Chapter Twenty-Five

Thank you, loving and kind reviewers! I appreciate you all!

I got a chapter up quickly! I hope you are all very happy! Unfortunately, this is a short chapter. It's a little tricky to follow, so PM me any questions that you have, and I'll answer them. Thanks!

This chapter is weird. Just a heads-up, know that all the weirdness is inside Maggie's head.

Important fact about this chapter (notice it is not italicized and underlined, making it important, but not tremendously so): This chapter starts while Maggie is upstairs when she went to sleep during breakfast. I just wanted to make sure that was nice and cleared up so that my readers did not have giant question marks floating over their heads. Although that would be funny, (laughs quietly). Here you go, chapter twenty-five!

Maggie's point of view:

One minute, Henry was laughing at my oatmeal. I was trying not to laugh, but was about to let a burst go. Then, much to my shock, something changed. An invisible wall shot up between me and everyone else. I knew it wasn't there. I knew that it wasn't real. But somehow, it kept the emotion from reaching me. I couldn't laugh. I was distanced. Separated, and I was frightened. "Please stop laughing about my food," I pleaded. I tried to sound happy. I hated this. It was frightening.

"Okay, okay," Henry agreed. They stopped, much to my relief. I was afraid to lift up my head. The fear was the only thing I could feel. Their happiness was distanced. Something in me wanted to scream, but I held it back. I kept my head down for a bit, before feeling someone touch my shoulder.

"Hey, Mags, you okay?" Jasper asked. A lot of thoughts ran through my mind. Not Jasper. Please, Jasper, don't. I love you. I know I do. I just can't feel it anymore. You're so far away, do you know that? I can feel you, but you're beyond the wall. I don't know what's happening.

Of course, I couldn't say that. They'd know I was losing my mind then. So I lied. "I don't feel so well. I'm going to lie down. I want to sleep." I had to get away from there. I was going to go insane.

"You haven't eaten anything," Henry objected. Henry, please. Let me go. Please. Help. Me.

"I'll eat later," I promised. I stood from the table and swayed a little. Regaining my balance, I climbed the stairs before anyone could follow me, eventually making it to my room. I sat down on my bed and put my head between my knees despite the ache. Snap out of it, snap out of it. You're okay. Just calm down, maybe it's the medication that's doing this. Yeah. Sure. Ha. Good one.

I pulled my head back up and lay down on my bed, trying to think. I thought of Jasper. Deep down, in my memories, I knew that I loved him. But I couldn't feel it. It was though a shield had been made between me and everyone else. Their happiness could not get to me. And my feelings couldn't come out. I couldn't feel anything except pain and fear.

I wondered if I should tell them that I was crazy. I couldn't do it. I couldn't admit that I was losing my mind. Just wait, it'll go away. It has to. If it doesn't, I'll tell them. I will. Really, I will.

Rolling onto my uninjured side, I closed my eyes, praying for sleep. Downstairs I could hear quiet laughter, and I began to cry, much to my disgust. Brushing the tears out of my eyes, I covered my ears with my hands so that I couldn't hear the laughter that represented the joy that I could no longer experience. Go to sleep, go to sleep, please, please, please Maggie, please, please. Just go to sleep.

I awoke awhile later. Grabbing a piece of paper and a pencil, I began to write.

December 21

Today I realised I'm losing my mind. I can't feel anything. Something is going wrong in my head. I know I love him, but I can't feel the love anymore. I can feel pain and fear. I'm going to go even crazier if this doesn't stop. I feel like I'm going to break into little pieces. I'm not going to tell anyone yet. I've been nothing but a worry lately. I'm going to wait awhile and see if this stops. I'll tell them if it doesn't.

I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and I shoved the piece of paper between my mattress and my headboard. I faced away from the door, lying down as though I was asleep.

"Maggie?" Jasper asked, opening my door. "You said we should wake you up after awhile?" He came over to me and tapped me gently.

"Mmm?" I mumbled, giving the impression that I was asleep. Another lie, I hated it.

"You said to wake you up?" He sounded concerned. I felt horrible.

"Oh, yes, thank you, Jasper." I smiled a fake smile at him, praying he wouldn't notice. He gave me a genuine smile back. Something stabbed at my heart, and I winced.

"Your head," he asked. Why did he have to be so darn perceptive?

"What? Oh, yeah. It's sore. Let's go downstairs." I hated the lie. Lies, I had told too many today.

Jasper let me use his shoulder for support when I was coming down the stairs. I saw Henry and Whitney looking at me, and I gave them another of my lovely fake smiles. Whitney smiled back at me, but Henry gave me an odd look. Oh no. Please, Henry. Stay out of this. I can't keep lying.

"Hey, Mags," he said, sounding cheerful and happy. "Want your oatmeal? I'll heat it."

That was sweet of him. "Sure, Henry," I agreed. He headed to the kitchen. I decided to follow him. "I'm not sure I trust you with the microwave," I added, smiling another of my fake smiles.

He smiled back, but it seemed a little strained. "Sure, sure," He agreed as we got to the kitchen. He stuck my oatmeal in the microwave and set the time for it. "Are you doing alright?" he asked.

"Of course," I said. My voice shook a little, and I winced. Great, just great, now he'll know.

"You sure," he demanded, looking at me in the very intense way he had.

"Henry," I said. "I'm fine, my head just hurts." I got my oatmeal. "Thanks, I'll eat this in the living room," I told him, desperate to get away.

"No problem," he said. I escaped out of the room and sat on the couch. Jasper headed into the kitchen, and soon returned. I ate my oatmeal in small bites. No one could make me talk if I was eating.

"Is Henry okay?" Whitney asked Jasper. I stiffened a little. Had Henry told Jasper? Would he tell Whitney? I choked a little on my oatmeal, and Whitney thumped me on the back, still waiting for Jasper's response.

"Yeah, he said he's just tired. He didn't sleep well last night; I don't think he likes sleeping bags."

Whitney laughed at that, and I gave a weak smile. He hadn't told Jasper. He had lied, just the way I had.

Glancing at the door, I wondered if I could run somewhere and escape from this.

I shook my head a little.

No.

Just face it, you're insane.

Maybe I should tell them.

No, I shouldn't. There is no running.

No running from these lies.