As she made her way through the halls, Zoe was only vaguely aware of other students dodging out of her way. The crowds did force her to control the tears she wanted to spill, pride kept her from letting them see how wrecked she felt. The girl didn't even remember entering her dorm room but still she found herself pawing through her trunk.
She would no longer be a Hogwart's student, so the uniforms stayed behind with the quills, parchment and textbooks. The collection of possessions left over was just short of depressing. Two of Mrs. Snape's dresses folded neatly in the bottom of her rucksack along with her father's music box. A pressed daffodil from better times with Neville was added to the slim volume of poetry from Spinner's End, the Charms text that used to hold it was tossed to the side. Zoe was glad she remembered the keepsake, smiling tightly at the happy memory of a study break walk around the lake.
She replaced her loafers with a pair of ankle boots, tugging them into place as she looked around for a better change of clothes. She didn't think she should go to war without a pair of pants. Closing her trunk on her old life, she went over to Astoria's area. Riffling through, she found one pair of jeans, two black t-shirts, and a courderoy jacket. Zoe also took a green button-up from Seline Cooper, another dormmate. She struggled into the jeans without taking off the boots, they were too tight and too long but they zipped. One of the t-shirts went on, one in the rucksack, the green shirt and the jacket made her feel protected as she added those to her outfit.
She was bent over, tying her bag closed as the door opened.
"You never wear jeans," Astoria locked the dorm to stop their roommates from intruding. "You're leaving aren't you?"
"Not leaving. I'll still be in the school. I just won't be at school, if you catch my meaning." Zoe ran her hand down her jeaned thigh, "I borrowed some stuff, do you mind?"
"They're a little long." She went to Seline's still open trunk. She came up with another pair, "Here take these too, she's a little shorter than I am, but keep the ones you have. Two pairs are nice because you can trade out every day. And come over here, I'll braid your hair back so it's not in your way."
Astoria slammed Seline's trunk closed and sat, rustling within her robes to find a leather hair tie. Zoe eased to the floor in the too tight pants before her hair was finger raked back and twisted into an equally tight braid.
"You make me feel normal 'Ria, you're so sensible."
"You are normal, Zoe or at least we can pretend you are. There you go, one last taste of normal before you go be extraordinary." She tied off the hair, adjusting one of the twists. "Is there anything else you need, anything I can do? I don't like all this waiting around."
"You've done enough, my friend. When the time comes, get yourself and Daphne out, don't take any stupid risks. I'll be doing enough of that for the both of us."
"Where are you going to go?"
"I need to be in position for when You-know-who comes to Hogwart's."
"Okay, you could have just told me not to ask. So I take it, Snape's out of the picture."
"Yup, he is not available to me anymore." Zoe twisted up from the floor to kneel in front of Astoria. "The Carrows are going to be jumpy the next couple of days, do your best to keep the students calm, although I'm not sure what you or anyone can do about it. When in doubt, keep your head down, okay?"
"Nope, no more waiting for me, I'm going to fight now, and during. I decided days ago."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"You have enough to worry about, you don't need another thing on your mind. I'll shundle Daphne out, our parents will have to make due with only one of us for now. Until after."
Zoe gathered her into a fierce hug, fighting tears again. "Until after." Both girls forced a smile which easily conveyed the worry and anxiety in their hearts.
Astoria removed a jeweled hair pin from her own updo and used it to decorate the braid, a small glimmer in the dark coil. "For luck."
Zoe got up, leaving before she lost her nerve, glad to have luck on her side.
/\/\/\/\/\
The luck didn't kick in very quickly though.
Staring at the blank wall in the 7th floor corridor, she tried again and again to enter the proper incarnation of the Room of Requirement that she knew Neville was hiding. In disgust, she shut the ninth door. This one had held a long passage way to the Gryffindor Common Room and in a moment of anguish Zoe had growled at a first year who jumped as she fell out of a portrait to land on a his pile of textbooks.
She rubbed at the soon to be bruise on her hip as she studied the bricks an inch from her nose, trying again to capsulate the right idea.
Pacing again, she thought, "I need access to the room that is used by the students who are standing against You-Know-Who, the Carrows or Snape. Neville Longbottom should be in residence as leader. I am not an enemy, I want to join their cause. I need access to the room..."
Another door became visable, etching into the brick work, deepening to include hinges and a doorknob. Hoping she had gotten in right, Zoe took a deep breath before twisting the knob. She got a glimpse of hammocks stretched between stone pillars before the first spell whizzed past her head. Dropping her bag, she flung herself sideways hitting the floor hard. The impact sent her wand skittering across the floor.
Plaster rained on her as another spell hit wide, laying there Zoe felt the transformation overtake her. The scales were in place just before the next volley of spells deflected into the walls, adding broken glass from a high window to the plaster dust coating her body. Two short blasts of dragon fire made the kids fall back.
Neville came forward, determined with his wand up, Seamus and Colin Creevy at his shoulders. "Drinkwater! Change back unless you want to be blasted out of here the hard way. And no more fire."
He can't save the damsel if you're the monster too.
Pushing up on its haunches, the golden dragon with black tines down its back shook off the detrius. The tinkling of glass was the only sound as it swung around on its wings to face its challengers. Zoe emerged out of a final cough of smoke, holding her hands, palm out, loosly at her sides.
Seamus went over to collect her wand, she tracked his motions with her head, ignoring the room. She flexed her fingers as he passed the wand to Neville, a careful blankness over her face. Colin collected her rucksack, passing within inches without looking at Zoe.
Neville stowed the wand in his back pocket and passed the bag behind him, noting the small tick of annoyance in the girl he had known for so long. "How did you get in here?"
Be blunt.
"Trial and error. I'm pretty persistent."
"Good to know, I'll change the conditions for finding us. What do you want?" If Neville heard the whisper of 'spy' wing through the crowd behind him, he hid it well.
"It's not what I want, it's what I need, Longbottom. Safe haven."
The laughter was a bit much. But even Zoe had to admit it sounded out of place coming from her. Neville waited for Zoe to elaborate.
"You-know-who has set his sight on the school." That ended the laughing. "The war is coming to our doorstep, I offer my skills to help you prepare."
"So, its You-know-who now, not 'the Dark Lord'? When did you change your tune?"
"If you would rather, I can call him by name and speed up the invasion, but I thought that would be rude."
"What about Snape?"
"What about him?"
"You know what I'm talking about."
"Snape stepped in to be my guardian when no one else would, his reasons are his own. As of an hour ago, that protection will not be extended any further."
"And now you're throwing him over? A year of following his every instruction, becoming his shadow and I'm to believe that you're here on your own terms? I know I'm not the smartest kid in this school, Drinkwater, but even I can see that's bollocks. Why should we believe anything you say?"
"You probably shouldn't. You know me, I've thought over every possible question and reply before you even have a chance to think about it. I've been going over a list of why you would let me stay. And I can't think of a single fucking reason. I could be messing with your mind right now, planting new memories, changing old ones. You've experienced it before, how I can get in, and I'm even better at it now. I've already endangered everyone by transforming into a dragon in such a close space, I could burn all of you to a crisp before I even notice that I'm the source of the flames."
"The reason to let me stay and the reason to believe what I tell you is that Harry and Hogwarts are the best possible choice available, given the present options. You-Know-Who is psychotic and I wouldn't spit on the Carrows if they were on fire. Snape is no longer an option, not to me."
"I know that the whole school has been wondering what happened while I lived with Snape. I'll tell you. He would convince me that rats were burrowing through my stomach and out my back, that I had gone deaf or that my mouth no longer existed. I often screamed myself mute before I could wriggle out of the magic. He terrorized me daily so I could learn to manipulate the mind as he did."
"In retribution, I smoothered him a wet wool blanket of what-might-have been. I made him believe we were a Muggle family, both experiencing a life we never knew we wanted. He was an accountant and I was deliciously average and scar free. He and I lived decades of normalcy, sometimes I would get married and make him a grandparent. Or he would find a wife and make me a sister," Zoe choked out a laugh, "Nearly unbearable, really, nearly sent myself around the twist, didn't need his help. Some days I wanted to stay in the dream, just say 'to hell' with life. That's the danger of mucking about in a person's mind."
"Each time he unraveled my magic, figuring out that I had invaded his dreams, he would force me out of his mind to wake into the nightmare of reality. Lots of shouting matches or he would shake me until we were exhausted or too bloody. Then mutual forgiveness and a lot of drinking to deaden the pain until night fell again."
Zoe let her words hang in the air, ignoring the looks of horror and sympathy sent her way. Sometime during her speech, Neville had lowered his wand. She could see sweat trickling down his face as he held a hand against his stomach. Zoe knew she had hurt him as she spoke about the skills that held potential to make many more Frank and Alice Longbottoms. And how she had almost pushed herself that way as well.
Don't lie to him, he won't forgive.
Speaking directly to Neville, not caring if the rest of the room heard, "Truthfully the summer brought out all the negative parts of my personality. I'm vindictive, horribly vindictive. And more selfish than I ever knew. It was foolish of me to come here. I bring death to your door." Lowering her voice even more, she leaned forward in an embarrassed way. "May I have my bag back? I'll go...I'll go somewhere. I shouldn't have put you in more danger. I'm so sorry. Good God, this was a huge mistake."
Zoe took a step back and slid down the wall, hands clasped between her knees. White knuckled as she held in the hysteria. As no one moved to return her meager possessions, she stared at her hands and spoke into the room, "I need my things, Neville."
"You're not leaving. You are going to stay here."
Seamus and Colin looked sideways at Neville, Michael Corner blurted out, "No, Longbottom! Haven't you been listening! She's a menace and cracked to boot! She'll jump back to the othe side as soon as You-know-who shows his face."
"We've always said that we would take in any student who swore to fight for Harry, Dumbledore and Hogwarts. She's asked for safe haven and she will get it. With provisions."
They locked eyes, his usually warm eyes were deadly serious, "What provisions?"
"You're looking into my mind, you tell me."
"No, I haven't done that since we quarrelled. To anyone."
"Good, because you're not going to do it again for a long time." His face became even more determined as Neville crouched down before her, lightly resting his hands on her knees for balance. "The price for staying is an Unbreakable Vow that you will not press your will, or plant ideas or any of that twisted shit that Snape taught you upon anyone for two years."
"I'll give you until the stroke of midnight on New Year's Eve 2000 GMT. I need some specificity, and I won't give you a second longer. It must be clear that it only pertains to other people and only to Legilimens, Snape taught me for 3 years. I would not appreciate dying as I begin brewing a potion."
"Hannah will write up the final phrasing and will cast the vow when its ready." Neville leaned forward, close enough for Zoe to see new scars which decorated his temple. Reminents from multiple encounters with the Carrows. "Are you sure this is were you want to be? The vow is binding, if you use legilimency you will die."
"I don't fear death, Neville. Knowing that something as distructive as legilimens could be the end of me, is not a new concept. This is just more concrete. I should have declined when Snape first suggested teaching me. My life would be different but it would not be worse." She tilted her head forward until her forehead touched his chin. "I know you deserve better than me for a friend, but I have missed you terribly, and if this is the price to be at your side when the first spells are cast, I pay it gladly."
Neville shifted back studing Zoe for a long silent moment. "Missed you too." Another moment passed before he stood up and left her sitting there, "Oi, Hannah. Will you work on the wording? I want the vow in place within the hour. Make sure you have the agreed upon deadline. In the mean time, Susan, can you set Zoe up to brew some potions for us?" He turned with half smile, "I believe you can find your way around a cauldron, right?"
"It's like a second home."