Controllables. I had to focus on the controllables. Stopping half way down the path I turned and looked at a sapling that was blocking my path.

Yeah..

Yard work first.

That damn tree was going to go first.

After some scavenging in a dilapidated shed (add fixing that to the list) I found a nata and a few other tools. Carrying them to the stone path I looked around. The grass was to my hips and full of weeds. Little saplings sprouted in the most awkward of places. Numbly I moved to the nearest one and started hacking at bottom. Each downward slash became harder and hard. Feeling the wood splinter did well for my nerves.

Dirt slowly started to accumulate under my nails. a few of the tools I had chosen had to be cast to the side. One of them was so rusted on the edge it wouldn't even cut butter. The handle of two others all but crumbled in my hands as I used them. Faulty equipment aside I became the terror of all things green.

Then I happened upon a sapling that wasn't really a sapling. Wasn't really a tree either. This particular plant was twice my size and as thick as my waist.

"You… you will live to see another day." I pointed at my current nemesis. Throwing the nata in my hand on the ground I sat on one of the cracked stones of the path.

Surveying my work I felt good. Not only was I productive, but I managed to get my emotions in check. For the most part the grass was just tall enough to tickle my ankles. No annoying baby trees hung across the across the path waiting to smack me in the face.

Now…

I think it's time for a nap.

Groaning I pulled myself up and entered the musty building. Stepping over my traps I walked to a table where a small lantern was. I had a small pack of matches sitting there. Picking the box up I shook it. The lack of rattling told me I wouldn't be doing any studying tonight. There was only an hour or so of light left.

Screw it.

I was tired anyway.

Seeing as I was a trained nin one would think I wouldn't be this tired. The few hours of slaying weeds shouldn't have taxed me so. Every muscle in my body ached like I had been training for hours. Dropping the box back on the table I wandered over to my makeshift bed. I was disgusting right now, but the mess of pillows and blankets called my name. The moment I curled up in the warm mess of cotton I was out like a light.

Bubbles rushing upwards was a sound I had become familiar with in my dreams. When i heard that sound I knew what was about to happen. Mentally I cringed. I really didn't want to open my eyes. I was so sick of the nightmares. Why wouldn't they just go away! Was my subconscious really that twisted to keep torturing me like this?

Oh well, might as well prepare myself.

The moment I went to open my eyes the water rushed violently around me. I was thrown into flips and tossed around. I don' know why I even bothered, but I flailed about trying to stabilize myself. Unfortunately there's no way that I was beating an ocean. Like a cat the water batted me around like some kind of toy.

Then something weird happened.

The water spat me out.

Onto land

Face first I landed in wet sand. Little grains not only made their way into my mouth, but I could already feel them clinging to my scalp. Coughing a few times I scrubbed at the offending dirt and dragged myself away from the dark churning blue water behind me. I didn't doubt for a moment that my mind would find a way to drag me back in if it wanted to. Putting distance between the water and me was comforting. Despite the very angry ocean behind me the sky was bright and cheery. The blue seemed to stretch forever and was free of any clouds.

"Have a nice swim?" a voice chimed behind me cheerfully. My head snapped around so fast I thought my spine would snap. Was I not dreaming? I had to be dreaming? How could someone be here with me.

Lounging behind me on an odd long chair was a woman. The chair itself was extremely weird, and almost bed like. It's occupant was resting on it like a bed. Honestly, I could have dealt with the chair. This woman was an entirely different story. She was unlike anything I had ever seen. First of all, she was dressed more scandalously than any woman I had ever encountered. All she wore were two pieces of bright red cloth that covered her chest and privates. Was it a bathing suit? Who in their right mind wore a bathing suit that showed that much skin? I could see almost every inch of her pale freckled skin. On her head she wore a really floppy cream sun hat. Her bright red hair was braided similarly to mine over her right shoulder.

"Pictures last longer, pup!" the corner of her lips quirked up ever so slightly. At this point my sense returned and I was jumping to my feet. Automatically I fell into a defensive stance.

"Who are you and why are you in my dream?" I really didn't have the patience for this. The woman shifted in her long chair and let out a low whistle.

"Well, I was trying to work on my tan. You are blocking my sun." she sighed. "As for who I am that's a little more complex."

"Try me. I swear to god if you're trying to get clan secrets I won't tell you anything." she had to be some kind of genjustsu user That was the only thing that made sense. The amused look on her face twisted into confusion. I had her pegged. Then she started laughing.

"You think… wait… ha!" she pitched forward holding the middle of her stomach and let out a delighted high pitched squeal. For a good three minutes she made sounds that sounded half like words and half like grunts. When she finally calmed she seemed out of breath and rubbed her eyes. "Dear god, you think I'm a ninja after Hyuuga secrets. Thats… that's adorable. I'm not after any secrets, pup. Beside, you couldn't keep a secret from me even if you tried"

A small twitch started at the corner of my eyes. Being laughed at did not endear this woman to me. At that moment I was contemplating beating her up now and asking questions later. Grinding my teeth i did the smart thing and restrained myself. Nailing her with my best glare I watched her rub her bare stomach and stand up. She was a good deal taller than I was, but that didn't scare me.

"Damn, those are a lot creepier than I thought they'd be." she mused. I didn't falter in my posture. Aside from the twitch in my eye every muscle on my face was set in stone. Rolling her eyes she sighed. "Fine, fine, fine. I was hoping to hold off on this talk, but hell all my other plans have been shot to shit. Not to mention I need to get your ass back to reality. You might want to take a seat for this though"

"I don't really care about your plans. I'm not going to sit until you answer me." my words were clipped. "Who. Are. You."

"I am you. Shit, that sounded better when I was alone. Yup, there's the confused look." She sighed and scratched the back of her head. "At the risk of confusing you even more and sounding cryptic. I'm you from another life. Past life to be exact. Got myself offed, and now you're here…. You can call me Harper. It's nice to finally meet you Yuriko. I was getting sick of all this sneaky sneaky stuff."

"What do you mean sneaky sneaky? Nothing you're saying makes any sense." I sighed and continued to just glare at her. She walked back to her weird chair and motioned for me to sit next to her.

"Yeah, well I'm still trying to figure this out too. Come on sit down." I didn't move and she sighed. "Fine, lets cut to the chase then. You're little melt down is going to cause some problems. I don't blame you for that. That's my fault. I did this to you when I decided to take the back seat. That shit isn't going as planned. Still confused.. Yeah. So let's try this. I know a lot of things about your world. Things that suck. I wanted us to have a normal childhood. Well… as normal as possible in this place. So I've kept all of the important stuff locked off."

"The head aches… the dreams…" I felt a sickening feeling in my stomach.

"Yeah… sorry about that. You and Rin just became such good friends. I didn't want to ruin that for you. I didn't think there would be any harm… That subconscious pull though… You started having those dreams and meeting some really important people, and I might have panicked."

"Let's say I believe you. Why? Why not let me know?"

"Could you live with it? Could you keep yourself from acting? The way things pan out… are shitty, but necessary. At the very end things get better. If we mess one thing up we could throw everything into the shitter." her gaze narrowed. "It will drive you mad."

"I don't know if you've already noticed, but I'm already starting to lose my mind." I snapped. Even if she was some weird version of me I didn't like her. "Besides can't I use that to protect myself?"

"It doesn't work that way. You were not a part of the equation. I don't know what our future holds, but something tells me its not going to be sunshine and rainbows." she glanced at the water. The ocean was starting to churn and bubble. Clear blue water turned dark. "I've already kept you here too long. I'm still trying to figure this out too. What I do know is your mental break has drawn attention. People are going to start making moves."

"What people? What am I supposed to do?" she said she was going to clear things up right? All I had were a thousand more questions! I threw my arms up in irritation. She smiled and walked up to me. Strong hands rested on my shoulders. Her image changed. Skimpy clothing was replaced by a uniform of some sort. She was covered in dirt. I looked up at her eyes, and between them was a hole that leaked blood.

"I can't make these choices for you, pup. I was never good at it anyway. Just remember one thing for me… Many over the few. Village comes first." a strong push and I fell back into the water.

Noise normally didn't startle me when I was here. The buildings were old and unkept. Creaking and groaning wood was normal. Water dripped onto well placed bowls when it rained. Buildings make noise. Animal padded across the wooden walk ways. Here I was safe.

I wouldn't have woken up.

Not if it weren't for the dream.

I'd like to think I scared the life out of the ANBU that was in the room with me. He was crouched next to my little pallet with his hand hovered over my head when I shot up. To his credit the bear faced ANBU flinched only slightly. I don't think he was expecting me to wake up so suddenly.

"W..w..wei? H..h..ello B. -san." I managed to stammer out.

"You've been summoned by the Hokage."