*Okay as always, I own nothing of Criminal minds I just get the privilege of playing with the characters for a while.
Emily came into the bedroom a few moments behind JJ only to find her in the bathroom with the door shut. "JJ come out here please...we need to talk a moment." She said looking at the door and wondering what the woman was up to. The door opened only enough for JJ to slide out, "Yes ..." was said like "Is there a problem?"
"You've never had sex with a woman?" She asked looking at the blonde totally puzzled. "No... and I'm not planning on having it with you either." Emily rubbed her face in confusion.
"Then what the hell are we doing in my bedroom... having a slumber party?"
"Don't go getting all nasty with me Emily Prentiss..." She said putting her hands on her hips and raising her eyebrows at the woman. Emily looked to the ceiling and shook her head not believing the turn of the conversation. "...that's right Emily. I am not going to have sex with you either. You heard me right...I'm going to make love with you." Emily looked at her like a dog with a new food dish.
"Wait...let me get this clear in my mind. You've never had sex with a woman...okay." She gave her that, thinking she was splitting hairs on terminology though, "Have you ever made love to a woman?"
"No..." Emily raised her hands in the air in defeat, "Jennifer it's different than with a man." She said concerned that the woman didn't realize totally what she was getting into. "I know that...I'm not ignorant." JJ said rolling her eyes. "I bet you haven't made love to a woman either so we will be on even footing tonight."
"Dear lord...okay." Emily said trying to wrap her head around what she was hearing. "I'm only going to ask one more question then I'm all yours."
"I'm listening."
"Are you...yourself prepared for this?" She watched as some doubt cross the woman's face. "I'm not being critical of your inexperience Jennifer but it is different and I love you for wanting to do this but if you have any doubts let's just stop it right now because it will hurt more than help." She was saying as JJ came to her.
"I have doubts and maybe even some fears about hurting you but I myself am ready to love you and be loved by you when you are ready to do so." She said cupping the woman's cheek and looking her in the eyes with no doubts or fears in either her voice or eyes.
"Okay...where do we start?" Emily said closing her eyes and blowing out the breath she was holding in. JJ took the woman's hand and she followed her to the bathroom. "Close your eyes again for a moment." She looked at the woman but then did what she was asked. Emily felt the breeze of the door opening and the fragrance of lavender filling her sense of smell. The beauty of the smell instantly sent a relaxing essence over her body and she smiled. JJ saw the change and her heart skipped a beat at how beautifully relaxed the woman's face had become.
"Open your eyes and step in here with me." Emily complied as JJ shut the door behind her. The room was lit with several burning candles and the water was running in the tub. "The rattle you heard in my bag was these candles. I brought them because I knew you wouldn't have any..."
"I have one." Emily said with a pout of indignant as JJ smiled, "...as I was saying... you wouldn't have any lavender scented candles."
"Oh...well that's different." She said smiling as JJ walked over and turned the water off then turned back to her. "I have noticed you have little problems in touching me so I want you to undress me." She said as the brunette closed her eyes steadying herself. JJ took a step closer to the woman, "I know it may be difficult at first but let's try Em and I am going to tell you what I'm thinking while you do it." JJ watched her rub her face as the rest of her seemed to be paralyzed.
"Okay... I'll start the process." She said as she pulled her shirt out from being tucked in her pants. Emily watched her then looked into her eyes with only love and desire being reflected back to her. Then JJ started with the top button and unfastened it while looking into brown eyes that were slowly losing fear and beginning to register want. When she started on the second button Emily caught her hands and took over. Slowly the button up shirt was being lifted off of JJ's shoulders and falling to the floor.
Brown eyes looked down and admired the cleavage before her. JJ took the woman's hands and brought them up and covered her breast with them, "Feel me Em... the butterflies are flying strongly in my stomach right now but I don't want them to stop. I want you to stir them up even more." She said as she squeezed Emily's hands causing pressure on her silk covered nipples. The sensation caused a sudden intake of breath plus an arch into the woman's hands holding her breast. Emily felt light headed...she had done this before to others but it was mechanical without emotion. The partners never even knew she was basically a robot, just an empty shell squeezing their breast but with JJ she could almost feel the same sensation that she was causing in her own body. But instead of wanting to run she felt intoxicated at the feelings being described and exhibited. She paused her hands getting caught up in her own world a moment, "Em... are you okay honey?"
"I'm...you are..."
"It's okay sweetie...that is the correct feeling." JJ said smiling. "If I was doing the same thing to you I would be saying the same thing." There was a pause in the conversation,
"Try..." Was softly said with hints of uncertainty.
"Are you sure?" JJ asked not wanting to push.
"I am." Emily said looking into concerned blue eyes. JJ unbuttoned her shirt slowly looking into the brown eyes she was growing to love more and more trying to make sure she was okay after each one was undone. Finally, the red shirt joined the blue one on the floor but Emily also had on a red tank top. She searched the woman's eyes waiting to be given permission. Emily lifted her shirt from her pants and took JJ's hands and placed them on the hem of the shirt for it to be removed as well.
JJ looked down at two beautiful breasts filling the cups containing them. "Em...I want to touch you so badly. Do you think if you put my hands on your breast you would be okay?" No words were spoken... for a moment the world stood still but the hands on her breast gently slid off and then took her hands and were slowly brought to Emily's chest as they both had their eyes roll back at the first touch. "You are so soft and warm..." JJ said looking at her trying to covey how much she was enjoying feeling her under her palms.
Taking in short burst of air Emily was fighting off the flight response telling herself it was safe and normal. "What are you thinking Em?"
"My body is say "Damn this is hot"..."
"...and what is your mind saying?"
"Shit this is too much and I need to get the hell out of here but I can't leave."
"Do you want too?"
"No... but..." She started shaking as JJ increased the feelings by gently squeezing one breast. "Oh...God...I can't...I can't. I'm sorry Jennifer." She said as JJ removed her hands and slipped them around the woman and caught her in an embrace. "Shhh...it's okay. I got you." They held each other a few moments until Emily could gain control again. JJ wasn't detoured by what happened but encouraged they had chipped away some more of the protect walls around the woman's emotions. She felt if the stone wall ever fell that her love could bandage the wounds behind it. She knew that there would be scars but they weren't life threatening like open wounds were.
JJ rubbed up and down Emily's back and could feel the whelps and scabs on her back. "Baby we are going to beat this." She whispered into the woman's shoulder controlling the anger inside her own body at the torture the woman endured. The words seemed to encourage Emily because she reached up and unfastened JJ's bra startling her a wee bit. She pulled back and the garment fell to the floor but she didn't care, "Em..." This time it was Emily's turn to, "Shhh..."
"Let me..." was started to be said but her hands finished the sentence by lifting up and undoing the front clasp of her own bra letting it fall to the floor. JJ looked into her eyes making sure Emily was still in Emily not wanting to do this with an empty shell.
"I'm still here with you Jennifer...promise." She said sensing the woman's concern then she stepped forward bringing their bodies together again as they both had a shiver run through their bodies as skin was felt on skin for the first time.
"I know I told you I would tell you how I am feeling but I do not have words to express how good your body feels up against mine right now." JJ said and squeezed her tighter trying to get them even closer if that was possible.
After a few moments Emily asked, "Can we get in the water now?"
JJ looked up at her and realized the woman was on over load and struggling to stay with her. "Yes...let's get undressed and we can get in the tub however way you want. I'm so proud of you." She added to help encourage the progress. They finished undressing themselves and Emily stepped into the tub and extended her hand to help JJ in, "Can I sit in the back first?" JJ shook her head yes and smiled noticing that the word first was leaving open the possibility for her to sit and hold Emily as well. They sat in the hot water while Emily held JJ to her daring to kiss her neck and hold JJ's breast from time to time as they both absorbed the atmosphere of love and safety around them. Emily's lips were just below her ear... "I know you want to make love and I'm mostly okay with that. I need you to listen to me though before we attempt anything and know I am being as honest as I can be."
"I'm listening..." was said. JJ knew that the voice she was hearing was Emily's logical but loving one. "I know that you have probably read or even watched some lesbian movies. But you have to know just like straight sex... lesbian sex doesn't necessarily work like the movies or books either. Most of the time two people do not orgasm at the same time. Woman mostly make love to please the other and it is kind of turn for turn thing. I hate those movies and their clichés of she doesn't drive stick anymore."
"What?"
"Oh...it's a pet peeve of mine. Some say that sleeping with men is like driving stick."
"That's rude."
"Yeah...well they have it totally backwards."
"Yeah...why?" JJ asked curiously.
"Automatic would be like when women just lay there and let a man do his thing and no effort is put forth by her. But with a woman you have to be involved with her to get her to release. You may start in first and build up or you might be on a hill and ride the clutch the whole way down. But you can never just lay there and expect her to release."
"Oh... I get that."
"Good... because I want to give you a release Jennifer. I want to make love with you to the best of my ability..." JJ had a shiver run through her body as the deep desired voice vibrated around her neck and ear. "... I want you to experience what you are wanting to give to me because you can't totally give it without knowing what you are giving." She said as she landed her lips on the woman's neck and started sucking. There was a sudden intake of breath as JJ's hand came up and gently pressed Emily's head closer to her neck signaling she wanted more.
"God Emily...this is about you." She finally got the words past her imagination through her lips.
"No... it's about you too. This is your first time with a woman and unfortunately a broken one at that..."
"Em..." was started.
"Shhh... I know but I can give this and I want to stay with you during it. Let me show you how and then I will try and let you give it to me." She said landing her lips again on the spot she found made JJ moan. "Feels so... Okay let's go because you are killing me." She said as her body became on fire with the need to be touched by Emily. They got out of the tub and dried off and grabbed a couple of the candles and took them into the bedroom. Emily turned the lights out so the room would be bathed in the glow of candle light taking the atmosphere they had started in the bathroom to the bedroom with them.
JJ crawled up in the bed and waited for Emily to join her. She noticed that when the woman turned from turning off the lights she stared at her body. It wasn't "the stare" but a stare of desire and it made JJ shiver with anticipation. Emily smiled at her and crawled in the bed beside of her and put one of her legs over JJ's. She leaned down and captured lips in a passionate kiss that sent both of them to gasping for air and shivering at the intensity of it.
"God Jennifer... you wake up every nerve I have in my body."
"Are you okay?" She asked concerned it was too much.
"I'm on over load but I'm fine..." She said looking down and smiling at her, "There are several ways we can do this but let's keep it simple tonight." Emily said looking into blue eyes.
"I like that thought..." She said lifting up and pecking the lips above her. Then on the way back down to her pillow, "...and Em."
"Yeah"
"Let's have a safe word." Emily pulled up a bit looking at her puzzled. "I know people that are into bondage and other things do that so their activities stay pleasurable. Even though we aren't doing those things the principle still applies I think."
Emily relaxed following JJ's train of thought. "I think that's an excellent idea. What would you like the word to be?"
"How about butterfly." Emily looked at her and kissed her with all the love in her heart.
"Perfect...like you Jennifer." She said and started kissing the side of the woman's neck. She moved over and down the collar bone then between her breast. JJ was tingling and wanting more, "Em..." was started then, "Oh god..." was breathed out when Emily caught a nipple in her mouth and flexed it with her tongue. JJ had mini shock waves shooting all through her body. She now understood what Emily was talking about as she felt the woman's hand on the center of her desire. She looked into dark brown eyes and knew that the woman she loved was still with her and wanting to give her all of the pleasure she could. "Em... inside..." was all she could get out. Emily understood and shook inside herself...
"Em..."
"Shhh...I'm here." was said as JJ's eyes rolled back in her head when she felt Emily enter her. She tried to keep them open and watch the woman above her but the tides of pleasure were to strong pulling her out away from the shores to floating on nothing but a balloon of the atmosphere of love that Emily was causing in her. Then the balloon she was floating on popped and her body was caught in the tidal waves of pleasure pulling her to shore where Emily was holding her and kissing her cheek securing her to the shore. "Em..."
"I got you love... I got you." She said kissing her head. When JJ could speak again she looked at Emily, "Have you experienced this before?"
"Yes and no..." JJ looked at her puzzled. "I have through giving the pleasure... my body has through mechanics but emotionally together like you just did...no." JJ lifted up and rolled them. "Can I try and give it to you?" Emily looked at her, "I would like that but I'm still not promising anything."
"A challenge..." JJ said and smiled at the woman. Emily smiled knowing she was trying to lighten the mood up a bit. "You can try."
"I'm in love with you Emily..." was said catching the woman totally off guard, "...and I want you to feel all the love that I have in my heart for you." She said as she caught the woman's lips in a kiss and started the same path that was shown to her by Emily. It was a slower process because she felt the need to keep an eye on her making sure everything was good. It became too slow so much so that Emily had to finally take her hand and place it where she need the pressure to be eased and released. When she came back to her body from ecstasy she opened her eyes and found blue ones staring and smiling at her. "Are you okay?"
"I'm good..." She said and pulled the woman into a tight hug. They rested in each other's arms for several moments. "What are you thinking?" JJ asked.
"How I've always wanted to be able to do this and how much I love you for giving it to me. I never thought it would be possible."
"So, you didn't have any issues during it?"
"It was hard at first... but with you it was different than with others." She said looking at JJ. "This time Eleanor and David were a memory and not a hologram in the room with me." JJ raised up and looked at her questioning her. "With others, I ran from my body because they were right there with me. It was almost like in person telling me I was like them. But with you...you kept reminding me they were dead and I was me not them and the me inside right now wanted to give you pleasure and receive it from you. You reminded me they were the monsters in the room not me. If any of that makes sense?"
"It all makes sense Emily and we are going to eventually make the memories disappear too." She said as she pulled the covers over them. "Love always wins Emily and I love you." She said laying her head on Emily's chest to fall asleep. After a few moments of silence in the room, "Jennifer...I'm in love with you too." was softly said into the room. She lifted up to see tears rolling from Emily's eyes and kissed her. They held each other as they walked together into the netherworld of sleep with hope and love as weapons against the demons of the past that waged war from the dark.
Okay... I know for sure chapter 27 will be it because I got everything needed out in this chapter to bring it all together. Thank you for taking this journey with me.