Franky walked pasted the guard into Bea's room. She had not been allowed to visit while Bea was in ICU, but now that Bea had been moved to a general ward she was allowed visitors. Franky was a little nervous, not that you would know it by her swagger. Bridget had visited Bea earlier in the week, and told Franky it had not been a pretty sight. "Hey ya Red." Franky said as she walked over to the woman who was sitting up out of bed for the first time since her arrival at hospital. As Bea turned around, Franky stopped dead in her tracks. Bea was almost unrecognizable. Not only from the injuries she had suffered, but her eyes looked empty. Her skin was pale, and limp. Her hair placid and unkempt, flowing loosely around her face. The white hospital gowns doing little to hide the gaunt figure under it.
"Hi." Bea said returning to look back out the window. Her drain tubes all still insitu, sitting at her feet. "It's good to see ya, Red." Franky said, regained her composure sitting next to Bea on her bed. "Is it?" Bea replied softly, not looking at Franky. "Yeah, of course it is!" Franky cautiously, she was not ready for this side of Bea, a side she hasn't seen since the death of Debbie. "I'm tired Franky. Thanks for visiting." Bea said dismissively. "What? You're not getting rid of me that easy, Red." Franky said, laying down on her bed, turning on the TV. "Whatever, Franky" Bea replied, not taking her eyes off the window.
They stayed like that for a long period of time, each woman lost in their own thoughts. Franky was not sure what to say to Bea, normally Liz or Maxine was there to help with this stuff. "Hey Bea." Franky said tentatively, sitting up on the bed, dangling her legs over the edge, facing Bea. "Yeah" Bea said so softly, Franky almost didn't hear her. "Can you look at me?" Franky was determined to get through to Bea. Franky had decided that if Bea ever needed a friend, now was it. Bea slowly turned to face Franky, the second glimpse of her friends hollow eyes, didn't help the nerves Franky was feeling. "You are not alone." Franky said, meeting Bea eye to eye. Franky was trying to keep her expression natural, but inside she was dying. She felt like crying; for the emotions that Bea could not or would not feel, and for the pain that Franky just couldn't take away, no matter how much she wanted to.
When Bea finally turned away, Franky let out a sigh. "I am alone. I'm tired of fighting Franky." Bea said feeling ashamed but it was the truth. "Bea, listen to me. You are not alone." Franky paused, and waited to regain eye contact with Bea. "We are here for you. Me and Gidge, the girls, and Allie." Bea closed her eyes, at the mention of Allie's name. "What difference does it make?" Bea said looking like the weight of the world was crushing down on her. "It makes all the difference in the world." Franky said, almost in disbelief at Bea's miserable tone. "I'm going to die in jail, Franky. And it seems it's going to be sooner rather than later." Bea looked back out the window. "I just wish they'd do it properly…for once." Bea said to herself, more than Franky.
Franky watched and waited, not sure how far to push her friend "You have plenty left to live for Bea. What about Allie? And everything you two have shared." Franky was pleading Bea, trying anything to get a reaction from the older woman. "She's better off without me. She'll do her time, and she'll be out early enough to start her life again. She'll be fine." Bea said, and although her expression was blank, and her tone flat, a single tear escaped her eye, almost betraying her. "That's bullshit, Red!" Franky said almost yelling. "She's young like you. She can start again, without me." Bea replied limply, like it obvious. "Yeah, maybe she is young but that doesn't mean she doesn't love you, or that she wants to you to give up." Franky replied. Bea looked at Franky in response, but clearly not absorbing what Franky was saying. "She fought for you when the Freak tried to drown you. And when you wouldn't talk to her, she begged and pleaded for you to listen. Do you remember telling me that Bea?" Bea nodded, "But it doesn't matter anymore." "No, you're wrong. It does matter, because you matter. Nobody fights that hard for someone they don't love." Franky answered in desperation. "Bea, trust me in this, she loves you, we all do. We need and want you to keep fighting." Franky's own emotions threatening to overcome her.
Bea looked sad, "Maybe it was all about the chase, she got me. But now it's over." Bea said, looking at her hands. They told the story of her life, and right now that looked pale, dry, and weathered. "I don't believe you. From everything you have told me about her, she loves you." Franky said, grabbing Bea's hands and turning her chair around to face her. "I mean she was able to bring you happiness, and you had laughter in your life again." Franky said, and she looked directly at Bea, "Now, I know about the chase, especially with women." Franky said, almost cheekily, Bea scoffing slightly. "And Red, you don't work that hard just for sex. And if she's as hot as you say, she wouldn't have to work at all." Franky said, winking at Bea.
"It's doesn't matter, I don't want to be with her anymore." Bea said, turning away from Franky. "Whatever you say Red. I saw the way your face lit up when you spoke about her. You can't just turn that off; no matter how much you try." Franky said, she loved teasing Red about Allie, but that seemed such a distant memory now. "I can, and I have." Bea said, looking Franky straight in the eye. "No you can't Bea. Nobody can, not even the Queen Bea." Franky said, trying a little humor. Bea did not react. "I'm done." Bea said, again without any emotion. "Bea, come on." Franky said she felt like a little girl trying desperately to get through to her friend.
"So, you get attacked for the third time, and now when you wake up, you decide to end it with her, is that it?" Franky said, she was trying to not to get angry with Bea, but she was making it very hard. "She'll get over it, move on." Bea replied. "No she won't. She'll think you blame her, like it was her fault you got attacked." Franky snapped back. This more than anything Franky had said so far, got Bea's attention. "You don't know her Franky."
Franky smiled, "I don't have too. I know women." A grin crept across her face; Bea rolled her eyes in response. "All Allie will see, is you get attacked, she's probably worried out of her mind, and then you dump her for no good reason." Franky summarized. "No, good reason! She's safer without me." Bea snarled back at Franky, making Franky's face light up with a huge grin.
"Arrgh, there it is!" Franky said laughing; she was surprised how long it took for Bea to admit it. "There what is Franky?" Bea grumbled. "You're pushing her away, in some vein attempt to keep her safe." Franky's eyes were bright again, this she knew. This she could deal with. "The attacks will stop when I'm dead." Bea said sadly. "That's bullshit, and you know it. They'll just move onto someone else." Franky said.
"Ok, you need to listen to me Bea." Franky said, again pulling Bea so she was face to face with her. "Pushing Allie away isn't going to make her safe. It will hurt her." Franky paused, and took a deep breath before continuing. "I know you think it'll be better for both of you. I did the exact same thing for years." Bea looking up at Franky's confession, although Bea already knew this, she'd never heard Franky admit to it. "Yep, and some 'chick in fancy clothes' showed me that I was hurting myself and those around me by doing it." Bea smiled, for the first time, "she's a good woman you know, Franky?" "Yeah too good, but don't tell her that. I have her convinced that I'm this smoking hot reformed individual." Bea laughed along with Franky.
"So Bea, I know it's hard. But Allie needs you, the girls need you. I need you." Franky said seriously. "I'm so tired Franky. I don't want to fight anymore." Bea said to Franky, meaning every bit of it. She looked tired, she felt tired, and she was spent in every sense. "Then rest, recover. Do whatever you need to do, but don't give up. Don't ever give up." Franky could see that Bea was tired, and she really couldn't blame her. After everything she has been through. Bea looked up at Franky, her eyes sad now but not empty. "When did you get so wise?" Franky's cheeky grin returning to her face. "When I stopped running." Franky answered honestly. Surprising Bea who was expecting a witty comeback.
Bea smiled, "look at me Franky; I couldn't fight even if I wanted to." Franky giggled, "well, not now with all of your attachments. But you don't have to be strong to fight, Bea. Remember that!" Franky said, Bea looking at her directly, before nodding. Bea knew that her physicality wasn't her only strength.
"I don't even know who attacked me." Bea said, with a hint of resolve creeping into her voice. "We can work on that one." Franky said, "The girls will help out on the inside, and I'll find out what I can on the outside." Franky got up off the bed, pulled Bea into a huge hug, that expressed all the warmth, love and compassion her words could not. "Anyway Red, my times up and they'll kick me out soon." Bea nodded against Franky's chest, but didn't let go. Franky returned the hug again, before pulling away, holding her at arms distance. "Red, don't shut us out. You need us just as much as we need you." Franky said, pulling Bea into another hug. "Okay Franky." Was Bea's only reply, but she did look slightly happier. Not happy but not sad either.