~Anna's Point of View~
My darling, we do not need the brim of our hats to lead us to our destination. Lying next to you awake was proof enough. I was afraid I must say. Afraid of your skin which blended in with the sheets beneath you. And the house which became alive at night, appearing in a different light of the moon each morning. But I was not one to easily reach forward, announcing my sounds of comfort. I did not need to hear your voice though. For I could hear you. Even when all I saw were your words written down, I could hear you.
And as you lye next to me I realized what it was like to have your shadow sewn to you. Constantly dragging along every part of yourself in a sense of darkness.
My fingers ran through his hair, and I sat up knowing that the birds would chirp loudly at exactly 4:00 am. Or soon in this case. I made my way to the front of the bed, admiring the dim light which leaked through the curtain. Until I made eye contact with his desk of course. A feather pen and blank sheet lye in front of his chair, and I could not resist the temptation. Stepping on the balls of my feet first, I walked gently and quietly over to his desk.
There are creases that have formed near your eyes. My darling, you are tired.
Your skin is paper white and sensitive. My darling, you are hesitant.
Your hands shake when you hold your fork at the dinner table. My darling, you are overwrought.
The light beneath your door disappears at a later hour. My darling, you are occupied.
And I know that you dress yourself in the mornings now.
And I know that you speak loudly so I feel the need to sit on the opposite end of the dinner table.
And I know your lights go off so late so that I cannot bother to ask you questions.
But you are breaking me Ciel Phantomhive.
You promised you would not break me.
And I promised myself six months.
Six months until I would leave this manor.
Six months to allow myself to forget everything.
Everything from the lacing of your shoes, to the comfort I now find in the grandfather clock to which I used to find annoyance in.
I lace up your shoes.
You lace up my complications.
I fell too quickly.
So quickly that I could not see the stick lying in front of me.
The one that I snatched when I grabbed my tears, and blanket, drawing a faded line between what I defined as isolation.
I said I loved you.
But do you love me?
- Anna
I put the pen down and smiled at him, sleeping innocently. So different from his waking personality. Oh how I wish I could stay longer. Stay longer in his arms, where I could pretend. Where I could pretend I was not going to drag him down to hell with me. And where I could pretend that I was more than a pawn.
More than just a piece of his game.
So I walked out of his room, into the dark corridor. And when I entered my room I grabbed my dark brown suitcase. One that Mey Rin had given me on the day of arrival. She had told me that I would most likely be traveling with the young master, and I would need one. I stuffed clothes, pictures, and letters that I had written into it. And I locked it without second thought. I pushed open my door, placing the key in front of the room, hoping that Mey Rin or Sebastian would find it.
But as I looked back before I walked out the front doors of the manor, the light of the day brought in a flood of memories.
Sitting in the kitchen of the manor when I was first transported.
Learning how to dance with Ciel, despite us both being quite bad.
And I saw something I had never seen before.
A reflection of myself. Walking fearfully up the stairs of the Phantomhive manor when I told Sebastian that I was looking for a boy named Ciel Phantomhive.
The boy I barely knew nothing about.
The boy I had grown close to.
The boy I loved with all of my heart.
So I stepped forward, not looking back.
Farwell, Ciel Phantomhive.