Matters of the Heart
Chapter Twenty-Five:
He'd almost gone back out into the hallway to check and make sure he was actually in the right apartment, but the furniture was all the same and there was the infamous photograph of a young Sami and Eric crawling over John, the one that had led to Sami's emotional breakdown a few days prior.
So why, then, was there a tantalizing aroma of home-cooked food wafting through the apartment?
Just to be sure, he sniffed the air, but the wasn't even the faintest trace of smoke.
Did I just walk into the Twilight Zone? he wondered with a frown.
"Sami?" he called out, placing his briefcase down on the coffee table and tugging off his suit jacket.
She emerged from the bedroom, dressed in a simple but flattering little black dress, her hair worn in curls that cascaded freely over her shoulders, and a necklace that he was pretty sure had been a gift from either Roman or John for her sixteenth birthday adorning her neck.
"You're home," she observed, biting her lip nervously.
"Yeah," Lucas responded, his voice a little off as he took in the sight of her, overwhelmed by her beauty. "I just got back. You look beautiful."
Sami blushed, looking down with an embarrassed smile. "Thank you," she murmured.
"Something smells good," Lucas commented, glancing towards the kitchen curiously. "What's going on, hmm?"
"I thought it might be nice to have dinner together," Sami explained. "Just the two of us."
Lucas raised his eyebrows at that, noting the fact that she had apparently gotten herself all dressed up and clearly put a lot of work into making dinner something special, just for the two of them. "That sounds nice," he told her softly, his heart skipping a beat at the shy smile that crossed her face. "I take it Will's not home then?"
"He's at Jenn's," Sami replied, smoothing out the front of her dress, and Lucas couldn't tear his eyes away from her hands. "He's, uh, actually going to spend the night there. It was his idea."
Oh, that's subtle, buddy, Lucas thought with a silent snort, but he had to admire the kid's determination.
"So what are we having for dinner?" he asked, tugging at his tie and pulling it off.
"Um, grilled chicken, spanish rice and steamed vegetables," Sami answered, heading into the kitchen. As he followed her, Lucas noticed that the table had already been set for two, and she was using the good china, which he had teased her relentlessly about at one time because she had never used them in all the time she'd owned them.
She grabbed the plates off of the table and walked over to the stovetop, using the tongs to pick up a large chicken breast from the pan resting on the stove and placing it on one of the plates. She put the other piece of chicken on the second plate, then began to scoop rice out of the saucepan on top of the chicken.
Lucas watched her as she worked, unable to keep from smiling. While she would never be June Cleaver, she wasn't half-bad at this housewife thing. Even if she usually couldn't cook much more than spaghetti, he didn't think there was a woman in all the world that was better suited for him.
"Wow, you really outdid yourself, Sami," he commented, impressed.
"Jenn helped," Sami admitted ruefully, adding steamed vegetables to the first plate and then setting it aside out of the way. "I didn't think you'd want to eat burnt food, so she gave me a hand."
Lucas stared at her incredulously, unable to believe what he'd just heard. "You and my sister were cooking together?"
"Why not?"
"Because you two don't like each other," he answered, as if that should have been obvious. "At all."
"Yeah, well," Sami said with a shrug as she worked on the second plate. "I wanted dinner to be perfect, and I'm not much a cook, so I got Jenn to help. She is your sister, after all, she wouldn't want you to have to get your stomach pumped after eating my cooking or anything."
"Your cooking isn't that bad," Lucas assured her, unable to keep the smile off of his lips. "So you and Jenn spent the afternoon together in the kitchen, huh? And there was no bloodshed?"
"None at all," Sami replied indignantly, carrying the plates over to the table. "We talked about the kids while we cooked, we laughed when I nearly ruined the rice on the first try, and we had a nice, quiet afternoon. Is that so hard to believe?"
"Normally, I would say yes," Lucas told her, watching her as she moved across the room to the refrigerator. "But today you're full of surprises."
Sami reached into the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of wine, causing Lucas to stiffen slightly. She turned around and caught sight of his expression and bit her lip. "It's nonalcoholic," she assured him. "I don't buy the other stuff anymore."
"And why is that?" Lucas asked quietly.
Sami looked down at her feet again, something he'd noticed she was doing a lot of tonight. "I don't think it's fair, that's all," she murmured. "You can't drink it, so it would just be cruel to keep it around, right? I gave Brady the bottle of wine that was in the refrigerator."
"Thank you," he said at last, swallowing past the lump in his throat. "That means a lot to me."
"Yeah, well," Sami shrugged. "You mean a lot to me, Lucas, so it's the least I can do."
"You mean a lot to me, too, sweetheart," Lucas told her, reaching out a hand to brush a loose strand of hair away from her face, tucking it gently behind her ear. "You always have."
"I know," Sami replied sheepishly, and he raised an eyebrow. "I guess that's part of why I wanted to do this whole thing tonight. To say thank you for everything you've done for me these past few months, not just after my attack, but ever since my accident at the DiMera mansion last summer, really. But also to say that even though I may push you away sometimes and act like I don't notice how much you care about me, but I do, and I care about you, too."
"Here," Lucas said, reaching out to take the bottle from her. "Since you cooked, I'll pour."
"Thanks."
Once both their glasses were full, he held out her chair for her, earning a small smile in return, then seated himself across from her. Lifting his knife, he sliced up his chicken, then speared a piece with his fork and took a bite.
"Well?" Sami asked eagerly, her nervousness too endearing for words. "How is it?"
"It's really good," Lucas informed her honestly. "You and Jenn make a good team, at least in the kitchen."
"She was a big help," Sami remarked, taking a bite of her own food. "I probably would have burnt down the whole building without her."
"So does this mean you two are starting to come around and warm up to each other?" Lucas inquired, hoping that might be the case. He was rather fond of his sister, and it would be nice to have at least one member of his family supporting his relationship with Sami. Philip was in their corner, of course, but with his mother on the warpath, Lucas didn't want to put his little brother in the middle of that mess.
"We're making an effort," Sami conceded. "For your sake, and for Will and Abby's."
"That's very mature of you," Lucas commented. "Both of you."
"Don't make a big deal out of it, okay?" Sami grumbled, looking down at her food. "We cooked together, that's all. It's not like we went shopping and to the spa or something."
"I know," Lucas said evenly. "But it's a start. And I appreciate you trying, Sami. I know Jenn's not your favorite person."
Sami just smiled, and they ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes, casting one another tender glances every once and a while. The food was good, he hadn't just been trying to be nice when he told her that, everything tasted great. He was going to have to remember to thank Jenn for helping out when he went to pick up Will in the morning.
As they ate, Lucas studied Sami from across the table, intrigued by her behavior, but mostly just captivated by her beauty. He'd always thought she was a pretty girl, even back when they were teenagers and she considered herself to be the ugly duckling next to Marlena and Carrie. There had just been something graceful about her features, something that alluded to the beautiful woman she would grow into, and she had only gotten more beautiful with time.
But her eyes had always been the most amazing shade of blue he'd ever seen. No matter how hard he'd looked over the years, he could never find that same exact color anywhere else, save for her eyes.
A few minutes later, they finished eating and Sami took their plates over to the sink, but Lucas stopped her from washing them. "I'll do them," he explained when she looked over at him in surprise. "It's the least I can do since you cooked as a 'thank you'."
"This dinner was also sort of an apology," she murmured. "For everything I've done to you. I know I said I was sorry the other day, but sometimes words just don't seem like enough, so..."
"Thank you," Lucas replied, feeling his throat tighten a little as he reached out to take her hand in his. "I know it's probably hard to believe, but all I've ever really wanted deep down was an apology. Well, that and our son," he added with a weak smile. "But since you've given me both of those things, I guess it's time I give you an apology of my own, huh?"
Sami merely pressed her lips together, listening, and he took a shaky breath, steeling himself for what he'd known he would one day have to say to her.
"I'm sorry for Italy," he whispered hoarsely, his thumb stroking her knuckles tenderly. "I'm sorry that I let my mother and Victor do those things to you, that I played any part in all of that." He paused, licking his lips, then whispered, "And I'm sorry for letting you go to jail for a crime I committed."
Though he knew that she knew he had been the one to kill Franco, she'd held the evidence in her own hands at one point, this was the first time she had ever heard a direct confession coming from him, and a small part of him was terrified that she might turn away from him because of it.
After all, even though she had nearly died because of him on several occasions, that day she technically had died. Her heart had stopped beating thanks to the lethal injection she'd been given, and if it hadn't been for his brother Mike, she would never have come back to them at all.
A strange look crossed Sami's face, one that he couldn't really define, and his heart lodged in his throat, fearing her condemnation.
"Did you frame me for Franco's murder?" she asked, in a surprisingly even tone, especially considering that his voice was shaky at best.
"No," he answered honestly. Silently, he prayed she wouldn't ask him who did, because despite all of her meddling in his life, despite the fact that she was willing to destroy any chance of happiness he and Sami had together just because she didn't like the idea of them being a couple, his mother was still his mother, and if she asked him, he would tell her the truth.
"And you really didn't know about the execution until it was too late?" Sami inquired seriously, her pale blue gaze boring through him. "You came to try and stop it, to confess, as soon as you found out?"
"Yes," Lucas confirmed quietly. "I meant what I said all those years ago, Sami. I never, ever wanted you dead. No matter how angry I was with you, I still cared about you. I still wanted you around, even if it was just to drive me crazy."
"I'm good at that," Sami murmured.
"Yeah," Lucas agreed with a faint smile. "You are."
Sami sighed heavily, turning to lean back against the counter. "Is it a strange thing to say that I feel old all of the sudden?"
"How so?"
"Our son is growing up so fast, first of all," Sami retorted. "But mostly because a few years ago if you had admitted that to me, I think I would have gone straight to the police to turn your mother in for framing me." Lucas blinked, startled at her intuition, and she gave him a pointed look that bordered on exasperation. "Well, if it wasn't you, it had to be her."
"Why is now any different from a few years ago?" Lucas demanded gently. "I mean, Mom tried to bring the tape of you confessing to perjury against you not even a week ago..."
"I'm not doing it because of her," Sami said sourly, but her expression softened a moment later. "I just don't want to see you or Will hurt, that's all, and going after your mother would hurt you both." She looked down at the ground, shrugging her slender shoulders. "I guess losing Daddy made me realize that life is short, you know? Anyone could be next, and there's no guarantee for how much time you have with the people you love."
"You're right," Lucas agreed huskily, a swell of emotion rising in his chest. "When I saw you lying in the snow outside of Tuscany that night... I couldn't breathe, Sami. If we'd lost you, I don't know how I would have been able to go on."
"What are you saying?" Sami asked in a hushed voice.
"I promised myself if you would just wake up, I would tell you..."
"Tell me what?" she inquired softly, and there was as much vulnerability in her hushed voice as he felt churning inside of himself. "Lucas?" she prodded gently when he didn't answer, her pale blue eyes searching his expectantly, a twinge of hope lighting her gaze.
"This," he murmured, and then his lips captured hers in a short, tender kiss that somehow managed to convey all of the conflicting emotions that she brought out in him.
He broke the kiss after a few seconds, but didn't pull away, leaning his forehead against hers with his eyes closed, unwilling to open them for fear that he would see rejection in her eyes.
"I love you," he confessed in a strangled whisper. "I've loved you for so long that sometimes I can't remember a time when I didn't love you."
"Lucas?" she breathed, a slight tremble to her voice. "Lucas, please look at me."
Begrudgingly, he complied, bracing himself for the inevitable backlash of his actions. He had no doubt that Sami wanted him, he'd seen the way she looked at him from time to time, but wanting him and loving him were two entirely different matters, and every time he tried to get close to her, she always seemed to push him away.
But this time she surprised him.
Sami stared at him silently, looking for all the world like the girl he had once been friends with, the girl who he had conceived his son with. Sweet, innocent, delicate Sami, who felt so unloved and so abandoned, her fragile heart afraid of being broken again.
"Say that again," she ordered quietly.
Lucas swallowed hard, taking a deep breath to calm his shaking hands. "I love you," he repeated miserably.
For a long moment she just looked at him, with an expression he couldn't quite read. It was almost hesitant, but there was something trusting and unguarded in her eyes, something he hadn't seen directed at him in a long time.
"Do you really?" she asked, nearly breathless.
It was all Lucas could do to nod, uncertain what to expect from her now. There was no taking it back now that it was out there between them, he couldn't undo the damage of speaking those words to her, and he wasn't sure he would have even if he could.
"Lucas?"
"Yeah?" he asked hoarsely.
"I love you, too."
Lucas had to blink not once but twice to be sure he'd actually heard her right, and that it wasn't just wishfully thinking that led his brain to process her words as a declaration of love for him. "Sami," he rasped, his throat tight with emotion and his chest suddenly heavier than he could ever recall it being. "I'm serious here."
"So am I," she replied, her lips curving up into a soft, easy smile, the kind he had rarely been graced with over the past few years. "I love you, Lucas. I think maybe I always have."
"Oh God, Sami," Lucas breathed, reaching for her and drawing her face closer to his own. "You don't know how badly I've wanted to hear you say that. I-"
Sami promptly silenced him with a kiss, but unlike the one he had given her moments before, hers started out soft and tentative, before growing in intensity and passion. It was a kiss of long-lost lovers, fueled by the stifled desire that had been simmering between them for the past decade. Whatever else had been going on with them, no one had ever been able to deny the spark they shared. When they fought, it was like fireworks were erupting around them, but Lucas had discovered a while back that as much of a rush as fighting with Sami Brady was, kissing her was even better.
Everything inside of him was aching with relief, down to the very last fiber of his being. Sami loved him, she'd said so herself, and no words had ever sounded so sweet to his ears. What he'd once felt for Carrie and for Nicole didn't come close to comparing with what he felt for the woman in his arms now, and he knew that nothing ever could.
After a while, Sami began to pull away, and Lucas groaned to himself, but he couldn't help feeling a flicker of pride at the disheveled, breathless appearance he'd left her with. "We're really stupid, you know that?" she asked with a soft laugh.
"How's that?" Lucas asked, raising an eyebrow inquisitively.
"It took us how many years to get here?" Sami replied, shaking her head in disbelief. "Can you imagine all the grief we could have saved this town, not to mention ourselves, if we'd just figured this out all those years ago?"
Lucas could imagine, he could imagine very well, and he had done so often enough over the years as the distance between himself and Sami continued to grow. What if he'd gone after her that night when she fled the Titan Photo Lab? What if he'd just had the common sense to lock the door so that Austin hadn't walked in on them? What if he'd pushed her harder when she came back to town pregnant about whether or not he could have been the father? What if he'd just been honest with her about the confusing, and complicated, feelings she had started to evoke in him?
Would they have been a real family all along, the two of them and Will? Would he and Sami have been happily married all this time, instead of at each other's throats?
That was the problem with "what ifs", though, because there was nothing to be done about them. The past was the past, and there wasn't anything anyone could do to change what had happened. All they could was put it behind them, and move on with the future together.
"Oh, I think we would have still managed to cause this town a good deal of grief," Lucas replied wryly, choosing to go that road instead of letting her in on the direction his thoughts had turned. "After all, we're pretty good at causing trouble, especially when we put our heads together."
"Yeah," Sami agreed, smiling up at him. "We always did make a good team."
"We still do," Lucas pointed out, reaching out to touch her cheek gently. "We always will."
"Promise?" Sami asked, trying to keep her tone light and jovial, but Lucas knew her better than anyone, probably better than she knew herself, and he heard the undercurrent of insecurity in her voice.
"Yeah," he murmured, stroking the length of her cheekbone with the back of his hand. "I promise. I'm not going anywhere, you're stuck with me, Brady."
"God help me," Sami said, attempting sarcasm, but it came out breathless instead, her blue eyes gazing up at him adoringly.
Licking his lips, Lucas bent his head to capture her mouth in a gentle, passionate kiss, and she snaked her arms around his neck, pulling herself against him. His hands went to her hair, burying themselves in her tumbling curls, and he distantly felt her fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck, causing a small shiver to course through his body.
For the longest moment, he lost himself in Sami's kisses. The feel of her lips on his, their tongues intertwining, and her lithe little body pressed tight against his was as painfully exquisite. God, it had been so long since they'd kissed like this. Sure, they'd shared some kisses since the day he'd kissed her in the heat of the moment after coming over to get Will's permission slip, but those had all been sweet and short, nothing like this.
Deepening the kiss, he let his hands roam down Sami's shoulders and her sides to rest on her waist, eliciting a low moan against his lips from her. Her own hands found their way into his hair, tugging him closer as their kissing became more frenzied and passionate.
And then, suddenly, Sami pulled away, breathing hard and reeling from his kiss. Lucas frowned in confusion, and opened his mouth to ask her what was wrong, but she pressed a finger to his lips, silencing him before he could even speak.
"Will's gone for the night," she reminded him quietly, her blue eyes bright and trusting as she let that statement hang in the air between them.
Swallowing hard, Lucas drew on every last shred of self-control he still had, and shook his head. "No, Sami, we don't have to... there's no rush, okay? I don't want you to feel pressured just because we confessed our love for each other. We have plenty of time to be together."
"Lucas," she said softly, a small but serious smile playing across her lips, and he could see her conviction, her certainty, shining clearly in her eyes. "Don't you think we've wasted enough time already?"
Unable to argue with that, Lucas let her take him by the hand and lead him towards the bedroom.