Dear Tylese: Ok, let me start by saying boys are difficult to understand. I only just turned fifteen, and I have never had a boyfriend. What I write, are my opinions on love entirely based on what I read and personal observations from the people around me. It could be that he was just teasing you back. Or, he could like you. Or, he could have actually been offended by that but played it off like he was teasing, and he may or may not like you. Similar things have happened in my life, and I never know how to read into the feelings. All guys are different, but equally confusing for a girl to read. Same as us girls are confusing for a guy to read. Don't take it too personally. Just hope everything works out, and if there's someone else you trust to tell this to that may have experience with boys, I suggest you ask them. I'm sorry :/
Also, I am very interested to hear your story idea :)
Ali6132 (Guest): Thank you so much for your review. And no, I cannot blame you at all for forgetting some of the OC's. I put way too many in my story from the beginning, but I don't have the heart to kill them off or get rid of them. And yes, cancer has affected many that I love in similar ways. Some lived, and some haven't. My grandfather died of cancer, and my old third grade teacher has it, as well as a little girl whose mom my aunt worked with. And another teacher's mom. Please, everyone pray for them and everyone who has cancer.
I don't own Austin & Ally
Ella's POV
When I woke up this morning, it took me a minute to remember everything that happened yesterday. Toby's lame text, saying he wasn't going to pick me up; my parents leaving with just a note telling me to feed the kids; wondering where Toby was at school; Derek trying to calm me down; the counselor coming in; Aunt Claire….
And Toby. I jumped up when I remembered Toby. He'd came over last night...or was it early this morning? I couldn't remember, but I know he was here, and that he was crying. And I know he slept over.
But he wasn't here now.
I jumped out of bed and raced out of my room. The first thing I noticed was that no one was home. Again, there was a note on the refrigerator. My parents said they were very sorry but there was an emergency with one of their cast mates in L.A. Apparently, she was worse off than Aunt Claire, and they had to be there for her. The twins went with them.
And Toby still wasn't here.
"Don't panic," I said into the empty house. "He could be at home."
But I seriously doubt it.
I ran upstairs once more, just to see if he possibly left any clues of where he went. And that's when I saw the note.
Of course. Everyone leaves notes in this family. Why can't someone just tell me when they're leaving? They know I'll nod and go right back to sleep!
I sighed and started reading his note. My heart stopped.
Ella,
Gone to the tracks. Sorry I left so early. Got a lot on my mind. Need to race. Don't worry, I'm fine. If you need anything, call Derek.
Love, Toby.
He's at the race track. It's not like he doesn't go there often; he's there a lot on his free time. But something about his note….he didn't seem like himself. Something was wrong. I could feel it in my heart.
Without really thinking about it, I rushed down the stairs and into the living room where I shoved my feet into some boots, grabbed my jacket and rushed out the door, dragging my purse and keys along with me. I don't even care that I'm still wearing my pajamas.
I drove faster than I ever drove before, I think, and I'm pretty sure I nearly got a ticket. I probably would have if there hasn't have been a red light and I could start slower when it turned green.
But once I was out of the cop's sight, I sped off again. I made it to the race track at least five minutes faster than I should have, even going fast.
There weren't any parking places when I got there, so I just parked on the road. I don't care if my car gets towed or if I get a major ticket.
I left my purse in my car (a risky move with this many people here, but I don't care) and took off running toward the gates. They know me here. They didn't even ask for a ticket. Toby got me a season pass.
"Toby, gotta find Toby," I muttered, pushing through the crowds.
I know I ran into at least ten people in my haste to get the the edge of the tracks. The grumbled in protest, and I know several of them were shouting curses at me, but I didn't care. There were so many people….I just had to get to Toby. That was all I could think of.
Finally, I made it though the gates to the tracks….just in time to see a familiar car fly off the track. It flipped several times before landing in a heap on the sidelines where no one was standing.
"TOBY!" I screamed, my heart lurching in my chest. I wasn't even aware I was running until I stumbled to the ground by the driver's side of the car, frantically trying to see inside. But the car was so unrecognizable in shape…..
Suddenly there were hands on my arm, yanking me back. I screamed and thrashed, yelling Toby's name, but it was to no avail.
"No, Toby!" I screamed. "Please, he's...he's got to be okay! Please let me help him!"
"You're only making this worse," someone growled in my ear and pushed me hard to the ground. "Stay back."
"Please!" I screamed, tears streaming down my face. "Toby!"
First responders were there, and I could see them hauling Toby's limp body out of the car. I screamed again, and felt my head spinning. This couldn't be happening. This could not be happening!
Time seemed to stop as I watched them place him on a stretcher and place a mask over his face. There was blood, and his clothes were torn in places. And there I was, sitting helpless on the grass, clutching the jacket he gave me around my arms so tight that I think I was starting to bleed where my nails dug in, but I couldn't have cared.
"Miss," Someone said, stepping in front of me. It was a lady, probably in her twenties, with her blonde hair slicked back in a tight ponytail. She was grabbing at my hands, trying to get me off the ground. I barely noticed her. "Miss, please. I need you to tell me who this is, how you are related to him, and it would be nice if you could fill out some information. Are his parents here?"
Only one thing stuck in my mind. She thinks I'm related to him.
I looked at her quickly. "Can I ride in the ambulance?" I asked, my eyes wide. "Please? I'll give you all the information you need. He was here by himself."
"Okay," she said quickly. "You aren't related to him, are you?"
"His mom is my aunt," I said automatically. She smiled at me.
"Then you're related. Come on." She helped me stand up and put an arm around me as we walked to the ambulance. The sight was terrible.
"I think I'm going to be sick," I whispered. I couldn't even see Toby, but seeing all kinds of equipment and Toby's bloody clothes scattered about….I never imagined an ambulance would look like this.
"Here," the lady said, handing me a trash can. I was grateful for that seconds later. Apparently a lot of people get sick in ambulances.
I don't even remember the rest of the ride to the hospital. It's all a blur to me. I remember being sick in a trashcan, and then….just nothing. But now, I'm pacing around the hospital waiting room, and I have no idea what's about to happen.
I'm all alone. Mom and Dad, along with Maddie, Aunt Trish, and Uncle Dez, all took off to attend to the emergency...wherever they said they were going. But for some reason, they took the kids. At least I don't have to worry about them.
Not only are they gone, but Uncle Daryl, Porter, and Hunter are all off on some police assignment. Kelsey is off at a convention for theatre, and she took Alyssa with her.
Grandma and Grandpa are out of town, apparently talking to someone about how to raise money for Aunt Claire.
And of course Aunt Claire is here, in the hospital, but there's no way I could add this stress on her.
Thinking about it, there was really only two people I could call that would be considered family.
"Hello?" Aiden said when he picked up the phone.
"A-A-Aiden," I sobbed.
"Ella? Honey, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Aiden was now very alert.
"Toby," was all I could say. I hadn't realized I was crying this hard until I couldn't answer any of Aiden's questions.
"Ella, what happened? What's wrong with Toby?" Aiden asked frantically.
"He-He…."
"Ella, baby, please. You gotta talk to me honey. What happened?"
"H-Hospital."
"We'll be there in ten minutes," he said, and hung up.
"Good," I whispered, watching with a strange sense of detachment as my phone slipped through my fingers and clattered to the floor. Several people turned in surprise, but for the life of me I couldn't figure out what they were staring at.
"Ella," one of the nurses said ,looking at me strangely. I know that I know her from somewhere, but I don't know where. Maybe she's one of Dr. Murphy's bunch?
"Hmm?"
"Honey, you dropped your phone. I think it might be broken."
I looked over at my phone in her hands, the screen cracked. "So that's what people were staring at," I muttered to myself.
The nurse lady looked at me worriedly, and even laid a hand to my forehead. "Baby, are you okay?"
I looked at her again, and I could not focus. Her face was a blur.
"Ella!"
I turned just in time to see Aiden and Terra, God bless them, running through the doors.
"Ella, what happened?" Terra asked, already out of breath. Did they run all the way here?
"T-T-Toby," I said, trying not to burst into tears again. I had stopped crying when I got off the phone with them, but that's when shock took over. The numb sensation was oddly comforting, but now it's gone and I know I'm gonna start crying again.
"Yes, we got that honey. What about Toby?" Terra asked urgently.
"H-His car f-f-flipped on the t-track," I said, and that's when the tears came again.
"Oh gosh," Aiden said, and pulled me in his arms. "It's okay, baby. He'll be okay. Don't worry."
"You didn't see him flip!" I sobbed. "He was so upset about Aunt Claire last night, and he just left without saying anything, and flipped his car!"
Terra let out a choked noise and put a hand up to her mouth.
"Is he okay?" she asked the nurse, who I'm almost positive is actually one of Dr. Murphy's kids.
"I don't know," she whispered, looking at us all in despair. "I wish I could tell y'all something, but my dad hasn't said a thing. If he did, I would tell you, I promise."
"Thank you," Terra said quietly. Dr. Murphy's daughter, whichever one she might be, nodded and walked away.
"I'm so scared," I whispered, clutching onto Aiden even tighter.
"I know," he sighed. "I know."
Third person POV
Aiden glanced at Ella as he dialed Austin's number. She was now sitting in one of the hospital chairs in the waiting room, and Terra had her arms around her. Ella wasn't speaking. She kept going in and out of shock. When she wasn't in shock, she was freaking out.
"Hey Aiden, what's up? And can you make it quick, we kind of have a-"
"Austin," Aiden cut him off. "You and Ally and Maddie need to get down here right now."
Austin was alert now. "Why, what happened?"
"What's going on?" Aiden could hear Ally ask in the background.
"Toby was in a wreck," Aiden said, closing his eyes as he did. "We don't know how bad it is. They won't tell us."
"Is Ella okay? My gosh Aiden, was she in the car?" Austin asked, now panicked.
"She wasn't in the car, Austin. Toby crashed on the race tracks," Aiden said, feeling guilty as he said it, but the news was inevitable now. Toby really didn't want anyone knowing he raced.
"So she's okay?" Austin asked, the tension easing slightly from his voice, but he still sounded panicked.
Aiden looked over at Ella again, and noticed she'd started crying all over again Terra was frantically trying to calm her down.
"I wouldn't say that," Aiden grimaced. "She's a mess, Austin. Please, y'all have to get here soon. I think something's majorly wrong with Toby, and Ella is a total wreck. She keeps crying, and when she's not, she goes into shock. Terra and I keep trying to calm her down, but it's not working and we're the only other ones that are here. Please, I'm begging you."
"Ally, get Maddie and the twins and get in the car," Austin said. "Aiden, don't worry, we'll be there soon. Dear God, let that kid be okay."
"Yes, these kids need all the prayers they can get. Thanks Austin," Aiden said and hung up.
"Kids," a voice said from behind them. Aiden turned and saw Dr. Murphy. He didn't know if that was a good or bad thing.
"Is he okay?" Ella demanded, launching herself at the doctor and grabbing the lapels of his coat before Aiden or Terra could do anything to stop her.
"We don't know yet honey. We still have to check a lot of things out before we know for sure. But he should recover. Don't worry. We just don't know when he'll wake up. It could be a few hours, or it could be a few weeks."
"Weeks?" All the color had drained from Ella's face.
"We really don't know Ella," Dr. Murphy said, patting her shoulder. "You can go see him if you want to."
Ella practically ran to the room. Terra moved to follow, but Aiden held her back. "Let her have some time alone first," he said.
Terra nodded. "You're right. I just hope he'll be okay. For everyone. It will just kill Ella if he's not alright."
"She loves him," Aiden said quietly. "Ter, if it was you in there….I don't know what I'd do. When you love someone, this is the last place you ever want to see them."
Terra looked up at him, her eyes shining. With love or unshed tears, Aiden couldn't be sure.
"Aiden, that is so sweet. If it was you, I would probably hide in the supply closet."
Aiden let out a shaky laugh. "Like when Ella smacked Toby over the head with a frying pan."
"Huh," Terra said considerably. "Yep, exactly like that."
"Let's hope that never has to happen," Aiden said, wrapping his arms around her. Terra laid her head on his chest.
"It better not, Aiden Moon, or I will hate you forever."
Aiden just smiled. "I wouldn't expect any less from you."
"Toby," Ella gasped out when she was finally able to see him. There were cuts and bruises all over his body. He had a bandage wrapped around his head, and his left eye was swollen. There was a green cast on his left leg, and his left wrist was bandaged up.
His left side seemed to have taken the majority of the damage, but his ribs were wrapped up on his right side, making Ella think a few of them might be broken.
He looked so different, yet he was still her Toby. The only thing was, he wasn't awake. Even in sleep, Ella could usually see the energy vibrating from his body. Now he seemed drained and broken.
Dr. Murphy said he might not wake up for a while, but that he would almost certainly recover. Almost was not enough for Ella. Not when they were talking about Toby, her best friend. Toby, the boy she loved.
Toby.
"Oh Toby," Ella said shaking her head. "Why on earth would you do this to yourself?"
Ella wiped impatiently at a tear that slipped down her cheek. She did not want to cry in front of him, asleep or not.
She took a seat in the chair next to his bed and grabbed his hand. It felt cold to the touch, not at all like the warm hand that sent shivers up her spine every time she touched it.
"The last time I sat in a chair with you in a hospital bed, it was my fault," Ella sniffed. "I guess Rapunzel* really does have brown hair. But at least you were awake then."
Glancing down once more at her best friend, a flood of memories seem to shoot through her mind. Some good, some bad, but all involved Toby….
"Kelsey, quit pushing me!" Ella heard someone yell just after her Daddy and Uncle Dez ran out of the room. She looked at her mother who shrugged with a smile.
After a minute or two, her daddy and uncle walked back in, followed by a woman about the same age as her grandmother, and a little boy. She thought she had heard her Daddy call him Toby.
Ella stared. She'd never really met any kids her own age before. She was almost always around adults. So seeing a boy her own age was a huge shock.
And there was something about him that made her smile.
Maybe it was the fact that, at age five, Ella was very into princesses, and learned that every princess ended up marrying a prince. And since everyone else she'd ever met was so much older than her, Ella thought this boy who was her own age might just be her prince.
But then there was the thought that this boy might be related to her somehow, because her Daddy just called the little boy's mommy his aunt…..
"Hey Daddy, am I related to Toby," Ella asked, turning towards her daddy. He would give her the answers she wanted to know.
He gave her a funny look. "No, why Sunshine?"
Ella smiled. Yay, she wasn't related to him! He had to be her prince! "Oh, no reason."
"Hey Ella-I mean Starr, I have some cars in my room, wanna play?" Toby asked.
"Sure!" Ella grinned, and they ran off to his bedroom.
That was the first time she'd ever seen her best friend, though she didn't know it at the time. She thought he would be her prince….and twelve years later, he just might be.
Ella smiled at the memory. It seemed like so long ago, when her family had been on the run from her birth family, and had to take on fake names. That was the situation she was in when she met Toby, and yet he still dealt with her. He'd still treated her no differently than he'd treat any other friend he might make.
And he really did turn out to be her prince, even if at the time her hopes about that had turned into what she thought was reality. That princess movies were for little kids, and that you couldn't meet the love of your life at five years old, and stay together until you died. She thought she was being reasonable, only wanting to be best friends. And he was her best friend. But it just turned into something more, something so much more than she'd ever dreamed of when she'd sat in his family's vacation home in Tennessee and wished for her prince.
And now her prince was in a hospital bed, Ella thought looking down at their hands. She hoped she would have the chance to feel as happy as she had when they'd reunited after being kidnapped. Then, they'd hugged each other so tight, Ella couldn't breathe. He'd freaked out when he found out what happened, but she remembered calming him down by saying they could play with cars.
They were always playing with cars, Ella recalled. And that had led Toby to believe he wanted to be a racecar driver. Which ultimately led them to where they were now. In the hospital.
Another memory came to her mind then, this one from her sixth birthday came, and a flood of others along with it.
"Toby, look what my Daddy got me!" Ella had screamed, running off to find her best friend and show him the very special sunshine necklace her daddy had picked out just for her.
"Wow," Toby said, looking at the necklace Ella shoved in his face. "That's pretty. I don't think you'll like my gift."
"Oh please," Ella laughed. "You're my best friend. Of course I will."
"If you say so," Toby said, pulling out a small package from his jacket pocket. It was wrapped in newspaper, with duck-tape holding it together.
"Aunt Claire doesn't know about this, does she?" Ella giggled. Toby smiled.
"Nope. I wanted to get you something just from me. She thinks my present to you is the one with all our names on it, but this one is just from me."
Ella smiled wider as she ripped into the paper Toby had done a terrible job at wrapping her present with. But she didn't say anything. They were six, and it made it special that he wrapped it.
"You got me a car?" Ella asked, grinning as she looked up at Toby.
He shrugged. "We always play cars together. I know it's a boy's toy, but…."
"I love it," Ella said hugging him. "Let's go show my parents!"
"I'm gonna get you!" Ella yelled as she chased her best friend onto the school playground. The two had adjusted well in their first month and a half of first grade considering they'd never been to school before.
Toby was running away from her because he'd snatched up Ella's bag of pickle chips. Everybody knows you don't steal Ella Dawson Moon's pickle chips and get away with it. So Ella did the only thing any normal seven year old child would do when someone takes their things-she chased him.
"Na, na, na, na, na, you'll never catch me!" Toby yelled back in a sing-song voice as he continued running away from her. By this point Ella was panting as she tried to keep up with her best friend. To Ella, it wasn't a fair chase. He was a boy!
"Ya huh!" Ella screamed, but even she knew she never would be able to catch him. He was way faster than her and had a lot more energy than she did. Ella was already exhausted.
"No way," Toby laughed and sped up. Ella sighed as she watched him run away, and she eventually just stopped and sat down on the ground, breathing hard. "You're gonna lose! You're gonna-Ella?"
When Toby turned around, he realized his best friend as no longe behind him. Knowing everything they'd been through, Toby thought anything could have happened. He quickly began looking around the playground and eventually found her sitting on the clay ground with her back against the slide. She had her hand pressed to her chest, and she looked paler than usual.
"Ells! Ella, are you okay?" Toby asked, dropping to his knees beside her. Ella shook her head. She was breathing hard, and couldn't really speak at the moment. "What do I do? Do I need to get the teacher?"
Ella nodded. She'd never really had a heart spell before. Her heart had raced, but her parents had alway been there to tell her to sit down before it got too fast, and it always slowed down. She had no idea what to do when it was this fast.
Toby took off running. "Mrs. Salter!" he yelled, letting his legs carry him faster than ever before. The teacher turned towards the little boy with wide eyes.
"What's wrong sweetie?" she asked in a kind voice.
"Ella got hurt. Her heart hurts," Toby said in a panicked voice. "She's got a heart problem. Call her parents. Do something!"
The teacher's eyes widened and she started running in the direction Toby pointed. Toby, God bless the small child, wasn't even a step behind her.
"Sweetie, are you okay? What hurts?" Mrs. Salter asked when she found her.
"It feels a little better now," Ella said, looking back and forth between Toby and her teacher. "And nothing hurts. I just got tired and I couldn't run and I had to sit down cause my heart was beating super fast."
"Has it happened before?" Mrs. Salter asked, still worried, but in a much softer tone.
"It's been fast before, but I just learned a year ago that I had it. Can I just use my phone to call my Mommy and Daddy?" Ella asked, her voice pleading.
"O-Okay…" the teacher said slowly. She didn't know the first-grader had a cellphone. "Of course you can. I will be over here if you need anything."
"Mommy?" Ella said when Ally answered the phone.
"Ella? Honey, why are you calling? I told you not to do that during school," Ally said, sounding stressed. Ella could hear one or both of the babies crying in the background. Ella sniffed. "Are you crying?"
"She's crying?" Ella heard her Daddy's panicked voice ask.
"Mommy, can you and Daddy come to school and get me? I'm on the playground and I think I had a heart spell," Ella said, and when she glanced over at Toby-who was still holding her hand-she could see his worried look. He looked as if he might pass out.
"We're on our way," Ally said and hung up.
When Ella put her phone away, she looked over at Toby and raised her eyebrows. "You okay there?"
"I shouldn't have taken your chips," Toby said immediately. He couldn't believe she was asking if HE was okay.
"Sure you should've," Ella laughed. "I take your stuff all the time."
"But I don't have a heart problem!" Toby all-but-yelled. Ella flinched. "You can't hurt me, Ella, but it's so easy for me to hurt you, and I don't even mean to do it!"
"You didn't hurt me!" Ella screamed back. "You're my best friend! You could never, ever hurt me. It's not like it's your fault I have a heart problem-"
"Why can't they just give you a new heart?" Toby asked, cutting her off.
Ella rolled her eyes. "Because I don't need one, doofus. And it doesn't work that way. My heart is fast. That's it. There's nothing else wrong with it. I don't need a new heart. That's for people who could die without it. The worst part about my heart problem is that I have to sit down."
"But….but why?" Toby asked in a whiney voice. "I don't like seeing you hurt."
Ella smiled and laid her head on his shoulder. Toby brought his arms around her and held her there, scared to let go.
"Other people need hearts more than me, Toby," Ella said quietly.
"But you're….you," Toby said as if that made a different.
Ella giggled. "Yes, I'm me. But that doesn't mean anything. I'm not going to die, Toby. Do you understand that."
She took his face in her hands and squished it between her hands. Toby was forced to look at her in the eye. He nodded.
"Ella!"
Ella and Toby turned around just in time to see Austin and Ally running towards them. Austin had Emma strapped to his back, and Ally had Evan strapped to her chest. The twins were almost a year old, and were bouncing all over the place as their parents ran. It was a funny sight.
"Hi Mommy. Hi Daddy," Ella said when they got over to them.
"Sunshine, are you okay? Does it hurt?" Austin asked immediately, kneeling down beside Ella on the opposite side of where Toby was still clutching her hand.
"I just had to sit down because my heart got fast," Ella said.
"It's my fault. I made her run," Toby said looking down.
"Shut up," Ella said rolling her eyes. "I forgot I wasn't supposed to run, so I started chasing him. Does that actually sound like it's his fault in any way?"
"No baby," Ally laughed. Her baby was okay if she still had her attitude. And she was defending Toby. "It's not Toby's fault."
"But I-," Toby started.
"Toby Grayson Bentley," Ella said in a warning voice. Everyone laughed.
When Toby and Ella were twelve, Toby seemed to be an early riser while Ella refused to wake up. So, frustrated with trying a bunch of new methods to wake up their oldest daughter in the mornings, Austin and Ally finally just asked Toby to wake his best friend up.
"Ells, wake up!" Toby yelled as soon as he opened the door, and he ran into the room and jumped on the bed, rolling onto Ella's much smaller body. Toby had hit a growth spurt about a year and a half before, and he was at least a head taller than Ella. He still hadn't filled into his true size yet, though, so it left him looking lanky.
Ella groaned at the extra weight on top of her, and she knew immediately who it was and why he was trying to wake her up. Well, she wasn't about to give her parents the satisfaction.
So, Ella simply rolled over, ignoring him completely.
"Awe, come on Ella-bella," Toby said in a baby voice. "Don't make me tickle you."
Ella's eyes flew open, and not because of the stupid nicknames. You never, ever wanted to get in a tickle fight with Toby. You can never win.
"Don't you dare," she said sternly. Toby had an evil grin on his face as he brought his hand up. "Toby…"
"Are you going to get up?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"No!" declared the idiotic, stubborn part of her.
"Okay," Toby shrugged and brought his hands down, pinning her body to the bed where his knees straddled either side of her hips so she couldn't escape.
Ella shrieked with laughter. "TOBY!" she yelled, and pushed at him, but he was too strong for her. He went on relentlessly, his hands somehow finding ALL of her tickle spots.
"Toby! Stop, stop!" she screamed, and now he had her wrists bound together at her side and she was thrashing back and forth. "TOBY!"
At one point Ella thought she heard the door open, but she was too busy fighting off Toby to see who came in.
"No one shall save the beautiful maiden from her devilishly handsome captivator!" he declared.
"Oh no sir, please let me be," Ella begged through her fits of laughter. "My virtue is precious!"
"Oh my gosh, you did not!" Toby roared, and literally fell on top of her. She could feel him laughing.
"Of course I did, sir. Please, let me keep my innocence. Leave me alone, dear man, I beg of you!" Ella said dramatically. Toby dropped his head on her shoulder.
"Ella Christine Dawson Moon, you will be the absolute death of me," he said, and finally released her. Something in Ella snapped and she rolled onto her knees before pouncing on Toby's back, sending them both sprawling to the ground.
"Well hello," Toby said in a strained voice from beneath her.
"Hi," Ella giggled.
It was only then they noticed Ally, Maddie, and Aunt Claire laughing at them from the doorway.
"Where is she?" Ella could hear Toby demand from all the way downstairs. She buried her face farther down into the pillows just as the door banged open.
"Ella, what the heck did he do to you?" Toby asked in an angry voice as he stood leaning against the doorway, his fists clenched so hard that his knuckles were turning white.
Ella rolled onto her back and pulled the covers over her face.
"I should have known he'd never like me," Ella said from under the covers. "A guy like that would never like an ugly freak like me."
"What?"
There was the sound of a crash, and suddenly rough hands were yanking the covers away from her face and holding her down by the shoulders.
"What did you just say?" he asked again.
Ella blinked up at her best friend. "You heard me," she mumbled, dropping her gaze. "Everybody knows it. I'm a weirdo. A loser. I never wear makeup. I wear jeans and a t-shirt almost everyday. I always have a book or a notebook in my hands….how stupid could I be? No one wants that."
"Shut. Up." Toby was literally shaking with rage. "Ella Moon, if I ever hear those words come out of your mouth again, I will drag you out of this room and throw you to the top of the jungle-gym at the playground you're so scared of until your sane mind comes back."
Ella stared at im in silence for a total of five seconds before bursting into tears.
"Oh, Ella." Toby's voice softened. He reached out to touch her, but Ella flinched away, yanking the covers back from him and pulling them over her face.
"Leave me alone!" she cried.
Toby's heart broke, but he didn't listen to her. Instead, he pulled the covers up just enough to slide into the bed beside her, and he lowered it back onto their heads.
"Star," Toby said, using the childhood nickname he'd given her. He put his hand on her cheek. "Do you know what I see when I look at you?"
"A clown?" Ella asked bitterly. Toby scrunched up his nose.
"Gosh, no. I hate clowns," he said, and then raised her chin up so she had no choice but to look into his eyes. "I see a girl who's real. I see my best friend, who is more beautiful on the inside and out than any other girl I've ever seen in my life. I see a girl who doesn't need any makeup because her natural beauty shines through-something no one would want to ruin with a layer of paint. I see a girl that knows her own style and doesn't want to go around parading in a tank-top and mini-skirt like all the sluts at our school-" Ella laughed at this. "-and likes to look good as herself. I see someone who recognizes the beauty in words on a page. I see an amazingly talented writer who can create a whole world out of one small idea. I see the smartest, funniest most amazing person in the world. I see you, Ella. And you're my best friend, so it hurts me when you say such horrible things about yourself, because I see how amazing you are. Why can't you?"
"Yeah right. Toby, you have to say that because you're my best friend," Ella mumbled, but she was blushing.
"No, I have to say that because it's the truth, and best friends always tell each other the truth," Toby said firmly.
"Well then why doesn't he like me?" Ella blinked up at him, tears glistening in her eyes. "Is it because my inner evil shines through and he's scared I'm gonna be just like my birth parents?"
Toby threw his head back and groaned into the pillow he was laying on. "Ella, you are not evil. Blood doesn't matter, remember? Brody's just an idiot."
"Brody!" Ella cried again, rolling over until her face was pressed up against Toby's chest and his arms were around her.
"Dang girl, when you fall, you fall hard," Toby said, rubbing her back. "It's only been two weeks since you first saw the guy. What did he say to you?"
"He said, 'Move out of the way, nerd', and pushed me into the lockers when I was just trying to read. I wasn't even in his way!"
"I'll kill him," Toby said, starting to sit up. Ella grabbed his arm.
"No, stay here," she said, cuddling back up to him. Toby sighed and snaked his arms back around her. "When am I ever going to have my first kiss?"
"Ella, we're fourteen. We have plenty of time to have our first kiss," Toby said. Then he cleared his throat due to her strange look. "Kisses. First kisses. We have many years before it's just weird."
Ella snorted. "But I want it now."
"We could kiss," Toby suggested before even thinking about it.
Ella's eyes widened. "Toby, no…"
"Think about it," he said. "You want your first kiss. Well, so do I. We're already friends…"
"But it should be with someone-," Ella started, but cut herself off. Someone you cared for? She cared for Toby more than anyone else. Someone you loved? She loved him more than words could express. He was her best friend.
"Special?" Toby asked. "Someone special? Aren't I special to you?"
"Of course you are!" Ella exclaimed. "I love you more than anyone else in the world! That's why I'm saying no. When best friends kiss, one or the other or both always end up liking the other and someone will get hurt. I don't want to risk it."
"Okay," Toby laughed and kissed her forehead. Ella blinked. "I just wanted to see our reaction."
"You suck," Ella said and smacked him in the face with a pillow.
Ella looked down at Toby now. She would give anything to go back to that moment-any of those moments really. She had so many chances to realize her feelings for him. So many chances to act on it.
And now he may never know how she felt about him. He may never know how much she loved him. That was what was so heartbreaking.
Ella honestly didn't know how she'd ever live if Toby was gone…
"Ella, honey, I need to check his vitals and such. Can you step outside for a minute?" Dr. Murphy asked, walking in the room.
Ella nodded and got up, sending one last glance Toby's way. Dr. Murphy put a hand on Ella's shoulder as she passed.
"We're doing everything we can, sweetie," he said. Ella nodded again and left the room.
She stood right outside the door, not daring to walk away. Leaning her head back against the wall, Ella sighed and let the tears fall. Again.
Hey guys. Sad chapter huh? Sorry, I think I put in the last author's note that you guys would enjoy this chapter most, but it was so long I had to cut it in two. The next chapter will be better, I promise.
Check out Winter Skystorm's new story Four's A Crowd. She is formerly R5Auslly on here, and this is a Girl Meets World story. I personally love it.
I don't own anything you recognize.
God bless you all!
-Daddysgirl11