A/N: I was going back a little and reading some older chapters of this story, and I found that one-shot smack dab in the middle that I had completely forgotten about. You know, Chapter 16, where the elves of Imladris are rehearsing a Shakespearean play of the destroying of the Ring. I know back then people said they'd like more Shakespearean Middle Earth. Is that still a wish? I enjoyed writing the last one. I think, if anyone wants it, I can write another one after this part and before the next part. Let me know what you think!

Book 4.
Lost and Found

Chapter 9.

I had barely recovered from Glorfindel's visit when there was another knock on the door.

I hate knocks.

Before I could even get up from my chair, Galdor came in, looking quite worried.

'Lindir!' he said desperately. 'I need you one last time!'

'No,' I said, and tried to be invisible. Inevitably, I failed.

'Elrond is blackmailing me,' said Galdor. 'It's not fair! It's just not fair!'

'What do you mean?' I asked. 'You blackmail people all the time.'

'I know,' said Galdor, as if it wasn't a crime, 'but that's not what's not fair. Legolas is blackmailing him back. I don't know how; he must be brilliant.'

'Legolas? Brilliant?' I said. 'Nah.'

'Well how is he doing it?' Galdor said, stamping his foot. 'Lindir, help me out. What do you know about Lord Elrond?'

'I can't help you,' I said. Then I paused. 'Wait, maybe I can.'

'Then do it!' Galdor pleaded.

I thought. I thought some more. Would this actually work?

'Galdor,' I said suddenly, 'tell me something. What are you trying to blackmail Legolas into doing?'

Galdor's answer was succinct and to the point.

I smiled.

'I need to go talk to Glorfindel,' I said, standing up and heading for the door.

'But I need to know how to blackmail Elrond!' said Galdor.

'Alright, alright,' I said. 'I'll tell you in-' I glanced at my watch. 'Two hours.'

'You'd better,' said Galdor darkly.

I laughed. Things were looking up.

Now all my hopes rested on Glorfindel and Legolas' answers to one question.

'Glorfindel,' I called, running up to him. 'I am ready and willing to give you the information about the notebook.'

'Good,' said Glorfindel, relieved. 'What does it look like? What colour is it? How big?'

'Wait,' I said, holding up my finger, 'all I ask is one little thing in return.'

'What?'

'Tell me what you're trying to blackmail Galdor into doing.'

Glorfindel's answer was not as succinct as Galdor's; but it was to the point.

I smiled. Things were going my way.

'Right, then,' I said. 'The notebook is eight by four inches; about an inch thick. Falu in colour.'

'Falu?' asked Glorfindel, knitting his brow. 'What in Middle Earth is Falu?'

'Uneducated balrog slayer,' I reprimanded. 'Falu is the deep red colour often found on barns. It was named for the-'

'That's all I wanted to know,' said Glorfindel.

'Wait,' I said, as he began to walk off. 'Glorfindel, in appreciation of your glorious balrog slaying or whatever, I will even distract Legolas for you while you search his room.'

Glorfindel was suspicious. 'You've got something up your sleeve, or I'm a dead lizard,' he said. 'And if I had time, I'd look into it. But since I don't, just know that if you're tricking me somehow, you'll find yourself on the road to Valinor double-quick.' He narrowed his eyes and stepped closer. 'I will find you, and I will skin you.' And the golden haired Elf was off.

I laughed and did a little dance. 'Everything's going my way,' I sang. 'Now where is Legolas?'

Legolas was in the library bothering Erestor. I've noticed that about Legolas; he always has to be bothering someone to be happy. He also has this strange idea that he always has to be happy; I've never felt so. It's one's duty to be unhappy sometimes. Maybe he'll learn his lesson one day; he needs some trauma in his life.*

'Legolas,' I said, 'will you do me a favour?'

'No,' said Legolas.

'Yes you will. Answer me one question,' I ordered. 'What are you blackmailing Glorfindel to do?'

'Why should I tell you?' he asked.

'Because otherwise I'm not going to trust his secrets in your hands. If it's something reasonable, however, there is no reason for me not to give it to you.'

Legolas brightened. 'Good,' he said. 'Then I'll tell you.'

His answer was by no means succinct, and even less to the point. But eventually I got the gist of what he had to say.

'Right,' I said. 'Exactly what I needed to know.'

'Are you going to tell me?' he said.

'Yes,' I said, glancing at my watch. 'In approximately twenty minutes.'

'But-' he began.

'Don't worry,' I said happily. 'Everything is going to work out great.'

'Lindir!' roared Elrond, storming into the library.

Erestor slowly and pointedly got up and left at this moment. I didn't blame him.

'Legolas, leave,' I said. 'I need to talk to Lord Elrond.'

'I don't think I want you to talk to Lord Elrond,' said Legolas suspiciously.

'Do as he says,' said Elrond. 'Or do I have to… I don't know, find something else to blackmail you with?'

'Fine,' said Legolas grumpily. 'Since nobody wants me, maybe I'll just go and jump in a lake.'

'You do that,' I said unhesitatingly. 'Now out.'

Legolas went out all in a huff, and Lord Elrond and I were left in peace.

'Lindir,' said Elrond in a low growl. 'I need your help, and I've been looking for you forever.'

'I know what the matter is,' I said airily. 'You tried to blackmail Legolas, but he just blackmailed you back.'

'Yes!' Elrond roared. 'With blackmail that YOU wrote!'

'That was not my fault,' I said quickly.

'Explain yourself,' he demanded.

'It's a long story,' I said sheepishly.

'Lindir,' said Elrond heavily. 'I know you've been a good employee all these years. But I can't stand for this, this libel, and, and writing down incriminating evidence! It's simply not right.' (He was ignoring the fact that he was in the same business, but I was wise enough to not mention that.) 'I'm going to have to fire you.'

'My Lord!' I protested. 'There is still a chance to fix everything! I can still do it! Just trust me! Believe! Have faith! Etcetera!'

'You have a plan?' said Elrond excitedly.

'Well,' I said slowly, 'I might have a plan… if you promise me one thing.'

'And what is that?' he asked.

'If I succeed in helping you get rid of the troublesome trio, you will swear to never, ever, ever fire me, even after this is all over. Even for different reasons.'

Elrond thought for a moment. 'Unless I was trying to manipulate you, why would I want to?' he asked, puzzled.

I have to admit that I was flattered by that. 'Well,' I said hesitantly, 'I don't know… you may just want to manipulate me again. That's not that infrequent of an occurrence. Just promise.'

'Very well, I promise**,' said Elrond decidedly. 'Now what is this glorious plan?'

I thought for a moment. 'I don't think I'll tell you yet,' I said slowly. 'It might not work.'

'Well, jump to it,' said Elrond. 'I-'

Galdor burst in at that moment. 'Lindir!' he said. 'Your time is up! Now tell me the black-' Then he saw Elrond. 'Um,' he said nervously. 'Nevermind.'

'No, no, come right in,' I said, winking at Elrond and trying to communicate that I wanted him to leave by a series of facial contortions, 'I need to talk to you.'

Somehow Elrond understood, and went out laughing and rubbing his hands together. Galdor watched him go with a slightly disturbed look on his face, then he turned to me.

'Lindir, are you plotting something with Lord Elrond?' he asked. I cursed inwardly. Why did Elrond have to be so obvious?

'Of cccourse not,' I stuttered. 'Elven Lords do not plot.'

'Aren't you some sort of Lord, too, though?' asked Galdor. 'You plot all the time.'

'Nevermind that,' I said hurriedly. 'You came to get Elrond blackmail information, didn't you?'

'Yes,' said Galdor.

We were interrupted by an Elven Lordly scream. I winced. 'Apparently Glorfindel found the notebook alright,' I commented to myself.

'What?' asked Galdor.

'Oh, nothing. Right. So I don't have any blackmail information that you could use on Elrond-'

'Oh false one!' cried Galdor. 'You have deceived me-'

'Shut up and listen,' I said. 'I can tell you how to get some, is the thing. All you have to do is go find Glorfindel and steal a notebook from him. It's eight by four by one inches big. It is Falu- umm, dark red in colour, and it contains information about Elrond that he will hate to have spread. Go get it and there you have it. Free blackmail information for Elrond!'

'It's too hard to steal from Glorfindel,' Galdor complained.

'Well, too bad,' I said, shaking my head sadly. 'There's nothing else to be done. Maybe I can help you. I'll see if I can distract him. How good are you at picking pockets?'

'Young Elf,' said Galdor, drawing himself up, 'you are talking to a master.'

'You just said it's hard to steal from Glorfindel,' I reminded him.

'Well, if you distract him it will be easy!' said Galdor.

We went to find Glorfindel, and soon did. He was with Elrond; apparently they hadn't finished discussing what Elrond had to do to keep Glorfindel from revealing everything in that notebook.

Elrond didn't seem at all happy to see me. He began making doomful glares at me before I was even inside the doorway.

'Glorfindel,' I said, 'can I talk to you a moment?'

'Yes, what?' asked Glorfindel. He seemed affable enough; apparently he was satisfied with my blackmail material.

'Uuummm,' I said, trying to think of something to talk about. 'How did you like my latest composition?'

'It was terrible,' Glorfindel said simply. 'Was that all you wanted to talk to me about?'

Galdor was taking his time, creeping up behind the target very slowly and un-sneakily.

'Well, no,' I said. 'I was going to mention...' I paused to make faces at Galdor so that he'd hurry up. But Galdor was not as well versed in the language of facial contortions as Elrond was. He didn't speed up. 'That blackmail you were asking for… how soon did you want it?'

'I want it now,' said Glorfindel, grabbing me by the collar again. 'I can't wait any longer. Quick, Elf, tell me!'

'Settle down, I'll tell you in a minute!' I said, gasping half in pain and half in relief. Galdor had the notebook and was tiptoeing away with all speed. 'Galdor, Galdor can't sleep without his balrog plushie.'

'What?' said Glorfindel, dropping me in a heap on the floor.

'And he doesn't want anyone to know,' I went on, 'because he knows that everyone will be angry at him for liking a balrog.'

Glorfindel slowly smiled. 'Thank you for your cooperation.'

And he went off to find Galdor. Maybe he'd find Galdor before Galdor found Elrond. That would be convenient; the less mad Elrond was at me the better.

I went off to find Legolas. And I could only hope he hadn't found out that the notebook was not where he left it.

But of course I could have only so much luck in one day.

*Lindir wrote this before the events of either The Hobbit or The Lord of the Rings. It is a debate going on between Lindir and Glorfindel about which event made Legolas more solemn; Glorfindel insists that it was the close and extended proximity to Dwarves, but Lindir says that it is due to his meeting Aragorn and trying to be like him. Howe'er it be, you will notice that Legolas is significantly more serious later in his life than he has been up to date.

**Lord Elrond, being the nice Elven Lord that he is, kept his promise... to some extent. But he found ways of manipulating Lindir still. At one time he was said to shout, 'I'm not firing you; I'm giving you a nice, long, unpaid vacation!'

A/N: The author's note at the top was getting too long. :P There is another interlude that I have ready; I randomly generated some plots with a nifty little plot generator and they are hilarious. I might put them up in between parts.

And one more thing: FandomFangirl100 has won the prize for being the 200th reviewer! Congrats! What do you want as a prize, FandomFangirl? Virtual cookies? (::) (::) (::)