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Thoughts are in italics

Chapter 25

Harry hung his head as he followed the potions professor down into the dungeons and into his office.

"Stay here, do not touch anything," he said as he slammed the door.

Harry watched as the all jars all around the office shook as the door slammed.

Why is he so pissed?

Harry thought as he looked around. The comment that Draco said was still running though his mind,

"Muttfather…you would think that it wouldn't hurt so much," Harry said aloud

He closed his eyes and focused on building his shields, this was not the time to let them down, or to lose his focus on his main objective, killing the Bastard.

He was lost in his own mind when the professor walked back into the room.

"What in the nine levels of hell is going on?" he screamed at he walked across the room and to his desk.

"I am not sure what you are talking about, Sir?" Harry said, sitting up a little straighter in the chair and focusing all his attention onto the matter at hand.

"I mean the fighting that has been going on, than that show that was just put on in the Great Hall, explain now, Potter." he said, as he leaned back in his chair.

Harry looked up at the ceiling and closed his eyes,

"We knew that the Headmaster had shown Professor McGonagall's memory to the whole Order and staff. We didn't want the Headmaster on our ass for the rest of the year, so we came up with a plan, and as far as I know it has worked. That's all that this week has been and all the future fighting will be since we need to continue it so that the Headmaster says the fuck away from us."

Harry looked back at his professor, waiting for his reply,

I have been honest with him, which is the least I deserve back

He thought as he waited for his professor to say something.

"I knew I wasn't going crazy and yes, your assumption concerning the Headmaster is true, he believes that peace was a order on the Dark Lords part concerning the Slytherins and that you have just been overwhelmed with learning of the prophesy, that you followed along."

Harry shook his head, and laughed,

"I have accepted the prophesy, Sir, what will happen will happen and I will be ready when it does." Harry said.

"Very well Potter, but you still have one problem, how are you going to explain the DA, as you said everyone had seen the memory."

"Well Sir, you see the Headmaster will take care of that for me, he is very good at manipulating people for his own good. If he doesn't want to believe that the DA exist than it won't. It's as simple as that." Harry said with a smug look on his face.

He stopped and gave the professor a moment to process what was said before continuing,

"Anyway, what the hell would he know about me being overwhelmed by the prophesy, he doesn't even say more than two fucking words to me in a week. I think that he's just scared of me, Tom is in my head most of the time, but now I know and can control it."

Most of the time,

He thought to himself before continuing,

"I'm learning to get into his mind now, but I need to know how it feels to get your mind raped by him. I need you to do that for me, give me at least a little chance to understand how it feels for you. I need to know what I will be facing and you're the only one who can help me with this, you're the only one that has been there to know."

"Potter, don't try to get me off the subject, when it comes time for that we will talk about it, for now, why didn't you inform me of the fighting ahead of time, the Headmaster had me second guessing my Slytherin's loyalties. And I do not like doing that."

Harry looked at his professor, really looked at him, for the first time that night, he looked as if he aged ten years in two weeks, his hair was falling at odd angles, as if he hasn't slept in days. The black lines under his eyes where so prominent it looked as if he had black eyeliner on instead, Harry also noticed that his professor's robes hung off his body, were before, they fit to his form.

"Professor, are you alright?" Harry asked out of concern for his mentor.

"I am fine Potter, Harry, once all this bull shit is over with I am taking a long vacation somewhere warm and sunny, far away from manipulating Dark Lords and Headmasters."

Harry started laughing, an actual, genuine, laugh, after a few moments his professor joined in.

"You may go Potter; I have already told Professor McGonagall that you were going to be with me, since she did talk to your house after the incident."

"Alright Professor, but tomorrow can we start dueling again" Harry said in a weak voice, almost scared of the answer.

Their morning workouts had been ended in January because the professor's nighttime activities had picked up quite a bit.

"You may come down Potter, but if I am not there you will have to work on your own."

Snape said as he got up from his chair and walked over to one of the many bookcases in his office. Harry, thinking that, that was his cue to leave, started walking towards the door.

"Take his before you go Harry, it will help you understand the Dark Lord and the choices that he and his followers have made, including me when choosing to serve him."

Harry took the book out of his professor's hands and went to read the title, but the cover was blank, the book was totally black. When Harry looked up to thank his professor, he was gone. Quietly Harry walked out of the office making sure to close the door behind him so the professor's wards went up.

His feet took him right to the Astronomy Tower, once he was outside in the cold he let his mask fall and canceled his glamour.

In truth Harry didn't look much better than his professor; he had dark circles under his eyes and was losing a lot of weight.

"The Bastard won't let me sleep!!" He said into the night.

Harry was lucky to sleep a few hours a night; the Bastard was contently trying to get into his head and when he was asleep his shields where crap, which made him more venerable to an attack. So, in order to keep his mind safe, he was only sleeping every so often, mostly when he knew that the Dark Lord was busy with something other than him.

Harry looked down at his arms, usually his glamour covered up what was there, but for now that was off; many of his scars have gone white or started fading into the background. As he looked, he started remembering, he stared at the one that was for Sirius for a long time before he started tracing it with his fingers. He started to relax a little while tracing it, but it just was not helping with the emptiness he felt.

"I wont ever be whole again, at least not till the Bastard is dead. Here and now I swear never to love or give my heart to anyone, since they will only become a liability till after the whole fucking mess is done!!!" He yelled off the tower into the night,

Everything that he has been hiding and trying to hold in finally came out. He felt better than before. Now all that was left was to plan the final battle and kill the Bastard, which took priority, living only came second in his mind.

Harry conjured a knife and traced over his scar for Sirius again with the blade, once those six cuts where opened up, Harry added 27 more, the total amounts of deaths that he has witnessed since school had started back up in January.

He had been doing great not cutting, but ever since he started having a hard time controlling his mask and emotions, the temptation to cut was becoming greater and greater, finally tonight he gave in.

Harry was having an easier time breathing now and was ready to go and face his friends. They were going to question where he had been, but that doesn't matter, as of tonight they are going to start planning, and everything else will be forgotten.