Chapter 25

Hot Stuff

MacBeth was invited to a dinner at Cuddy's the day after Thanksgiving. She was sure that House and Jessica would be spending the long weekend with Jessica's parents. What she didn't know was that House had returned to Princeton the night before. Jessica no longer insisted that he stay weekends with her family. It seemed to work out better if her parents had less one-on-one time with him. House was going to Cuddy's for dinner too.

MacBeth arrived with a Chteau La Mondotte Saint-Emilion 1996 in one hand and a Chteau Mouton Rothschild Pauillac 1986 in the other. Cuddy took the two bottles and uncorked them, set them on the table and showed MacBeth into the living room so that she could mingle with the guests. MacBeth was excited to see Wilson standing talking to another woman. He looked over at her and held his arms out to give her a hug.

"Gee, I haven't seen you for a month. When is our next appointment together?"

"Next week. Not soon enough, I miss you."

The door opened without a knock or a ring and House blew in out of the cold with a box of Moose Crunch for Cuddy. His mouth dropped when he saw MacBeth standing, gloriously pregnant and smiling. Her smile disappeared. Everyone looked at them. She recovered first.

"Greg! I haven't seen you in so long. How are you?" She walked over and hugged him, her belly getting in the way. It was the first time he had felt it, full of child, his child. It caught him off-guard. He closed his eyes to get his bearings, giving Wilson pause to think.

When she pulled back he nodded at her, turned and ran out of the room. She thought he was going to run all the way out the door but instead he went to look for Cuddy.

"I need a drink. Where do you keep the whiskey?"

"In the living room with the other booze." Cuddy was curious. "What's up with you? You're acting like you just got kicked in the balls."

"Here." He shoved the Moose Crunch into her arms and then went back into the living room, looked around and found the whiskey. He poured a large glass and gulped it down. MacBeth and Wilson both noted this and looked at each other.

Wilson said to her, "This can't be good."

MacBeth nodded in agreement.

"Dinner, folks." Cuddy motioned to the dining room and the guests took their seats. Wilson sat next to MacBeth and House sat across from her. The conversation was wandering. It finally turned to jazz artists. House began talking about Kjeld Bonfils, a jazz pianist.

MacBeth shrugged her shoulders, "I feel so ignorant, I don't know him."

"Everyone has a right to be stupid. You just abuse the privilege." House said with a voice wreaking of cruelty. Everyone looked at House. MacBeth just kept eating, trying to ignore it. House poured himself another large drink.

"House, maybe you ought to slow down on the drinking. You're going at it pretty hard." Cuddy suggested.

"I'm not a hard drinker. I actually find it very easy, Mommy."

MacBeth cracked a small smile but didn't let anyone see.

Everyone kept looking at him.

"What?" He barked at all the eyes staring at him. "She's the one who said she was ignorant."

"It was still unnecessary." Cuddy said.

They watched him chuck back another whiskey and give a Jack Nicholson, "Ahhh" with his eyes open and an exaggerated smile.

MacBeth finally raised her head and said, "Oh forget it, he has the heart of a little child... it's in a jar on his desk."

"That from a woman who was so dumb she couldn't keep her legs crossed." There was a murmur of shock from around the table.

Coming from a man who couldn't keep it in his pants. She wanted so much to say it out loud but she said nothing.

House smiled and then picked up the bottle of wine in front of him. "Who uncorked my dinner?" He chuckled, looked at the label, poured himself a huge glass and asked, "Cuddy, since when can you afford $600 bottles of wine?"

Cuddy's mouth dropped. "What?" Turning to MacBeth she asked, "Is he right?"

"Does it matter?' MacBeth would never have thought of bringing a cheap bottle of wine.

Cuddy dropped the issue but now she wished she hadn't uncorked both of them.

House held up his glass in a toast, "Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself."

Cuddy looked at Wilson as if he should do something. He gave her a look as if his hands were tied. MacBeth put a hand on Cuddy's hand to stop her from worrying. After dinner they all moved into the living room. MacBeth excused herself and went into the kitchen. Cuddy followed.

"I'm so sorry MacBeth. He's such an ass. I don't know what's gotten into House, do you?"

"No." MacBeth opened the refrigerator door and looked around. "Great, this is what I need."

"Can I help you MacBeth?" Cuddy saw her with a jar of jalapenos.

"Nope." MacBeth took a paper towel, sopped up some jalapeno juice in the jar with it, cupped her hand under the paper towel and ran to Cuddy's master bathroom. Cuddy followed. MacBeth took the towel and rubbed the doorknob with it.

"What are you doing?"

"Lesson planning. Need I tell you not to use your bathroom for a little while?" MacBeth saw Cuddy's curiosity. "Trust me, I'm a lawyer."

Cuddy gave her a befuddled shrug as they went out to join the group. Over the next hour several guests used the guest bathroom in the hall. The whiskey and the wine finally ran through House; he got up to use the restroom. MacBeth jumped up and acted as if she needed to go too.

"You seem to know your way around Cuddy's house, why don't you find the other restroom and I'll take this one." House wandered down the hall and through Cuddy's bedroom. MacBeth and Cuddy followed quietly behind him. He opened the door went into the restroom and closed the door behind him.

MacBeth started to smile and then it came...

It was a scream heard down the hall and into the living room. Cuddy watched MacBeth collapse into spasms of laughter. Cuddy started laughing too as Wilson rushed into the bedroom.

The door to the bathroom opened up and House stood there holding his penis in his hand, tears streaming down his cheeks. Cuddy and MacBeth jumped back as Wilson stepped to block their view.

"House! What are you doing? Put your penis back in your pants."

"Fuck it burns! Ahhhhh." He sounded almost sober.

Wilson looked at the women who also had doubled over and were holding their stomachs. "Why are you laughing?" They couldn't talk. Wilson shook his head, grabbed House by the elbow and walked him back into the bathroom and examined him. MacBeth went and retrieved some baking soda and water to clean off the knob. Cuddy went back to the guests to assure them that House was fine.

Wilson brought House out and sat him down on the bed, then turned to MacBeth, who was still trying to control herself. Cuddy walked back in still trying to stifle her laugh. "Do you want to tell me what's going on here?" Wilson asked eyeing both.

MacBeth raised her eyebrows but kept quiet.

"Okay, then tell me how House's penis became so inflamed?"

"He's really hot?" MacBeth suggested and then broke up laughing again.

"She's evil...she did this to me somehow." House glared at MacBeth.

MacBeth walked over to House sitting on the bed and put her finger under his chin, lifting it up. Looking down into his big blue eyes she snarled, "From now on when we're out in public don't fuck with me. Do you get it?"

He quietly nodded. She wanted to kiss him he looked so repentant. Afraid that if she looked too long in his eyes the others would pick up her feelings for him, she pinched his nose instead. It was what he did next that surprised all of them. He reached out and touched her stomach to try and feel the baby move. It caused MacBeth to shudder; the gesture was so pure and tender. When he finally pulled his hand away MacBeth grabbed her purse and coat and ran out the front door.

Cuddy looked at Wilson who was as clueless as she was. House looked down and then put his elbow on his leg and his hand on his forehead. Cuddy sat down on the bed next to House.

"House, what is it? What's eating you?"

"Life." He stood up. "I think I'll go now."

"I'll drive you home." Wilson offered.

Wilson drove House home. "What is it about MacBeth? You can't seem to leave her alone. Is there something between you two?"

There was no answer.

"Oh no, you have a thing for MacBeth and you're upset because she doesn't have a thing for you. Does Jessica know you have a crush on MacBeth?"

House looked at him and said, "What do you think?"

"It is just a crush, right?"

"I'm getting married in less than two months."

'"That's not an answer."

They pulled up in front of his apartment and he got out with his cane and walked as fast as possible into the apartment. Wilson was right behind him. House tried to close the door on him.

"No, no, no. I want to know, is there something between you and MacBeth?"

"Something? She's my attorney."

Wilson was extremely frustrated. He knew House. "If you're in love with MacBeth, why are you marrying Jessica?"

"Who says I am in love with MacBeth?"

"Your lips say no, but your behavior says yes."

"Out, I'm going to bed."

Wilson left but he wasn't sure what to believe. He wondered if House had feelings for MacBeth. And MacBeth, she seemed to be in love with Guillermo. After all, they were having a baby together. But, something didn't add up. Wilson realized he was going to have to keep tabs on things.