The Writer Games (Or Something)
It can take decades to write a masterpiece, and years to plan it- so see what a couple of amateurs come up with in 15 minutes after a prompt. College Fool, Couer Al'Alran, and the Jaune story concepts that followed.
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Coeur's Prompt – Ren is ex-White Fang like Blake.
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The Purge
Summary: Blake wasn't the only one alarmed at the White Fang's growing radicalism. Ren was to- even before the Human Purge.
Meta-Summary: A spy/espionage thriller on the last days of the White Fang before it became a full-blown, faunus-only terrorist organization.
From a young age, Ren joined the wrong people for all the right reasons- he believed in faunus rights, dreamed of racial equality, and wanted to be the sort of Good Human who made things better, not worse. Ren joined the White Fang's protests openly when he could- and when his parents forbade him from joining their protests, he offered his services secretly however he could. That's how much he wanted to help. First it was small things: picking up items from a dead drop, or listening in crowded places where a faunus would be noticed. Then, as he earned trust, it grew: dead drops became a courier, listening became lying, and as an adolescent Ren was a secret agent of the White Fang.
Flash forward past the recap, and Ren is a full-fledged member of the White Fang. Secretly, though- his family, distant as they are, has no idea, and the only one who's aware he has a secret is his childhood friend Nora, who he's used and led along into covering for his 'secret club.' Ren is one of a number of human sympathizers for the White Fang- who at this time still exist as a minority, but a significant number.
Ren takes part in a group mission in which human and faunus agents work together for success. Despite the success, there's an undercurrent of tension- some of the newer (faunus) recruits are openly suspicious of Ren and his human peers, and trust isn't earned even after the success. Ren, a boy of few words, listens as two of the older members- one human and one faunus- grumble about the new blood. Ren notices that the new blood- younger faunus- are isolating themselves, and aren't mingling with the human members of the team.
Returning to base, the team is in time for a White Fang rally. The dynamics of the White Fang are established by the acrimonious debate. The White Fang is split between the hardliners (who want more aggressive, overt actions) and the moderates (who only agree to covert actions, but keep peaceful pressure)- but the fact that nearly all the humans are in the moderate camp is poisoning the well. Moderates are accused of being human lovers, and even the humans are challenged to prove their commitment to the cause- and so the hardliners win more acceptance/deference over the course of the meeting. All the same, the old guard- under the White Fang's first leader, who's a moderate- reign in the hardliners.
Ren- who's one of the few humans to be a part of the 'hardline' group, since he supports covert missions like he just did- volunteers for a mission in a way that supports the hardliner cause. Moderate leaders are unhappy, but Ren's human nature is the excuse the hardliners need. Afterwards, Ren talks with an ally about why- Ren doesn't believe that the hardliners are anti-human, and explains his (young, brash) views on how strength and action is what will make change. Older people warn him against such thinking, but Ren is young and brash and waves them off. After all, his involvement with the hardliners is keeping the peace within the White Fang, proving human-faunus cooperation is real.
Ren begins a series of missions that, while successful, challenge is views. Rather than moderate their positions, the hardliners use Ren as their posterchild and cover to push harder, and to doubt the humans who don't agree with them. Ren is secure, so long as he toes the hardliner line, but Ren starts to see moderates he knew and considered friends- both human and faunus- drift away from him and the White Fang.
During this time, as stress mounts, Ren finds relief with Nora, his friend at 'home'. Nora doesn't know what Ren is up to, but trusts and admires him, and is always willing to goof around to make Ren smile. Early on, Ren is dismissive and even condescending internally to how dumb Nora seems, and takes advantage of her trust and willingness to cover for his 'secret club.' But as time goes, Ren is more worn- and Nora's cheer increasingly his only reason to smile. Nora wants to join Ren in his secret club, but Ren is reluctant- early on because he doesn't think she's good enough, later because now's not a good time, but increasingly because he's concerned. Nora becomes the barometer for Ren's growing unease with the White Fang, even if he doesn't think of it in terms of himself.
And Ren is growing uncomfortable- because as the hardliners grow stronger, the missions Ren takes are harder and meaner. The opening mission's stealth-and-sneak gives way to smash-and-grab. Instead of diverging guards, they hurt them. And when one of the (faunus) agents tries to quit mid-mission, it's left to Ren to silence her- and in doing so, he accidentally kills her.
It's a traumatic moment for Ren- a mistake, and accident, something he didn't want- but it's a moment of acceptance for him with the new blood hardliners, who condemn the quitter as a race-traitor, trash, and likely a police informant. Which becomes the theme of the arc, as the rising profile of the White Fang's actions is also leading to more police attention. The White Fang meetings become worse and worse- with Hardliners accusing Moderates of being police plants, and Moderates accusing the new blood of being the most likely new police infiltrators. This starts the point of the White Fang wearing masks to hide their identity- though only the newbloods wear the Grimm Masks yet. Even as Ren is reeling from his first kill, a battle nearly breaks out in the White Fang meeting. The only thing that stops it is the intervention of the White Fang leader himself- but he is clearly in poor health, and his position is shakey. The older Hardliners defer to him for now… but the newbloods have no such respect. There are open whispers of who will replace him.
For the first time, Ren honestly thinks of defecting and leaving the White Fang- until a new White Fang recruit pulls him aside and reveals herself under the mask. It's Nora, who finally found his secret club and wants to join Ren.
Ren is trapped, unwilling to leave Nora behind in the White Fang, but unable to get her out on his own. He can't get her alone when with the Fang, and she keeps their cover and doesn't stay with him during the 'civilian' times, and to make it worse Ren's attention/interest in her starts to get noticed. Moderates work to get her into their camp, hoping to use her as leverage against Ren. Hardliners think Nora will be one of theirs if she's with Ren, but want her to prove her commitment. Ren realizes that he's no longer a player in the White Fang's internal politics- as a skilled human hardliner, he's a prize, or a threat. Ren struggles to keep Nora safe, and to keep her from doing anything very bad.
The breaking point comes with the death of the White Fang Leader. In the leadership vacuum that follows, a compromise council leadership is created- a moderate faunus, a hardliner faunus, and a human. It quickly becomes clear that the human to fill the seat will determine the future of the White Fang.
What follows is the breakdown of trust. Missions occur, but casualties start to go up- and Ren realizes that these 'accidents' aren't accidental at all. Police get tipoffs, the Schnees get a lead on a hardliner base, and moderates and hardliners alike suffer 'accidental' deaths. There's a shadow civil war within the White Fang, and human seat on the council is kept open because every successor keeps dying. It's not until a moderate- an old friend even- tries to murder Ren that he realizes what's coming: as humans are being killed or made to flee, the Human representative is coming down to two people. Ren, held up by the Hardliners… and Nora, raised by the Moderates as their last shot at keeping power.
The elevation of Nora puts a giant target on her back, and is the spark that ignites Ren's betrayal. When a newblood tries to murder Nora, Ren kills him to save Nora- and in doing so, sets off the purge. Realizing that their candidate has betrayed them, and having found police moles amongst other humans, the Hardliners declare a purge: every Human in the White Fang is to be put to death, to rid the White Fang of traitors. Any moderates who oppose this will be killed as well.
Ren and Nora flee, along with a few moderates and the last of Ren's original friends. A running battle emerges, and the Hardliners are overwhelming- especially with their champion, Adam Tauros. Ren and Nora try to fight Adam on a train, but are utterly overpowered, and Adam kills one of Ren's last friends and cripples Nora. Ren, afraid to lose Nora, cuts the cable cars so that Nora's car will fall behind.
Ren faces Adam, expecting to die, but Adam pauses. What Ren doesn't know is that Adam is having a flashback of Blake's recent betrayal- except Ren is cutting the car so that Nora will escape, rather than trying to flee himself. Adam and Ren exchange words- and Ren denies trying to betray the White Fang, only that he wouldn't stand by and let his friend die. Adam has a flash in which he sees similarities between himself and Ren- and comes to a conclusion that Ren is what he would have been had he been born a human. Adam has pity, if not mercy, and slashes Ren. Ren falls off the train.
When Ren comes too, it's on Nora's back: Nora came chased after him, and is carrying him away. Ren is grievously injured and can't talk, but Nora talks enough for both of them. Their plans- Nora's ramblings- about running away and finding somewhere they can hide for the rest of their lives is interrupted when police/SDC arrive and surround them. Rather than fight and risk Nora, Ren surrenders.
A bit of a flash forward awhile, with Ren in a jail cell. Ren gets a visitor, the first since he and Nora were separated- Professor Ozpin of Beacon Academy. Ozpin reflects on what Ren has done to date: kept quiet and not snitched about the White Fang. It's the safe thing to do, considering what the White Fang does to snitches- but Ozpin encourages Ren to turn over and be an informant and share what he knows. As the highest ranking Human hardliner, Ren knows as much about the White Fang as any human.
Ren refuses, but in getting him to speak Ozpin is able to lead him into talking more. Ren talks about how the White Fang has changed, but how his motivations didn't: he wants a good world, a better world, for everyone. And he wasn't going to sacrifice good people (like Nora) in the process. Keeping silent is the last thing he can do to protect her- so that the White Fang won't know he's alive and/or go after her.
Ozpin lauds his motivations, but informs Ren that it's irrelevant: Nora herself has already talked, spilling everything she could on condition that she share Ren's punishment so that his is mitigated. Ren can't believe she'd do that- wonders why- and Ozpin smiles cryptically and raises the prospect of the Witness Protection Program.
Flash forward a few years. Ren and Nora are living under the witness protection program. Ren is technically under house arrest, but Nora is there and makes it more of a home than anything. One day they get a visitor- Ozpin again.
Ozpin and Ren talk about stuff. Ren's knowledge of the White Fang is all tapped out, and has been for awhile. Nora is proud that Ren's 'all better' and been de-programmed from his White Fang indoctrination: Ren's even written a book on his escape and reasoning his way out of his hardliner mindset. Ozpin praises it as a tool that might help other hardliners rehabilitate away from extremism- something that transcends racial boundaries, and has proven useful for both humans and faunus..
In fact… Ozpin has his eye on one such White Fang member now. Ozpin's come to offer Ren a job, a way to escape/commute his sentence with good service. There's a former White Fang operative who's attempting to infiltrate Beacon for unclear reasons- and Ozpin wants Ren to find out why. Find out if this is part of a sleeper agent gambit that needs to be stopped… or see if this operative can be flipped like Ren was.
Ren agrees, but on conditions- that he'll be able to be a real student, that he won't be a spy or leader in any other way- but most importantly that Nora comes with him. Ozpin agrees with his demands, and Ren asks who he's supposed to investigate.
Ozpin pulls out a photo of Blake. Fade to black.
End
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Coeur's Impression:
An interesting concept that leads to an interesting premise. Ren as part of the White Fang is handled well here with the inclusion of human sympathetics in the early days, which is later purged from the group. It more fully shows the transition of what was once a very progressive group, into the murderers they are in the show. And make no mistake, as much as many people love to label the WF as repressed and misunderstood - there are effectively the same as ISIS today.
I think this story also sets Ren's future personality up well. In the show he is quiet and introspective, and it's assumed this is all due to just his core personality - but here with the way this ends you could argue it is the mistakes he has made which have led him to this path. Now as Beacon begins he is scared to act without thinking, so prefers to watch and defer. In his own mind he led Nora once, and look where that brought them? Better now to just be silent.
I don't think this would be a terribly complicated fic for anyone to try and cover for their own - Ren's emotions and reasons are well covered, as are everyone else's. In that sense the story is pretty well contained. I would have liked to see a little more Adam early on - I like his mercy at the end, but some additional build up as to "why" he shows that mercy would be nice. Perhaps with them doing missions together, or Adam being one of the old crowd who genuinely was fine with working alongside humans.
Otherwise it's good - and I particularly enjoyed the purge, which I was waiting for ever since hearing the title. It's a cruel massacre of people who once were - and still are - loyal allies, and having it as anything less would have been trite. So I'm glad to see CF went ahead with the slaughter.
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C.F.'s Reflection:
I guess I'd call this mediocre-good? I wrote this fill during a bit of an experimentation phase. Most of the experiments were poor, but this one was half-decent. Emphasis on half, since I'm not real big into the spy genre, which was what I was kinda-sorta aiming for.
Some thoughts on Ren, since this is Ren week. Ren's been pretty much a non-character for the first two seasons- here's hoping for season three- so the characterization to work with is pretty limited. In fiction, though, exceptionally quiet people tend to be smart and/or thoughtful- listening rather than speaking- which makes Ren's intelligence the obvious card to work with when it comes to giving/exploring a character flaw. In my view, I suspect Ren is the vizier of Team JNPR- Jaune's the leader and makes the decisions, but Ren's the analytical thinker who stays back and thinks. That's not a bad thing, but when it comes time to assigning Ren a flaw- because canon doesn't give us enough of a character to have a specific flaw- I tend to lean towards 'prone to thinking he's smarter than he actually is.' The arrogance of those who- knowing that they're smarter than most people- think they're smarter than everyone who tries to caution them. That's what we get here- Ren's arrogance of youth and thinking he knows best- in the context of a radicalizing group.
The radicalization of any group is something you can make a story out of. While there's too much to summarize here, I will say that this story drew from a lot of real world historical happenings- particularly the regular purgings conducted by and within communist-affiliated groups during the 20th century. There's a frequent pattern of extremists, once they are even tentatively in power, to destroy all moderate rivals so that there is no challenge to their radicalism. This used to be called the 'fellow travelers' in some leftest circles: allies of convenience who would be stepped over (and stomped on) once they were no longer useful. The saying 'revolutions eat their own children' comes to mind here, and fit well with the idea of Ren's flaw being that he thought he understood and could manage the intricacies of the White Fang politics and the implications of hardliners.
Ultimately, not a bad story concept, but it needs a lot more work than I was willing to give it- and it would warrant someone familiar with how groups radicalize and purge dissent in order to be written well. Not hard, per say, but subject matter relevance would help. Otherwise- I agree that Adam could have/should have been an earlier candidate- one of the hardliners who was none the less willing to work with humans (like Ren) who were in on the cause. At the same time, though, it was important to me that Blake not be involved- she's the sequel hook to 'canon', and Ren being known to her would defeat the purpose of being Ozpin's secret ex-White Fang agent.