Carla pottered aimlessly around her flat for a while after Peter had left to go and be with his family, she eventually got reply from Nick which just said,
Okay x
It wasn't a particularly complex reply but Carla didn't know what else she had been expecting from Nick if she was honest. She decided that it was about time that she got dressed. After everything that had happened she had barley had time to think about what she was going to wear to the funeral.
She tried on and discarded a few different outfits and eventually ended up in a fitted black dress. It had long sleeves but was quite short Carla did wonder if it was maybe a little too risqué for a funeral. She looked at the clock and decided that she needed to get a move on and Deirdre wouldn't have minded.
She pulled on her leather jacket, some black tights with black boots and made her way over to the Barlow's house at eleven forty five. She knew the car was coming for them all at twelve so that gave her fifteen minutes to try and offer as much comfort as she possibly could.
A week and a half ago Carla was almost a completely different person, someone who thought she was happy and someone who thought that she would never be a Barlow again but as she left her flat and thought about the past week, she knew that she had never felt more like one of the Barlows in all her life.
Carla had never ever felt like a member of The Platt family, at first she thought it was just because they didn't like her, that they just couldn't tolerate her or something but she had recently come to realise that it wasn't their fault, not really.
They were just two very different families. It was obvious in the way that they treated Carla. The Platts were as welcoming as they could be but they had a lot drama going in in their life when Carla came on the scene and they tried to make sure that they kept her out of it as much as possible so she'd always felt rather on the outside, where as being with the Barlows was different. Once the initial awkwardness of her being Peter's mistress was over and done with, they instantly welcomed Carla into their never ending arguments and family dramas.
Carla thought that maybe, deep down inside, she never wanted to be a Platt, maybe deep down she knew that even though she had changed her name she would always be a Barlow and her heart would always belong with Peter.
She walked across the road to find Simon stood outside Number one, leaning against the wall and looking very smart in a black suit. He had headphones in and was nodding along to the music softly as Carla approached him. He looked up at her and gave her a sad smile as he took out his headphones..
"Well don't you look dashing…" Carla said to him, poking him in a gentle fashion and admiring his suit.
"Thanks…" He said sheepishly, moving up a little so that she could join him against the wall.
"How comes you're out ere then?" Carla asked, standing next to him and linking her arm through his companionably.
"I dunno… I just needed some fresh air… It's all a bit much inside there at the moment." Simon explained, "Me Granddad and Tracy have been arguing all morning."
"Really? What about?" Carla asked,
"Everything and anything… I think they're just really nervous about today." Simon replied, swallowing hard and then taking a deep breath. "I think we're all a bit nervous if I'm honest, Me Dad's already on his fifth cigarette of the day already"
"Yeah well, your Dad doesn't ever need an excuse to smoke like a chimney." Carla said with a raised eyebrow as Ken came out of his house. He was also dressed in a suit only his one was a deep shade of navy blue.
"Carla… Thank you…" Ken began but Carla shook her head and let go off Simon.
"No thank you's Ken… Don't do em remember." She said, putting her arms around Ken and giving him a warm hug. He held her tightly and gave her a quick squeeze, truly grateful for how much she had done for them over the past week or so.
"Well just know how much we appreciate all of your support… We couldn't have got through this tough time with out you." Ken said as he and Carla let go of each other. She nodded at him and was about to say something when a black hearse pulled around the corner, with another black car behind.
Ken suddenly looked as if his whole word had come crashing down around him. He, Carla and Simon stood in silence as the vehicle stopped in front of them, Deirdre's coffin was in the back and was already covered in flowers. On one side there was a wreath which said Mum and on the other Deirdre.
Ken and Simon both pulled each other close and that was when Carla decided to leave them be. She let herself into Number one, as the door was left ajar and she walked into the living room to find Tracy sat on a chair, with Amy standing behind her and gently brushing her hair.
Tracy almost looked as if she as in a trance, she was staring at the space in front of her and didn't respond when Carla cleared her throat.
"The car's ere." she said anxiously. Amy stopped brushing her Mum's hair and bit her lip worriedly. She was wearing a little black skater dress with a white cardigan and black tights, she looked lovely and had pinned one of Deirdre's old broaches on to her cardigan.
"Mum…" Amy gulped as Tracy just sat motionless in her chair. "Mum…" Amy said again, but as Tracy didn't answer, Carla took matters into her own hands and said,
"Amy, why don't you get your Mum's bag and coat together so that she's all ready to go eh?"
Amy nodded at Carla obediently and went off to find Tracy's belongings. Carla pulled out the chair that was next to Tracy and sat down on it. She didn't want to push Tracy to talk but she knew that she probably needed some support right now, so she reached over and took hold Tracy's hand instead.
Tracy looked down at her hand which was now entwined with Carla's and stared at it.
There was a awkward silence between them, one that lasted a minute or so before Tracy finally looked at Carla and said,
"How did ya do it?"
"Do what?" Carla asked quietly, it was a while before Tracy spoke again.
"How did you get through your Mam's funeral?" Tracy said, sniffing as a tear ran down her pale cheeks. She was wearing a black dress with flowers on, one that she had chosen specially because it was one of her mother's favourites. Carla shrugged at Tracy and then shook her head, she looked back her and said,
"I honestly don't know… I just did. You can't prepare your self for this kinda thing Tracy, you just ave to get up and get on with it."
"I don't think I can." Tracy sobbed, holding onto Carla's hand so tight that Carla thought she would never let go.
"Yes you can… You can and d'ya know why? Because your Dad, your Brother, Your Daughter and Nephew are all going through the same thing as you and they need you… You all need each other to get through this and I know that you are not going to let em down."
Tracy then did something very unexpected, she let go of Carla's hand and wrapped her arms around her tight. She didn't say anything but she didn't have to. Carla hugged her back as the back door went and Peter came into the kitchen.
He was wearing a white shirt, black trousers and black tie. He blinked twice at the sight of Carla and Tracy hugging and when Amy came into the living room she had to do double take too.
"I've got your things Mum." Amy eventually said, once the initial shock of her Mum and Carla embracing had gone.
"Thanks Amy." Tracy sniffed, letting go of Carla and getting up off the chair. She took her coat off Amy and before they left the room she turned back to Carla and gave her a thankful smile. Carla smiled back at her as Peter picked up his black suit jacket which he had left on the arm chair. He put his jacket on and then straightened him self up as Carla got up off her chair.
"You look incredible…" Peter said quietly, as Carla stood in front of him.
"Thanks." Carla said sheepishly trying her hardest not to blush.
"Is that bad? That I'm over ere eying you up on the day of me Step mother's funeral?" Peter said, moving closer to Carla even though he felt bad for having slightly impure thoughts on a day like today.
"No…" Carla said, reaching up to Peter's tie and tightening it because he'd not done it up properly. "I'm eying you up too... if that makes you feel any better."she smiled, making light of the situation seemed to make things a little easier on them both.
"It does actually." Peter said as Carla finished with his tie and rested her hand on his chest. "So what's the verdict then?" He asked with a cheeky expression.
"Mmmm very handsome." Carla said, then her and Peter shared a very soft and tender kiss before they heard Ken call out,
"Peter!"
Carla pulled away from him and gave his hand a quick squeeze as he took a deep breath and began to force himself to walk forward.
They both went outside hand in hand, to find that many of Coronation Street's residents were all stood on the pavement in their best clothes.
Peter took hold of Simon's hand and stood in between him and Carla as Ken leant forward and gently touched the glass window of the hearse, where Deirdre's coffin lay.
"We better get going." He said, turning to look back at Peter and Tracy.
They both nodded, Tracy already in tears again, clutching on to Amy for dear life. They all got into the car which was parked behind the hearse. Carla Simon Peter took the back seat and Tracy, Amy and Ken took the one in front.
It was silent as the car started to drive off and other than a few sobs here and there the car stayed completely silent until they got to the church.
The service was held at one pm in the afternoon. The church was full of people, old faces that the Barlow's hadn't seen for ages and of course the familiar kind of faces that came from the street too.
Carla stayed hand in hand with Peter the entire time. When they got out of the car and when they were stood outside the church to greet people.
At one point she was introduced to a few people as "Peter's wife." by Ken. The last time she had been introduced as Peter's wife was by Deirdre when she was in hospital and Carla had felt a slight chill go up her spine as she had said it but this time, this time she didn't bat an eye lid. This time being called Peter's wife felt so right.
It soon became time for everyone to go inside and that was when Carla and Peter had to let go of each other as Peter was one of the pallbearers and had to wait outside, along with Ken, Liz and some of Deirdre's other family members.
Tracy and Carla both took hold of Simon and Amy who had been totally quiet and walked them to the front of the church. They sat down in the front row and as Amy started crying along with her mother, Simon reached out and grabbed Carla's hand. She looked at him to offer some support but he was staring down at their clasped hands so she just gave him a quick squeeze instead.
She really wanted to burst into tears and cry herself but she tried her best to keep strong as Simon held on to her.
The local vicar Billy, led the service and as he stepped up to the front of the church everyone knew what was coming next.
Deirdre was bought into the church by her beloved husband, her stepson, her best friend and three of her other loved ones and as she came down the aisle, one of her favourite song's Feeling Good by Nina Simone was playing.
Peter and Ken then both joined Carla, Tracy, Amy and Simon in the front row of the church, Peter had gone and stood in between Carla and Simon. Carla didn't say anything but she reached down and took his hand again. He held it tight and sniffed and then felt Simon take hold of his other hand.
A hymn was sung by all and then the service began.
Billy spoke about Deirdre for a while and then invited Liz up to say a few words. She told the church of a few good times that she had with Deirdre, times when they had been out and got hammered and then she also told them how much she was going to miss her.
Ken was next. He came up to the podium to deliver a little speech about his beloved Deirdre. He had written it down and got halfway through it before he couldn't go on anymore. He swallowed hard and did his best to continue but he couldn't, everyone could see how much he was struggling but he was soon joined by Peter, who put his arm around his Dad to steady his nerves and decided to finish the speech for him.
The sight of Ken in tears with Peter around next to him had almost everyone in tears. Carla and Tracy were both crying at this point and Amy and Simon were both breathing in unison and preparing themselves.
As Ken and Peter made their way back over to their seats, there was supposed to be another hymn but Simon and Amy both looked at each other and gulped.
They surprised everyone by reaching out, taking each other's hands and getting up out of their seats. Ken, Peter, Tracy and Carla watched in awe as they walked up to the Vicar hand in hand and said something to him.
Billy then announced that Amy and Simon had a poem that they wanted to read for their Grandma. They looked incredibly nervous as they stood before the busy church. They both stood hand in hand as Simon held up the poem that they wanted to read. With tears in their eyes they began to speak and their poem went like this…
"As we look back over time
We find ourselves wondering …..
Did we remember to thank you enough
For all you have done for us?
For all the times you were by our sides
To help and support us …..
To celebrate our successes
To understand our problems
And accept our defeats?
Or for teaching us by your example,
The value of hard work, good judgment,
Courage and integrity?
We wonder if we ever thanked you
For the sacrifices you made.
To let us have the very best?
And for the simple things
Like laughter, smiles and times we shared?
If we have forgotten to show our
Gratitude enough for all the things you did,
We're thanking you now.
And we are hoping you knew all along,
How much you meant to us."
Those who weren't in tears before hand were definitely sobbing now. There was a huge round of applause as Amy and Simon smiled sadly, proudly at each other and made their way back to their seats.
"That was truly wonderful." Ken said, tears pouring down his cheeks as he hugged them both. "Thank you so much." Peter gave Simon a pat on the back whilst Tracy wrapped her arms around Amy.
Another hymn was sung and this was the last one before Billy was going to close the service. Even though they were all in tears, everyone tried their best to sing as loud and as beautifully as they could for Deirdre's honour and as Billy thanked everyone for coming, Ken, Tracy, Amy, Simon, Peter and Carla were all stood hand in hand.
The wake was held at The Rover's Return pub of course, Steve had stayed behind and set up a lovely spread of food for all the guests. They all piled into the pub after Deirdre's burial, which had took place right after the service.
She was buried in the cemetery down the road and as the sun shone over her freshly dug grave, Ken couldn't help but smile and look upwards, Simon and Amy followed his gaze and looked up too and it wasn't long before almost everyone was smiling. The clouds cleared making the sun, beam even brighter and it was as if Deirdre was shining down on them all and smiling back.
An hour into the wake, Ken, Peter, Tracy and Carla were sat in a booth with Amy and Simon and as everyone else was sat in mourning, The Barlow's all had the same thing in mind.
"Mam wouldn't ave wanted this." Tracy said, shaking her head slowly at all the grief stricken faces that surrounded her.
"She really wouldn't ave." Peter said sighing,
"She'd want everyone to be smiling." Amy said quietly,
"She'd want everyone to be laughing." Simon smiled bitter sweetly,
"She'd want everyone to be having a right old knees up." Carla said, sat next to Peter who had his hand rested on the small of her spine.
"Dancing… she'd want dancing." Ken said, sat on the other side of Peter with a sad smile,
"Lead the way then Dad." Peter said giving him a nudge in the ribs. Ken laughed silently, brushing off the idea as Amy got up and said,
"I'll dance with ya, Grandad." Ken smiled at her lovingly and took her hand. They walked over to an open space and began dancing with each other.
The sight of Ken and Amy dancing made everyone smile and it wasn't long before some more people started dancing too. Liz danced with Steve and Norris danced with Rita. Sally and Tim got up and swayed together too.
"Come on Si…" Carla said, poking him and forcing him to get up and dance with her. Simon pretended like he was reluctant to go at first but he quickly got up and followed Carla onto the make shift dance floor that had suddenly been created.
Peter moved up and put an arm around Tracy, he looked at Simon and Amy proudly, thinking about how hard it must have been for them to get up in front of everyone like that and read that poem.
"That's a couple of really good kids we've got there." He said.
"I know right…" Tracy said with a slight smirk, "I mean… with us as parents as well… who'd ave thought it eh?" Peter chuckled at her and they watched their children dance some more. Tracy looked at Peter after a few minutes and saw that he was staring ahead, still at the sight of Carla and Simon dancing along to an old song off the jukebox.
"So… you n Carla..." Tracy said as Peter finally diverted his gaze and looked at her.
"Me n Carla?" he said,
"Oh come on Peter… I'm ya sister. What's going on between you two?" Tracy asked, looking at Peter in a way that only sister's can do to their brothers.
"Nothing…" Peter said but Tracy saw the tiniest grin form on his face and shook her head at him.
"Oh you are such a liar…" She said nudging him and making him laugh.
"I'm not." Peter insisted, "I mean yeah we've kissed a few times but we are still just… us." he said, but as Tracy looked unconvinced he then added, "We're gonna have chat soon, about us n stuff."
"Oh yeah? n what about Nick Tilsley?" Tracy asked,
"Well as far as I know... she's going to break up with him." Peter replied, Tracy raised an eyebrow again and said,
"Well she must be pretty serious about this chat if she's breaking up with Nick for ya."
"She's not breaking up with him for me… she's…"
"What?" Tracy interrupted, Peter shrugged slightly not wanting to tell Tracy about Nick and Leanne because it wasn't his place.
"It's complicated." Peter said as Todd Grimshaw came over and smiled at Tracy,
"Come on you… let's have a boogie." He said as he had always admired Tracy and as she was his boss he thought he should offer some support.
"Go on." Peter said nodding at Tracy. As Tracy got up so did Peter. He walked over to Carla and Simon who were still dancing away to the music. "Mind if I cut in?" Peter said to Simon.
"Nope." Simon said with a grin, letting go of Carla and running off to give them both some space.
"Don't go stepping on my boots will ya?" Carla joked putting her arms around Peter's neck as he moved closer towards her. "How you doing?" She said, as Peter put his hands on her waist. He shrugged slightly and then said,
"Better than before… you?"
"Same…" Carla said, leaning forward and rested her head on Peter's shoulder. They swayed together in silence, not noticing Nick walk into the pub.
They didn't notice the look on his face when he saw her dancing with Peter. They didn't notice when he sat down miserably with his Mum. They didn't notice the way The Platts all looked at Carla.
Gail with disgust, not caring that Carla was in mourning only worrying about how her son was feeling in the situation. Bethany was trying her hardest not to smirk, even though Nick was her uncle, she thought this was all his fault, David felt the same way but he had an eyebrow raised and was praying that Nick kept quiet and didn't make a prat of himself in front of everyone.
Carla and Peter were almost in their own world as they danced together, in fact Nick was only brought to her attention when Peter had gone to the toilet and left her stood at the bar.
"Hi…" Nick said awkwardly, approaching Carla gingerly and biting his lip.
This was the first time that she had seen him since finding out that he had cheated on her, she wanted to punch him hard, right in the face but instead she sighed and said,
"Hi."
"I know you said that you wanted space…"
"And yet ere you are?" Carla sighed.
"I'm sorry Carla… it's just I… I can't take this…" Nick began, "Being in the same room as you and not being able to talk to you, is torture." Carla didn't know what to say at first, whether she should just tell Nick to leave her alone of take him somewhere to talk but then she remembered the image of him kissing Leanne and it angered her.
"Yeah well you should ave thought about that before shouldn't you?" Carla hissed, not wanting to make a scene but Michelle who had been serving drinks had noticed her expression and said,
"Is everything alright? D'ya wanna go n talk out back?"
"No." Carla said plainly, much to Nick's disappointment. He knew that today was difficult for Carla and he knew that he should have just walked away but he just couldn't help himself, he couldn't help but say,
"Carla please… just give me an idea of what all this is about." Carla gave him a dark look and then shook her head. She shook her head but she still found herself saying,
"You and Leanne."
Nick took a step back. He clearly wasn't expecting Carla to have said that. Michelle had been watching and also looked stunned because the way Leanne's name had come out of Carla's mouth told her all she needed to know about the situation. Carla then turned and looked away from him, hoping that that would be it. Nick almost walked away but he thought he knew what had happened. He thought he knew how Carla knew about him and Leanne so he stupidly said,
"So he told you then… I knew he would."
"What?" Carla said, turning back to Nick.
"I should ave known Peter Barlow wouldn't have been able to resist sticking his oar in." Nick said, gutted that his relationship with Carla was clearly over. He honestly had no idea that she had seen him with Leanne herself… he had no idea that Carla knew nothing about Peter knowing… until now.
"Peter?" Carla said, in almost a whisper. "Peter knew?" Nick looked confused as Peter emerged out of the bathroom, he took one look at Carla's tear filled eyes and knew that she wasn't crying because of Deirdre. "You knew? You knew about him and Leanne?" She spoke in a desperate fashion.
Almost in a way like she was begging for Peter to say no. For him to say of course he didn't know about any of this and of course he hadn't kept it from her.
"Carla…" Peter began but he simply couldn't get his words out.
"You knew about this and you didn't tell me… after everything we've been through… after everything." Carla said, her voice hoarse, unable to believe that he could have kept this from her. Peter reached out to take her hand but she yanked it away from him and shook her head at him. "Don't… don't touch me." She cried, and as everyone in the pub turned to look at her, she stormed right out of the pub.
So... I just wanted to warn you that the next chapter of this fic, shall be the last.
As always your reviews are much much appreciated so thank you very much.
:)