Moonshine's Guide - the story is winding down rapidly. I may do a prequel to C'Est La Vie, but I am also doing a Turks story based in a hospital. So I don't know yet.

Echo The Ethereal - we shall see Michele's fate in this chapter. Hehe.

Chapter 24: A Crowded Honeymoon

After Reno had thrown the bomb, Arien found herself surrounded by turmoil. Arien never knew what exactly had happened to Clarissa's brother, but from the looks of it Rufus seemed to have dispatched Rude or Elena to swiftly carry out the execution. Nobody messed with the Shinra Company, before and now, and whoever crossed the line got to taste Shinra's own brand of justice. And woe to whoever had the misfortune to be on the receiving end of justice, because Rufus made sure that it was tenfold.

Ivanna, as expected, got very excited and appointed herself the official "wedding planner"; Arien was not planning to have a wedding at all, but rather go to a local office, get the marriage license, get Elena and Tseng to be witnesses, just sign, then run off, now that three months had passed and Vince had finally settled. Vince, apparently, had forgotten that he was separated from his parents, and now that he was back home all he wanted to do was visit Jay, Ivy's son. Arien moped about it, then put her feelings aside.

"But I don't want a full blown-out wedding, Ivy!" Arien whined one fresh Saturday morning as Ivy and she sat at the dining table, talking. Reno had gone out with Rude and Shiv, doing only god knew what.

"Why not? It's a woman's best moment in life!"

Arien disagreed with Ivy's firm belief, but she kept that in her mind. "First of all, Reno does not look good in any formalwear. He looks ridiculous."

"He looks good in the uniform," Ivy countered cheerfully.

"Yes, that's because he always looks disheveled and untidy. Make him wear a proper suit and he looks completely out of himself."

"Okay." Ivy gave up. 'We'll talk about that later. Next reason?"

"I don't like parties. I HATE parties."

"It's not a party. It's a wedding."

"Same thing."

"Still doesn't convince me. What else?"

"Too much hassle. I have better things to do."

"I'm doing the planning, dearie. You're just going to pick."

In the end, Arien's main defense became this: "Mullet doesn't go with anything."

"Then make him cut his hair."

"Are you joking?!" Arien nearly fell out of the dining room chair. "He'll NEVER do that. He'll cut my head off first."

"Doesn't he love you?"

"Not as much as his hair," Arien said mournfully.

The compromise came out as thus: no tux, no tie, but a white button-down shirt, buttoned, black jacket, and black slacks.

"What's the difference between that and his regular uniform?" Arien asked sarcastically.

Ivanna thought, then smiled. "Not much."

"Urrrrrgh," Arien groaned. "I can't believe you're making me do this. You're not my true friend."

"No, I guess not." Ivy smiled.

The next few days continued to give Arien heart attacks. When she came to work the next day, she found Elena awfully chipper and happy. Arien guessed she should be happy for her blonde friend, whatever the reason may be, but after Reno had accidentally lost her report then ordered her to write another one, she should not have been happy. Hell, she should have been furious, screaming. What made her so elated?

"Uh, Elena?" Arien ventured. "Are you alright?"

"Of course I am!" Elena flashed a dazzling smile, showing perfect white teeth that nearly blinded the raven-haired Turk. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, after yesterday's incident…" Arien shrugged her shoulders. "I thought you'd be a little angry at Reno."

"Well, no. I'm not."

"May I ask why?"

"I made Tseng propose to me?"

Arien felt that being a Turk had hazardous consequences that weren't listed in the job description: unexpected behavioral patterns among the colleagues that became dangerously threatening to the cardiac veins. At lunch, over the table, Arien reported Elena's news with contempt and disgust. Reno put the fork down, groaned.

"Iseverybody getting married?"

"No," Arien replied, signaling the waiter to bring more bread. "Rude isn't."

"Yeah, well, at least he's sane, yo. If everybody went crazy, then I'm quttin' my post." Reno took a bite out of his steak.

"So…" Arien shook her head in disbelief. "That's three."

"Please don't tell me…"

"Rufus decided to get married this month."

Reno looked so frightened Arien half-expected him to pull out his nightstick and hit something in sight, because that was what he did when he was frightened, confused, or just plain out of his ordinary psycho self. She hoped it would be the table. "This isn't right. This better be a damn dream. Why the hell is everyone suddenly deciding to get married, now that we're getting married? It's just like the time at Shiv's birthday luau!"

"What?"

"When Rude got drunk on sambucca and knocked a tiki torch into Rufus' Mideel decoration pot! After that everybody was having birthday luaus, setting fire on everybody, until Rufus said that tiki torches were dangerous and banned it. Ramuh, Shiva, all things Holy, this is getting crazy."

Arien laughed so hard she nearly snorted a tortellini up her nose. Rude getting drunk? Impossible.

And so it was. Arien did not insist on anything, now that she had lost the initial battle; Ivy presented her with choices, including the food, the dress, the cake, the flower arrangements, and Arien just picked without really examining the choices. She did not care if roses or magnolias were on the table; besides, Reno insisted to Arien that this "marriage schmuck" was to remain as just a formality. She knew well that Reno would stay with her as long as he pleased, just like she stayed with him as long as she pleased. They, being who they were, ultimately did whatever they pleased when it came to personal lives, and relationships were no exceptions. Neither of them felt tied up with words such as commitments and "long-term". For people like them who were not entirely sure if they'd live through the next day, those things ceased to exist. In a way, they had numbed so much that they did not even think about the consequences on their son if they happened to die. Rufus had promised that Vincent Miller would not be left to the streets should they perish, that was enough. The only thing that Arien insisted was the "honeymoon getaway", which was more like "fleeing from the marital panic that was all over the place".

"How about Costa del Sol?" Ivy asked as Ivy, Zen, Reno and Arien crowded around Ivy's lounge table a few nights later.

"No friggin' way, yo," Reno replied immediately. "I don't want my granny visitin' me! She's gonna cause a right ol' fuss."

"Reno, she's coming to your wedding. She probably knows already," Ivy reminded gently.

"Yeah, but…"

"Wutai?"

"No," came back the calm reply. "Rufus is going to come chasing after me with another case. I need to rest."

After much heated discussion the destination was decided to be the beach a little off-coast of Costa, which Reno grumbled about. "Why the hell do women like to go to beaches? Coulda been in the mountains, or the snow."

"I thought you'd enjoy a nice view of bikinis," Arien replied caustically. "Besides, if I was masochistic enough to want more cross-country skiing, I'll just use the training floor to kill myself." Reno kept his mouth shut, but grinned at Zen, who grinned back.

Things were underway at top speed, and without Arien knowing much about it the wedding was arranged and set. The costs came out of Arien and Reno's pockets, but they did not realize how much weddings cost, since it hardly put a dent in their fortune. Days passed by in calm tension, with Elena and Clarissa buzzing in excitement and the men generally in mute acceptance and defeat. It was obvious that the male species didn't really see much value in wedding ceremonies, and was rather more interested in the result itself. For the first time in Turk history, Tseng, Reno, and Rufus were all in agreement about one thing: women were silly and they were never going to understand the mental process of the females, if such things even existed. Arien was out of the bounds, not really caring what went on as far as they got married; taking care of her son, caring for the household and serving her duties as a tactics commander required all her attention and energy, and she did not have any left to care for dresses and scalloped mushrooms.

What about Rude? Reno had ordered Rude to stay behind and man the Turks floor until he returned. When he faced no objections, Reno got very suspicious, and ordered Arien to find out why Rude was so compliant.

"Rude is dating Michele," Arien replied right away when he ordered her. "I suppose he'd want to stick around, be with her without you making fun of him."

Reno, who was kicking a sandbag, tripped and crashed face forward into the unrelenting punching bag. "And how did you know this, baby? Rude tell everyone but his boss?"

"No." Arien watched as Reno resumed his workout. "Michele did."

"Did I ever tell you how much she annoys me?"

"Quite often, I think."

The night before the wedding finally came. Arien was still at her routine, opening her calendar book and crossing out another day. "Look at this," Arien told Reno who was trying not to think about the next day, "this is insane."

"What, yo?"

"Tomorrow is us; three days later it's Elena; two days after that it's Rufus. This is like a viral disease."

"It is a disease," Reno yawned. "It's called female fantasies. Girls dream about white dresses, guys dream about naked tits. Night."

"…" Arien stared at the face for a moment, not entire sure if she was supposed to be amused, depressed at the "shattered dream", or just plain disgusted. Finally, she issued a word that encompassed all the female wisdom that women had accumulated over the years:

"Men!"

"Ivy, this is ridiculous. Reno's seen me naked. He's done things with me naked. This modesty veil is hypocritical."

"It's a tradition, Arien." Ivy did not really need to hear just how intimate the two Turks were, but Arien offered the information anyway.

Arien looked at herself in the mirror. Ivanna was still suffering from "female fantasies"; the dress was the most impractical thing she had ever seen in her life, and she had seen many impracticalities. It was white silk satin, with no embroideries on the bodice, but with abundant pearls on the skirt that flared aggressively. She wondered how many shirts could be made from her skirt alone. Two? Three? She looked at the doorway, doubted if she could get through. She also thought that she might be airborne like a blimp with a single gust of wind. It was strapless with a straight cut, snug at the waist. The veil covered her hair and her face. She blew at the lace in front of her face, bored, as Ivy fussed over her. She wasn't really the one to "stand still"; her fingers, her legs were always moving. Ivanna demanded complete immobility, from the top of the head to toe. Arien turned, raised her arms, stood still, bent down, stood on her tiptoes as commanded, feeling it more of a torture than the torture training she had gone through when she was tested to join the Turks.

"I'm not a mannequin, and I'm not a dancing monkey in heels," Arien grumbled.

"Now stand still…" Ivy checked the dress. "Yes, this is perfect."

"Where am I going to put my gun?"

"You won't need one."

Arien kept her mouth shut, unwilling to ruin Ivanna's happy mood. While Ivy was looking away at some other thing, she hiked her skirt up, slid a holster on her thigh with a small firearm nestled in the leather. Ivy turned and frowned in disapproval.

"Usually you put your garter belt there, Arien. So your husband can pull it off with his teeth."

"If Reno's face gets near my legs, we'll end up with more than a garter belt off my leg. I'm going to play this safe."

Ivy sighed. Arien was the most unromantic woman Ivy had the honor to befriend. "Now, here is your bouquet. Oh Arien! You look marvelous."

"You know," Arien pointed out dryly, "Reno's entire 'Rebel-badass' look is going to ruin everything."

"Well, he has his tattoos covered, and his suit looks good on him. You'll be fine."

Arien had a doubt about the size of the Northern Crater regarding that comment of confidence, but Ivanna was not listening to her worries. With trepidation and a wry amusement in her mind, Arien squeezed out of the dressing room to be greeted by her father. "Hello, Father," she greeted, looking at the aged man in formalwear. "Ready to see me married?"

"Finally." He snorted. "Took you long enough."

"Thank you for the note of confidence, Father. Let's go."

Arien grasped hold of her father's arm, and entered the hall. Saw her friends, Rufus, Tseng, Rude, Shiv, Zen, Luca (who could have been Reno's twin except for the hair and the lack of tattoos), Reno's parents. Reno's father looked surprised at his son. Maybe for getting married? Perhaps he thought that his wild son was "settling down" at last. Arien bit down a cackle. Reno did not have the ability to settle down. He was always on the move, never still. And she wasn't about to change that. Reno's mother looked gentle as ever, a fragile and feminine woman whose expression, movements, entire being made the fact that Reno was her son incredulous. No Vince or his namesake. Vince would have been utterly confused as to why his mother was getting married to his father now, so the two decided it would be best if Vince did not attend the wedding; Vincent Valentine got the invitation, but did not come. Arien was not hurt by this; she fully expected it. The former Turk was not a man for festivities; he was always in the shadows. Or maybe he didn't want to see it, because it would remind him of what he and Lucrecia Crescent could have been.

"Pay attention," her father whispered as his daughter's eyes wandered.

Reno came in later in his usual stride, but his eyes told her that while he really appreciated her looks for the day, he found this entire ceremony utterly amusing and ridiculous. He raised his eyebrow at her, assessed her, smiled in a satisfied manner.

"Who will be giving away the bride?" The priest asked. Arien killed her grin. A bride. A bride was supposed to be innocent, a virgin. She was certainly not innocent and her virginity was long gone. What an irony.

"I will," her father said. Reno grinned again.

Yet when it was time for the two to swear that they will be "a man and a wife" (Arien found this odd; shouldn't it be husband and wife?), Reno never looked more serious. They did not exchange rings, contrary to the custom; Arien had clearly stated that two rings were more than enough and she was quite content with the ring Reno had given her, long ago.

"You may kiss the bride," the priest announced. Arien nearly burst out laughing again. This was supposed to be another holy rite, the first time the husband could kiss the wife. Reno happened to have kissed more than just her mouth.

"What the hell are we supposed to do?" Reno whispered.

"I think you're supposed to kiss me."

"Why?"

"Custom."

"It's a stupid custom."

"I know. Just get over with it."

They kissed, and lo and behold, they were married. As they walked down the aisle, arms linked, Reno whispered, "I'm not goin' to the ball."

"Okay."

"Tell you what. Change into regular clothes, meet me in the back."

Arien returned to her own dressing room, and wiggled out of the dress. Pearl necklace went onto the table, as well as a matching bracelet. She slid her legs into a pair of jeans that she had worn in the morning, pulled a baby pink sweater over her head. She changed her shoes into her regular leather pair. Then, with all the sneakiness a Turk could muster, she slid out the door silently.

Reno was already there, clothed in jeans and a black turtleneck. "Okay, I'm here," Arien reported. "Now what?"

"We grab our stuff and run like hell for it."

Since their luggage was still sitting in their house, Reno drove home first. The two loaded the car with their trunks, then sped off to the airport, laughter in their eyes.

"Where's Arien?" Elena asked. They had all left the hall to the adjoining ball room. The dance was about to start, and by tradition, the new couple was supposed to open the dance floor. However, they were nowhere to be seen.

Ivy came back, looking frustrated. "I found Arien's dress and her pearls. She's gone."

Shivvalan started to laugh. "They got away, Ivy. They ran away."

"What?"

Finally, it hit them. "What an exit," Shiv said, chortling. "The main course isn't here. Oh well."

It was their fourth day when Reno saw them. He had been sitting on the beach, fully protected by sunscreen and enjoying the warmth the sun offered, generally feeling happy for no reason. Arien was sunbathing next to him, fast asleep. For years they had always been on the move, and they were now truly enjoying a vacation, when they did nothing productive.

"Arie?"

She made no response. Reno sat up, shook her. The book she was reading – some history novel that was unrelated to anything – slid out from her limp hands, fell onto the sand. "Arie!"

Arien opened her eyes, and squinted at him as the sun attacked the blue-green orbs. "What?"

"Tell me I'm hallucinating."

"You're hallucinating," Arien obliged without asking anything, too lazy to ask why.

"No. Look over there, baby." Reno pointed to the distance. Arien groaned, sat up, and looked.

She saw a very blonde head and a very dark head. She looked at Reno. "So?"

"Argh. We came here to get away from our jobs. Oh well… let's wait. Maybe it ain't them." Reno sounded impossibly hopeful.

It was them, shattering Reno's hopes. As soon as the two became more visible, Reno paled. He stood up, his face livid, glaring at the couple.

"What the fuck are you guys doing here?" he shouted before they even acknowledged Reno's existence on the beach. His expression was a confusing mix of bewilderment, annoyance, and irritation.

"On our honeymoon," came the serene reply.

"You HAD to pick here!"

"Well, it's a nice place, isn't it? I guess great minds think alike." Blonde hair shook as laughter spread out into the air.

Arien sat between them as the three stood, staring at each other, uninterested. She lay back on the sand again, and began reading.

"Elena! Did you plan this shit? Because if you did, you're gonna have the sorriest honeymoon on this planet."

"I didn't know you two were coming here!"

"Sure you didn't! You fuckin' liar!"

The argument was starting to get very distracting, and Reno was stepping on her hair, which was painful. Arien slammed the book shut with a loud snap. "Sit down," she said. "Stop looming over me. Reno, you're stepping on my hair."

"Sorry." He removed his foot as she sat up. The three obeyed her command to sit down, even Tseng. She was surprised. She was also amazed at how pale the male Turks were, now that they were topless. Sure, she had seen Reno topless before, but Tseng…? She expected darker complexion out of the man. Elena looked ravishing in a white bikini. Of course. Arien hugged her knees, exhibiting her pink enameled toenails to the general public. "Okay. The problem?"

"We're here to get away from our jobs and they-" the accusatory finger was pointed at the newer couple, "-came here. That means we're in constant reminder, yo! That ruins everything."

"What do you want to do?"

"I. Don't. Want. To. See. My. Boss. Or. Elena." Reno emphasized each word with an extremely strong gusto. "So if they don't go, I wanna go."

Arien looked down. "Do we have to?"

"Do you want them here, Arie? I sure as hell don't."

"Reno." She looked him in the eyes. "We've been to Wutai, Bone Village, Northern Crater, Gongaga, possibly everywhere on this planet. I don't want to go anywhere."

"Arie!"

As per usual, Arien won the argument with pleading and begging and threats of tears. Arien really didn't want to go; she liked the sun on her skin, as far as she was protected by ample amounts of sunscreen. Besides, there was nothing to do in the north except to ski, and god forbid if she had to exert more energy to exercise. She got away to relax, not to do cross-country skiing. Reno sighed in the end, a sign of defeat.

Elena watched as Reno sprayed sunscreen on Arien's back, and she did the same for him. "Don't you tan?" She asked teasingly to the redhead. He made a face at her.

"Sorry if we don't turn golden brown like you do without becoming lobster red first, Laney."

It didn't end there. When Rufus appeared a few days later which pissed Reno off and had tested the maximum patience of the Turk leader, Reno finally gave up and shouted, "Why don't we just move here, yo?! We have all the people!"

Arien calmly shut him up by clapping her hand over his mouth. Reno was not placated however, and demanded outrageous things from his new wife, which she sometimes obeyed when it suited her.

It was the fifth night after Rufus' arrival. He and Clarissa were on the beach together; the auburn beauty was in a sundress, and Rufus was still dressed, but in a more casual style, befitting the beach. It was near sunset, and the other two couples were in the water.

Elena and Tseng were swimming together, supporting each other, as usual. No surprise there. Tseng will always lead her, Rufus thought in amusement, and since Elena thinks Tseng is perfect she will be more than willing to follow his lead. They were ideal an couple. And as for the "other two"…

Rufus sighed. Reno was splashing Arien with water, and Arien was fighting him, but seemed to be losing. Again. They seemed to enjoy bickering and fighting more than a harmonious partnership. Reno tossed a handful of water in her face, and Arien screamed, slipped and fell backward into the water clumsily with a splash. Rufus wondered how much he had spent on these two, training them, treating them, getting them out of scruples. Millions, possibly in the billions. And here they were, one slipping underwater that showed a grace of a two year old oaf, another using his Turk-trained reflexes to fool around. The Turk leader and the tactics commander were acting more like fifth graders.

Tseng was coming back to the sand, partner in tow. Good. Rufus gestured the Wutaian to come over, then told him to call the others; they were going to get dinner, charged to Rufus' Shinra card, then possibly out for a drink. Tseng nodded and whispered something to Elena.

"It's over," Rufus muttered under his breath.

"Pardon?"

"Nothing, Clarissa." He kissed her forehead. "Nothing at all."

"How dare you!"

Reno could not reply; he was too busy laughing as Arien glared at him, soaked from head to foot. Wedding passed or not, their relationship did not change. Neither of them expected it to change. But Arien would have said that Reno had gotten worse.

"You are the biggest jerk I've ever had the misfortune to meet in my life!" Arien hollered.

"Yeah, well, you're stuck with him, yo."

"Thanks to you."

"Yeah. Thank me."

"Reeeenooooo!" Reno's attention diverted away from her as he saw a flash of blonde on the beach, waving her arms. Arien seized the chance and threw a handful of water straight in his face. "We're going to get dinner! You better come now if you want it!"

Reno sputtered and signaled that they were coming, then wrapped his arm around the wet shoulder. He could not see Arien's face as they were facing the same direction. He pointed at a shadow waving her arm in the distance, then whispered in her ear, "Come on. Time to stop. Dinner."

Arien struggled a little, then started to chuckle. She looked into the sunset. "We did well, didn't we?"

He did not need to ask what she meant. "Yeah, we did. We came out of it alive."

"Alive."

Silence reigned for a few moments as the two listened to the waves slapping against their legs. Then Reno said, "Arie, that thing you saw at the Crater, care to tell me some day?"

"I saw a man," Arien said honestly. "He was… perfection. God, his face was flawless. I was dazzled by him."

Reno's expression became a little hard. "And what brought you back?"

"You." She turned, looked into his eyes, put her ear against his naked chest, heard – and felt – his heartbeat. "I guess the body is more honest than the mind."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Sorry, you'll have to figure that one out yourself." Arien smiled, covered his mouth with hers. Yes, they were alive. So many had died, but they were alive. So was their son, safe in their friend's nest for now. They felt the heartbeat pulsing under the skin on each other's bodies, warmed by the remnant of the red sunlight.

Finally, Reno broke contact. "Come on," he said, turning her away from the sunset and toward the beach. "We're gonna be late."

The bright red sun bid their backs goodbye as they sloshed through the water to the beach together, her body next to his. Triumph, won at so many lives, so many days and sleepless nights.

"Hey, Arie?"

"Hmm?" Splash splash. They ran through the water, hand in hand, just like the time in the cave. Except there were no threats, no visions, no one to be rescued. Nothing to threaten their happiness.

"Just how gorgeous was the guy?"

Arien glanced at Reno, saw him looking at her as they jogged through the shallow water. Her eyes gleamed playfully. "Let's just say," she said as their feet started to feel the sand more acutely, "that right now, you look prettier to me than he did."

"We're going to run late," Elena reprimanded the two of them. Reno shrugged carelessly.

"We were having a little conference, yo."

"I'm sure you were." Elena turned, and ran to follow Tseng. Reno broke out into a run again, still holding Arien's hand.